


A Melody of Change

by Otaku_Princess010



Category: Diabolik Lovers
Genre: Abuse, Angst and Humor, Blow Jobs, Complete, Drunk Sex, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Falling In Love, Fights, First Love, First Time, First story, Fluff, High School, Hurt/Comfort, Nightmares, Piano, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Punishment, Secrets, Sex, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Stockholm Syndrome, Think of more later, Tsundere Subaru, Vampires, love everywhere, really fluffy yet has good smut, what is life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-11
Updated: 2017-08-04
Packaged: 2018-04-20 06:05:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 40
Words: 187,342
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4776407
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Otaku_Princess010/pseuds/Otaku_Princess010
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After four long years, Yui is finally reunited with her sister, Hikari. This should be a turning point in Hikari's life, a new slate for her to work with. She wants to become a different person, but will her scarring past prevent her from changing for the better? Or maybe all she needs is a music room and a very mysterious, sapphire eyed vampire. E for sexual and violent themes.<br/></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. My Sister

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE READ THIS NOTE
> 
> Hi reader. I just want to say something before you read this story. I wrote this at a young age and it deals with subjects and matters that I didn’t entirely understand . Things such as rape, unhealthy relationships, and abuse comes up and at the time I wrote this, I did not really get how to write and portray it well, I just went off of how the show itself and other not very good things. 
> 
> You may ask why I don’t fix it, and that’s because I want to keep this story how I wrote it so both you the reader and myself can see how I grow in my writing style and what I focus on in my writing. That being said, take the beginning chapters with a (big) grain of salt as that was written by an impressionable teen who wanted to write stories like everyone else.

**Yui's POV**

I should be happy. For the first time in two months, one of a simple request has been granted: to be left alone in peace and quiet. Every night I'm disturbed by one of the brothers. Either Laito or Ayato are teasing me or Kanato is mumbling down the hall talking to Teddy. And when it is quiet, someone comes into my room, and decides it's feeding time. They don't give me any privacy, not like they care. Ayato even tried to feed when I was in the middle of bathing myself.

Shuu told me to go outside for about an hour while he and his brothers took care of private matters.'If you even so much as think about trying to sneak off the property, you'll be severely punished,' I remember Reiji saying before slamming the doors in my face.

I walk along the rose bushes in the garden, trying to occupy my thoughts with something that doesn't concern what may be happening. The silence feels weird, not an owl hoos nor the wind howls. I expect for one of the vampires to appear any second and harass me, but it never happens.

I pluck a rose that has only a few thorns, and walk to the marble gazebo. I debate whether it has been an hour yet. Not having a phone nor watch, I look up at the sky. The half-moon shines down on me, the sky sprinkled with stars. How I wish I could just be swallowed up by the night. I can leave this hell where I'm treated like livestock. I pluck the petals from the rose, letting it chose whether I stay outside or go to my room.

"Inside" pluck "outside" pluck "inside," I say as a tear off the red petals. I sigh looking at the last petal pinched between my index and thumb. "Inside I shall go," I say to myself. I walk the marble path to the front of the house. Out of the corner of my eye, I see a black car. The same one I rode here in.

My pace quickens, so much that I'm full on sprinting. I'm gasping for air by the time I reach the thick oak doors. The door wasn't fully shut, which is odd. Reiji slammed the door in my face, meaning it has been opened since then.

I peer inside. I can hear murmuring from down the hall. Without a moment of hesitation, I walk into the greeting area. The clock on the wall read 12:43, meaning I've been out for almost an hour and a half. I tip-toe down the corridor. I strain my ears to pick up the conversation.

"I don't mind having two, what about you Teddy?" I hear Kanato's voice first. It always seems to make me uneasy whenever I hear him talk to stuffed animal he never puts down. Two what?

"I agree. I'm sure Bitch-chan would be delighted," Laito coos, sending a shiver up my spine.

"We have never had two before. She was sent early, so I think she should just be sent back," Reiji argues. She?! There's another girl here? Another bride?

"What the hell," I hear in an unfamiliar girl's voice. Is she the new bride? "What are you guys talking about? I'm not a product, you can't talk about me like that. I don't even want to be here, so I'll just go!" I'm so shocked that I have no time to react when the door swings open.

I'm face to face with her. She has slightly wavy, shoulder length, brown hair. She is just, slightly taller than me with tan skin. Her pink eyes stare back at me; they look exactly like mine's. "Yui?" she asks, so softly, I barely heard her.

As soon as my name left her lips, she falls to the floor. I just stare at her in wonderment as Reiji, the closest, hurries to catch her. "You were told to stay outside," he says in a venomous voice.

"I-i-it's been more than an hour, and I was feeling hungry," I say, stuttering out a lie.

"You can't be helped. Yui, go to your room, I'll deal with you later. Shuu, make sure the spare bedroom is ready for our guest," Reiji commands. To my surprise, Shuu actually rises from the couch. He takes the mysterious girl from Reiji and leaves the room.

"Who is sh-she? How does she know my name?" I ask, pushing my luck. Reiji narrows his eyes.

"I will tell you later, now leave," he says sternly. I leave the room and the brothers, my mind racing a million miles a second. Why is she here? Is she the new bride? How does she know me? What's going to happen to me since she's here now?

Before I realize it I'm in front of my door. I enter and fall onto my bed without removing my slightly dirty attire. It's only around 1:00, and because I have to follow the vampires' schedule, bed isn't until 9:00 am. I rest my head on my pillow to try and think. Without knowing, I slowly start to drift off into a light slumber.

* * *

The sunlight reflecting off the lake makes the water sparkle. Tiny bugs dance on the surface, causing small ripples in the water. I sit on the grass, sticking my feet in the water. They are small and chubby. My shirt and shorts soaked, stuck to the skin. My hair styled in two pony tail, droopy due to the water. Water is poured over my head. I shriek in surprise and a second figure comes into view. Her brown hair braided down her back, pink eyes filled with joy.

"Come on, Yui," she says in between her giggles. "Let's go back into the water!"

"Let's go, Hikari," I laugh, taking her hand. We run into the water together.

But the lake is gone in the blink of an eye. All I hear is screaming of a girl and the shout of adults.

"Don't take her," I say. "Take me instead." Two men in suits drag the crying brunette away, my dad holding me back. The girl locks eyes with me, 'save me' they say. She screams, horror clearly written across her face. She is brutally shoved inside the black car and it speeds away. My dad release me and I fall to the ground.

"You monster," I say, tears spilling about of my eyes. I turn to my dad. "You're a horrible person, I hope you die." Everything starts to spin and it all goes black.

* * *

I wake up in a cold sweat. My breath comes out in ragged gasps.  _I have to go see her_. The thought is the only thing on my mind. I don't care what the boys do, I'm going to find her.

I jump off my bed and run to the door. It swings open, but instead of running into the empty hallway, I crash into Laito.

"Oooh, Bitch-chan, you're so excited to see me, I'm greeted with a hug," he says enveloping his arms around me. I struggle to escape his grip, but he just squeezes me tighter.

"Why do you always try to fight me, Bitch-chan?" he coos. "Don't you know it only turns me on?" he says picking me up bridal style. He carries me to the bed, and drops me on it. He pins me down my wrist, and puts his face by my ear and whispers. "How about some fun?"

He nibbles on my earlobe, then goes down to my neck. He licks my skin and sinks his fangs into it. I whimper as he sucks my neck. His knee moves between my legs. He stops, and moves down to my lower neck. Making another piecing, another whimper slips my lips.

"Out of all the brides we have had, you arouse me the most, Bitch-chan," the redhead says, smirking. His fingers tickle my thigh, sending a shiver down my spine.

"No, Laito, stop. I-I-I don't want this," I whisper.

"I hate to interrupt, but I need Yui," I hear voice say from the doorway, Reiji. I sigh a breath of relief, but quickly hold in one. Is he here to punish me?

"What a mood killer," Laito says in disgust. "I guess we will finish later, Bitch-chan." He rises and leaves my room with a wink. I want to roll my eyes. How this vampire disgust me.

"As you know," the glasses wearing vampire starts, not fazed at all but what he just walked in on. "We have a new bride. She was sent early, for reasons that don't concern you. She will be staying here with us. She is one of the Church's sacrifices, so she is on the same level with you. Tonight we are having a dinner together, so I expect you to be there by 7:00, sharp. Your punishment we be dealt with tomorrow." He turns to leave.

"Wait," I protest. My heart pounds thinking of my punishment, but I have to press back the thought. There is something more important than some punishment right now. I look up at the glasses wearing vampire, eyeing as serious as I can. "When I'm going to see her? When do I get to talk to my sister?"


	2. Together Again

The sound of utensils on glass plates echoes throughout the dining hall. No one has spoken a single word, not knowing what to say. Today's events surprised everyone, even Reiji. Of course, I can't say that about Shuu, the only time he reveals the slightest bit of emotion is when he's annoyed.

I can't be bothered by that right now. I need to hurry up and finish my food so I can talk to Hikari. Reiji refused to let her join us, he thinks that there would be too much commotion. I would have been finished ages ago, but anytime I start to eat quickly, the grey haired vampire glares at me. It's agonizing being down here when I should be seeing my sister.

"Well," Ayato says, shattering the silence. "I've finished my meal." He rises and starts to walk to the double doors.

"It is proper table manners to excuse yourself," Reiji says, narrowing his eyes at his half-brother. "You better not go and disturb our guest."

"Yours Truly doesn't need to excuse himself," Ayato spits back. He stands in the door and says, "I'm just going to give her a proper welcome." He leaves the room with a mischievous smirk.

* * *

**Hikari's POV**

"We have arrived," I hear the car driver state, awaking me from my nap. It takes me some time to remember where I am and what's going on. I just left the Church and I'm being taken to whomever is going to be my new 'guardian', a very dumb caretaker from the looks of it. Who in their right mind would want to meet someone at 12:30 at night?

I step out of the black car and gaze at my surrounding. The house is huge, no, house is an understatement. It's a mansion, and only six teenage brothers live here? It looks almost Gothic, with long windows and balconies. There is a large fountain in the walkway, I take a seat. I fell asleep during the hour car ride, so I wasn't able to full practice my introduction.

Hello, my name is Hikari Komori, I'm seventeen years old. I was informed that I'm suppose to be staying here for a bit. I appropriate the kindness you are giving me, a complete stranger. I hope we can become great inmates. I have to go through it a few times in my head before I can say it without stuttering.

I work up my courage, grubbing my duffle bag, and walk to the door. I knock the door knocker and wait for someone to open the door. A small movement catches my eyes. A figure is moving in the garden. All I see is a blonde head, the rest covered by hedges. I'm about to call out, but the front door opens with a loud creak.

"Hello?" I ask as I step in. I look behind the door, but no one is present. I walk down the hall slowly, taking in the area. It is a grand greeting area, with purple walls and marble pillars. The family that lives here must be loaded!

"You're supposed to be-," a voice says, making me jump and drop my bag. I look to my right and see an orange haired guy sitting up on a chair. His eyes are a deep blue, each ear occupied with an earphone. My heart skips two bits as I look at him. His eyes are unmistakable the same sapphire color. The face structure too, way too similar for my liking. I look him over, there is no mistaking the resemblance. This complete stranger looks more like a twin of Natsume than Kaname ever did. The thought makes my heart ache and palms sweat.

I stare at him for a moment longer than I should have, and I see the stranger narrows his eyes at me. He scans me, taking in every inch of me. The eye connect between the two of us is uneasy, and I look down in discomfort.

"Oh, I-I'm sorry. I knocked on the door and it opened, so I thought I was supposed to come in," I say walking closer to the guy.

"People shouldn't just wander into strangers' houses, it could be dangerous," he states rising. He walk right up to my, making me freeze. He leans so close to me I can feel his breath on my ear. "Are you the guest?" he asks.

I stay silent for a moment, but quickly answer, scared I'd would be hurt if I didn't. "Y-Y-Yes, I'm Hikari Komori," I say. He sighs and backs away. He starts walking down the hall. After a moment of hesitation, I follow.

We walk into a new room, where there are five other boys. My stomach drops and I get slightly weak in the knees. Six of them. Six teenage boys, that is what they told me at the Church. I feel as if the air in the room is becoming thinner and I'm about to start hyperventilating. No, this isn't good, it can only end badly. Calm down, Hikari calm down. It isn't going to end like last time, even though there is three times as many males for me to live with, they are different. Even if I don't fully trust Father, he trusts them.

I take each one in individually. I was told that all of the guys are brothers. But it doesn't seem like it, they don't even look alike. Well only two do, they both have red hair and emerald green eyes. The one with the shorter hair cut grabs my attention. He catches my lingering gaze and I look away.

"Don't be afraid to look at Yours Truly," he says with a smirk.

"So," the grey haired one begins, "She is the one from the Church?" I looks at the one that escorted me in. He simply nods. The silver haired one stares at me.

"Oh, sorry," I apologies. "I'm Hikari Komori. I was told I would be staying here. I am-"

"We know who you are," he says, cutting me off. "That is Shuu, the eldest, I'm Reiji, these three," he says pointing at the two redheads and the one with purple hair that has been murmuring to his bear, "are the triplets, Ayato, Laito, and Kanato. The youngest is Subaru." He points at a white hair guy that has been silent the whole time.

"May I ask why I'm here?" I say nervously.

"You were sent by the Church to be the new bride." Bride?!

"I wasn't informed about this. What do you mean a bride?" I protest, anger and fright slowly boiling in me.

"I not very comfortable about have you here either," he say calmly. Under his breath he mutters, "I don't know how I feel about having two of you." Two? There's another girl here?

"I don't mind having two, what about you Teddy?" the purple hair boy-Kanato? - says to his bear in a creepy voice.

"I agree. I'm sure Bitch-chan would be delighted," the Fedora wearing one says, winking at me. Who's Bitch-can? Is she the other 'bride'?

"We have never had two before. She was sent early, so I think she should just be sent back," Reiji argues.

"What the hell," I say, very annoyed. "What are you guys talking about? I'm not a product, you can't talk about me like that. I don't even want to be here, so I'll just go!" I can lash at them if I want, but I'm still utterly frightened. I have to leave before I lose it.

I turn around open the door with a shaking hand. To my surprise a girl was right behind it. She has wavy blonde hair and wide pink eyes. No, it can't be. "Yui?" I ask. The whole room starts to spins and it all goes black.

* * *

"Hey," I hear a harsh voice say, startling me awake. I look around, trying to take in the new environment through my hazy vision. I realize I'm on a queen size bed with a deep blue cover that has purple dashes on it. The frame and headrest are a dark brown oak. The walls are gray. There is a single window with blue curtains. There is a matching wardrobe in the far corner and my duffle bag is next to it, its contents spilled out onto the floor. I realize I'm in my pajamas, someone changed me. I sigh, I don't know what they're like, but if they're anything like the Keis, they were going to see me naked at one point or another.

"Hey, don't ignore me!" a guy says to me as he walk towards the bed. As soon as I see him, it all comes flooding back, hitting me like a tidal wave. I must have passed out, but I remember her, Yui. I throw the cover off and try to get up, but I get dizzy and fall back down. The redhead laughs at my failure.

"Ha, don't get up, you stupid girl," he taunts.

"Shut up, uh," I try to recall the name of the red head "Laito?" I say, but it I quickly regretted it. He raises his hand, and I wait for the impact to my face. It never comes, instead he pins me down to the bed by my wrist. I try to push him off with my free hand but he takes that one. Serves me right, trying to pick a fight in this condition.

"Don't associate me with that thing. Your Truly's name is Ayato. Don't ever command me to do anything!" he shouts, tightening his grip. He then licks my neck, making me freeze. No, not this. I don't want this anymore.

"You're so sweet," he says. Soon I feel four sharp objects pierce into me. I yelp in pain. What is this? He's... biting me? No, he can't be...

"A-A-Ayato, y-y-you're a vamp-p-," I stutter, unable to say the word. I remember, the letter I was given, telling me about this place, it said: P.S. The boys there are monstrous. My neck is on fire, tear threaten to escape from my eyes. He stops suck my neck and looks into my teary eyes.

"You're much prettier than Yui. And you're not as flat as her either," he states as he removes one hand from my wrist, now holding both with only one. He moves his free hand to my breast. He massages them over my shirt. "These are the perfect size." As hard as I try to prevent one, a small moan escapes my lips.

The vampire smirks and says, "You like that? Keep those sound coming, they're turning me on." To prove his point, he rubs his erection on my leg.

He stops massaging my breast and pulls up my shirt. "No!" I scream in protest. I try to pull my hands away to cover myself, but his grip too tight. "Don't look!"

He peers down at my exposed skin and his smirk is gone. Covering my stomach as several scars, varying sizes. They were left there my previous owner. Only after a few seconds does he continue his harassment.

"I will love to hear the story behind these," he says has he gentle traces each on. He removes his hands from my wrist. "Keep them down, move and you'll regret it," he threats. I take it seriously, and I keep my hands in place. Surprisingly, he starts planting a trail of kisses on each one of my scars. What in the world?

"I heard that you were previously 'owned' by someone, is this true?" he says in between the kisses. He doesn't need to know, no one needs to. Frustrated that I didn't answer his question, he bit down on one of my large scares. The pleasure turned to pain in the blink of an eye.

"Yes," I whimper, "it's true. Please, I'm begging you, stop this." He removes his teeth, and a trail of blood flows out. He licks it up, and sucks on the wound until the bleeding stops.

"Why would I stop, I can tell you're enjoying this, right?" he says. With that he pulls down my shorts, revealing four more scars, two on each leg. On my inner thigh there was a tattoo reading  _Natsume_ that is beside a simple cherry blossom.

"Your former owner was such a sadist, but I bet you loved every moment of it. You totally strike me as a masochist." I don't want this anymore. The only reason I agreed to coming here is to escape the never ending cycle of pain and sex. I don't want this over again, I don't want Natsume!

He tickles my thighs, giving me another wave of pleasure. In the hallway, I can hear soft footsteps. Yui? I strain my ear to listen, they footsteps are out of sync, there are two people. Before I can pay more attention, I feel his fingers touch my panties. Without thinking I bolt up, pushing him away, and cover myself. "NOOOOOOOOOO!" I scream. All of a sudden, I feel a sharp sting on my cheek and a loud whack. I look up at Ayato, his face filled with rage. The areas where he bit me are now numb, and my left ear rings.

"Please stop, stop, please, Master Kei," I beg. Tears filled my eyes once more. Ayato looks at me with a confused expression.

"Master Kei?" he echoes in confusion. Soon I see Yui in the doorway, behind her is the silent white hair vampire -I'm going to guess that all of the boys are vampires.

The white hair one marches up to Ayato and shoves him into the wall. He holds him against the wall by the neck, choking the redhead. Yui comes running to me. She fixes my clothes and gives me a long hug. I wrap my arms around her, crying into my younger sister's shoulder. Even with my useless left ear I can hear her comforting words.

"It's alright. It's going to be okay, Subaru and Reiji will take care of Ayato later. I'm here, we're together again."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you're enjoying the book, more to come soon :P :)


	3. Master

"Shuu is pretty distant, he just rests all day. Reiji is in charge over mostly everything, because Shuu usually doesn't care. But Shuu, being the eldest, does have the final say in things. Laito and Ayato are pervs, so stay clear. Kanato, well... he is different. Don't make him mad, and don't even think about touching Teddy, his bear. Subaru can be very aggressive, but he is kind heart and will always help," Yui sums up the brothers as we sit on her bed.

After the incident earlier, Yui begged Reiji to let me stay in her room tonight. I didn't want to be a burden to my sister, but the thought of being alone at this place puts me on edge. It's funny having my younger sister stand up for me. When we were younger, I had to beat up the bullies and help her off her feet. She changed in the last four years we've been apart.

She looks around them room and drums her fingers on her knee, a habit I remember clearly. She always did that when she was nervous. It's odd, I haven't seen her in four whole years. She physically changed a bit, taller, thinner, face more shaped. It feels so strange being with her again.

"So, Hikari, what happened after that day?" she asks nervously. I stiffen for a moment, then sigh. That day. The day our paths diverged. I guess if it's now or later, it might as well be now. I take a deep breath.

* * *

Yui and I are flying our kites in the courtyard of the Church. Our blue kites dancing in the wind. We giggle and chat, like the careless thirteen year-olds we are. Our dad is inside with a few men.

When the black car first showed up, we were kind of afraid. Three men got out of the car, each wearing a black suit and maroon tie. Father said it will be okay and not to worry.

Following his instructions, we completely forgot about them as they chatted for about two hours inside. By the time my dad and the men come out, it's sunset. Yui and I are in the middle of a game of 'what would you do?'. One person would give a scenario, the other would explain the what they would do in the current situation. I ask her what she would do if she could fly. She tells me she would take me in her arms and fly to the moon.

We exchange outrageous situations as my dad comes over. He's face is serious, no smile in sight. He ushers me towards him, and I get up and go over to him. He comes up to me and gave me a big hug.

"Hikari, do you love your sister?" he asks me in a very serious tone.

"Of course I do, I will always love her," I response.

"Will you do anything to make sure she is safe?"

"Of course, that's what big sisters do," I say, wonder why he would ask such a question.

He gives me another big hug and whispers, "I love you Hikari. I'm so, so sorry."

Everything else happens so quickly that it is almost one big blur.

My dad walks towards Yui and two men come up to me. Each grabs an arm and starts pulling me to the car. I scream and tug in protest, but they are too strong. I look back and see dad hold Yui back. She is screaming trying to free herself from Father's grip. We are both screaming and crying, calling out for the other.

I'm then shoved into the car, a man sitting on both sides of my. The one that was holding my left arm goes to the front and starts the engine. We speed away from the Church. I punch the man to my right on his chest.

"Go back!" I cry. "Go back, I don't want to go, I want Yui. Don't take me away from her. You can't do this!"

He grabs my fist and twist my arm. I cry out in pain, another tear running down my face.

"Stay quiet or you'll be punished," he says in a stern voice. I nod and he release me. I set on the seat and push my knees up to my chest. I wrap my arms around them. Where are they taking me? Why did I have to leave Yui? What are they going to do to me?

After about thirty minutes, we pull up to a huge iron gate. The driver scans a card and types a code. The gate opens and we drive in. I notice that the gate is the only other opening. Tall, gray brick walls fence the outside of the property, as if it's a jail.

We pull into the driveway of a two story house. It is a grey-blue with black shutters. There is a balcony and few windows that I can see from the front.

We exit the car and the man I punched grabs my wrist, dragging me to the door. He enters another code and unlocks the door with a key. We walk into the greeting area. It has maroon walls with dark brown oak furniture.

We walk up a flight of stair and down a long corridor. I'm then shoved into a bedroom and the door is shut. The room is gigantic. There is a king sized bed in the middle and two night stands. Like the greeting area, the color of the sheets are a maroon. The frame and night stands are black. There is a large dresser in the corner near a window. I sit on the bed for a bit taking in everything that just happened. I need to get out of here.

I walk back to the door and crack it open. The guy from earlier is there, glaring at me. I slowly close it back. Of course the weren't going to just leave me. I want to call out, but the idea seems pointless. I sniffle a bit and wipe my eyes, allowing the tears to leave my face.

I notice two doors in the bedroom. One for the closet the other the bathroom, more than likely. Which one first?

I walk to the door on the right wall. I open it and gaze in. All the air leaves my lungs and my heart stops beating. Instead of clothes and shoes, the walls are covered with whips, ropes, gags, and other unpleasant looking things. I shake my head slowly, not wanting to be here. I turn and to run, but collide into someone. I look up to see a guy.

He looks about sixteen with wet hair that goes past his ears; it's an orangish-brown color. His eyes are ocean blue, no, more like a sapphire- they seems to twinkle. He has a fit body... wait. I turn around after realizing he wasn't wear anything but a towel.

"Are you Mr. Komori's daughter? Yui or Hikari?" he asks, his voice soothing.

"Yes, I'm Hikari," I say softly with my head down, not wanting to look at the occupants of the closest or him. He must have noticed and places a hand on my back and guides me out the area. He opens a drawer and takes out underwear and jeans. I sit on the bed and lower my head as he dresses. My face heats up and I blush intensely.

I never really talked to boys, unless I was fighting them. This is my first time I've seen a shirtless male, besides my dad. The adults from the Church didn't want me having 'boy problems'. Soon I feel the area near me sink in. I look at him and open my mouth to ask a question, but he puts his finger on my lips.

"I know you're upset and have many questions and you may be frightened. I know this is all never confusing and scary, but you will only get answers if you do as I say," he says. I nod in response. "You can ask as many questions as you want, but for every answer, you must remove an article of clothing. Understand?" My face turns pink again. He wants me to strip?! Never have I done such a thing. I feel my stomach twist in nausea. I sigh and nod. I will just ask the most important ones, so I don't need to go full on naked.

"Why was I taken?" I start, standing up slightly pulling at my hair, I nervous habit that I've been cursed with.

"My father signed a contract with your father to have guardianship over one of his daughters for the next four-ish years," he responses. I removing my shoes.

"Why did you do that?"

"To insure your safety."

"Fr-"

"Ahem." I shrug off my black cardigan rolling my eyes. "Don't roll your eyes at me," he snaps, a total personality change. I stiffen by his harsh tone.

"What, or who, are you protecting me from?"

"Threats that may come in the near future." His answers are vague, making this a bit unfair. I remove my denim skirt. All I have on now are my leggings, shirt, and underwear.

"What is going to happen to Yui?"

"How sweet, worries about your sister. I wasn't given any information about what will happen to the girl that stayed." I hesitate pants or shirt? I go with the ladder and add my shirt to the pile of discarded clothes. The guy raise an eyebrow and smirks at my exposed skin and training bra. My face heats up and I move my a over my chest. I need to stop before I lose the pride I have left, but I need answers.

"Who are you?"

"My name is Natsume Kei, but you will call me Master." My eyes widen, Master? Was I sold into slavery or something? He glares at me, and I soon discard my leggings. Standing in my underwear, I look at the floor. "Any more questions?" he says with a smirk. This perv.

"W-What's going to happen to me?" I stutter.

"You will live with me and my brother for about four years. You will obey every command given to you without hesitation. You will follow all rules, no matter how much you hate them. If you fracture a rule, you'll be punished," he says in a serious tone. I gulp, not wanting break our agreement. I remove my bra. I guess there is no going back.

Punishment? The word is scary and hold all kinds of unknown terrors. My mind drifts back to the closet and I feel my heart stop once again. "Are the things in the closest going to be used on me?"

"If you're a bad girl, yes. If you're good, you won't even need to look at them," he smirks as I remove my last piece of clothing. I look at the floor as I feel him taking in my naked body. I squirm in discomfort, my face turning even rosier.

He pats the area of the bed where I was sitting. I sit down and cover myself. "Move your hands," he commands. I do as he says and put my hands to the side. To my surprise he picks me up and puts me between his legs. He then gently rubs my arms and sides. The situation is awkward and embarrassing, yet the motion is comforting.

He slides his arms under mine and starts rubbing my stomach and breast. They are small, but he still massages them, making me feel good. A moan escapes my lips and he starts nibbling on my ear. These motions make me feel good, but I start feeling funny in my private area. I move my hand to touch it and it is wet. I open my eyes, the liquid on my fingers is clear and slimy.

"You're wet already, I barely touched you," he snickers in amusement.

"I-I-I didn't pee! It just, uhhh.." I say, entirely embarrassed. He chuckles.

"I know you didn't. It comes out when you feel good. I'm guessing you don't know about this kind of stuff." He moves his hand to my private. I try to block him, but he slaps my hand lightly. "Don't ever deny me," he hisses. I nod.

"When I tell you something, you respond with 'yes, Master'," he adds.

"Yes, Master," I reply. He smiles and goes back to my private. He rubs it, making me feel even better, and I moan again. "This is your clit, do you like when I rub it?" he ask.

"Yes, Master," I say.

He slides a finger into my and I squirm. He slowly moves it in and out. He adds another, making it a bit painful, but pleasure soon takes over. I let out a pleasure filled cry and arch my back. "Where my fingers are, that's you virgina." He start to make a trail of kisses down my neck.

"You should be happy that you're here. My family can be in danger because of you, but we still take you in. I'm your savior, you're forever in my debt." He took his fingers out and licked them. I wanted to protest and remind him that that place is dirty, but I didn't want to make him mad.

I feel something push against my low back. I turn around and see a bulge in his pants. "What's that?" I ask slightly afraid. He chuckles and puts me on the floor.

He remains on the bed and unzips his jeans. "This is my penis, do they not teach you girls this stuff in school?"

He pulls out his member and I go wide eyed. With a bit of hesitation I touch it. It's hard and stiff. I look up at him, he just raises an eyebrow. He guides my hand up and down his shaft. He soon stops and I take over. It's not very fun for me, but I can tell he likes it. He lets out a small groan. I continue doing until I feel it get slightly bigger. Without warning, his body jerks a bit, and a gooey white substance shot out of it. Some of it landed on my face, but he quickly moved his hands on his shaft.

I look at the liquid. "Is this the same thing I had? It looks different," I question. Instead of is usual chuckle, he started laughing. It is a beautiful laugh, the kind you hear in movies and all the birds start to sing along. I instantly love the laugh, and it's one I want to hear every day.

"No, it's not. This is sperm. It has many different names sperm, cum, seaman," he explained. Copying what he did earlier, I took some off my face with my index finger and placed it in my mouth. His eye grew wide. Ugh, it was tasteless, yet bitter. I wanted to spit it out, but I thought it would be rude. He leans over and gets some tissues from the nightstand and wipe his shaft and hands. He zips back up his jeans.

He stands and picks me up bridal style. He walks into the gigantic bathroom. He slowly lowers me into a tub filled with hot water. I mentally question why the bath was already filled. He then proceeds in cleaning me. He's gentle and kind with my body. When I am done, he takes me out and dried me and carried me to the king sized bed. He takes off his jeans and lays down under the covers with me. I snuggle into his chest and he kiss my forehead. Even though he is a complete stranger, he is so sweet and gentle, well, and pervy.

He seems like a good person, my savior. I don't meet new people often, and when I do I usually don't question their actions. It may sound strange, but I feel safe with him. I enjoy every moment, hoping that it can stay like this forever.

But sadly, like all good things, it must come to an end.


	4. Scarred

The next two years were pure bliss. I shared the room with Natsume. Every day he and Kaname, his twin brother, would leave for school. I stayed home to insure my safety. I would make up the bed and straighten up the room. After that I would go to the music room. I told Natsume some time ago that I was interested in the piano and violin. He hired a private tutor for me to help me learn. Within the first year, I mastered both, and had a great singing voice.  
  
I usually made lunch for Natsume and Kaname. We would eat together and they will tell me about school. Kaname had a girlfriend named Nanami, and would love if I could meet her one day. After lunch I would wash the dishes and go to the study.  
  
Natsume wanted to be a teacher, so he practiced teaching me. He wanted me to be prepared for anything, so I not only took tenth grade work assessments, but French and English. He worked me like a slave when it came to studying.  
  
Besides studying, I never actually felt like a slave. The only reason he insisted that I call him Master, was to make sure I knew my place in this house. That and I figured out within my first year of being here that he is sadist. Only a few times did I have a severe punishment. Once when I refused to have sex and another was when I picked a fight with a guard that insulted me.

 

The main reason I would get in trouble is because I threw a fit. I'm not talking about a tantrum, I went on full out rampages. I would start screaming out of frustration, swearing, maybe even break things. The main reason I would go off was because I was hurt or upset, but I had them since I was a child. Natsume would calm me down and talk to me before punishing me. It was usually just a beating, lecture, and come kind of restriction: no music lessons, I can't go outside, taking away one of my privileges.  
  
Natsume was usually always caring and gentle. He always made sure I was happy and occupied with something. Every though I called him Master and did what he asked, I still felt like an equal, although I could never tell him. When we had sex he never rushed into anything. He took it slow and pleasured me first. Then we'd switch.  
  
Kaname was also nice. The brothers weren't identical twins, but they still looked similar. They shared their eye color and most factual features. Kaname was a bit taller and his hair was black and slightly curly and stopped at his eyes.  
  
Our days were filled with laughter and joy. But this fantasy story turned into a horror film in one night.  
  
Tonight the twins and I decided to walk through the garden. The white rose I planted started to bloom, which the boys thought would be nice to see. The cold November air blows over us, but the but the atmosphere is warm and cheerful. Kaname goes on and on about how epic his eighteenth birthday party is going to be next week. Kaname was born November 17, right before midnight. Natsume was next, but he was born the next day after midnight.  
  
A loud ringing sound brakes the light hearted mood. I'm paralyzed by fear, not knowing what to do. The only thing that was moving was my heart, which was beating at an unhealthy speed.  
  
"That was a gunshot," Kaname states, Natsume nods, agreeing with his brother. Natsume takes my hand and starts running. Kaname is right next to us. We run into the hedge maze and stopped. We all gasp for air.   
  
What was going on? Who shooting a gun? Who would attack us? I remembered how Natsume told me that there may come a day when something like that may happen. I know that we must get in the house and into the safe room.  
  
After a moment I saw a little red light shine on the hedges, it moves slowly until it lands on my. Kaname looks up and yells, "Watch out!"  He jumps and pushes me out the way. Another bang and I hear him scream in agony. Then everything goes silent and slow, as if in slow motion. I see Kaname fall, and a scream. I thinks it’s mine, but I’m not quite sure. I look down at him. He has a hole through his chest, blood gushing about of it. It takes me too long to process what just happened, and only the site of the eldest brother lying on the ground makes everything move properly again.  
  
"Kaname!" I scream. Natsume stares in shock, but soon recovers. He picks up his twin's limb body and continues running. Even with the extra weight, he runs like a cheetah. We make it into the house. Natsume punch in a code on the inside keypad and sirens screech into the night air. Soon all the windows and doors are gated by iron shields.  
  
Natsume lays Kaname's body on the floor. His blue polo shirt is painted red. I don't need to be told. I lean over and close his eyes. Tears start to form in my eyes, soon they run down my face.  
  
"Go to the room," Natsume says. I look at him in surprise.  
  
"No, I can't ju-"  
  
"KNOW YOUR PLACE, I SAID GO TO THE ROOM!" he yells. I get up and run. When he says room, he probably meant the safe room, but I didn’t go downstairs where the room is. But my brain doesn’t register it. I fly into the bedroom I fall onto the bed, sobbing uncontrollably. Kaname just got shot saving me. How stupid am I? I can't even realize I had a fucking target on me. I fall asleep with an aching heart and wet cheeks.  
  


* * *

  
  
I wake up to an empty bed and look around for Natsume. I get off the bed and change into a house dress. Where is he? I go to the bathroom to do my hair and notice the tear streaks and swollen eyes. Last night, the shot, Kaname, everything comes back in a painful swarm. Remembering the event that happened last night make me want to cry all over again, but I have to be strong. I need to go see Natsume and comfort him. I walk into the hallway and see Kaname's bedroom door open. Natsume was sleeping on a chair next to the bed. He also has streaks of dried tears on it. Kaname is clean and lays in bed.  
  
I sniffle and touched his cold hand. Being near him is too much, and I begin to sob. A sharp pain explodes from my cheek, my head is turn due to the force of the blow. I look up to see Natsume. His once gentle eye were filled with hate and are stained red from tears. He scowls at me, baring his teeth like an infuriated animal. I've never seen him like this, which causes me to shake in fear.   
  
"Don't you touch him!" he screams, scaring me even more me. "You're the reason he's dead!"  
  
The statement cause fresh tears to roll down my cheeks and I begin to sob. "Shut up, you fucking baby!" he says kicking me in the stomach. The impact forces all the air out of my lungs. I'm really shaken by his current state. I guess the death of his only sibling pushed him over the edge, I don't blame him.  
  
He grabs a fist full of my long brown hair and drags to our room.  
  
I cry in protest, begging him to stop. Once in our room, he drops my head on the floor, it hits the floor with a loud thud. I sharp pain erupts from my head, my vision slightly blurs. Natsume then ripped off my dress, making me gasp in shock. He marched into the closet. My stomach dropped. No, no anything but this. He came out with a whip. Without a drop of mercy, he started whipping me. The thin leather comes in contact making me scream in pain. One after another, each lash more agonizing than the last. I cried and plead for him to stop, but he never listens. Never had he ever acted like this, hitting me repeatedly with such force.  
  
"You're the reason Kaname died. He saved your slutty ass and now he's dead!" he screamed between lashes. I started bleed where the lashes constantly overlapped. He stop whipping me and went right up to my ear and says in a venomous voice, "I'm going to put you through hell for the next two years. You’re going to wish that you were never born.  After what I'm going to do to you, you'll wish you could've just died and gone to hell."  
  
With that he takes my hair once more and drags me down the hall. We stop right before the stair and he kicks me down.   
  
I black out before I reach the bottom.  
  
Since that day, I stayed in a cell. Every day he abused me. I wanted to die, but he had no mercy left. It was horrifying having the first person you loved be the person you fear most. He put me through endless torment. He would whip me till I passed out, use me as a punching bag, and rape me. Never had sex been so painful. It hurt worse than me losing my virginity on my fifteenth birthday. Something that I use to desire and pleasured me became something I cried about and begged him to stop. His gentle motions became sloppy and painful. He made me deep throat so often and the constants screams made my throat horribly sore. It was like this for eight months.  
  
I thought I was going to die there. My last breathes would be in that cell. I would die with Natsume's sadistic smirk as my last memory. I would never see Yui again. I would die with no one left in the world to miss me.   
  
But that wasn't my faith.   
  
One day I woke you and I was no longer in my cell. I was in a conformable bed. I looked at my body, I was bandaged up, from head to toe. I realized that I was at the Church's private hospital. I was here before, when I broke my ankle at the age of ten.  
  
The doctor told me that I was to stay there for the next six months. Then I would be taken in the hands of one of my Father's most 'trusted' clients. I stayed in the hospital for only five months, though my body wasn't left unscarred. I have two scars on each of my inner thighs and several on my stomach. I went against my doctor's and therapist's wishes and keep the tattoo on my thigh. It was gift from Natsume when he still loved me, and I refuse to part with it. Other than that, I just needed to put on some more weight and excursive.  
  
But that didn't mean I was fine mentally. I had horrible nightmares which made me bolt out of bed screaming. Anytime I saw a man I began to shake. It took a lot of therapy to get me in the mindset of 'not all men are going to hurt me'. I'm still convinced I was the cause of Kaname's death. Everyone says it wasn't my fault, but I know better.  
  
Although I tell me otherwise, the staff thinks that I stayed in that cell for the whole three and a half years. I kept telling them that it wasn't true, that it wasn't always like that. I told them about everything he did for me and what lengths he went to just to keep me happy. I even said that I used to love him. That was the final push. They told me that I had Stockholm syndrome, that I was in love with my kidnapper.  
  
But that was the problem, he wasn't a kidnapper, he and his brother were my saviors. I told them this repeatedly, but they kept saying he 'manipulated' me. By then I gave up. He was a good guy from the day I arrived to the night Kaname died. Rarely did he bring a tear of sadness to my eye before that night.  
  
No matter how many times I asks about her, no one talks about Yui. If I bring it up, the doctor needs silence or it's time for lunch. I was soon discharged and stayed at the Church for a while. After what happened, I stop believing in God. Why would an all powerful being let such horrible things happen? I thought it was a stupid concept. What did Kaname do wrong that was so horrible he died? Was death a punishment, karma, or just bad luck? If it was punishment or karma, God could kiss my ass. Kaname sacrificed himself for a girl that was only loved by two people, but dozens mourned over his death.  
  
For two months I brushed up on my piano and violin. Hear the melodic sound made me sad from time to time, but I soon got over it. To my surprise I still sang well, even though the torture left my throat sore for months. I ate well and run daily to maintain the healthy state a left the hospital.  
  
One day a letter showed up on my bed in the Church's basement. It read:  
  
 _Dear Hikari,_  
  
 _You have been offered a new home at the Sakamaki household. As an apology for the pain you went through at your previous home, I have insured you safety. This family is under oath not to harm you like the Kei family did. You will depart tomorrow night. Please bring all of you belongings with you, I'm not sure if you will be coming back. This is a new start, you have a blank slate._  
  
 _Sincerely,_  
  
 _Father_  
  
 _P.S: These boys there a monstrous, be safe._  
  
His signature brang tears to my eyes. Why should I trust you? You never came to see me or called to check up. You just let the men drag me away without an explanation that day. And after all that, Yui is probably died. I left to save her and she probably met the same fate as Kaname. I hate you Father, you're the monster. I hope you die!  
  
'A blank slate' the letter said. That night I cut my long brown hair so it just reached my shoulders. I don’t know why, but I made a fire that night just to burn the long brown strands. I think it was to let go of the past. Kaname and Natsume both lover my hair. Before the abd days, Natsume used to bread it and make funny hair styles. Once the tournament started, though, he enjoyed using it to yank my head around at will. I pack a small duffle bag the head priest gave me.   
  
The next day I waited outside till 10:30 at night. I went to wait inside. I sat in a chair and rested. Around 11:30 pm a light flooded the room. I walked outside to see a black car. For a second my stomach drop. He's back. I waited for it to happen again, for two macho guards to come out and drag me away. But the driver just honked the horn.   
  
I went to his window. He was a blonde around twenty-five with kind eye. I sported a light blue collar shirt and khakis. Not a suit and maroon tie. I sigh a breath of relief and hopped into the car. We drove out of the driveway and start onto the road.  
  
All I know about my future at this point is that it can only get better.  
  


 


	5. Temptation

By the time I finished telling Yui everything, we both have dried tear streaks on both cheeks. It was a struggle to try and suppress my cries, but when I spoke about Kaname, it made my voice tremble. My sister gazes at me with sorrowful eyes. She leans in and cries on my shoulder.   
  
"I'm sorry," she whispers with a trembling voice. "I didn't even know what happened. I never really asked Father about you after a few months. He just said you were staying with an aunt. When I question him about them men in suits, he would always change the subject. I didn't know you went through such horrible things. I would have gone, I woul-"  
  
"No," I cut her off. "I'm your older sister and I need to protect you. They knew who ever stayed at the Church would truly be safer. No one really knew about it, you were off the grid. They tracked me down. You could have died."  
  
"Who was trying to kill us?"  
  
"Father had a bad history with some people. They threaten to take us from him, so he sent me there."  
  
"So that's one reason why I'm here."  
  
"What was all that talk about being a bride? Are you, like...?"  
  
"No," she says blushing. "Before me, the Church would send girl here for the boys, they were called brides. They all, well, were killed at one point or another." My eyes grow wide at the statement. I went through all that shit just to be killed? My sister seems to notice my distressed state. "Oh, no, no, no, they aren't going to kill us, they were told not to," she explains, waving her hand as if to shoo away the idea. She then yawns and stretches. I look at her clock, it 10:27 am, why is she tired?  
  
"It's time to go to bed," she says yawns one more time. She gets up and walks to her draw and pulls out some pills. "Living with vampires does change your life. These will help you sleep," she says with a half-smile. I pop them in my mouth and she hand me the bottle that was on her nightstand.  
  
She closes the curtains, making the room pitch black. She then moves under her cover and slides to the end. Realizing she wants me to lay with her, I climb in bed. We face each other and she grabs my hand and closes her eyes. Whatever drug she gave me works its magic quickly, and I'm out like a light.  
  
I wake up before Yui. I look at the bedside clock, it’s 8:30 pm. I guess everyone is still asleep. I tip-toe out of bed and down the hall. I walked in silence for a bit and then released I didn't know where the hell I'm going. It's so big I'm sure to get lost eventually. The Kei household wasn't even as big and it took me a while to memorize the rooms.

I wonder if they also have a safe room, there is certainly room for one. Do they have a dungeon also? The thoughts makes me shiver in horror. There was only two cells in the Kei’s house. Natsume told me the house was old and used to hold prisoners before they were transported. The mansion can probably have a whole underground system of cells. I shake my head, that’s ridiculous. Beside, the thought only makes me feel worse.  
  
I come across a flight of stairs and walk down them. After a bit of wandering I make it to the entrance. I look over to the sofa where the Natsume look-alike was, but he is no longer there. Well of course he won’t, I doubt any just hangs around the entrance for no reason. I debate whether to go outside or not. Well, I was never told any rules, so it's free game.  
  
I pull open the heavy oak doors. The fall air feels cool on my body, but not too cold. I walk outside. I look to the right where I first say the figure -which I'm guessing was Yui- walking last night, or was it this morning. Ugh, doesn’t matter. I walk outside with bare feet, not really giving it a second thought.  
  
It's mid-September, the evening sky disappearing, being engulfed by the night sky. I walk into the garden, slightly wincing as I step on to the cool marble walkway. I take in my surrounding. There are lamps stationed in various places none are on, though. There are tall hedges covered with roses. They remind me of the ones I planted at Natsume's house, but these are red. The thought makes me remember the horrible night. I quickly dismiss it, not wanting to cry anymore then I have already.  
  
I follow the path to a marble gazebo where I see him. Subaru, the white haired one that helped me earlier, sits there, back facing me. He is still and silent, like earlier.   
  
I should thank him for saving me early. I bite my lip in hesitation first. After his chivalrous actions from before, I don’t think he is anything like the perverted redhead. Yui said he has a temper though, which scares me a bit. The last thing I want to do is piss someone off, especially if they can blow at any second.  
  


I hold the hem of my blue pajama top and take a deep, silent breath. Its fine, its fine. Even if I did see him slam the Ayato- his name finally coming back to me- into a wall a few hours ago. This is totally fine.

  
I walk towards him and I feel several sharp stabbing pains in the sole of the right foot. I yelp in pain and see the vampire jumps onto his feet. I look down at my own and notice I stepped on a branch from the hedge filled with thorns.  
  
Subaru looks at me and scowls, marching towards me. He comes right up to be. As an automatic reflex, I move my arms over my face and look away squeezing my eyes shut. I wait for the blow but instead he picks me up and cares me to the gazebo.  
  
He sits me down and starts to remove the thorns that have soiled into my feet.  
  
"Th-Thank you, Subaru," I say. "For helping me earlier, uh, and now, I guess." He just grunts in response.  
  
"Baka," he snaps "Why aren't you wearing shoes?" He removes another thorn.  
  
"I, uhhh, don't know where my room is. I didn't want to wander the halls opening random doors. that can only end badly. What if I opened the door and it was that pervert’s room? I know it can only end badly,” I begin to ramble, something I do every time I don’t know what to do or say to someone I first meet. This has happen a few times, me spouting utter nonsense until the other silences me. “I would like to explore the mansion, it's quite big. It's odd, only six boys and a girl, while, two now, live here. Isn’t that ridicl-”

  
“Shut up!” he snaps. I flinch and close my mouth. I touch my shoulder to find my long strands of hair, only to remember I cut it. I reach up to my ear and begin to tug on my brown, wavy strands.

He removes the last thorn and picks me up again. I feel awkward and helpless letting him carry me. I want to protest, but I don't. I will let him carry his act of kindness if he wants. Besides, he already doesn’t like me, I can tell.    
  
Surprisingly, he doesn't just carry me to the door, but up the stairs and down two corridors, which I try my best to memorize. He pushes open the first door to the right and steps in. He puts me down on the bed, and leaves without a word.  
  
I limp to the wardrobe and begin to dig through it. I find some house clothes to put on and go to the bathroom. It wasn't as nice as the one in Natsume's room, but at least I get to use it. I had a corner in my cell that was my bathroom and it was only cleaned once every three weeks. I rarely even bathed.  
  
I start the bath, filling the tub with hot water. I remove my clothes and slide in. It feels good to be in a hot bath after everything that happened. I think back to yesterday -or was it today? - when Ayato came in and started harassing me. It wasn't really harassment, because, sadly, I was enjoying it. It has been so long since I had been pleasured, and the sensation was amazing. The way he kissed stomach and rubbed my breast. I want it. No, it will just end badly. I gasp as I notice that I started masturbating. I frown to myself, come on Hikari, don't start doing this because of some perverted vampire. I move my hands and get out of the bath tub.  
  
I dry off and put on my clothes. I put on a simple black C-cup and zebra printed panties. I wear a yellow, short sleeve shirt that has grey and black stars, circles, and hearts scattered in it. I complete the outfit with a pair of black jeans. I brush my hair and decide to keep it down; I don't want the vampires to get peckish seeing my fully exposed neck.  
  
I'm surprised when I see Ayato sitting on my bed when I open it. I gasp and quickly close it back and turn around to see him looking at me. In defeat I lean on the door and slide down with a sigh.  
  
"What do you want?" I ask in a whiny voice.  
  
"I want to finish where we left off," he said. I debate over what to do: fight back and probably regret it or just go along and maybe get some pleasure out of it. The ladder makes me feel like a slut, but my thoughts from earlier come back.  
  
"Will you leave me alone?" I ask. He almost drops his jaw onto the floor, surprised I'm so compliant. He simply nods. I sigh and get off the floor and walk out of the bathroom and close the bedroom door. I have had this moment with Good Natsume multiple times, when I just didn't feel like having sex. The best thing to do is not to argue and make him cum ASAP. I walk to the bed and take off my shirt and pants with a blank expression, not knowing if he's the kind of perv that gets turned on my nervous girls. He frowned and pushed me down.  
  
He didn't even pin my arms down, he went straight for my lower neck. He licks the spot, compliments about how sweet it is, and bites it. The pain erupts from the spot and I whimper. He releases me from his bite after a moment and stares down at me. He tickled my stomach making me lose my expressionless facade and slightly smiling. He starts to move to my side and I arch my back due to the ticklish movement. During this moment he slips his hands under my back and unclips my bra in a single motion. He then rips it off of me, exposing my breast.  
  
He rubs my breast gently. He then sucks on my right as he gropes my left. He softly bites my nipple making me moan. He sucks on it before alternating. Unable to suppress it, another moan leaves my lips. I can feel him rub his rock hard exertion on my knee. The pleasure is unbearable as I arch my back in pleasure once more.  
  
"A-Ayato, give it to me, please," a voice begs. It takes me a moment to realize that it was my voice. I voice I haven't heard in ages, a lust filled, slutty voice. I bite my lip to trap the voice inside.

He chuckles, lowering himself further down my body. He removes my underwear and looks at my womanhood.  
  
"Hikari, we have to take it slow, but still," he says moving two fingers in me with ease. "I never thought you would be this excited. Well, I did hear you moaning in the bathroom, were you thinking about me?" He takes out his fingers, showing me the evidence of My excitement. His two digits are drenched in my juice. He licks it off his fingers with a moan, turning me on even more.

It's too much, I don't care that's its Ayato, I just want it. I jump off the bed and push him onto the floor. He was about to go crazy, but I quickly started to unzip his pants. I pulled out his member, butterflies flying my stomach. I remember the pleasure and pain Natsume's caused me.  
  
I'm a second away from licking it, but this isn't for him, it's for me. I start to position myself over him. As long as I stay on top, I can make sure he doesn't hurt me. He grabs me and flips us over, pinning me to the floor. Without warning, he plunges it into me. I yelp in pain. I haven't had sex in six months, yet I was ready for it. He moves out slowly and then back in.

"Who knew a slut can be so tight," he groans. I don't reply to the rude comment, I don't even look his way. All I can think about is the pure pleasure that is going through my

He soon picks up the speed, sending me another massive wave of pleasure. I'm soon moaning uncontrollably, enjoying over moment. I wrap my limbs around him, not able to withstand the pleasure. It feels so good I forget everything.  
I forget that u don't know Ayato i forget I have been down this road. I forget that I told myself I would stay away from anything like this. All I remember is how good this can feel.

"Nngh...ah...Ah-Ayato..."  
  
He picks up and puts me on the bed, continuing thrusting his hips without a moment's rest. I feel like I'm going to die from how good it feel. I feel him get bigger, knowing he's at his point. I unwrap my legs and he pulls it out, cumming onto my stomach. He collapses onto my bed, panting. We stay like that for a bit, just panting and looking up and the ceiling.

Disgust soon feels me. What did I just do? I get up and get my scattered clothes, going to the duffle bag to retrieve new panties. I look at Ayato before going into the bathroom. He looks at me and smirks.  
  
"You act like a tough girl, but I can tell. You're crazy for sex. I bet you were ready to ride me back there. I bet that 'Master Kei' guys made you crazy for sex, and now you can't stop," he says with a wicked grin.

I slam the bathroom door, not wanting to hear him. I lean against it and slide down. I look up at the ceiling, vision blurred with fresh tears. He's right. I was going to. I did like it, it was amazing. But never again, I can't fall for his temptations again.  
  
I get off the floor to take another bath.  
  
Around 8:30 Yui come to get me for din-ur breakfast. I was sitting on my bed when she came in, reflecting on everything that has happened in the past twenty-four hours. I just finished unpacking and stuffing my bag under my bed.   
  
"Come on Hikari," she says. "Reiji gets really mad when we're aren't on time for meals. He started doing this about a week before you got here, and I've been late for two. I don't really think you want to miss it on your first day." She grabs my wrist and walks me out of the room. After going down a few halls and down the stairs, we arrive in the dining room. We're the last ones to arrive.  
  
I didn't notice how hungry I was until I see the food. Oatmeal with brown sugar and a side a fruit. The only free seat left is the one between Subaru and Shuu, right across from Yui. I look up at the youngest brother, and he glares down at me. I mouth another 'thank you' but he just rolls his eyes.

Everyone soon begins eating in silence. It is proper table manners to eat without out talking, but the tension is the room is so obvious. I finish my food before everyone, and look around. Ayato glares at me, so does Reiji. So Instead of talking we stare each other down from across the table, got it.

I excuse myself and pick up my dishes. The only other door besides the one I came in from must lead to the kitchen, so I exit through it. I look into the sink, piled with dishes; properly from dinner early. Not having anything better to do, I run the water and start washing dishes.  
  
After washing them all and leaving them to dry, I peek out of the door. No one is left in the dinner room. I sigh in relief. I collect the dishes and wash them also. When I'm completely done I get a water bottle for the road. I head back to the room.

On my way I see Kanato talking to his bear. I want to make my stay here as enjoyable as possible, so I should get the brothers to like me.  
  
"Hi, Kanato," I say with a smile. He looks up from his bear and stares at me. He looking at me with his wide, amethyst eyes makes me feel unconformable.  
  
"Hello, Hikari," he greets in a cold voice. "Can't you see I was talking to Teddy? Are you really that rude you will interrupt our conversation?" he says, clearly annoyed.  
  
"Oh, I'm sorry, I will let you finish your conversation, bye," I say wanting to leave before he gets mad. I try to find Yui's room, wanting to take to her. I knock on the door I believes is her's.

"Yui?" I ask, unsure about opening the door. No response. I walk away from the door, but it soon opens. A pissed out looking Reiji steps into the hallway.  
  
"Oh, I'm sorry, I was looking for Yui's room," I say, about to walk way.  
  
"No, come in, I've been meaning to talk to you," he says walking back into his room. Oh shit, what did I do? Is it because I went outside? Did he hear me and Ayato? I'm I going to be punished? I follow him into his room. I spot an open chair and sit down.  
  
"So, umm, what do want to talk to me about?" I ask in a curious voice. I'm two heartbeats away from pulling at my hair, but I keep my hands to the side.   
  
"I know about what you been through," he starts in a monotonous voice. "I want to assure you that is never going to happen in this household. There are rules you need to follow, though. You will have to become accustom to our lifestyle, no matter of much you dislike it. Starting tomorrow you will be going to school with us. You will be in the same class and the triplets and Yui. When you are here you must stay on the property. We are giving you a place to live and food to eat, so respect and listen to us. You're our supply of blood. We will feed from you when we see fit. You will not deny us and will not argue. Do I make myself clear?"  
  
"Yes," I say with a scared expression.  
  
"You are free to go," he says. With that I bolt out of his room and down the corridor. I then bump right back into Kanato, who I guess stayed in the same spot. I collided into him, making him lose his grip on Teddy and it fell to the floor. I was about to pick up the bear when Yui's words came back to me, 'Don't even think about touching Teddy'. Kanato turns around and slaps me in the face. I'm taken by surprise by the impact.   
  
"How dare you make me drop Teddy!" he screams. "You make him fall and don't even pick him up. Are you stupid?" He yells kicking me in the stomach. The air leaves my lungs as I roll on the floor in agony. He picks up the stupid bear and walks away.  
  
'Not going to treat me like before', huh? That is exactly how the torment started. Fuck these brothers. I need some time to clear my read.  
  
  
  


 


	6. Accidents

How many stairs does this place have? I'm trying to get to the roof, but every time I go up some stairs and down a corridor, I lose my way. I finally reach a flight of stairs that end with a door. I look about the window and see the night sky.

 

I quietly open the door and a cool gust of wind blows onto my face. It is colder than earlier, but I don't mind. When I step out I hear a soft singing voice.

 

The melody is soothing, making me feel a bit happy. I look to the side and see Laito leaning against the rail. Is he the one singing? No way. It's so soft and warm I lean against the door and close my eyes, focusing on the song. I know this song. My tutor taught me it.

 

I softly hum the tune tapping my foot. Without noticing, I start to sing. I lose myself in the song. I don't snap out of it until I hear footsteps coming to me. I open my eyes and see Laito right in front of me. He scares me, making me jump.

 

"Oh, umm, sorry didn't mean to interrupt, I just, umm, got lost in the song. You have a beautiful singing voice," I compliment. Strange it feels like I'm apologizing left and right. He smiles and leans towards me.

 

"Thank you," he coos, leaning in so close I fall. "I have been trying to resist all day, but I can't anymore." With that, he leans down and bites my neck. I yelp, still not use to the pain. He sucks until the blood stop.

 

He moves my sleeve down and bites my shoulder. He pulls down my shirt and bits the skin right above my breast. Without a word pulls off my shirt. I shiver as my exposed skin rests on my cool concrete.

 

He traces each of my six scars with his cold fingertips. The gesture calms me, making me relax. What in the world Hikari, this is no time to relax!

 

“Laito, Laito what are you doing?”

 

"I heard from Ayato that a 'Master Kei' guy gave you these,” he says completely ignoring my question. “How horrible he must have been, harm such a beautiful girl."

 

The statement makes me feel queasy. Did Ayato also tell him about earlier? Wait, if Ayato had to tell him, does that mean they don't know about Natsume? He breaks me from my train of thought when he starts to play with me breast. The action makes me moan, causing Laito to grin.

 

He starts to do it more intensely, turning me on. He then complete discards my bra. His eyes widen when he sees my fully exposed torso. He starts kissing my left as he rubs my right. Then he starts to pinch my nipples making me moan louder. He sucks softly on my right as he slips his hand into my pants, making me gasp.

 

"Keep up those lewd noises, they're turning me one," he moans, taking off my pants. I feel him tracing his finger on my inner thigh. My tattoo!

 

"So I'm guessing this horrible person is Natsume Kei," he says in a flat voice. No, he isn't horrible. He was hurt. He begins tracing the hem of my underwear. Then rubs me through them. He moves them aside and licks me. I arch my back in pleasure, wanting more. He licks up all my juices and enters two fingers in me. I move my hips, wanting more in me. He easily slides in another finger making me go crazy.

 

"Laito, please, stop th-this" I plead with a lewd voice, which doesn’t really help. I hear him unzip his pants. He enters me without hesitation. He is slightly bigger than Ayato, making it take a bit longer to get used to.

 

He continuously thrusting into me, giving me unbelievable pleasure. I wrap my arms around him and sits up. I guess he wants me to take control. Automatically I start moving my hips, trying to get the most pleasure as possible.

 

"Hikari, I-I'm..," he says, pleasure cutting him off. He push me back down and thrust a few more times before pulling completely out. He cums, but it doesn't get on me; it lands on my shirt besides me. We lay there, catching our breath. He gets up and zips up his pants. Before he walks away he drop his jacket on me. I hear the door open and shut.

 

I sit up and almost begin to cry. What's happening to me? Why am I doing this? I had sex with two different people in less than three hours. I'm I really turning into a slut? No, I just was a bit sex hungry, being pleasured for the first time in years can do that to a person, right?

 

I put back on my underwear and pants and look at my shirt and frown. Really Laito? I love this shirt. I find my water bottle and pour the remaining liquid on my shirt to clean it. I then wring it out. I fold it up and put on Laito's jacket. I noticed I sweated off the light makeup I put on to cover the bite marks Ayato gave me. The jacket's slightly big on me, but it beats walking down the halls topless.

 

___________________________

 

Yui's POV

 

I walk the halls searching for Hikari. She wasn't in the kitchen or her room, and I'm started to get worried. What if Ayato is harassing her? What if he...no. I have to get these thoughts about of my head.

 

I pass Kanato's room and hear him say Hikari's name, making me stop dead in my tracks.

 

I knock on the door, hoping she's in there. Wait, no I don't hope she's in there. Kanato's mood swings can get very scary and I don't want Hikari to get caught in the middle of one. I wait in front of the door for a moment before Kanato opens the door.

 

"What do you want?" he asks. I can smell a hint of blood in his breath, my heart starts to pound violently.

 

"Is Hikari in there?" I ask nervously trying to look behind him.

 

"You girls have no manners, trying to look into someone's room," he says annoyed. "I told her if she wanted me to forgive her for making me drop Teddy, she will have to join us for tea." Oh no, this can only end badly.

 

"May I join?" I ask, hoping I will be able to keep Kanato from getting mad at my sister.

 

"I guess," he sighs opening the door fully to allow me to come in. I see Hikari sitting at the table with a napkin to her neck, smiling at me weakly. She is... wearing someone's jacket? Who's? It's too big to be Kanato's. I rush over to her side to see a few other bit marks on her neck.

 

"Joined us for tea?" she jokes. I shake my head at head at the adept to lighten the mood. I sit down, soon followed by Kanato. For the next ten minutes or so we drink tea and listen to Kanato talk to Teddy. Neither one of us dares to take a dessert, knowing it may anger the sweet tooth vampire.

 

"Thank you for letting me join you," I say. I stand up. "I have to go now." I leave and Hikari soon follows.

 

"What happened?" I ask as we walk down the hall to her room.

 

"Well," she starts, "I was looking for your room when I finished washing dishes. I accidentally knocked on Reiji's door and he told me the rules and on the way out I bumped into Kanato and made him drop that stupid bear. He...got mad and I left. Ummmm, then I, accidentally spilled my water on myself and Liato say me with a drenched shirt. He got a little peckish and bit me. Before he left he gave me his jacket. I was going to my room, but then Kanato invited me to his tea party. He said he would forgive me if I went. So when I was there he also felt peckish and took some blood. You saved me, though, I don't know what he would have done if you didn't come in." She finishes, with a half-smile.

 

We reach her room and go our ways; she said she was feeling tired from the blood lose. I told her I understand and left.

 

But something about her story feels off. Laito isn't like that, he wouldn't just give her his jacket. I don't know, maybe he's growing soft, but still.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So what do you think, is Hikari getting a bit slutty or are her actions excusable?
> 
> The song Hikari and Laito were singing is “Days” by Lia, the ending theme song for Mekaku City Actors.


	7. Separated

**Hikari's POV**

This can't be school, it's a joke right? School is where people laugh and joke around. Where the students do cool projects. Kids goof around and piss off the teachers. The girls gossip in groups, boys practices their favorite sports. Where you can join a club and do fun activates. There are dances and festivals. That is what school is, that's what Natsume and Kaname told me. I thought this was going to be the most exciting thing ever, my first time actually going to a school.

But this, this is nothing. The students just sit and take notes, the teacher's lecture in monotonous voices.

Every time I enter a new class, at least one of the triplets are there, but so is Yui. She makes sure I have a corner seat and she sit by my side as if to protect me. It's like that for every class before history, we have separate lunch times sadly.

When she goes to eat, I head to class with Ayato. It makes me feel uneasy just knowing he's the only one I know in this class. He relentless glares and looks doesn't make it any easier for me.

But to make it worse, two boys have been giving me strange looks ever since I introduce myself. I look out of the corner of my eyes and see them whispering to each other, staring at me.

Once it's time for lunch, I bolt out of the room, gripping my bag. I can't endure any more torment. I easily lose myself in the unfamiliar environment, making everything a whole lot worse.

I need to clear my mind. Something to clear my mind, hmmm. I look around the hall. There are dozens of other teenagers that have been attending this school, maybe one of them can help me.

I muster up the courage to ask a student for directions. When I tell him where I want to go, he gives me a puzzled look. He shrugs it off and gives me instructions on how to get there. Before I leave he tells me I shouldn't go there, that someone 'owns' the room. I thank him and leave, not even caring about his last comment. Following his directions, I find myself exactly where I want to be.

I open the door to the music room and peer in, empty. I smile from ear to ear. I walk in and look around at the instruments decorating the room. On the wall to the right hangs string instruments and blackboard. There are benches and long desk, but no single chairs beside the teacher's. There's is a shelf piled with unorganized papers against the wall, behind the desk. There is nothing on the left-hand wall but a couch.

I gaze around to find what I'm looking for, a violin. I pick it off the wall and inspect it. It has collected a bit of dust and the strings are a bit loose. I tweak it a bit to bring it back to its true glory.

I look at the music sheets on the shelf, scattered and unorganized. I try to find something I know, but it's close to impossible to take something off without a pile falling onto the floor. I sigh in frustration and give up. I will just play something off the top of my head.

I grab the violin and find a bow. I take a breath and start to play. My arms take over as I begin the piece. The song is kind of dreary and slow, reflecting my feelings with every sound. I close my eyes, think of every note on my imaginary page.

I imagine myself in the music room playing to Natsume and Kaname, showing them the song my teacher taught me. The wood in my hand and leather under my chin only emphasizes the memory.

I open my eyes and stop immediately. To my surprise, I was playing for an audience. Shuu is in the door look at me, with, can it be, the hint of a smile?

"Finish," he says flatly. I raise the violin back to my chin and place the bow back on the instrument. I begin again, but I stare at him the whole time. Why is he here, the student that gave me directions told me no one comes here. Could it be that Shuu the 'owner' of the music room? Why wasn't I told it was him of all people? I finish the last notes and turn around to put back the instrument.

"What are you doing?" he ask as I set them down.

"Putting it away. Isn't this your music room?" I ask.

"Not necessarily," the blue eyed vampire says, shrugging as he walks across the room. I stiffen as he comes closer to me, but he walks over to the sofa. He lays on the couch and closes his eyes. He opens one and looks at me. "Continue playing," he demands.

I pick the violin up again and begin playing songs off the top of my head, which aren't many. I notice that he scrunches his face when I play something that isn't classical. After about twenty minutes I stop. My chin and arms ache. I sit on one of the long desk and gazes at Shuu.

How can he be so at peace? This crazy world he lives in and he just relaxes all day. I wonder what's going on in his head. I walk over to him and sit by him. His muscles are so relaxed and his chest rises and falls slowly. Without a thought, I move the hair from his closed eyes. What is going on in your head?

You're the only brother I don't have a single clue about. Reiji is the one takes charge, responsible, wants everyone to be in line. Ayato, the kind that thinks they can do anything. I can tell that just based off of the way he refers to himself as Yours Truly, so arrogant. Laito teases people and is a perv. Kanato is childish, gets irradiated easily, and gets mad easily. Subaru is aggressive yet kind hearted. You're just, chill? Why are you so chilled?

"What?" he says staring at me. I jump and back up. Oh crap, he woke up.

"Uhh, nothing," I say.

"Why were you in my face?" he says getting up.

"I was just, ummm-" the chimes cuts me off, saving me from answering. "Oh look there, time for class." Without another word, I grab my bag and hurry out. He was saying something, but I closed the door before I could hear a word. I rush to my last class of the day, Home Ed. Funny class to have right after lunch, but most of the kids in this class don't even bring food.

I know this will be an easy class, I have great cooking and baking skills. Sadly another class without Yui, but Laito and Kanato are here. I'm slightly scared of being with Kanato without Yui, but maybe Laito will find some sympathy in his heart to help if Kanato goes crazy.

Today we had a substitute. According to Laito, there's not cooking when the teacher isn't there. When the teacher talks about the history of some dessert, I think about what happened in the music room.

It was rude of me to leave Shuu like that. He hasn't done anything to upset me since I have arrived. What was I doing? Touching his hair and staring at him like that, what a creep. The real question is, should I go back tomorrow? I seemed welcomed, he didn't care.

Yui's POV

Hikari plagues my thoughts every time I leave her. Is she okay? Did she get lost? Are the brothers helping her? Are they doing something to her? Is she being bullied?

Neither one of us has been to school before. We were taught everything in Church. It took me a while to get used to all the other students here. It's not like going into public where you are around a group of people for a bit and move on, probably never to see them again. But in school you see everyone every day. You remember each other's faces, name, and actions.

I try to clear my mind of 'what if' scenarios and focus on the task at hand. After math I have lunch. Unfortunately, Hikari and I split after that. She goes to history, lunch, Home Ed, and then science. I have lunch, history, science, and then Home Ed. Faith sucks.

During math, I passed a note to Laito asking him to meet me in the library during lunch. He happily accepted.

Lunch started half an hour ago, yet he still not here. I wonder if he's still coming. I give up on him and get up to leave the area. Right before I leave, Laito walks in.

"Are you trying to ditch me, Bitch-chan?" he asks in his creepy tone of voice.

"I was going to go look for you; I thought you stood me up," I explain, returning to the spot I was sitting at the farthest table, Laito follows me. We both take a seat and I begin.

"So, Liato, uhh, how are you?"

"Please, Bitch-chan, save me the small talk. What do you want me for?" he says, not wanting to be here a second longer than he has to be. What's his problem?

"Okay then, what happened with Hikari and you the other day?" His looks at me seriously for a bit and then smiles.

"Why, what did you hear?"

"Hikari just told me you were and bit thirsty and that you gave her your jacket after spilling water on herself," I say nervously. He smiles even bigger and then starts to chuckle. What's so funny? He put his head down and continues laughing to himself. After a bit, he calms down.

"So that's the story she's going with?" he say calm his grin into a small smile.

"Story?"

"You really think that's what happened?" he ask in a sarcastic tone. "No, no, no that is barely the truth. Do you want me to tell you?" He lowering his voice.

I nod, not knowing what to say. He leaned over the table and whispered into my ear, "We fooled around some."

He leans back and rises from his seat. He gave me one last look and winked. "If you know what I mean." is the last thing he said before turning around and walking about the door.

All throughout history Laito gives me mischievous glances, knowing he left me wanting more answers. 'We fooled around some.' His words echo in my head.

No, he doesn't mean...She couldn't have. This wasn't on her, he did it, right? After everything she has been, though, Hikari would never want to have sex with anyone, especially not these creeps. The thought of it sends shivers down my spine. I need to talk to Hikari about this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song Hikari played is a short song called Fiona's Song from a game I used to play a lot.
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iRi9b_-fqn8


	8. Concerned

I wake up earlier than usual today, wanting to be able to talk to Hikari. After school yesterday she seemed out of it. She frequently stared off into space, not aware of her surroundings. When we got home she walked into the fountain. If it hadn't been for Subaru catching her, she would have fallen in and been completely soaked.

With everything that happened in the past few days, I would think it would be odd if she was completely normal. But still. After the fountain incident, she stayed in her room all day. She only came out for dinner, which was silent as always. I tried talking to her, but she said she had a headache and needed some sleep.

I get out of bed and go to the bathroom. After washing my face and brushing my hair, I get dressed in my uniform. When done, I leave my room and head for the kitchen. I hear a chopping sound as I draw nearer. I walk in to see Hikari making breakfast. She notices me and smiles. "Morning,- Yui."

"Good morning," I reply, giving an equally joyful smile. She is chopping fruits and placing them into a bowl."What'cha making?"

"Omelets with a side of fruit, nothing fancy," she says shrugging. I want to talk to her about what Laito said, but I'm not quite sure how. I start to pack a box lunch for later.

"So, how was school yesterday? Did anything happen, you seemed kind of out of it yesterday," I ask. She grabbed an apple and started slicing through it a bit violently.

"It was...fine. When you go to lunch, I'm stuck with Ayato for history. Lunch was..uneventful. Then I have Home Ed with Laito and Kanato. I hope I can persuade them not to bother me with my cooking," she jokes, moving to the strawberries. "I do have science with Laito, just us two. Hope nothing happens."

"Did they bother you?"

"No, not really. As long as they don't try to bite me in school, I'm good," her smile soon faded. "I'm sorry about yesterday, everything is still so new to me, a bit overwhelming. You know, going to school for the first time and all." She looks at me and I nod, unsure where this is going. "Enough about me, how was your day?"

"Nothing special. I have lunch with Kanato and Laito, history with Laito, and Home Ed and science with Ayato." I smile to myself. "I remember the first day of school with them. Ayato made me skip class to make him some takoyaki. The same day he threw me into the pool." I start giggling at the story, how funny it sounds telling someone. It was petrified at the moment, but it was still an event worth remembering. I look up at Hikari to see her staring at me with a slack jaw.

"Are you serious? That's, that's awful, why are you laughing?"

"It's just funny to say aloud," I reply looking down at my feet. She drops the knife and goes to the fridge, probably to get the eggs. After a bit, she is whisking them.

"Hey, Hikari?" I ask nervously.

"Hm?"

"Did something happen between you and Laito?" The whisking stops as soon as the words leave my mouth. I look up to see her looking at the bowl of beaten eggs as if it was the most important thing in the room. She gets a pan from a cupboard. "Hi-"

"Just stop!" she says in a harsh voice. We stay silent for a bit. "I told you that he gave me his jacket when I spilled water on myself and he bit me. Other than that I've only looked at his disgusting face," she says.

"Oh, Laito said-"

"You called Bitch-chan," a new voice, Laito's, said. He appeared in the kitchen doorway looking at us. "Is breakfast almost done? I'm starving," he whines.

"Yes, I just finished," she says. I notice eight plates, each with an omelet and fruit, on the food cart. She takes it and rolls it into the kitchen. We walk in and all the brothers are in a seat, awaiting their food. Hikari places a meal in front of each boy and disappears back into the kitchen. She sports a blank expression as she comes back from the kitchen and sits at the edge of the table by Shuu. We all start eating in an uncomfortable silence. Once done I excuse myself and go to my room. I brush my teeth and have another check in the mirror. I grab my bag and walk to the door.

* * *

"I just don't get her. One day she is talking to me, one-hundred percent comfortable, then there's awkward tension between us. What do you think? You have five brothers, you've had this problem, right?" I ask Subaru. Ever since coming here, I've noticed that I could talk to him about almost anything, under certain conditions. I can't pry or pester him about something constantly. He is usually very violent but is kind to me.

"Give her a bit of time to cool off, I guess," he replies, eating his lunch I made him- mainly to make sure I'm on his good side.

"But you saw her yesterday, she was so out of it that she almost hurt herself."

"Just leave her alone for the day and talk to her after dinner," he says a bit harshly, telling me to drop it. I look up into the night sky. The moon is bright and is sundered by thousands of stars.

Will she be okay if I just 'leave her alone'? I don't want to bother her, but I don't want her to feel alone. After seeing her for the first time in years, I don't want to leave her. Maybe Subaru's right. She is already overwhelmed, me pestering her is just making it worse.

* * *

**Hikari's POV**

How does she know? Did Laito tell her? Why would he? No, the question is, does she know? I know she is concerned, but she really doesn't need to know about that. I don't know if she pities me because of what happened in the past, but that's the last thing I need. If Laito stays quiet, then it can fade away, she won't even remember anything if he did tell her.

I look at Laito who's gazing out the window. How I wish I could just read you vampires' minds, which would make the world so much easier. Wait, no, I don't want to know what goes on in there; the last thing I want to see is your perverted daydreams.

Class is nothing but notes and annoying glares from the triplets. The strange boys from yesterday still give me a few occasional glances. I have come to learn that their names are Haru Akita and Keita Shiba. They both have short, black hair and brown eyes. Haru has a bigger nose and Keita is a bit taller and wears glasses.

Once Yui left for lunch, Ayato and I went to history. I sit at the back of the class. To my surprise, Keita sits by my, and by him is Haru. Ayato is across the room, glaring at me. What did I do? They sat by me. Class begins and the teacher tells us to get in groups of three.

Oh, God, why? I don't know anyone in this class, and I rather die than be in Ayato's group.

"Ummm, uh, Komori-san," I hear a voice say. I look to my right and see Keita facing me. "Do you, uh, want to be in our group?" he asks nodding his head towards his friend.

"Sure," I say, a bit hesitant. He smiles, happy with my reply. We push our desk together, conforming our group. Each group is given a task; ours is to make a timeline about a war of our chose. After agreeing on one, we each start to research the topic.

"Komori-san, may I borrow a pencil?" Haru ask. I give him one without looking up from my book. These boys just give me a weird feeling.

"Just call me Hikari," I state.

He looks up in shock. "Are you sure, that's so in-"

"Yeah, I'm sure. If you want to address my sister as Komori-san or whatever, that's fine. I don't really care for it though." I never liked my last name very much, and I never had a problem with people calling me by my first. I think it's because of Natsume and Kaname, even with the extra title of 'master', I called them by their first names and they reflected the action.

"Uh, okay then," he says, uneasy. "I guess you can call us by ours." I look up from my book and nod at him with a tight smile.

"So, you really are Yui's sister."

"Yeah," I answer.

"How come we never heard of you?"

"I guess Yui never really carried to bring me up. We lived apart for a while."

"Oh, okay," he says surprised. Why is he surprised? He doesn't ask another question for the rest of class. The bell rings and I collect my belongings. Haru hands me back the pencil with a smile. "Nice working with you, see you later," he say walking away with his friend.

I walk out the door and start heading down the halls. I still don't know how to feel about them. They seem kind enough and are hard working. I can tell that Keita is the shyer one. Maybe I can get over this feeling and just see them as classmates, not some creepy students. I won't say friends, I never been really good at making any. I don't think I want to. I don't want to make any bonds that could break any day. Surprisingly I find myself at the music room, I usually have to follow directions to a place multiple times before I could remember where it is.

I peer into the room from the doorway, no Shuu. Maybe he will come back like he did yesterday. I don't want to have another awkward encounter, but I do want to play some more. Hesitantly, I walk in and sit on the piano bench. I open my bag and get the chips Yui gave me for a snack. I sigh, I was so rude to her today and yesterday. I need to make this up to her. I open the bag and start to snack when the door opens. I look up and see Shuu looking right back at me. I turn to gather my things.

"Stay," he says walking towards the couch he was on yesterday. "Why do you try to bolt out as soon as I enter the room?" he ask laying down.

"Don't you want your room to yourself?" I reply.

"If you think I do, why come here in the first place?" he asks, opening a single eye to look at me.

"I, uhh, don't know where else to go."

"You sound like a homeless lady," he jokes, slightly smiling at himself.

"Do you care if I come?"

"No," he says. I sigh in relief, happy I don't need to find a new place. "As long as you play for me when you come," he adds. I look at him. A place for a live concert, seems far, but why? He already listens to, uh, what he listens to, why does he want me to play?

"Urrr, sure," I reply. I look around at the room, manly the shelf. "Can I go through that today, and then I would play for you later."

"Do as you like," he says closing his eye once more. Discarding my empty bag in the trash, I walk over to the shelf. I start removing stacks at a time and go through them. Thankfully all the sheets have the song title at the top of the page with the page numbers.

"So, why do you hang around the music room?" I ask after about fifteen minutes of silence.

"It's quiet and no one comes in here," he replies.

"You like classical music the best, right?"

"Mmhm"

"Do you play?"

"Can I rest in peace?" he says, obviously annoyed. I stop asking questions, not knowing what he may do. To be on the safe side, I try to think of the worst these guys would do to me, to be prepared.

By the time the chimes ring, I finish organizing the whole bottom shelf, only four more left. I get my books and look back at Shuu, who lies still on the sofa.

"I'll be back tomorrow," I inform him, but he gives no reply. I leave the ironically quiet music room without a second glance. I walk to my next class, a new thought coming to my mind with every step. Is it really okay for me to be going there? Does he really not care? Will I be able to learn anything about him?

I arrive at Home Ed right before the tardy bell sounded. I walk and search for an open seat. The only available one is next to Laito. With a sigh, I walk over to him and place my bag under my desk.

"Hello, Hikari," he coos into my ear. I jerk my head from him and move my chair as far away as possible from his, which isn't far. The teacher walks in and apologies for not coming to school yesterday. She says we were going to make macaroons.

I can see Laito's eyes sparkle and his lips turn up. I'm guessing he likes them. After giving each student a different flavor recipe sheet, she tells everyone to get cooking. Without even looking at the recipe, I get started. Macaroons were one of Kaname's favorites, so I know it by heart.

"Whoa, you know what you're doing, Hikari," Laito comments as he watches me with awe. "By the way, I love the breakfast you made today. Speaking about breakfast, what were you and Bitch-chan talk about? I heard my name."

The dreaded topic has once again shown its ugly face. I sigh, knowing I can't put it off forever.

"She was asking about what happened between us the other day." Lowering my voice I say, "Did you tell her?"

He chuckles at my concern. "No, no, no of course not. I just told her the truth, we played around."

"How could you?" I say, raising my voice a bit, a hint of anger in it.

"Don't get like that with me," he says scowling. "You don't want to be punished, do you?" He threatens, knowing it will shut me up. "Besides I'm not the one lying to her. How horrible, her sister lying to her, a shame." This motherfucker, did he really just go there?

I turn my attention to the screaming alarm clock, telling me my cookies are done. Once they cooled I add the cream. As soon as I put the first one down it goes straight into Laito's mouth. Ugh, is he doing this just to make me mad?

"Mmmm, these are delicious, best I've ever had," he complements. He calls Kanato over, who was watching his partner do all the work. He comes and shockingly asks for the one in my hand. I hand it to him and he pops it into his mouth. His eyes grow and you can see him smile slightly.

"Make us some more when we get home," he says with delight. I smile, happy that they are actually happy because of something I did. They eat each one I put on the plate. Thankfully, I was only able to save a handful. I took one to the teacher for my grade. After cleaning up, class was over.

I guess today wasn't as bad as I had predicted, maybe things can change for the better.

When I go to science and realize Laito isn't here. I wonder if he skips class often. Ugh, why do I care?  _You care because you're in a class by yourself, and you don't know anyone._ I sigh and take out my notebook, wanting this class to be over as soon as possible.

* * *

**Yui's POV**

"And then Laito and Kanato starting eating them like animals, it was actually very funny. I thought they were pretty scary, but just give them sweets and they won't hurt me. Laito didn't come to science, I didn't care, though," Hikari says, concluding her story. I took Subaru's advice and waited till after dinner to talk to her, and she was fine.

"I'm happy you had such a good day, better than yesterday for sure," I say.

"Yeah, I'm hoping school will become something I don't dread," she says with a sigh. "Oh, I forgot," she says as she gets up to go to her draw. She pulls out a small plastic bag. She hands it to me and I see open it. Inside are half a dozen macarons.

"I wanted you to taste them," she says with a grin, "I'm going to get some milk." She gets off the bed once again and walks to the door. She opens the door only to see Laito behind it.

"Hello, Hikari, Bitch-chan," he greets, winking at me. "Hikari I'm bored," he whines, "let's play again." He says, talking by her chin and raising my sister's head. Hikari looks at him and her face loses its color.

"Liato, move," she says firmly. That's one strange thing about Hikari I've noticed. She can be very firm and have the 'I'm-not-going-to-take-your-shit' attitude, or is very cautions and flinchy.

"Ooooh, don't hurt me like that, let's have some more fun," he teases. She looks at me and pushes him out the doorway and closes the door behind her. I can hear murmuring in the hallway, then footsteps that soon fade.

What in the world is going on between them? Why is she keeping this from me? After a bit, she comes back with a glasses of milk. She looks tired and she is slightly trembling. What happened? She hands me a glass and sits on the bed.

"I opened the door with my foot if you're wondering," she jokes, trying to kill the awkward silence.

"Hikari, what's going on?" I ask finally, a bit scared what I will get in reply.

"Yui, I didn't want to," she say looking down at the sheets. "I don't want it anymore, but," she bits her lower lip, hesitating," but Liato...he..he ra-ra," she wasn't able to finish her sentence, she didn't need to. She burst into tears right in front of me. I hug her and rub her back, trying to comfort her.  _Laito, how could you? I don't care if you don't know about her past, you can't just rape a girl. I know you're a pervert, but you can't do this to her._ I stay with her until she stops crying.

She lays done and I rub her back until she falls asleep. I eat a few macaroon- god, they're delicious- and drink the milk. I take her milk and pour it down the bathroom sink, not wanting to leave it and it goes bad. I take the glasses to the kitchen and walk to Laito's room. I knock on his door a few times before he answers.

He opens the door inviting me in. I don't feel very comfortable inside the vampires' rooms, I feel like they can do anything to me in here and no one would care. One of Reiji's rules are 'I don't care what you do, as long as you take it to your private room'.

"So what do you need, Bitch-chan?" he coos sitting in a chair.

"I want you to stop hurting Hikari," I say, palms sweating as I speak my words. "She has already been through alot, and you, uhh, sexually harassing her is only making her settling in her even harder." I try to sound as seriously as possible. He raises an eyebrow at my request.

"Well if I don't have Hikari to play with, what am I to do?" he says with a smirk, getting closer to me. I think about his words. He was fine before she was here, so why does he feel like he need to get it on now?

"Can't you figure that out on your own? All I want for you to do is to stop hurting my sister."

"You really love your sister?"

"Of course I do, I will always love her," I response.

"Will you do anything to make sure she is safe?"

"Yes, of course, she has been through enough already."

He leans into me, so close our noses almost touch. He looks into my eyes and I look into his green ones. "Then," he says, "why don't you take her place?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song Hikari played is Jesu, Joy of Man's Desiring by J.S. Bach  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lwINOcFwTjc&index=11&list=PLA4FBF0D489EB3298
> 
> You see what I did there, no? Oh, okay. :( If you do, good job


	9. Tears

**Hikari's POV**

I wake up under my soft covers. I get up to see my empty room. I leave the warm comfort of my bed and notice that I'm in my pajamas. WHAT THE HELL? Did Yui do this? If not, who? Forget it, I don't even care at this point. But, wait, didn't I fall asleep in Yui's bed? Okay, now this is weird. I look at my bedside clock, 5:45 pm. No one should be awake for another hour.

I walk to the bathroom and look in the mirror. The streams of tears stain my cheeks and my hair's a mess. I wash my face and brush my hair and style it in a ponytail. After getting dressed in my uniform, I go downstairs.

I will leave breakfast for Reiji or Yui to make today. I put on my shoes and walk out the door. The early September sun is low in the sky, but not quite sunset. I walk along the hedges, wanting to lose myself. I end up walking to the other side of the mansion, an unfamiliar section of the property.

I find an area where the garden meets a wooded area. There is a trail leading into it, so I follow it. After a couple minutes of walk, I arrive at a small lake. Not having anything better to do I remove my shoes and socks and place my feet in the water. It is a bit cool and a bit dirty, but I don't complain.

After a bit, I hear the rustling of leaves and turn around. Ayato is at the end of the walkway, looking at me with a frown.

"Why are you here?" he ask in a harsh voice.

"I-I-I was just walking in the garden and saw a path," I stutter, "I d-didn't know I wasn't allowed here. Reiji said I can go anywhere on the proper-"

"I don't care what he said, Yours Truly doesn't want anyone over here!" he says walking closer to me. I freeze, paralyzed with fear. Why is he so mad? It's just a lake. "Why are you just sitting here, go away. Do you want to get hit?" he says, raising his hand. My eyes grow wide. No, I don't want to go through this again.

I grab my belongings and run to the path. I don't stop until I reach the end. I collapse on the marble walkway of the garden. I dust the rubble and dirt off my feet as best as I could. I don't want to dirty my socks with my filthy feet, so I stuff them in my shoes and walk the path barefoot. I keep an eye on the trail, not wanting to step on thorns again.

I wander around before I get lost in the maze of hedges.  _Be careful what you wish for, dumbass._ What time is it? Are they eating already? My stomach growls at the thought. I fall to the ground in defeat. Without thinking, I lie down on the marble walkway.

I can just stay here for a while. No one would really care if I don't show up. Maybe Yui would, but that's a maybe, not after last night. I can stay here until everyone leaves for school and then I could find a way to leave. No, that would end badly. Maybe just some time to myself?

"Hey, are you dead," I hear a voice. I look up and see Shuu down the path. I was so lost in my thoughts I didn't even hear him.

"Unfortunately, no," I say with a half-smile.

"If you want to die, we can arrange that," he says with a blank expression. Not knowing if he was serious or was joking. "Come on, Reiji told me to get you, we're waiting for you."

I get up and dust myself off. He starts to walk off and I follow him.

"What about Ayato?"

"He's already there," he says without looking at me. What?! We walk and around multiple corners before we arrive at the front doors. He glances at me and then down to my feet, caked with leaf bits and dirt. He points to the left where I see a water spigot. I walk over to it and wash my feet. I take out my handkerchief and dry my feet before putting on my socks.

Once inside I go to the dining room. Everyone, including Ayato, was already sitting down. I take the open seat between Yui and Shuu. I give Yui a smile, but she only gives me a half smile in response. She has dark circles under her eyes and she looks slightly pale. What happened last night? I look across the table to see Liato smiling at me. I raise an eyebrow and he copies my motion.

"Hey," Haru says, "can we talk to you about something." Nodding his head at his glasses wearing friends. The bell for lunch just rang, and I was planning to go to the music room. Not once did Yui speak to me today nor did Liato harass me. What the hell is going on?

"Ur, sure, but let's make this quick, 'kay?" I reply. He smiles and he gets up. We walk to the courtyard near a tree. Not many students are outside, so it's good to talk in privacy. "So, umm, what do you guys want to talk about?" I ask.

They look at each other and nod as if they're communicating through thoughts.

"So," Keita starts, "I don't really know how to ask, so I'm just going to say it," he takes a deep breath, "Do you know two guys by the names Natsume and Kaname Kei?" The name itself makes me stomach drop. How do they know him? I know for sure the Keis didn't come to this school. What do I say? No, I don't speak.

"The thing we were close friends. He talked about a girl named Hikari a lot. Kaname spoke about a burnette that was living with them. Natsume always shut him up for some reason." I don't know whether I should be touched that Kaname did that or creeped out.

"Yeah," Haru adds, "Natsume and Kaname talked about you a lot. And, well, one day Natsume said that you two died in an accident. After that day, Natsume was really screwed up. His grades started dropping and he became more distant." His name brings tears to my eyes. No this can't be happening.

"The thing was there was never a funeral of anything, we all just took his word," Keita adds, "But you're still alive, is Kaname?" I don't know what to do, they have me in a corner.

"No, he isn't, I'm sorry," I say.

"You have to be joking," Keita says angrily. His friend is visibly getting mad too.

"So you're telling me that Natsume lied?"

"Well, umm-"

"No! Tell you what really happened," he demands. I take a step back until my back is against the tree. He steps closer to me punches the area of the tree right beside my head. I start to tremble in fear. The students around us just stare, none of them wanting to intervene.

"Guys, I'm sorry, I don't-" I say, put was cut off. He grabs the front of my jacket and lifts me up in the air.

"Tell us what happened to Kaname and Natsume!" I close my eyes, waiting for whatever may happen. I hear a loud POW! sound and I'm dropped. I open my eyes to see what happening. Ayato is beating up Haru and Keita. I stare for a moment to try and understand what just happened. I was about to be killed and Ayato came and saved me.

After beating both boys to the ground, he takes my hand and runs. He drags me through the halls until we stop at a door. We catch our breath and walk into the library. No one is in here from where I can see. The vampire takes my hand once more and drags me to the back of the room. He sits on a chair and I rest on the table.

"What the hell was going on?" he ask in a harsh voice, panting.

"I-I-I don't even know. They were asking me about someone and it just turned violent, and, and," I start choking on my words, tears threatening to escape.

"Who?" he asks. I remain silent. "I ask you a question, god dammit, answer me!"

"Kaname and Natsume!" I scream bursting into tears. I cry for a bit, letting it all out. He doesn't comfort me, and I didn't expect him to. Once I finish I wipe the tears. I get up to walk away, but he grabs my wrist.

"I just saved your ass, Melons," he says, "I expect a 'thank you'." Melons? Really, I'm Melons and Yui is Pancake?

"Thank you, Ayato," I turn around a say. I try to walk away but his grip tightness.

"You will have to do better than that. Not only did I save you, but I owe you a smack from earlier today. Plus, I'm probably going to my suspended of beating up though idiots," he says.

"What do you want me to do then?" I ask. A vicious grin spreads across his face.

"Make Yours Truly feel good," he says. No, he doesn't mean...He does. I'm trapped in another corner. Run or listen to him. I do owe him what he wants, he did save me. If it wasn't for him, I may have been really hurt.

"Fine," I say in defeat. He releases my wrist. I turn to has him and get on my knees. With a sigh, I unzip his pants and pull out his shaft. I hold his erection in my hands. I swallow my pride and start to rub it up and down. A small moan come from his lips. As I rub the head, I lick his member from base to tip. I circle the tip before opening my mouth and letting it in. I bob my head up and down his erection. He places a hand on my head to steady my motion. He moans continuously.

If I try to go faster he pushes my head down, making me take in his full length. I keep at it for a couple of minutes until I think he's at his climax. I try to release him, but he pushes my head down. He grunts and releases inside my mouth. I start to panic trying to push off of him. He lets me go and I push myself off. I cough up his load, not wanting to swallow it. Why did he do that? I rub my throat, even though it doesn't hurt. Doing stupid shit just like Natsume.

"What was that for?" I say between coughs.

"I just couldn't stop myself," he says with a smirk. He zips up his pants and leaves me there alone. I take out my handkerchief and wiped my mouth. Why does this keep happening? For the second time, I begin crying.

* * *

**Yui's POV**

Liato leans into me, so close our noses almost touch. He looks into my eyes and I look into his green ones. "Then," he says, "why don't you take her place?"

All the air escapes my lungs and the request. Is it worth it, do I really need to do this? Yes, if it will keep him from hurting Hikari, I will do anything. I gulp and nod my head. His smile grows even wider at my response and he picks me up. He carries me to his bed and drops me on it. He starts at my cheek bone and kiss down my neck. Once at the base he bites into me. The action makes me whimper, but I'm used to it. He sucks until it stops bleeding. He slides the collar of my nightgown down and pieces my skin again.

"Let's get rid of this, shall we?" he say, removing my nightgown. I lay on his bed with my white bra and panties. "Your sister wear such sexy underwear, what a letdown," he says. His cold finger traces the hem of my bra. He pushes it up, revealing my small breast.

"I never really mind small breast, they are still breast," he says as he licks my left and pinches the right. He soon starts to suck it. The mix of pleasure and pain makes me feel weird. He bites down softly on my nipple making me whimper a bit. He then alternates, rubbing my left while he sucks my right. The pleasure caused me to moan slightly. Oh no, why did I do that? He smirks and slowly moves his hand down to my panties. He slides his hands under them. I raise my hand to stop him, but he pins it down with his free one.

"We will have none of that tonight," he says. He lowers himself and removes my underwear completely. I turn away as he looks at my dirty spot. He slides a finger in, causing me to squeeze my eye shut. He enters another, causing a bit of pain.

"Look at this, Bitch-chan," I open my eye to see his two fingers soaked in my juices, "They are completely caked by your dirty juice. So you really are liking this?" He licks my thigh and bits it. I clench my teeth, not wanting him to hear my cries of pain. He starts another trail of kiss and stops at my entrance. He opens me with his fingers and licks. The motion sends me a wave of pleasure. He continues to do that for a bit.

"Bitch-chan, I'm ready," I open my eyes to see his throbbing erection.

"No, no, no, it w-won't fit," I protest. Not listening to, me he positions himself in front of my entrance. He starts to slide himself into me. I wave of pain hit, bringing fresh tears to my eyes. I clench the covers as he slides in further. The tears run down my cheeks and I'm about to tell him to stop, but I remember Hikari. I'm doing this for her, so she won't have to go through this. He pushes his whole member in. He doesn't move for a bit.

"I'm going to move know, Bitch-chan," he says. I don't have enough time to protest, he starts to slowly thrust into me. He grunts, "You're so tight Bitch-chan." The pain is overwhelming. I want to scream, but waking someone and having them come in here wouldn't be worth it. He continues for a few minutes. He pulls out and cums onto my thigh. The pain is now a numb, throbbing feeling. He collapses on the bed beside me, panting

"That was great, Bitch-chan," he says between breaths. After a minute or so he gets up. He looks at my womanhood with wide eyes. "Was that your first time? I thought for sure you and Subaru hit it off by now." Mentioning his brother's name makes me feel even worse. What would he this of this?

Liato is soon between my legs once again. Once more he begins to lick me. I can't feel any pleasure like last time. "You juices plus you sweet blood, I couldn't be happier." What a perv. He disappears into the bathroom and come out and hands me a warm cloth. I use it to wipe myself clean. He leaves once again, into the bathroom. I collect my clothing and put them back on.

I get up and walk to the door. The pain increases as I leave the room and walk down the halls to my bedroom. I collapse onto my bed and begin to cry.

Is it really worth it? Is his going to keep his promise? How long is this going to continue? I try to sleep, but the pain is far greater than my urge to sleep. I look at my clock, 1:37 pm. I close my eyes, this time sleeps takes me.

I wake up with a headache. I try to get out of bed, but my lower abdomen begin to hurt. Last night's events come to me in a rush. Did I really do that? I look over to my clock, 6:13 pm. I sigh and get out of bed. The aching feel doesn't pass. I take a shower and brush my hair. I look at my uniform hanging in my closet. I put it on and walk to Reiji's room, hopefully, he didn't start on breakfast yet. I'm about to knock on the door, but it swings open. Reiji looks down at me and narrows his eyes.

"What do you need?" he ask.

"Uh, can I stay home from school today?" I ask. He raises an eyebrow at my request. "It's just, um, I'm not feeling very well." He sees my hand over my stomach and walks back into the room. Moments later he comes out with a bottle and hands it over to me. "I thought I already gave you one, don't waste them," is all he says before walking away. I look at what he gave me. '

'Menstruation Pain Relief Pills'. My face flushes. I think I'm on my menstrual cycle, how embarrassing. I go back to my room and but the new bottle next to my nearly full one. I take two and pop them in my mouth and drink some water. In a few minutes, the pain starts to numb. Wow, that actually worked. I sigh and collapses on my bed. I think back over today's events.

What am I going to do?


	10. Ruin the Moment

**Hikari's POV**

"Ha, why would I do that for you, Melons?" Ayato asks as we walk to class.

"What if they try to attack me again? I really don't want to beat up for some information," I counter, trying to get him to see through my eyes.

"You can deal with them. I already got out of suspended. Yours Truly is getting detention for you whiny ass," he says with a harsh voice.

"I, uh, I will make you takoyaki," I say, remembering his favorite food. His eyebrows go up from the statement. He doesn't give me a response, just keeps walking. I sigh in defeat, not wanting to argue with this vampire anymore. Haru and Keita left school yesterday after Ayato beat the crap out of them. I don't know if they are going to come after me for revenge or what, but I really don't want that.

We walk into class and I gaze around the room, no sign of either Haru or Keita. I sigh a breath of relief and walk to the back of the class. As I sit down and get out my notebook, I notice Ayato sitting next to me.

"They aren't here ya'know?"

"Shut up, you're the one that was whining for me to sit next to you," he says, prompting his feet onto the desk. I guess he really does want that takoyaki. Class starts and I finish up the project by myself. I occasionally look over at Ayato, who does little to no work at all. When class ends, I head to the music room. After a bit of walking, I notice Ayato is following me.

"Uh, Ayato, you don't have to follow me everywhere," I say, immediately regretting asking the favor. Be careful what you wish for, right? I really don't want him to know I go to the music room. That is one place I can feel comfortable, knowing that no one but Shuu will be there. I haven't even told Yui about it yet.

"You said that you wanted me to 'protect you'," he says with a smirk. I get it know, he just wants to bother me at this point.

"I just meant in class, I thought they would start pestering me. They weren't there, so it doesn't matter," I explain. "I really do appreciate it, I promise to make your food later, 'kay?" He grunts and leaves. I stay there for a bit, making sure he doesn't come back to bother me.

I make it to the music room in about three minutes. I open the door to see Shuu in his usual spot.

"Well, you're here earlier than usually," I comment. He doesn't give me a response, I'm not surprised. I open my bag and take out a container of fruit. I eat my snack and get ready for some more organizing. I look to the shelf to see all the papers neatly organized, even the ones I didn't do.

"Shuu, did you organize the shelf?" I ask, flabbergasted. I didn't know he actually did work. I look over to him, but he doesn't answer. He probably just wanted me to hurry up and play. I go over to the shelf and look through the ones I know and select one. I place the music sheet on the stand and grab the violin and bow. I begin to play the piece.

It isn't a sad one like last time, it is actually one I really enjoy. After familiarizing myself with the piece, I close my eyes. I imagine myself playing in a spring meadows. The beautiful blue sky with birds flying and the grass painted with bright colored flowers.

I smile as I finish the solo and lower my instrument. I rub my neck and look over to Shuu, still expressionless. I walk over to him and hear him breathing softly. He fell asleep on my?! I only played for a few minutes and he's sleeping.

I look at the wall clock and notice that I have five more minutes before lunch is over. If he is sleeping then there is no reason for me to play. I walk back over to the piano and get my bag. I take out my book and begin reading.

When I lived with Natsume I didn't have much to entertain me. I didn't have a phone, friends, or anything that can connect me to the outside world. So I took up playing the piano and violin. When I became bored with them, I would go to the library and read my day away. I became very fond of books, reading and completing multiple novels on a weekly basis. The bell soon rang and I put my stuff away.

"Hey," I hear Shuu say. I look behind me to see him getting up. "Why didn't you come yesterday?"

What? Was he worried? No, he may just be upset he didn't have his live music.

"Somethings just came up and I was caught in the middle of them," I say. He narrows his eyes at me as if to ask if I'm lying. I'm really not, I'm just not telling the whole truth.

"Whatever then," he says lying back down. "If you're going to stay in here, you have to play, no reading." What the heck?! Wasn't he sleeping? I nod my head and leave him.

* * *

**Yui's POV**

"Can you at least do some work, this is our last day to work on it," I ask Laito, who has contributed little work to our history project. Out of all people to be in a group it had to be the vampire that does nothing.

"It's all right, Bitch-chan," he says, "I fully trust you to get us a perfect grade." I lean back in his chair and closes his eyes. I sigh in frustration. Every since last night, Laito has been clinging to me. I know I took Hikari's place, but I know he didn't act like this around her.

I continue to work on the project, trying not to think about Hikari. Laito probably wasn't satisfied with my response. He lowers his chair and moves as close as possible to me.

"Oh, Bitch-chan, are you mad at me?" he ask, pretending to be hurt. I try to ignore him, not wanting him to see me upset. He moves his hand onto my thigh. The motion makes me jump, causing him to smirk in delight. He starts to rub it slowly.

"Stop that Laito," I say. "I don't want anyone to see."

"'You don't want anyone to see'? That means that you don't mind me doing it," he says, his smile widening. "Besides, we're in the back of the class, no one will see us." He moves his hand under my skirt.

"Please, just stop," I beg.

"I can tell you're loving it, though," he says moving his hand up, tracing my underwear. "Just like last night," He whispers into my ear.

The comment was the last straw. I stand up immediately, causing multiple students to look at me.

"I'm going to the restroom, Sensei," I say, bolting out of the room before she gives me a response.

I rush to the farthest restroom and collapse in a stall.  _Why does he keep toying with me like this? Even before we made our deal, he was like this, just slightly toned down. Did this deal just give him a reason to be a perv? The deal was I take Hikari's place, not I get to be his plaything_. I take a deep breath and leave restroom after washing my face.

As I walk down the hall, I hear two girls chattering. As I pass I hear one of them mention Hikari. I stop dead in my tracks. "Sorry to intrude," I say to the two students. "But I heard you mention my sister. Did something happen?"

"You didn't hear about the fight yesterday?" The taller one ask. Fight? She was in a fight!? I shake my head. "Well," she continued, "yesterday during lunch Hikari were talking to two boys from her class."

"I heard they were Haru and Keita," the other added.

"Anyways," the other said, "Things got violent and one of them pinned her against the tree in the courtyard. They would have totally massacred her if one of the Sakamakis didn't save her." My stomach fell to the ground. Who would want to hurt Hikari? What did she do to them?

"I heard that it was Ayato," her friend says. "Don't you stay with them? How do you not know?"

I thank them and leave, not answering her question. I walk back to class with questions fogging my mind. Why did they attack her? Why did she keep this from me? What happened after? Maybe she was going to tell me, but then the issue with Laito came up.

I ponder over everything and have no clue what's going on by the time I reach the classroom. I walk in to see that Laito has disappeared. I sigh a breath of relief and go to finish the project.

Laito wasn't back by the end of class, causing me to wonder where he could have gone. He does skip class often, but he usually doesn't leave his stuff. Why do I care? I turn my work into the teacher and leave to my next class.

Remembering that Ayato and I take science together, I quicken my steps. I can ask him about the fight. I reach the class and see him sitting in his usual seat. I walk over to him and sit the desk to his right.

"What do you want, Pancake?" he ask with a glare.

"I want to talk to you about yesterday," I say sternly, wanting him to take me as seriously as possible. He raises an eyebrow at my request.

"What about it?"

"I heard that there was a fight and that you and Hikari were involved in some way."

"Why are you asking me? Why not Melons?" Melons? Oh please don't tell me he means Hikari. I think about his question for a moment. Why aren't I discussing this with Hikari?  _Because she lied to me already, she is untrustworthy._  I shake my head at the thought _._

"Because I need to know now and I don't see Hikari until we leave school," I counter, raising my voice a bit. He narrows his eyes at me.

"Don't raise your voice at Yours Truly," he demands

"Sorry. It's just, I'm really worried," I say looking down. He sighs in frustration.

"Yesterday theses boys were trying to bully information out of her. Things took a bad turn and I stopped them before her blood was wasted on the ground," he says.

"'Information'? What would they want to know about?"

"Stop bugging me, Pancakes," he says through gritted teeth. I stop prying, not wanting him to get any more upset than he already is. The tardy bell ring and the rest of the students take their seats.

I don't even bother to pay attention in class, there is too much on my mind and I'm not going to add atoms to the list.

* * *

 

"I'm not quite sure," I tell Hikari for the hundredth time. "What's with the sudden interest in Shuu?" I ask. Once we arrive at the mansion, Hikari started to rapidly fire question me about Shuu.

"I just want to know a few things about him. He just so, strange" she says with a shrug. There is a difference from wanting to know a bit about someone and wanting to know random information.

"That doesn't matter," she says, waving her hand. She then takes my hand in hers. "I haven't been being a good sister. I have been ditching you and pushing you away, and I'm sorry. So, you are going to spend the rest of the day, err, night with me." She grinning from ear to ear. "We are going to do work and talk about our day and just do random things."

Where did this sudden urge to hang out come from? Well, I'm not mad, maybe she is going to tell me about yesterday.

"Sure," I say, "Let me go get my stuff from my room." I get off her bed and walk to the door. I turn around before walking out and look at my sister. She looks at me and smiles. I race down the halls to go to my room. I open the door and see Laito on my bed.

"Laito," I gasp in surprise. "What are you doing in my room?"

"I was bored and wanted some company," he coos. I grab my bag by the door and put on a stern face.

"Laito, please leave my room, I don't have time for this," I say leaving the room. I turn to go down the hall, but the red hair vampire is standing there leaning against the wall.

"Oh, Bitch-chan, you've been hurting me all day. What are you made of ice?" he says, pinning me to the wall. "If that's the case, I can make you melt." He makes his point by leaning closer and sliding a hand into my shorts.

"Stop this," I plead, trying to push him off, failing. He licks my collarbone and I prepare myself for the bite.

"Laito," I hear a voice say. I look over to see Reiji glaring at his brother. "If you are going to do such things, take it to your private room."

"Oh, Reiji, you ruined the moment," he says, removing his hands and walking away. "Maybe later, Bitch-chan," he says with a wink and wave of his hand.

"Thank you, Reiji," I say, picking my bag back up. I bolt down the hall to Hikari's room. She is waiting on the floor with her books spread out.

"Ready?" she asks, I nod in response. We do our work together for the next few hours. We laugh and joke around like sisters should. She never brings up yesterday's events, but I don't mention them. I don't want to ruin the moment.


	11. Misunderstanding

**Hikari's POV**

"What's wrong, Master? You seem upset," I say, falling onto the bed next to Natsume.

"I'm just a bit stressed, that's all," he says looking down at me, his sapphire blue eyes fogged with sleep, dark circles under them. I know he is more than just stressed, he's completely exhausted. I woke up in the middle of the night to see him typing vigorously his laptop. And when I woke up in the morning he was passed out, laptop still on his lap.

"What's making you so stressed?"

"My dad is away in America for business and Kaname and I have to do a few things for him. And when I say a few, I mean half a dozen assessments that are due in two weeks that he completes in a month," he says flipping through the papers in a binder in front of him. All the work would be overwhelming to any almost eighteen-year-old, but I know Natsume and Kaname can handle it.

"Is there anything I can help you with?"

"Sorry Hikari, but I don't think so." I frown in disappointment. I'm never able to be useful at times like this, when they twins need it the most. My caretaker looks down at my dejected expression. "You know, I'm starving. Would you mind making me a sandwich?"

My eyes gleam in happiness. I nod my head and jump off the bed. Sandwich making isn't that big, but it's something. Besides, you can't work on an empty stomach or you won't get any work down. I go to the kitchen and get the ingredients for the sandwiches. When I'm in here I might as well make Kaname one also.

It take me no more than ten minutes to make the three sandwich. I place the plate on a tray and get three bottles and a cup of ice, also placing them on the tray. I make my way up the stairs, holding the tray by the handles. I go over to Kaname's room first. Having both hands occupied, I extend my foot and kick the door lightly. "Master Kaname?"

I hear some shuffling. "Come in," he muses.

I take a step back raise my foot. I grip the knob with my toes and open the door. I never told the brothers about the trick of opening the doors with my feet, it's an odd action that I rather not share. I turn and push the door open with my hip.

Unlike his brother, Kaname lays on his bed, nose deep into an American novel. Out of all things, his love for American work is the strongest. I believed it was because of his mother, who came from the country. He especially loves reading. He is the one who encouraged me to spend my days with a book. He brings me new stories regular, mostly ones he has already read. When he isn't busy, we would discuss about story.

"Should you really be reading right now?"

"Any time is a good time to read," he says, eyes not leaving the pages.

"Do you have a moment to eat, or is it just getting to the good part?" He quickly gives the tray a glance, but looks right back into his book.

"Hm, I don't know, the first murder just occurred, well I'm thinking it's murder. The girl was hung so everyone thinks she committed suicide, but I don't think so."

"Oh, okay. I guess I'm just going to give Natsume your tuna sub with extra pickles and cucumbers," I tease with a devilish smile. He looks up from his book and gives the tray a proper look, his sandwich nicely displayed on the tray, begging to be eaten.

"Well, I guess I can put the book down, it seems kinda obvious that the murderer is the narrator's crush." He places the book in his nightstand drawer with a shrug. I smile knowing I was able to get to him. I place the tray down and hand him his plate and water bottle.

"What's this one about?"

"A group of ten teens staying on an island by themselves for the weekend. No internet, no phone service, nothing. It's the generic setup for a murder novel," he explains as he chews his meal hungrily.

"I know you like to read," a complete understatement, "but shouldn't you be doing your assessments form your dad? If it's true and you are going to take over the company one day, you're going to have to start acting like a businessman."

"Okay, okay, God, didn't think you would be the one lecturing me about life choices." He playfully rolls his eyes.

"I'm just saying."

"Yeah, yeah, I know."

"Well, I'm going to head back to Master Natsume, who is actually working very diligently." I grab the tray once more and head for the door.

"Thanks for the food, Hikari. Man, you are a goddamn angel."

I blush a bit from the comment; Kaname is always so sweet. "No problem."

"Oh yeah, Hikari." I turn to face the oldest brother, who gives me one of his killer smiles. "Don't let my brother work too hard now."

I smile and nod back. I walk out the door, and since the tray is lighter with one less plate and bottle, I hold the large dish in one hand and close Kaname's door. I walk down the hall to Natsume's room. I push the door open and enter the room.

"I'm back," I state placing the tray on my nightstand. Natsume nods and mumbles a 'thank you' without even looking up. I lower myself onto the bed, the mattress sinking under my weight. "Aren't you going to eat?"

"In a moment." Natsume's tired eyes race over line after line of the documents. I lower myself onto his lap and look up at his tired face. He's been pushing himself so hard these days, juggling school, his father's work, and maintaining some kind of social life. And after all of that he still makes time for me. My chest aches as I think about everything he's been going through. Natsume's words ring in my ears,  _don't let my brother work too hard_.

"Do you want to take a break?" I say. He shakes his head, eyes still scanning the papers. I move my head from his lap to on top of a single leg. I then start to trace his crotch with my pointer finger. His pants begin to to tighten between his legs. I start rubbing him through his pants and look back up to him. He is no longer studying the reports, but looking down at me with a raised eyebrow.

"You're the one you said you're stressed," I say mockingly. "I'm just trying to relieve some." He chuckles his perfect chuckle and places the binder on the his night stand. I sit up with a smile, knowing I've won the battle.

He scoots closes and leans in for a kiss. We kiss passionately, like two lovers. He licks my lower lip and I allow him to enter my mouth. His tongue explores my mouth in the fullest. I fall back onto the bed and he stays on top.

He removes my shirt and kiss me again. He starts to plant a trail of kiss from my jaw to my ear. He then goes done to my neck and lightly begins to suck the skin. I let out a soft moan.

He smiles and moves down to my breast. He removes my bra and starts to grope my breast. A moan escapes my lips as he sucks on one. He moves his hand to the neglected one, rubbing my nipple until it becomes erect. He softly pinches it, making me gasp. I run my hand through his wavy hair as he pleasures me. While softly biting my nipple, he slides a hand into my shorts. He rubs me through my panties, causing me to moan more.

"Master, p-please don't tease me," I beg.

"Now you know how I felt," he says grinning. He slowly pulls off my shorts and panties. He teases me clint, making me buckle my hips for me. He slides two fingers in me with ease. He pushes them in and out constantly, making me squirm under the pleasure. I move my hips to the motion of his fingers, wanting as much pleasure as possible. I feel his fingers leave me, taking away the erotic sensation.

"Why did you stop, Master?" I say with a pout.

"You're the only one feeling good," he says with a smirk. I get up and lay on top of him and kiss him again. My hands trail down to the hem of his shirt. I tug it over his head and gaze down at his exposed torso.

I outline his muscles with my fingers. He isn't bulky like some body builder, but his muscles are definitely noticeable. I then leave a trail of kisses down his abs and kiss throbbing his crotch trapped by his pants. I think about rubbing him through his pants, but decide not to, he doesn't seem like he wants anymore teasing. I remove his pants and shorts, exposing his rock hard erection.

I take it in my hands and start to rub it like he taught me. I rub from his base to his head. I hear him let out a sigh as pre-cum begins to leak from his head. I tuck my long brown hair behind my ears and lick his member. My tongue travels from from the base of the shaft and suck on his head.

I circle my tongue around his member, and he lets out a groin, which only turns me on more. I suck his tip before fully taking it in. I bob my head up and down his shaft and use my hands to cover the rest that isn't in my mouth. He laces his fingers in my hair, guiding me when needed. I then engulf his whole member until it hits the back of my throat. Natsume sits up and raises my chin, looking down into my pink eyes.

"Are you ready?" he asks.

"Yes, Master," I whispers. He lowers me down onto the bed. I hear him open the nightstand drawer and rip open a condom. I steady my breath as I feel him touch my entrance.

He slowly enters me and a bit of pain surges through my body. It has been about two months since I've lost my virginity, yet we've only done it about one other time.

He then pushes his full shaft into me. I clench my teeth as I take a handful of the sheets. He lightly touches my cheek and I open my eyes, a single tear escapes. He wipes the tear and kisses my forehead.

He slowly begins to thrust his hips. The plain numb and is taken over by pleasure. I moan as he quickens his movements. I wrap my arms around him, unable to take so much pleasure. He continuously thrusts into as I feel myself reach my climax.

"Master..ah..ngh...I-I," I'm unable to finish my sentence as a wave as pleasure interrupts me. Natsume grunts and I feel his load enter me. I tighten my arms around him as I reach my climax. I hold onto him as I feel him release his final drops. I slowly loosen my grip on him as he pulls out.

He pulls out and throws the condom in the bedside trash. We lay there catching our breaths. I cuddle up to him and kiss his cheek.

"Feel less stressed?" I asked. He nods and kisses my forehead. After a few moments of laying with him I get up and start to put my clothes back on. "See, I can help you with stuff like this." He smiles at me as he leans over and grabs his sandwich from the nightstand.

"Thank you, I feel better now."

"I still don't think that your dad is being fair. You two are still just eighteen." I take my sandwich also begin to eat.

"I'm not eighteen yet, I'm going to be in November," he response.

The feeling and scenery changes faster than the blink of an eye. I'm no longer sitting on the plush, king size bed. I sit naked on a cold, hard cell floor. My body is covered with filth, bruises, and cuts. I sit with my arms around my legs, hands and feet chained together.

I hear the door at the end of the basement open, and I start to shake. I hear his footsteps become louder as he walks closer to my cell. I squeeze my eyes close and tuck my head in further when I hear him unlocking the cell door. I take a breath in, preparing for what's to come today. I look up at him, and to my surprise he has a box in his hand.

"H-H-Hello, M-Mas-ster," I say in a shaken voice. Even though I have been down here for almost a year, I still try to hold onto the hope that one day it will all end. That my 'hello' or smile before tournament will ease his heart a bit, to make him realize the horrible things he has been doing. I know this isn't him, I want to rid the demon that has possessed his body.

"Do you know what day it is?" he asks in a cold voice, not replying to my greeting.

"I'm sorry, but I don't, Master," I say in an apologetic voice. My lack of knowledge upsets him and he kicks me in side. I whimper as tears start to form in my eyes. He constantly kicks that spots, causing the never-to-fade bruise to shoot a wave of pain threw my body.

"I shall give you a hint," he says with a twisted smile, "It was the day you showed your true slutty nature."

What the fuck, what kind of hint? I look up to him, and he scowls down on my. If I don't answer this quick enough, he'll get angry.

My true slutty nature. I try to pick apart the strange riddle. Sluts are known to seduce people and having sex. I have never 'seduced' anyone to that's out of the picture. Sex. I've done sexual since I first arrived, but sex itself. The day I first had sex, the day I lost my virginity. It was my fifteenth birthday..

"Is it June 26, my birthday?"

"Sadly, yes. The day a woman finally finished her months of suffering to bring you into this world. You, a horrible, no good, slutty, piece of shit. A waste of life." He grabbing a fist full of my hair and pulling me up. I cry out in pain and beg for him to stop.

He frowns and slaps my face with his free hand and drops me. I grunt when I hit the stone hard floor. He then works on my chains. He unlocks the chain from each together and connect them to the ones on the wall. I'm shackled to the wall in an 'X' shape with my head hanging low. He goes to the box and open in. He then pulls out a short red candle and lighter.

"You're sixteen now, am I mistaken?" he says lifting his eyebrow. I shake my head and his face becomes enraged. He goes to the wall where his whips, gags, and other things are. He take down a leather whip. I try to apologies, but the leather hits my skin before I could say a sound. I strikes me fifteen more times, making me cry out in pain with each one.

"I'm s-sorry, M-Master, p-p-please forgive me," I say sobbing.

"Why are you apologizing?"

"Because I didn't answer you verbally."

"Remember that," he says, but his scowl fades. "But let's not be upset. I have something for you." He picks back up the candle and lighter and lights the candles. He walks closer to me. My eyes grow wide as I release what he is going to do.

"M-Master, please don't do thi-" I'm cut off by the pain of hot wax lands on my thigh. I howler in pain as blobs of melting wax come in contact with my bruised skin.

I cry and beg for him to stop. I try to move away from the burning wax, but the chains only give me so much room. My cries are met with his wicked grin. After what feels like a century, the candle has completely melted. My body is caked in dried wax. Tear tracks stain my cheeks and my nose is running. I look down and sigh, it's over.

"Why do you look so relieved?" he says walking into the box. He tips it over and several different colored candles spill out. "We still have fifteen more candles. Sixteenth birthday, sixteen candles," he says as he picks up a light blue one and lights it.

"No," I whisper. I pull on the chains, as if to break them the wall and run.

"No more please," I cry as he walks closer to me, his cruel grin growing wider than ever before.

* * *

I bolt out of bed screaming. I look around to see myself in a pitch black room. I wrap my arms around my legs. I rock back and forth, thinking about the dream. No nightmare. Or was it?

I remember him and me on the bed, messing around. But my sixteenth birthday felt all too real. I rub my legs and arms, no wax. The memories cause me to start crying into my legs. The memories of him and me acting like lovers hurts far more than those of my torment.

I feel a hand touch me and a flinch and scream, "Please, no more Master." I shut my eyes and raise my arms for protection.

"Hikari, it's me, Yui," I hear my sister say. I open my eyes to see Yui standing there with a worried look in her eyes. She is breathing heavily, as if she was running. I launch onto her and begin to cry into her shirt. She rubs my back and sits on my bed. "It's alright," she says smoothly into my ear. "It was just a bad dream. He isn't here, he can't hurt you."

I open my eyes and look over to her shoulder. Through teary eyes I see a figure standing in the doorway. I'm about to ask Yui who it is, but they leave. I sit up and whip the tears from my eyes.

"I-I-I'm fine now," I say between sniffles. I get back under my covers and lay back down. Yui is about to leave and I say, "May you please s-stay with me?"

She smiles at my childish request. She gets under the covers with me and lays down. Us holding hands and birds chirping outside is the last things I remember before falling asleep.

* * *

"Yui, I swear I'm fine," I say guiding her to the door. "I appreciate everything you did for me, but I'm fine know." She walks out the room with a concerned look on her face.

"Are you sure," she says.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I'll see you at breakfast, 'kay?" I say. She nods and I close the door. I lean against the door for a bit, listening to her fading footsteps.

I look around my room. The bed, dresser, night stand, this is my room. I'm not in a cell or on Natsume's bed. He can't get me, he is no longer in my life. The words do hurt a bit, but I need to get over him.

I change from my pajamas into my house clothes; a black top and zig-zag pattern skirt. I brush my hair and walk out of the room, ready to face the day.

I walk into the dining room to see everyone eyeing me. The seven pairs of eyes burning holes into me. I walk and sit next to Yui and across from Ayato.

We all begin eating in silence. I get glares from manly Reiji today, but Shuu refuses to look at me. I eat quickly, not wanting to stay in the room any longer than I have to. I excuse myself and leave the dining room.

I walk the hall for a bit until I reach the greeting area. I see the chair I first saw Shuu in. I walk over to it and lay down.

 _Where do I go in this house?_  Laito is probably going to go onto the roof, the lake is of limits, and there is nothing interesting about the garden. Wondering around the mansion doesn't seem very fun and there is nothing to do in my room.

I rise from the seat and start to walk to my room. I need to find something to do besides loiter around. I get to my room and plop onto my bed. When I fall I hear a crinkling noise. Out of curiosity, I begin to pull down the sheets on my bed.

Between my comforter and sheet is a piece of paper. I pick it up and realize that it is the map of the mansion Yui sketched for me. I study the crumpled paper in my hand.

It has the boys' rooms, gathering places, and other things, but some squares are left blank. I then begin searching for the second piece she gave me, the one for the first floor. I find it farther into my cover and look over it. On the square that say 'kitchen' there is a star. I look at the bottom to see a note a left: takoyaki & macaroons.

I slap my head in frustration, I totally forgot about making the triplet's food. Well, at least I have something to do. I take the papers, fold, and stuff them into my shirt pocket as make my way to the kitchen.

I peer into the kitchen, make sure no one is in there. I begin to simultaneously work on the snacks. As I scavenge the kitchen for the ingredients, I find a wine cupboard. There are three bottles of red wine in it. The only people in this house that I can see drinking wine is Reiji and Shuu, and maybe me. I've had wine before, when I lived with Natsume. Although the legal age to drink is twenty, the twins have been chugging it since they were seventeen. I have occasionally taken a sip at it, although I've never had a full glass. I close the cupboard and continue searching for the ingredients. By the time I have everything ready it's 10:15. I begin to work on the cookies first.

It is midnight by the time I finish both the takoyaki and the cookies and cleaned up. I made about three dozen macarons and a dozen takoyaki. I leave the cookies in a glass dome I found while looking for baking sheets.

I look down at my takoyaki, not knowing what to do. I can leave it here for Ayato, but someone may eat or they'll get cold. I could get Ayato and tell him they're down, but, again, they will get cold and I don't want him to complain. I could bring them to him, but, well, what will go wrong? I can just put them in his room, and he won't be able to complain. I pick up the plate and take out the map Yui drew me.

I walk down halls and around corners going to Ayato's room. I haven't run into anyone all day, which is a bit weird. Does everyone stay in there room or go to their special spot on weekends?

By the time I get to the vampire's room the takoyaki have cooled, but are still warm. I knock on the door a few times and wait, but the knocks are returned with silence.

"Ayato?" I ask, wondering if he's in his room.  _He could be at his oh so special lake._ The thought gives me enough courage to open the door. I peer in to see that it's empty. I walk in a place the plate onto the dresser.

I start to walk around his room in curiosity. There isn't much to look at, but I've never been into one of the vampires' room. The room I talked to Reiji in was surely not his bedroom, it looked too much like a lab.

"What are you doing!?" I hear a voice snap, making me jump. I look to see Ayato standing in front of, what seems to be, the bathroom door. He is where only his pants and a towel around his neck, so I'm guessing he just finished taking a shower.

"Oh, I'm sorry," I say apologetically. "I came to give you your takoyaki. You didn't answer the door, so-"

"You come into my room!?" he yells, marching towards me. I start to back up, but I trip on my own two feet and fall onto his couch. He comes right up to my face.

"How dare you start looking through Yours Truly's belongings? What else have you been messing with?"

"I-I'm sorry, I wasn't going through anything. I didn't know where you were, so I thought I could just put your food in here. I didn't want your takoyaki getting cold and you getting mad at me. I'm sorry if I've upset you, I'll just leave."

I try to get up and go to the door, but he grabs wrist and pulls to him. I try to pull away, but he is too strong. He lets go and I fall to the floor with a thud. He drops to the floor and puts his hands on the floor near my head.

"Don't ever come into my room again, Melons," he spits. His scowls fades and in its place comes a smirk. Rising from on top of me. I sit up and scoot away from him, until me back is against a couch. "Do you know what goes good with takoyaki?"

I shake my head in response. He leans close into me and say, "Blood." He then bites down on my neck, drawing my crimson liquid. I whimper as his fangs pierce into my skin, causing my neck to erupt in pain. There is then a knock on the door. He stops sucking my blood and release me from his bite. He frowns and looks at the door.

"Ayato?" I hear Yui say from the other side of the door. Ayato then start to wickedly grin. He looks at me and puts a finger to his lips. I narrow my eyes at him. I try to get up but he grabs my wrist and I'm forced to sit. Without warning his rips off my shirt.

"Ayat-" I'm cut off as he bites down onto my shoulder and I yelp in pain.

"Hikari?" I hear Yui asks. "Ayato is Hikari in there? Ayato? Ayato I'm coming in."

I'm about to protest as I see the door open, but Ayato grins and take my face into his hands and kiss me. My eyes grow wide and I'm paralyzed with shock as I feel the vampire lips against mine. Tasting my own blood on his lips makes me feel sick. I look over to see Yui, just as shocked as I am, staring down at us with her mouth open.

"I-I-I'm sorry," she says as she backs away from the door and runs down the hall. Finally coming to my scenes I try to push Ayato off of me. After what seems like ages he release me with a grin. I wipe my mouth the back of my hand in disgust.

"What the fuck, Ayato?" I snap, "Why did you that?" He begins to laugh at my anger.

"Pay back for coming into my room," he says as he rises from the floor. I grab my shirt and throw it back on as I get up from the floor. I see him by the dresser, eating his takoyaki. I wish I put some poison in there. I leave the room after giving Ayato one more nasty glare.

I march down the halls looking for Yui.  _Why didn't she help me? She say I was in a predicament. But did it really look like it? Now that I think about it, Ayato set it up. We were both shirtless and 'kissing' in his bedroom. Oh God Ayato, why?_ I clench my fist _, oh, how I wish I slapped him. I just need to find Yui and tell her that it's just a misunderstanding._


	12. Lash Out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My favorite chapter ヽ(^。^)丿  
> Hope you love it as much as I do. It was so much fun to write.

 

I'm the first one to make it to the dining room for once. I haven't been able to talk to Yui about today's misunderstanding. Every time I try to speak to her, she runs off. All day I've been in my room, reading the book I got from the school library. No one came into my room, not even Laito. I'm starting to think that people are starting to give me my space, but it feels weird now. They've all been swarming me, know they just buzzed off.

Everyone soon begins to enter the room. Yui sits next to me which is a bit surprising. I look over to her and she looks at me and nods in acknowledgment. Does this me she's willing to talk? Joy surges through me at the thought.

Much to my disgust though, Ayato sits across the table from me. I don't look at him, I know seeing him will make me want to commit murder. I can envision myself wrapping my fingers around that neck of his. Squeezing it until it becomes the same color his hair.

Reiji soon comes out with the food and we begin eating. Of course, no one speaks. Ayato glares at me the, causing my nerves to boil.  _What is his problem? I'm the one pissed at him._ I begin to recall the books I read about murder and how it was handled. How hard is it to kill a vampire? Is there some supernatural way or did I just need to stab him through the damn heart? Well, I doubt he even has one.

I try to calm myself, saying all I have to do is finish eating and return back to my room for the remainder of the day. I continue to eat, trying not to let the vampire bother me. I look up and make eye contact with him for a second. He gives me a disgusted face, like I'm the jerk in the situation.  _That's fucking it!_

"What do you want, Ayato?" I say in an annoyed voice, filling the empty silence.

"What?" he says in response.

"You heard me. I'm sick of you staring at me all the time. Is there something you need? Didn't your mother teach you it's rude to stare?"

"Hikari," Yui whispers in shock.

"You don't speak to Yours Truly like that," he demands, standing up.

"Stop this you two," Reiji snaps in a harsh voice.

"Don't glare at me all day. It's annoying. I'm not the faggot in the room, if you want to see him, look in the damn mirror," I say, raising my voice as I narrowing my eyes.

"What's annoying is a slut screaming in the middle of the night waking everyone up and coming into people's room without permission," he screams.

"Don't call me a slut! You don't know what I've been through, so fuck off!"

"I'm sure you're willing to fuck anyone. And furthermore, don't speak to Yours Truly like that!"

"Stop being so damn arrogant. ' _Yours Truly_ ,'" I mock in a whiny voice. "You're full of shit!"

"Ayato, be seated," Reiji says through clenched teeth. "You also Hikari, and watch yourself."

"No," I protest. "I've had enough of this shit. I've been here for a week and it's horrible. You vampires are all rude perverts. There is a difference from taking my fucking blood and harassing me, and you guys don't know where to draw the damn line. Do you not know how to treat a guess? Or I'm I just livestock to you monsters? If that's the case, you are all worse than Natsume!" I scream, tears filling my eyes. I look at the triplet, all slack-jawed, Reiji and Subaru clenching their fist in anger, Shuu, staring at me with no expression.

I have a right to be mad at them. Ayato and Laito have been harassing me, Kanato is physically hurting me, Reiji isn't doing anything to keep, Subaru and Shuu...nothing. I look at the eldest and youngest of the brothers. They've have done nothing but help me, and I lash out at them. I cover my mouth in regret and the tears start running down my face.

"Hik-" Yui starts, but I don't hear her. I bolt out of the room, down the hall. I hear shouts from the dining room as I head for the front door.

I'm temporarily blinded by the bright sunlight. I run as far and fast as I can, trying to leave my problems behind me. I sprint down the walkway, not caring where it takes me. I end up running all the way to the front gate.

I look past the gate and at the road. If only the door could sense my sadness and open so I could free myself. The birds sing and dance around in the sky, as if they were mocking me. They're free to go where everywhere desire.

I sit against the large, iron fence and take a breather.

What I said was horrible. The Sakamakis give me shelter, food, and make sure I am educated. I should be grateful I'm not being abused in a cell anymore. And comparing them to Natsume, how low can I get?

Half the things that have gone wrong started with me doing something wrong, they just reacting in a way that felt natural for them. Ayato and Laito harass me because I wasn't careful enough. I just went and had sex just because I could. Ayato is right, I am a slut. But he has saved me from being clobbered and acted as an unneeded shield, both came with a cost though.

Reiji did nothing wrong, well, he did nothing period. I never came to him for help, so, again, that's on me. Kanato got mad, as everyone does, and lashed out. He just hurts people physically, like I do verbally.

And Subaru, all he has done is help me. He stopped Ayato from hurting me, helped me when I hurt myself, and has shown me around the mansion before. Shuu, oh Shuu. He doesn't do much, but yet I can't help but feel a bit happier around him.

I rise from the ground and look out through the gate one last time. I don't really want to go back right now. I don't think Reiji will allow Yui to come and get me, and I'm not quite sure if the vampires can come outside during this time of day. Looks like the odds are in my favor.

I begin to walk the perimeter of the property, keeping my right side to the fence that soon turns into a wall which then turns to a wooded area. I think back to the days at the Church, when Yui and I could go outside whenever we wanted. Even when it was time to go inside, we would sneak right back out.

I never had that privilege at the Kei household. If I wanted to go outside, either I had to be accompanied by two guards or both Natsume and Kaname had to come out with me. Kaname wasn't really an outdoors person, we would go inside after about twenty minutes. Well, at least I was able to be outside then. After the accident, I never left my cell until I went back to the Church. Well, there were a few times, but that's completely different matter.

I walk until my legs begin to hurt and I'm sweating. I look at the sky as the early fall sun shines down on me. Dinner is at 7:30, and I've been out here for about an hour. Ugh, I need to get a watch. It's too early to go back inside, everyone will still be up, and I don't really know how to face them.

I wander a bit more until I find a gazebo. It's not the same one I usually see, meaning that I'm no longer on the same side of the property. I walk over and brush some dirt of the bench and lay down on it. I try to take a nap, but the stone bench feels uncomfortable.  _Come on Hikari, you slept on a concrete floor for eighteen months, this is a cloud compared to that._  I close my eyes and drift into a light slumber.

* * *

 

I wake to find something licking my hand. I look down to see a white cat with orange and black spots licking and gnawing at my hand. I move my hand, causing the cat to walk back a little.

I sit up and stretch, while doing so I feel a slight pain in my neck. I rotate to try to get the kink out, but it still aches. I look at the cat and give it my hand. It smells it and rubs its face against it. I start to lightly pet it's head and it begins to purr. I rise from the seat and the cat runs away.

I leave the gazebo and shield my eyes as I leave the shade. The sun is high in the sky, so it has to be at least noon, maybe later. It makes me realize how much I miss the warmth of day. Ever since I game here, I've been sleeping during this time of the day. I guess it would make sense because the vampires wouldn't come out if it was necessary. Furthermore, the brothers should be sleeping or at least in their rooms. I begin to walk around the mansion to try to find the front door. It takes me about ten minutes, but I end up where I started.

I push the door in slowly and peer into the greeting room, empty. My plan is to go straight to my room, but my stomach says otherwise. I barely ate any of my food before lashing out, and that was hours ago.

I silently make my way towards the kitchen for a snack before bed. I make my way through the dark hall to the dining room. Being in the room makes me feel sick again. I walk into the kitchen to see that it, like the rest of the house, is vacant.

There is a shadow on the counter that makes me jump. I turn on the light to see that it is one of the wine bottles. So someone had a drink. I get the ingredients to make myself a sandwich. I keep looking at the lone bottle of wine on the counter as I eat my snack. I give in to the temptation and get a glass.

I debate on how much I should take as I stare at the wine glass. Natsume usually only drank half to a whole cup, though he once drank about four glasses when Kaname died. I pour myself a fourth of a cup and take a sip.

It is tart and makes me cough, but I take another sip. It is hard to manage, but I continue consuming it until my glass is empty. I pour myself about half a cup and drink it. It tastes different now, it doesn't have the same feeling going down my throat.

My vision begin to get blurry and my head starts to spin. I stumble a bit and lean against the counter or support.

"Look what you did to me," I say to the bottle in frustration. "Because of you I can't see!"

"It's not my fault," the bottle says in response. "You're drinking me. Stop trying to blame your problems on other people."

"Shush ups," I say. "You don't know me." I sit down on the floor. I begin to cough violently and a look at my almost empty glass. I throw it onto the floor, causing it to shatter into hundreds of pieces. I hear the door open to see Shuu looking at me. Shuu.

"I have Shuu on my side," I say to the bottle. "He likes me. He doesn't rape me or is mean to me." I look up at him and smile. "I like him too." I get up and try to walk towards him, but my knees give way and I fall. He catches me before I hit the floor.

"Hikari," he says calmly, "why were you drinking?"

"The bottle was taunting me and made me upset," I say with another cough. He picks me up and starts to carry me. I wrap my hands around his neck and cuddle into him. He is so warm and strong. He takes me to my room and puts me on the bed. He goes to my draw and takes out my pajamas.

"Are you the one that has been changing my clothes?" I ask in a dreary voice. "You only change me, nothing else? No looking at my lady parts, 'kay? You're such a gentleman." He doesn't say a word in response. He takes off my shirt and throws my nightgown on. After that he takes off my skirt.

"Shuu are you upset?" I ask him through my blurry vision. "I'm sorry for what I said, I really am." Tears begin to run down my face. "I didn't mean it. You're not a monster, you're nice. You make me habby, so blease don't be mad at me. If you're mad, then it would make me very ubset."

I begin to cry harder and fall onto him. I clench his shirt and cry into him. He takes his hand and rubs my head. He sits me down onto the bed and makes me lay down. He tries to get up, but I grab the back of his shirt.

I don't want him to leave me, everyone always leaves more That, or I'm forced to leave them. Kaname left me, Natsume me left me- yes, Natume left me, there was a demon in his place for the last two years. I was forced to leave my dad and Yui and everyone at the Church. I don't want him to leave me, not Shuu. Shuu can't leave me.

"You can't leabe," I slur. "You can't leave me, Shuu. Don't, I don't want to be by myself." He looks at me with his blue eyes and sits back down with me. I fall asleep holding him.


	13. Apology

My alarm screams, causing me to wake. I hit my nightstand multiple times before getting the clock. I sit up only to crash back down. My head pounds with pain causing me to groan. What the heck is this?

I think back to yesterday's events. My rant, running away, nap, snack...wine. Fuck, I have a fucking hangover. I lay with my head throbbing, regretting taking a sip of the liquid. I need to figure out what I'm going to do.

I throw off my covers and walk to the bathroom. No, walking is a lie. I dragged feet with weak knees, using the wall as support. I make it to the sink and look at myself in the mirror.

Bloody Mary would look like a five-star model compared to me. Half of my hair remains in my pony while the rest is sticking up in a mane. I have circles dark under my eyes and the eyeliner I applied yesterday stains my face. I wash my face with cold water.

I get my hand towel and dry my face. I drop to the floor and start digging under the cabinet to find the painkillers Yui gave me. I fill up a cup water and pop three into my mouth and chug the water.

You eat then take the painkillers, a fact I constantly forget. After a few seconds, I feel my stomach twist. I make to the toilet in time to vomit up the pills, remainder of my sandwich, and whatever was left in there. I cough multiple times before lifting my head back up. I wipe my mouth with the back of my hand with a sigh.

I collapse onto to the bathroom rug. What am I going to do? I don't want to face the guys with this headache, but I need to eat, which means going to breakfast.  _Come on Hikari, you've been through worse, you've become spoiled._

I walk back to my bed and collapse on it. I look at the door, waiting for someone to come in, but it never happens. Do they even know I'm here? It doesn't matter, I'm going to lock myself in my room until I figure out today's plan.

There are three problems with this plan, though. One: at this moment I realize my door doesn't have a lock. Two: vampires can freaking teleport, making the completely useless, even if it could lock. Three: someone has already begun to open my door.

I look up to see Yui peeking into my room. She enters my room after seeing me on my bed. I soon notice that Subaru is behind her. My face heats up and I drag the cover over my head, not wanting him to see me. I don't want anyone seeing the pitiful state I'm in, both physically and mentally.

"Hikari, are you okay?" Yui says and I hear her walk closer to me.

"I'm alive," I grumble, not wanting to talk about yesterday at this second.

"Are you coming for breakfast?" she ask soothingly. Am I coming? Hell no. Wait that was a question, so I have an option.

"No," I say flatly. It hurts me imagining the dejected look at her face, but I refuse to do or say anymore. I hear her walk away and the sound of the door closing. It stops before being fully closed.

"Everyone is meeting in the meeting room later after breakfast," she says before I hear the door close.

A meeting, why is she bothering to tell me? It's not like I want to go. Having all the brothers there, it would be awkward and embarrassing.

Something clicks in my head. All the brothers will be together, in the same room, perfect. I go to my nightstand and open it to get my school bag. I grab a random notebook, get a pen, and begin to write my apology proposal.

I go downstairs after about forty-five minutes. I go to the room that I first met all the boys, guessing that it's the meeting room. My guess is correct as I hear murmuring as I get closer.

I take a deep breath before entering the room. I open the door and the room falls silent. I look at all the guys. Subaru is against the wall with his arms crossed, Yui next to him, the triplets sit on the sofa, Shuu lays on the long one, and Reiji stands.

"Hello, everyone," I say in a confident voice. Shuu opens his eyes to look at me. Great, already have everyone's attention. "I know you all are upset with me because of yesterday. And I'm extremely sorry for it. I wish I could take back what I said, but I can't."  _Okay, that's good, no stuttering. Make sure to breath, no need to get choked up_. I mentally cheer myself on as I speak as calmly as possible.

"I regret everything I said during dinner last night. I was being extremely ungrateful and rude. I was mad and said stuff that was out of line. I'm even disgusted with myself. I understand why all of you may be angry with me, I really do. I'm the one at fault, not any of you." I lower myself onto the floor, sitting on my knees and put my face on the floor. "I'm so sorry for what I said and how I acted. I hope you can find it in your hearts to forgive me. I truly am sorry, please accept my apology."

Tears start to fill my eyes. I really do mean what I said, and I do want them to forgive me. What if they don't? I stay like that for what seems to be forever. I could only imagine what they are silently communicating to each other. I debate on whether or not I should add my final part. The silence makes me uneasy and I slowly rise into a sitting position.

"I know I can't be that easily forgiven, and I don't think I should. What I did was uncalled for, and cannot go just slide with an apology, I know this. I'm ready to accept only punishment you see fit."

Everyone, including Yui, exchange looks, but I don't dare look any of them in the eyes. They seem as if they don't know what to do, as if what I did was unexpected.

Why are you guys acting like this? Isn't this normal? I know they run things differently from the Kei household, but this is how I always do it. If I ever did anything that really frustrated Natsume or Kaname, I would write an apology proposal, and ask for their forgiveness. How else am I supposed to apologize for something of this magnitude, bake cookies? I'm tempted to scream, 'Do you forgive me or not?', but I hold my tongue.

Shuu sits up from his resting position and takes out his earbuds. Did he even hear me with those things plugged in his ears!? He gets up and walks towards to me. I take in a breath, not knowing what he may do. He doesn't seem like the violent type, but I could've said that about Kanato too at first glance. He comes right in front of me, bends down, and extends his hand.

"You don't need to do that," he says. A single tear rolls down my cheek and I take his hand. He helps me up and I wipe the tears from my eyes. At least he forgives me, I think. Everyone stares at Shuu for a bit, then back to me.

"Well," Reiji says, finally breaking the silence, "I do agree that what you did cannot go unpunished. I was thinking about this yesterday after your outburst. I did have something in mind, but after this, I think that I have a change of mind." He turns to his brothers. "You did insult us all, and you're willing to accept the punishment. I think that we each get to punish you, however we see fit."

I gulp. I see Ayato and Laito exchange a look as if they know exactly what they're going to do. They are going to take advantage of this privilege, I can tell.

"But," Reiji continues, "you have to come to me and tell me how you're going to handle this. I don't want anything too bad happening to her. Nothing too extreme." He glares at the red heads. I let out a breath of relief, thank you Reiji. I guess he isn't that bad.

"Hikari," he says. "Would you mind explaining the broken glass I found on the floor in the kitchen this morning?" It takes me a moment to understand what he's getting at. May face turns a bit pink with embarrassment? Oh god, last night.

"Uh," I say scratching the back of my head. "About that, it's actually a bit funny. I had a little to drink last night and things got a bit out of hand. Sorry about the glass."

"'A little drink'?"

"Yeah, again, I'm very sorry. I was a bit depressed and it was taunting me."

"'Taunting'?" he repeats with raised eyebrows. I smile uneasily, not knowing what else to say.

"I don't get it," Ayato says. "Didn't you want to talk to us about something, Reiji?"

"Yeah," Kanato says. "Yui told us, right Teddy?"

"I had no such thing planned," Reiji says in response, looking at Yui. "I was told that you were messing with my table cloths again, Ayato." Everyone look at Yui, her face growing red.

"Hikari needs a chance to apologize to everyone, together," she explained. "I didn't think that all of you would listen if I told you the truth." I mentally make a note to thank Yui for her trouble.

"I will deal with you later," Reiji says to my sister. "As for the rest of you, you can leave." Shuu is the first to leave the room. Everyone soon starts to leave. Right before he left the room, I grab Subaru's wrist. I quickly let go, not wanting to anger him. He looks down at me with an annoyed expression.

"Can I speak with you?" I ask. We stay as everyone else leaves, and I shut the door. "I want to personally apologize to you. The whole time I was here you have been super nice and caring. I was quite mad yesterday and wasn't thinking right. I just want to say that you were not on my mind when I was saying that stuff." He looks at me with a blank expression.

"Is that all?" he asks. Why was he acting like this? I was totally serious.

"Um, yeah," I say. He raises his hand and hits me on the back of the head quite hard. "Ouch, why'd you do that?"

"Punishment," he says before walking out the door and closes it. I stare at the door and look around the empty room. That just happened, I just got on the floor, begging for their forgiveness. I rub my head where he slapped me.

I begin to laugh. Not a hysterical one or a giggle, but a laugh of joy. What is so funny? But I can't stop, and collapse onto the floor. He hit me on the head and called it a punishment. I don't expect one of them to pull out a whip or anything, but I slap upside the head, really? Was he ever even mad at me?

I sit on the floor for a bit, think about everything that has happened. What am I going to do with my life? It feels like it's falling apart, but is it? I basically just gave myself up, said I'm at the vampires' mercy. Am I just going to stay here for the rest of my life, being livestock? I know it's an upgrade from what was happening with Natsume, but what now? Could I have stayed at the Church? Maybe run away, start a new life somewhere where no one knows me? Well, it's not like I have the option now.

Or maybe my life is actually coming together. I'm being educated and next year is my last year in high school. Not to brag, but I'm pretty smart, and my grades show it. Maybe I can go to a college or university far away and start my life over, away from everything. But what about Yui? What will happen to her?

I try to dismiss my plans for the future, anything can happen in the next two years, anything- I've learned from experience. Things have changed in this past week that I never thought would happen but did. I need to focus on the present and try to figure out what to do about today. I don't know if anyone of the vampire, besides Subaru, are going to punish me today, which makes me feel on edge. It's like a bomb going off. The constant  _tick, tick, tick_  is more agonizing than the  _boom_.

I make my way to the kitchen, dying to get something to eat. I enter the kitchen to see Kanato snacking on the macaroons I made yesterday. I get some crackers and an apple from the cabinet and cheese from the fridge. We eat our snacks in silence, not looking at each other.

To me, Kanato is the strangest out of all my boys. He always mumbles to his bear and stares at people with his big purple eyes. I look up at him to see him gazing at me. I finish my food and head back up to my room. I spend the remainder of the day in my room, reading and waiting for the punishment that never came.


	14. Embarrassed

Having the vampire individually punish me is like hanging oneself. It's not okay, but you feel as if you have to go through with it. Saying 'okay' is kicking down the chair, there is no turning back. You stay there, in pain, because there is the time between kicking that chair and death, and it's the definition of agony. You have time to regret, and that time is pure suffering.

All morning I've been feeling like this. Every time one of the guys get closer to me, I flinch or back up some. No one brings up yesterday's events during breakfast. I think everyone is still getting over the shock, but I really don't get it.

What I did was totally fine, why did they act like I was kissing their feet for forgiveness? I glance at Shuu a few times as he messes around with his eggs. What was up with him? 'You don't need to do that', his words echo in my head. I remember the feeling I had when I took his hand. They were butterflies, no, birds in my stomach. That was the first direct act of kindness Shuu has shown me.

I finish my food and go to my room to get my bag for school. I do one more check in the mirror. I have a few pairs of bite marks still healing on my neck, but they are covered with the light foundation I have. I run my fingers through my hair before turning and leaving the bathroom. To my surprise, Yui is sitting on my bed when I walk into the room.

"Sup, Yui?" I ask, picking my bag up from the floor.

"I wanted to check on you before we left. I just wanted to know if you're okay," she says getting up. I'm not sure how that statement makes me feel. She says it like my mother. I know she is worried about me, but I'm not a child that needs to be asked if I'm okay every second. The thing is, I don't think I can ever be 'okay'. Not when I'm being kept like livestock, not when I'm a constant state of fear and anxiety, well, almost always.

"Yeah, I'm fine," I lie.

"Okay. I just wanted to make sure. You know, after yester-"

"Yui, I'm okay. Please stop worrying about me all the time," I say in a tone that was a bit too harsh. She looks down at her feet. "Look Yui." I sit next to her. "I'm really happy that you care, that you want me to be happy. But I'm fine. As long as I'm not being tortured, I'm grateful. And if I'm not feeling well, or I'm upset, I'll come to you."

I rub her back and look at her, smiling. I look into her pink eyes, one of the only features we share from our father. "Know come on Mom, before the guys get mad."

"Yeah, Reiji's waiting," a voice says. We look up simultaneously to see Laito in the doorway. Do these vampires even care about privacy? "Question, how are you two related? You don't look that similar." I look at Yui with a raised eyebrow.

"The same you guys are," she says. "Same father, different mothers." He nods and leaves. We both get up and walk to the front door.

So they're half-brothers, that makes sense. I make my way into the limo and sit by Ayato and Yui scoots next to me. I move over a bit, not wanting to be so close to the vampire. The ride is silent and extremely uncomfortable. Of course, this is the closest we have all been since my tantrum. I feel like the eyes in the vehicle linger on me more than usual.

We pull up to the school and everyone soon begin to get out. I'm relieved that we are parting for the time being, even if I'm going to the same classes as the triplets. I'm about to exit the limo, but Ayato grabs my wrist.

"Stay for a bit, I need to speak with you," he says with a smirk. I sit back down and put my hands in my lap. I guess it's time for my punishment, but really Ayato, right before school? I take in a breath and look down at my hands.

He takes my chin and makes me look him in the eyes. "I want you," he says, pausing. My heart begins to race. What, what, what do you want? Ayato, don't do this to me, just fucking tell me and get it over with! "I want you to address me as Ayato-sama from now on."

What? Ayato-sama? I look at him with wide eyes. Is he serious? "Ayato-sama?" I echo in confusion.

"Everything I had planned, Reiji declined," he explains. I begin to imagine his submissions prior to this one, each one making me shiver. Thank you Reiji for being an annoyingly strict person. "I don't like Reiji's punishments, so I will follow his rules this time. But you must call me Ayato-sama at all times. If you don't, you get a random punishment of my choice."

He is totally serious. At least I'm not getting a beating. But the punishment can cause me to be really punished, how great. I nod and leave the vehicle. Well, that's not even a punishment, just a change in title. At least he isn't trying to get me to call him 'master'. I refuse to address anyone as that every again. No one in this world is my master, no matter what happened.

I make it to my first class as the bell rings and take my seat in the back of the class next to Yui. I smile at her and give her a thumbs up, assuring her I'm good. The teacher walks in and we begin class.

It feels as if every class before literature flies by. Notes, projects, slide shows, nothing big. I try to talk to Yui, but something seems to always happens, and we can't speak. We got to literature a bit early and try to talk. But as soon as I say 'hello' a girl wants to talk to Yui about art homework.

About half way through class, the teacher said she had to step out for a moment. She left notes on the board for us to copy. I take my notes like usual until I feel something hit me.

I look down onto the floor to see a crumpled piece of paper on the floor. I pick it up, curious about what it says. I open it to see a blank sheet. I examine both sides, but there's nothing. I shrug and go back to my work.

Not a moment later does another hit me. I look up and turn my head to the left, the direction it came from. No one seems to look like they've done it, everyone is writing. I'm in the back row, so not many people even look back here. I pick it up and open it to see writing on it. The writing is sloppy, barely legible. It reads:  _What have you been doing during lunch, Melons?_

I crumple it out of anger. Only one person would use such an annoying nickname. I look over to Ayato. He is copying note like the rest of us but smiles slightly. I rip a page from my notebook and write on it:  _Stop trying to look innocent, Ayato. What I do doesn't concern you, so leave me alone._

Thankfully we are both in the back, so I toss it over the three students between us. Two of them look over at me, and I just smile slightly. I see Ayato open the paper and read it. His eyes narrow, then he smirks. He scribbles something and throws it back. Now a few more students have begun to notice our shenanigans and start staring at us. I lower my head and open the paper.

 _Ayato? Have you already forgotten about our discussion earlier?_  I look over at him, and he grins from ear to ear. Shit. What the heck is he going to do?

"Hikari, what's going on?" Yui ask, turning in her chair.

"Uh, nothing, don't worry," I tell her, but I'm worrying myself. I look over to him and he motions for me to come over to him. By now everyone is observing us. I want to fade away, not liking all the eyes on me. I get up and walk to Ayato with clenched fists. "What do you want?"

"I just wanted to know what you've been up to during lunch," he says. "You don't have to be so rude. But that's not the point, you forgot about your punishment. And do you remember what I said about forgetting?"

I nod my head. He motions me to come closer and whisper something in my ear. My eyes grow wide at his request. I would complain, but I don't want him to give me an even worse punishment. I walk back to my desk. I take the paper, rip them up, and throw the remains in the trash. I plop back down in my chair and survey the room. Most of the students are still peering at me, and my blood begin to boil.

"Can I help any of you?" I snap a bit loudly so the whole class can hear me. All heads turn back to their notebooks or the board. I look down at my own.  _What are you doing Hikari? Don't be mad at them, they didn't do anything. Don't take your anger for Ayato out on them. Control yourself, you need to remember that. Your temper is why you have to deal with Ayato-sama now._

Some of them start to whisper to each other. I just realized something, this was the first time I talked to the entire class since I introduced myself last week. I have only spoken to a few people besides Yui and vampires.  _Great way to scratch that blank slate of yours_.

The teacher walks in moments later, like nothing happens. She sits down and the class rep goes over to her. I slap my forehead, of course, I'm going to get in trouble. They chat for a bit and the rep sits down. Ours gaze locks for a moment, but she looks down. The teacher gets up and looks at me.

"I heard that you were fooling around when I was out," she says. "Is this true Komori-san?" Yui's head snaps up in attention.

The teacher looks over to Yui. "My apologies Yui-san I'm speaking to your sister." Her eyes glare back at me. "Hikari Komori-san, were you playing around in my class when I stepped out?" I look over at Ayato, who is trying his best to overcome his grin.

"Yes, I was," I say in the sweetest, most innocent voice. I standing up, feeling the vampire's gaze on me. He thought this would happen, and he was right. I stomach drops as I remember the words he told me to say. I take a breath and begin.

"I didn't want to disturb the others, but I really had to tell," I swallow my pride, "Ayato-sama something really, really important." Everyone in the classroom goes wide-eyed. They were either taken back by how I addressed Ayato, or how I just took a complete one-eighty in personality. "I'm truly am sorry everyone for distracting you from your work. I'm expressly sorry to you, Ayato-sama. I should have waited, but I was being selfish and distracted you also." For the final piece, I bow to him. I stay like that for a few seconds and sit back down.

The room is so silent I bet they can hear the pounding of my heart in my chest. I make eye contact with Yui for a split second but look away. I can't face her like this. I stare at my half written notes and pick up my pencil. I continue writing my notes. I need to just brush this off, act like it never happened.

One by one, everyone picks back up from where they left off. I get a couple of glances. I look at the clock. The bell should ring any second now. I have history next. I'm going to have to be with Ayato for another hour. I stop writing a look down at my paper. I haven't noticed till now, but I wasn't even writing notes, I was drawing.

I'm not much of an artist, but I did draw every day when I first stayed with Natsume. I had a full sketchbook of random stuff, but it's probably destroyed the rest of my stuff. I was never real good, most were mere doodles. Natsume was the real artist, though. I look at the drawing, a cherry blossom tree. I use to always draw them. They made me think of Natsume, reminding me of the tattoo he gave me long ago.

The bell rings and I shut my book. I throw everything in my bag and run out of the room. I pass the history and go straight to the bathroom. I go into a stall and sit on the closed toilet seat. I can't go to class, seeing Ayato wants me want to scream.

How dare he make me say such embarrassing things? And me bowing to him, that was overkill. I thought this was going to be a stupid, not really punish-y punishment, but it's harder than I thought. I hear the tardy bell ring, knowing that I'm officially late for class. I leave the restroom and walk to the nurse's office. I bet I can get a note for missing class from the nurse.

"Hikari," I hear a voice say. I turn to see Subaru at the end of the hall. He come up to me and stops about a foot in front of me. "I thought you have class at this time."

"I do," I barely whisper, leaning against the wall. He copies my action.

"Is there a reason why you're skipping class?" I want to tell him to leave me alone, that it none of his business. But, for some reason, I lean my head against his shoulder. Maybe because I feel weak and he could probably give me the support I need. Like me physically leaning on him can hold me up as I internally collapse. He looks down at me.

I let my head linger on his shoulder. I don't look at him but at the wall. Coincidentally, we both let out a sigh in unison. I expect him to move or give me an ugly face, but he's neutral

"Can I talk to you?" I ask. He nods in response, and I lift my head off him. I open my mouth to speak to him, but he silences me when he takes my wrist in his hand. He leads me down a few halls before we make it to the courtyard.

Memories of last week's events begin to flow into my brain, but I dismiss them. What happened isn't relevant. He leads me to a bench and we sit down. We stay there in silence for a bit before I begin. I tell him everything that happened today. He never stopped me, just let me vent. I finish and notice that I was now standing.

"Well," he say, "that's Ayato, a fucking bastard. He's like that, wanting to embarrass anyone for his own personal amusement. But Hikari, why do you keep pushing Yui away?"

The words make me stop everything. Am I really pushing her away? Am I actual hurting her? She is always there, but I never go to her. She isn't in class now, yet I still go to Subaru instead of her. Why am I acting like this? I lie to her, hide things from her.

"I don't...know. She is always wanting to know if I'm okay or not, always trying to help. It just, I feel that..." I stop. How do I feel? How do I feel about Yui? She is my sister, but I feel as if she is a complete stranger. Subaru notices me troubled state and stops questioning me.

"Speaking of Yui, I have to go. I need to tell her that you're fine. She did ask me to find you." He gets up and begin to walk away.

"What do you mean, how does she know I'm not in class?"

"She popped her head in your class and didn't see you. She was worried and basically begged me to find you." He eyed me again. "Like I said, she is really concerned about you. Are you sure she's the younger sister?"

"Yeah, I am sure. Um, one more thing Subaru." He stops and turns to me. "Are you and Yui a thing?"

He scowls at me and leaves. "What's it to you?"

"Just curious."

"Curiosity killed the cat." He walks away.

Hm, I totally thought they had something going on. I fall back onto the bench. Why am I being like this? Just like the other day, yelling at Subaru and Shuu when they did nothing negative towards me. Why am I being so cruel to the people that are helping me, caring about me?

I make my way to the nurse's office once again. I enter and release she isn't present. I lay on a bed for a few minutes until she comes back in. Testing my luck, I tell her I've been here for about fifteen minutes, when in reality it's been two. She apologizes, writes on a slip, and tells me to go on back to class.

I drag my feet down the halls. I spy a clock in the hall. Class has been in session for about thirty minutes now, so I only have the other half to complete. I make it to the class and walk in. I apologize and hand my teacher the note. She barely looks at it and tells me to take a seat. A mistake on her part, because she would have noticed that I was gone for double the time written on the slip if she really read the slip.

I look to my class for an empty seat and my stomach knots. In the middle row sits Haru and Keita. I lower my head and rush to the back. Of course, they will come back to class, not like they were kicked out. I take a seat and take out my book.

I can't focus on the lesson. The thought of Haru and Keita trying to get information out me makes me feel uneasy. I look down at my hand, pencil shaking in it. Hikari, snap out of it. You need to stop being scared of everything and everyone. They did something that frighten me but doesn't mean I have to quake in fear when they come around. I get a grip and focus on my work.

The bell rings and I'm out of my seat. I leave the room, but someone grabs my wrist. I turn to see Ayato. I'm about to snap at him, but remember what happened in literature.

"Do you need something,  _Ayato-sama_ ," I say through gritted teeth.

"For the last time, what are you during lunch?" he asks with a bored expression.

"Why do you act like you care?" I say through narrowed eyes.

"I have my reasons."

"Just leave me alone!" He loosens his grip and I pull away. I step back and begin to rush down the halls. Like last time, I go a long, corner-turning away so he can't follow me. By the time I get to the room I'm out of breath.

I get to the hall a notice two girls and a boy sitting in the hall the music room is on. The boy is blond and tall. The two girls look very similar, maybe sisters. One of them wears glasses, though. I don't really mind them, but one of them call out to me. I recognize her from my literature class. I quietly groan and go over to her. I try to be nice, not act annoyed.

"Hello, may I help you?" I ask kindly. She seems a bit taken back from my attitude.

"I know it really isn't my business but is there something between you and Ayato?" she ask bluntly, looking at her feet. The question makes me want to throw up. Such a disgusting thought. Ayato and me?

"No, no, no. If this is about earlier today, I just lost a bet," I lie with a half-hearted smile.

"Oh, okay. I was just wondering."

"Why, you have the hots for him?" I joke, but I soon feel stupid for asking a stranger such a question.

"Oh, no, no, no, just wanted to know." Her face turns a bit pink and the girl next to me gives me a nasty look. "Anyways, I, um, we have a question for you," she says, looking at her friends.

"We want to know if you're the one playing in the music room," the blonde boy says.

"Yeah," I say uneasily. The boy nudges the girl wearing the glasses.

"No one really goes into the music room," she explains. "Some people heard someone playing the violin last week, and people started to think there was a ghost or something in there. No one really wants to go in there, so we decided to check it out."

Oh no, are they going to interfere in my music playing. I know it isn't my room nor Shuu's, but I don't want other people in there. I feel so much better when I go there and play. Even though I'm not alone, I feel like I'm in my own little place where no one can bother me. It almost feels like a sanctuary where I can't be troubled. Ayato and Laito don't bother me and I can lose myself.

As if the boy read my mind, he says, "We just wanted to check on it. We aren't going to both you, we'll be going know." He and Glasses start to walk away. The other girl lingers for a bit looking at her feet.

"I'm Megumi Shiro if you ever want to talk. I always see you by yourself," she says before running off to her friends. I stay there for a bit, shocked. Was she trying to be my friend?

I've only had one friend and I haven't seen her in eight years. Her name was Misaki, and she came to the Church about twice a week. Yui and I used to play with her all the time, but then she stopped coming.

I try to forget about the past and turn the corner to the music room. I enter and see Shuu on the piano bench, lying down. I frown at him, that's where I sit.

"Hello, Shuu," I say, trying to wake him. He groans and moves his arm from over his eyes. "May you kindly move from the bench."

"Why should I do that?" he ask in a sleepy voice.

"So I can sit down," I say in a duh voice.

"You can sit on the floor." I look down at him. Is he seriously going to do this? It takes me a bit, but I figure something out.

"If you don't move I can't play."

"You stand and play the violin."

"I was planning on playing the piano today," I bluff. He hesitates for a moment but sits up. He gives me a stern look as if saying, you better not make me move for nothing.

I have been planning on a change of instrument this week. I go over to the shelf and grab a curtain sheet and Shuu fully rises from the seat. I think this one will make us both happy, it's both classical and my favorite piano piece.

I set up the sheet, but I have no plan on using it. I lift up the cover and tap each key, making sure that it makes the proper tune.

Once everything is in check I begin. My fingers flow on the keys, so smooth it doesn't even feel as if I'm pressing them. The air is filled with the melodic sound as I play. The beginning is simple, but towards the one minute mark, the tune changes. It goes from light and elegant to a bit more cheerful. I play this part with a growing smile. I love how this piece changes multiple times. I soon go back to the usual, smooth one. I look up at Shuu and smile, but his eyes are closed and he slowly sways with the music.

I finish the piece in a couple of minutes and get up. Shuu final opens his eyes and look down at me. "Don't I get to eat my snack?"

He shrugs and goes over to his usual spot lays. I open my bag and take out a container of vegetables.

"Have any wine to go with that?" he ask from the couch.

"Hmm, sadly I don't," I say with a smile, biting on a carrot. "What exactly happened that night?"

"You don't remember?"

"I just remember that I threw a glass across the floor and I was talking to a bottle." He snickers a bit. It was the first time I've seen him actually smile, and I never expected any kind of laugh from him.

"That was a bit funny. I just took you to your room." He took me to my room. I woke up in my pajamas, though. Wait a moment! I choke on my carrot and begin to cough.

"Did you change my clothes?" I say between coughs. He doesn't respond. I suddenly feel really uncomfortable being in here with him. Has he been the one changing my clothes this whole time?

If that's the case, he's seen me body, my scares. Oh no, please tell me he only changed my clothes and nothing else. I suddenly feel naked and cross my arms over my stomach.

"Don't act like that," he says. "I'm not a psycho perv like Laito and Ayato." I look over at him. He doesn't seem sincere, but I don't see him finding any sexual interest in anyone, especially me. I relax and finish my snack and turn back around to face the piano.

I play 'Fur Elise' one more time before changing to a song from the top of my head. I don't feel like going to the shelf, right next to Shuu. I mess up a few times, but I still refuse to get up. The bell rings and I gather my stuff.

I look at him one more time before leaving the room. I make it to the end of the hall before I'm stopped. In front of me are Haru and Keita. I freeze in my tracks and stare at them.

"Hey, Hikari," Keita say as if we were the best of friends.

"What do you want?" I say with an embarrassing squeak.

"We wanted to apologize for what happened last week," Haru says behind his friend. "Can you please just listen to us?" he asked stepping closer to me. A wave of fear washes over me. I don't want to be over here, I really don't want to recreate last week's events.

"Go away," I plea.

"Just listen," he says, grabbing my wrist. My eyes grow wide. I try to pull from him, but he won't let go of me.

"Let go of me!" I cry. Fear surges through me. I feel my hand begin to shake within his grip. I don't want to go back down this path. I envision myself in the next few minutes, a bruised body lying in the hall.

"God, you guys are annoying. I can hear you from the room," a voice complains. I look up to see Shuu tightly squeezing Haru wrist. How did he get over here so fast? The vampire's eyes glare down at Haru, the look itself filled with enough venom to kill a man. "Is there a reason that you guys are making so much noise?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song Hikari played is Beethoven's Fur Elise, pretty well known. If you don't know it by title, look it up and listen to it. I’m sure you will recognize it.


	15. Sorrow

"Is there a reason that you guys are making so much noise?" Shuu asks, giving Haru the most menacing glare I have ever seen. I'm more frightened by Shuu at this point then both of the boys. Haru releases my wrist and I pull it back and rub it. I look down and see the Shuu is still gripping Haru's wrist tightly.

"Dude, please let go," he pleas. "I let go of the girl, 'kay?" Shuu releases him and looks down at me.

"What did you do to make them come after you again?" Shuu asks, sounding more alert. Almost as if he is actually concerned. Wait, he knows about last week?

"We just wanted to talk," Keita says, walking closer.

"So you ambush me?" I counter, surprising myself how hateful and strong it sounded. Yeah, my voice sounds much stronger than I feel. The sound of the bell echoes through the hall. "And you make me late for class."

"Sorry about that."

"So what is it?"

"Oh, yeah," Haru says as if you just remembered what he had to say. "Um, can he, uh..." I look over to Shuu, who is staring daggers into him.

"Don't mind him."

"Again we wanted to apologize for last week," Keita starts. "We acted stupid and our emotions kind of took over."

"You already said that, is that all?"

"We just want answers, some closure. Kaname's death hurt us also." I almost laugh. They don't know how much his death hurt for me, both physically and mentally. "We only want to know what happened."

I debate over this. Should I tell them what happened? If Natsume didn't want them to know, I shouldn't tell them. Why I'm I thinking about him, he doesn't control me anymore. Maybe just giving them a bit of information will satisfy their hunger for closure. I start to walk to the music room. I turn around and tell them to follow me. They look at Shuu and follow me. I sit on the piano bench and they stand. "What exactly do you want to know?"

"Is Kaname alive?" Keita asks first. A lump forms in my throat just hearing his name. I shake my head, afraid that my voice would tremble verbally answering them. They both look down, sadness painted across their face.

"How do you even know them? They were three grade ahead of us."

"Uh, about that," Haru says. "I have a late birthday and was held back twice. Same with him," he nods to Keita. "I met Kaname through my sister, they dated for a bit. Before, you know..." His sister dated Kaname? What was her name again, Nami? Nagami?

"How is she, uh, Nanami I believe," I question. Haru looks down at his feet. His eyes begin to water and I instantly regret asking. "You don't have to ans-"

"No, it's okay." He pulls his wallet out of his pocket and opens it. He takes out a picture and gives it to me. The girl has long, straight, black hair. Unlike her brother, has green eyes. She stands next to a boy that looks like Haru if he was a few years younger. The girl in the photo looks my age, which is weird. Shouldn't she be like twenty, twenty-one? It takes me a bit, but I remember where I've seen her before. Kaname had a picture of them together on his nightstand.

"She was an amazing sister," Haru says, voice low. "After hearing the new about Kaname, she was super depressed. Soon one night she drank too much and passed out. That morning she wasn't in her room. There was a note, though. It was a goodbye note. We search the house and noticed that her car was gone. Hours later an officer came to our house and told us that Nanami was found in the creek. Everyone thought it was an accident, but our family knew what happened, she committed suicide. That was the place her and Kaname first met, so I guess that's where she decides to end the suffering."

I never knew they were related. I never did call either Haru or Keita by their last names. Maybe if I did, the name Akita would finally flip the switch of recognition in my mind and I would link the two together.

Tears fill both Haru and Keita's eyes. "I'm sorry about your sister," I say after a while. I feel like crying also. More people hurt because of that night, because of me.

"Like Natsume said, Kaname died in an accident. That's all that happened. What followed was just Natsume's way of dealing with depression." I get up, hand him the picture and grab my bag; I can't take this.

All of this because of me, because I could move away from a target. All Kaname wanted to do was save me, but it made so many people suffer. Why couldn't I just shot and died that day? No one would have cared. The only people that may have cared would have been the twins, but that's it. I walk to the door and turn back to them "I hope you guys are better know."

"Wait, Hikari," Keita says. "Thank you so much. We promise to leave you alone."

I look at the boys, tears running down their faces'. The hurt and sorrow flowing from them. I try to stay strong and not show my own sadness. With all my willpower, I mustered up a smile and say, "You're welcome."

I make my way to Home Ed with a feeling of sadness and relief. It's hard talking about Kaname, but I'm happy that I was able to speak to people who actually knew him. It's one thing to talk to Yui about him, someone that can only make a person based on what I've told her. Keita and Haru actually knew him, laughed, cried, and hung out with him.

I make it to the classroom and open the door. All heads turn to me and some people begin to whisper. Seems like I've gone from invisible to the only thing people can focus on within a day.

I apologize for being late with no note. I take a seat in the back by myself as the teacher continues talking about some Arab chicken and rice dish we'll be making tomorrow.

I try to focus, but my mind drifts to other places. To the days at the mansion with the twins, the happy days.

_It is 1:26 am and I'm pacing the room. They said they were going be home by 11:30, but they weren't. I ate dinner by myself in silence. They told me that they were going out for dinner, but I still don't like eating alone, I already do it every weekday morning._

_I tried to play the piano, but I couldn't focus. What if something happened to them? What if the people Father had trouble with got them? What if they come here and I'm the only one here? Well, I know where the emergency room is and there are guards here, but still. I walk to Kaname's room and look out the window. It's pitch black outside, no headlights._

_I collapse on his bed and look at his bedside nightstand. He has three pictures on it, each in its own frame._

_There is a family photo in a simple black rectangle one. I look at his mother. She has the same blue eyes as the twins and curly hair. They told me she was an American. Their dad stares sternly into the camera. I bet the photographer was terrified. The boys are in the middle, smiling wide._

_The next picture is in a more elegant one frame. It is a circular one with gems on it, a bit girly. It is a picture of Kaname and a girl, Nanami. She has her arms around his neck smiling widely. He looks at her instead of the camera, as is he couldn't change is attention on anything but his smiling girlfriend._

_The last one is fairly new, it is one of me and the twins. We took it on my fourteenth birthday. I was so upset because every year Yui and I would take pictures on our birthdays, but this was my first without her. Her own birthday will soon pass, and there would be one less person in her own picture. The twins felt bad and decide to keep the tradition alive. I stand between the twins in the pink dress Kaname gave me._

_Light soon floods through the window and I jump off the bed. I run downstairs with lightning speed. The door opens and I tackle Natsume. He is taking by surprise and loses balance. He catches himself and look down at me. "Welcome home, Master Natsume," I say smiling._

_"Hey, Hikari," he says patting my head. Kaname comes in soon after and I give him the same welcome._

_"What took you so long, Master Natsume?" I make a disappointed face and cross my arms like he does with me when he's mad. He raises his eyebrow and I drop the act. Out of all things, Natsume hates disrespect and mockery the most._

_"We went out to eat and go to karaoke like planned," he says looking over to his brother._

_"We kind of lost a bet and we had to pay the penalty," Kaname finishes. I cock my head, not getting where they're going. Natsume and Kaname start walking to their rooms and I follow. They go into Natsume's room and look at each other._

_Simultaneously they take off their shirts. I gasp in awe at their exposed backs. On Natsume's right shoulder blade and Kaname's left there's is a wing. Natsume's is just an outline, but Kaname's is filled in black. They are so cool. I walk closer and touch them both and Kaname flinches._

_"Sorry, Master Kaname," I say moving my hands away. He slaps Natsume on the back of his head._

_"I said to stop making her call me that," he says playfully. He turns to me and smiles. "It's fine, it just stings. It's going to be like that for about a week or so._

_"You wimp," Natsume says._

_"Well, I'm not the one that took painkillers." I giggle at their bickering. Seeing them like this makes me feel so happy._

_"Can I have one?" I ask. They look down at me and then at each other._

_"I don't think so Hikari," Natsume says. "Maybe another day, but not now. I don't think you're ready from something like this yet."_

_I look down in disappointment. "Oh, okay. I see."_

_"Come on, Natsume," his brother says. "Give her something small, it fine."_

_That night Kaname was able to convince Natsume to let me get a tattoo. I wasn't allowed to leave the estate, so it was going to be down there. That weekend Natsume came in with an ink gun. He hooks it up in the music room._

_I jump around with joy as he gets things set up. He has been talking about how he has been learning and practicing all week. He said he can only do somethings small. I get in the chair and with a stupid grin._

_"So what do you want?" he says. "Something small, remember."_

_"Yes, I know, Master Natsume," I say. "I've been thinking about it all week. I want a cherry blossom and under or near it I want your name." He widens his eyes in surprise._

_"You want my name tattooed on your body?"_

_"Yes, Master."_

_"You know this is permanent?"_

_"Yes, Master."_

_"Do you want it somewhere noticeable?"_

_"No, Master. I want it somewhere only you can see it." He thinks this over for a bit and tells me to take off my pants and put my legs over the arms of the chair. I've been completely naked in front of him multiple times and even done sexual things, but it's still embarrassing being fully exposed to him._

_I take them off and do as he says. After he preps the area on my thigh he wants to work with, he starts._

_I don't know what it would feel like, but I didn't expect it. It felt like getting pitched over and over again. He takes his time with everything. He was an amazing artist, so I don't think it would be anything short of amazing. It takes about an hour and a half for him to finish. My legs have gone numb by now._

_Kaname joins us with sandwiches and peers at my tattoo. "Whose idea was this?" he ask. Not in a 'what the hell?' kind of tone, but a 'huh?' way._

_"It was my idea, Master Kaname."_

_"Fair enough." He takes a big bite out of his sandwich before he can say anything else._

_I look from one brother to the other. "Master Kaname, Master Natsume, please be honest with me. Do you think it's stupid?" I start to pull on my hair, a habit I have not been able to shed since I was little._

_Natsume takes me by the chin and turns my head. He leans in and kisses me. I'm hesitant at first but soon kiss back. It's not a French kiss or a totally make out one, but a passionate on. He pulls away and rests his forehead against mines. He gazes into my pink eyes, I stare back into his sapphire blue ones._

_"I couldn't be happier that you wanted my name, out everything you could have picked. It means a lot."_

"Black and purple zig-zags, very interesting," a voice says behind me. I snap out of my trance and look behind me. Laito is pulling at the back of my skirt, exposing my underwear. My face flushes and I swat his hand. "You have a very good taste in underwear. Do have any lace ones?"

"What the hell, Laito?" I say, placing my hands on my skirt hem. "What was that for?"

"You were staring off into space all class and I couldn't get your attention. So what better way than harassment." I look around the room and notice that everyone has left or is leaving. Was I really daydreaming all class long? "You should be happy you snapped out when you did, or I would have gone to more drastic measures." With that, he slides his hands under my arms and gropes my left breast. I jump up and bang into the table. A couple of students look over at us.

"Stop that, Laito," I hiss.

"Easy there girl." His smile turns into a wicked grin and he glares at me. "Don't forget I still get to punish you."

I look down to what should be a blank page in my notebook. Instead, there is a single drawing, a cherry blossom. I go over it with my finger a few times. It looks exactly like the one on my thigh, the one Natsume did. I see Laito peer over my shoulder and I slam the book closed. I grab my bag and begin to walk out the room.

"Don't leave me like that Hikari." He pretends to be hurt. "We are going to the same place."

I groan at the thought of another class with Laito. He walks next to me with his hands in his pockets. "What were you thinking about? Was it me?"

"Why would you think that?"

"You were smiling like a fool."

I glare at him. "No, I wasn't thinking of you, and it's not your business."

"Was it about your 'Master Kei?" he say, using air quotes.

"Why would you think that?"

"You were doodling the same flower on your thigh, the one right next to the one that say 'Natsume.'"

"I can't draw flowers?" I counter. "God, can you just leave me alone?" I quicken my speed and to get to the room fast. Why does he always bother me? I don't want to be his friend, but why does he have to annoy me every time I see him? Can't he just leave me alone?

I walk into the room and take a seat. I sit down in a seat in the back row. I want to lay my head down and go to sleep, but I can't. I need to try to focus on school.

* * *

 

I lay on my bed and gaze at my work. I have extra work from history and Home Ed for missing class. I was barely paying attention and only know about half the stuff. I want to throw it all out the window and scream. I know that I wanted to go to school for years, but I don't know if it's worth it.

I remember the plan I made for myself. I need to focus on school so I can go to a college and escape this hell hole.

There's a knock on the door and I tell the person to come in. To my surprise, Kanato is the one that enters my room. I sit up and look at him. As always, he's clenching his bear. I guess he's here to punish me, why else would he come in? I haven't talked to him since I gave him the macaroons the other day.

"Hi, Kanato," I say as he closes the door.

"Hello, Hikari," he responds, looking at me with his wide purple eyes. "I've come to inform you about your punishment." I swing my legs so they're hanging off the side of my bed. I nod. I have no idea what his has in stored, but I can't protest. "I want you to give me a bath."

I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding in. A bath? Do these brothers even know has punishment works? I'm no masochist, but I know this isn't how it works. Doing a small thing and embarrassing acts doesn't increase my regret of yelling at them.

I look over to my opened book "Um, do you want one now, or after din-"

"Now." He turns to leave and say, "Bring your stuff. You're joining me." He opens the door and walks out. I sit there for a bit, pondering about his punishment. He doesn't just want me to bathe him, but also join him. I actually don't think that he has any sexual thought in mind. If he wanted to have sex or whatever, I doubt he would try to hide it with an excuse such as this one. And if he does, then he did a poor job hiding.

I touch my stomach with discomfort. If he wants to bathe with me, then he's going to see my scars. I try to forget about it. Shuu, Laito, and Ayato have already seen them and Reiji knows about them.

I go to my bathroom and get my things. I go to my drawer and get some house clothes, wanting to change from my uniform. I get the map Yui drew me from my nightstand and follow it Kanato's room.

I get there pretty fast. I knock and enter the room. The room is just as I saw it the second day I was here. Toys litter the floor near the bed and there's a table with a tea set on it in the corner. Most people would be surprised to know this is a room of a seventeen-year-old. I don't believe that he is a few months older than me. Weird.

I walk to the bathroom door and knock on it. I hear Kanato tell me to enter from the other side. I open the door to see him stripping off his uniform. I turn away to give him his privacy. The only sound is the running bath water.

I begin to discard my clothes as well. I remove my tie, jacket, shirt, skirt, and socks. I turn to see Kanato only his boxer staring at me.

This is the most awkward feeling ever! I stand there in my underwear for a bit, mentally preparing myself. I unclip my bra and wrap my towel around myself. I slide off my panties. I fold all my clothes and put them next to the door. I notice that Teddy is by the door also. I guess he really like his bear.

I turn to see Kanato kneeling by the tub. He is hanging over the side and has his hand in it. His body is slim and pale. I walk over and sit on the tub side. I turn off the water once it's about full. The tub is surprisingly big, enough room for two.

"Ready?" I say, looking at the purple hair vampire. He nods his head and stands up. He removes his shorts and steps in the tub. I remove the towel and slide in also. We sit in silence for a bit.

"How did you get those scars?" he ask, filling the empty silence.

"My previous...guardian was a bit of a sadist and occasionally took his anger out on me."

"Did he hate you?" His question feels like a gunshot to my heart.

"I'm not quite sure." How doesn't ask another question and the room is quiet once more. I begin to hum a bit.

"Do you sing?"

"I do sometimes. When I'm bored, or wh-"

"Sing something," he demands. I think over the songs I know. I know many, but I try to find one appropriate for the mood. I sing lightly and my voice echo off the bathroom walls. I usually sing this song while playing the piano, but it just felt like the right time to sing it. I sway as I as the words flow from my lips. At the parts that I just say 'Ah', I hear Kanato softly sing with me. I finish the song and we just look at each other.

"You sing?"

He lowers himself more in the tub. "Not anymore."

"Why not, you sound lovely."

"It's too hard."

"What do you me-"

"Leave it alone!" he shouts. I nod.

"I think it's about time for me to wash you." He steps out of the tub and I follow. I get his luffa and soap. I proceed in washing him. It feels weird washing a boy that is fully capable of doing said task, but this is my punishment.

I left his arms to get his sides and he stares down at me. I finish washing his upper half and ask him to spread his legs so I can clean them. He does without hesitation. I wash his legs and the sides of his thighs. Without me asking, he stands up. I go over his butt and back of his legs. I get to his member and he steps away from me, eyes wider than usual.

"Why would you touch such a place?" he ask. Seriously? We were just in the tub naked, and know you're getting embarrassed? Will, at least that confirms my theory that he wasn't planning to get down 'n' dirt.

"I was just washing you."

"Do you have no shame?" Another shot. I do have shame in stuff, but going over your private with a luffa doesn't trigger it. I didn't even touch it.

"I'm sorry," is all I say. I look down at the floor. I hear him get back into the bath. I go to my bath bucket out my own luffa. I begin to clean my body. I feel so strange washing in front of Kanato, I guess it really is a punishment.

I can feel his eye burning holes into my neck. I want to finish as quickly as possible. I begin to wash my shoulders, but my luffa is taken from me. I look behind me to see Kanato sitting behind me. He begins to wash my back. "Oh, thank you. You really don't hav-"

"Be quiet," he says in a flat voice. He stops and I feel his hands slide across my side to my stomach. He leans against me and begins to trace my scars with his finger tip. It feels nice, but I begin to worry. Is this going to end like it did with brothers?

He licks my neck and bites. I wish I would wash it first to prevent this. I whimper as he gulps down my blood. He releases me from his bite, and I hear him whisper something. I know he isn't talking to me, but to someone else far away.

I'm about to question him, but he bites back down on my neck, right next to the previous one and I yelp in pain. He moves a hand to my breast. I want to move it, but I feel powerless. He fondles my right, sending me a wave of pleasure. He pinches my nipple and pulls it, making me gasp. I can feel his member hardening against my back.

He stops sucking my neck and let's go of my breast. I turn to see him walking to the door and getting his towel. What the hell? He leaves the bathroom, leaving me in utter confusion. Should I be happy?

I stay there for a bit but snap out of it. I finish washing, dry off and put on my clothes. I get my things and leave the bathroom. I see Kanato sitting on his bed, holding his bear tightly. I stand, not wanting to risk getting too close to him

"I told her that I loved her only. That I would only make love with her," he says.  _I won't call what happened in there 'making love'_. But who is he talking about? "I feel so disgusted with myself. No, with you." He looks up at me with anger in his eyes. "Were you trying to seduce me you, shameless whore? Showing off your body part and touching mine."

I want to scream at him, let him know it was all his idea. That I didn't touch him and he was the one who touched me. I hold back. I look at him. He looks so sad, I pity him. He feels as if he betrayed someone, and I know his sorrow.

I look down at my feet, not wanting to catch his hateful gaze. "I'm sorry for doing such things." We stay quiet for a bit, his cold eyes burning me.

He takes a bunny from his bed and hurls it at me."Just leave!" he screams.

Without hesitation, I leave the room and begin to walk to my room. Even being away from him, I feel his eyes on me, his words echo in my head. They words weighed down with sorrow and regret:  _I'm so sorry Cordelia, your songbird has betrayed you._


	16. Trust

**Yui's POV**

"You want to know what?" I ask my sister, completely astonished. What has gotten into her? She only has two extremes: not wanting to be near the vampires or wanting to know something about one of them. And if she does go with the ladder, she doesn't give me a reason why.

"I want to know about the vampires' past," Hikari says through hopeful eyes. "You've been here for a while, so you should know  _some_ stuff about them."

"Well, I do know a bit, but it's not like they each gave me an autobiography of their lives."

_No, instead I saw these weird visions one night. It ended up just being the triplet's died mother showing their past. Also, I have said mother's heart inside of me._

A chill runs up my spin as I think about what happened a while ago. I look down at my science work in front.

"So can you tell me what you know?" She puts her hand over my notes and I look up at her.  _Why is she so persistent?_

"Why do you even care?"

"They seem to know more about me than they should, yet I know little to nothing about them. I just want to have some kind of ground to stand on when it comes to their past."

I do want to tell her about them. I don't want to  _not_ tell her, I have the power to. They never told me I couldn't share what I know. If I don't tell her at all, I'm going to feel guilty.

I tell her the basics about the boys. How their mothers treated them, how they were towards each other, nothing deep. Telling her only made me feels sick.

Just speaking about Cordelia makes me shake. I'm so happy I was able to get rid of her. I remember when I woke up on that couch, all six vampires staring at me. I don't even remember what happen next, all I know is that they said I went vampire. I still don't believe them. I later woke up in my bed and Subaru was sitting in the chair by me. I didn't have fangs or the urge to suck blood. I don't tell Hikari this, it really doesn't matter.

"Anything else about this Cordelia?" Hikari asked after I finished giving her the basic run down.

"She was the triplet's mother, what else do you want to know?"

"Did she have a…" she pauses, as if to find the right phrase, " _special_  relationship with the boys?"

I raise an eyebrow at her. What does she know about this? "I can't say I know about a 'special relationship' among them. She was their mom, I don't think motherly love is that special."

"'Was'. What happened? Did she die, how?"

I bit my lip. "The, um, the triplets…killed her." Hikari's curious smile fades and she stares at me in horror.

"They killed their own mother? Why?"

"I don't know." We're silent for a bit. I look down at my work. Hikari looks up at the ceiling.

"How do you even know all of this? Like you said, I don't expect them to tell you such personal information."

I mentally curse myself for being so careless about such information. I try to conder up a lie, but my door opens and in walks Subaru. I sigh with relief, happy I no longer have to answer her questions.

"Laito wants you, Yui," he says sliding his hands into his pockets. And looks at me. I uneasily get off my bed and Hikari follows. "I need to talk with you, Hikari."

I turn to Hikari, who is as surprised as me. She nods and sits in the chair next my bed. I walk to the door away and look up at the white hair vampire, he doesn't meet my gaze. I begin to the direction of his room, but Subaru calls out, "he's in the kitchen."

I get to the kitchen to see Laito sitting on the corner doing a crossword puzzle. I have come to realize that he's quite fond of them and would spend his free time doing them- if he isn't already harassing someone.

He looks up and smiles. "Bitch-chan, you made it. You were taking such a long time, I was thinking that Subaru forgot to tell you I wanted you."  _Or I would have just stayed in the room with my sister._

"What do you need me for me, Laito?" I say with a sigh.

"Why are you being so mean? I'm trying to help you. You haven't started on dinner yet," he says gesturing at the empty kitchen. "Reiji will be very upset if you don't get started soon."

I look at him with a confused expression. "But Reiji cooks tonight."

"I didn't tell you?" He smirks, setting his book and pen down. "I told Reiji you would be preparing dinner tonight."

"You what!?" I want to accuse him of lying, but it doesn't seem likely. Reiji would have started on dinner long ago. Panic runs through me, he really did set me up.

I look to the clock, 6:53 pm. I have just over forty minutes! I frantically savage the kitchen, taking in the everything I have to work with. I quickly collect the ingredients for curry, a quick dish. I begin to cut the meat into small chunks.

I look up and scowl at Laito. How dare he does this to me? Not only did he schedule me to cook, something I totally wasn't prepared for, but he didn't tell me until I had less than an hour.

I get everything on the stove in less than ten minutes. I turn the temperature up as high as I can, hoping it will cook fast enough. I start the rice and walk to the island.

I sit on the stool and rub my temples, why Laito, why?  _All I want is for you to stop all of this crap and leave me alone. You live to bother others. I wonder how the other brides handled you. Did any of them just slap him in the face?_

"Baby pink, really?" I look behind me to see Laito pulling my shorts down, studying my underwear. I jump off the seat and back away bit. I look at him with shock and embarrassment.

He shakes his head in disappointment. "You should take some tips from your sister. Now she has some really sexy panties. Yours, on the other hand, are so...girly."

_You're such a perv._

"I'm a  _what_?" he says, his face becoming stern and angered. I cover my mouth, I said it out loud.

"I-I'm sorry," I stutter out.

He smirks at me. "It's okay, everyone makes mistakes." He comes closer and I tense. He envelopes his arms around me, and leans into my ear. "But you must be punishment to make sure you don't make the same one again."

He slides his hands into my shorts and squeeze my butt. The gesture causes me to gasp in shock. He takes his hands out and picks me up, putting me on the island.

He pulls up my shirt and bra and begins to massage my breast. My face heats up, cheeks pink with embarrassment. He pinches my nipples, causing me to whimper. He twists and pulls at it making me cry out in pain. He pulls so hard, it feels as if he's going to rip it off.

He smirks at my suffering. He leans in and bites right under my collar bone. He licks up the remaining blood. "Laito, please stop. You're hurting me," I whimper.

"This is a punishment," he says as he bites into my breast. He twists my nipples even harder, sending me another wave of pain. "Do you want to be pleasured?"

He stops twisting and starts to gently massage it again. I hate how he plays with my emotions and feeling. His finger softly gropes my breast, easing the pain.

He moves down and sinks his fangs into my thigh. He rubs my other thigh and slides his hand through the leg hole of my shorts. I feel his cold fingers trace the hem of my panties.

"You say it hurts, yet you're wet. I didn't know you were such a masochist." He rubs my private, making me moan slightly. He smiles and begins to undo my pants. I finally begin to realize what exactly is happening.

"Laito, no!" I say looking over at the door. "This is the  _kitchen_. You can't do that  _here._ Anyone can come in."

"Then we better be quick. Besides, you don't want to burn your food."

"Again, Laito, we're in the  _kitchen_. This is where you make food. I place that needs to stay  _clean._ "

"You're going to need to get some cleaning done after this." He pulls off my shorts, exposing my underwear. I bring my legs together, trying to hide my exposed body. He separates them with ease. "Don't be so shy."

He slides my panties to the side and I blush intensely. He easily slides two fingers into me, making me want to scream. It doesn't hurt, but I don't want to have sex again.

I hear footsteps walking into the dining room, making me panic. "Laito, we have to stop, now!" I harshly whisper.

"Why would we do that?"

"It's almost time to eat and someone is going to come in. Please Laito. I...we…." I try to find something to make him stop. "Please stop. We..we can finish this later." He looks at me with surprise eyes, but then begins to smile.

"Okay, Bitch-chan." He gets off the counter and walks to the door. He glances at me and licks his fingers. "We'll finish this later."

He casually walks out, as if nothing happens. I quickly get up and fix my clothes, disgusted with myself. I go to the sink and wash my hands over and over with scalding hot water.  _I_  didn't do anything, so why do I feels so filthy?

I go back to the stove and turn it off. I prepare the plates and take the food out. I serve everyone and sit next to Hikari. She sits by Subaru, but her chair is as far away as possible from him. I wonder what they conversed about.

We begin to eat and Ayato reports that the curry is a bit over down. I glare at Laito, who smiles slightly, and apologize.

I eat quickly and go to my room. I collapse on my bed, causing my papers and books to launch off of it and onto the floor. I close my eyes and sleep takes me.

* * *

 

"What do you even do during lunch?" I question my sister. We sit together in literature, working on our report. The day has been dragging on and on, every second feeling like an eternity.

"Well," Hikari begins, "I eat a snack in the courtyard, no reason to have a full meal if there's a fifty percent chance I'll be eating in Home Ed. Then I go to the library. I do like to read, so I spend sometime in there. If I don't go to the library, I just wander around the school some. I really didn't want to tell Ayato. If he knew where I was at any given time, he would use it to his advantage. I'm going to the library today, though."

I nod. That is completely understandable. I would hate to be vulnerable to a stuck up vampire. He always wants to be the center of attention. He had so much attention as a child, so why does he continue to seek ours?

I turn to look at the redhead, he's playing with the lead of his pencil. He catches my gaze and I turn around. The bell soon rings through the school, signaling the change of class. I gather my belonging, say goodbye to Hikari, and head to the courtyard.

It doesn't take long for me to spot Subaru, his snow white hair acting as a target. We haven't spoken to each other since yesterday's brief encounter in my room.

I call his name and wave to him. He simply looks up from the ground and gives me a nod. He sits on the edge of the small wall of a stairway of the courtyard.

Any person can tell he's a loner. The other students give him weird looks and avoid him. They rather walk to the other stairs the cross his path.

I sort of pity him. He always said he never needed anyone, especially a girl, yet seeing him by himself so often made me feel horrible.

The feeling of not doing something when there's no reason not to makes me feel like a horrible person. Over time, even though it was hard, he slowly became comfortable around me. I wouldn't say we're 'friends', but we do share a bond.

"What's been going on?" I ask sitting next to him.

"Nothin'," he say in response. I opening my bag and retrieve a box of pocky. I open it and place it between us, and he takes one immediately.

We set in silence, but there's no need to fill it. I gaze at the passing students. A few eye me oddly, but I'm fine with it. When I first started to converse with Subaru, many people thought it was odd. No one spoke to him, and then out of nowhere, then new girl started to sit with him everyday.

"Yui, how do you feel about Hikari?" Subaru ask. The question takes me by surprise. Does this have to do with their talk yesterday?

"Well, I love her; she's my older sister," I say looking up at the night sky. "I'm so happy that we're reunited. I do think she is a bit…different then I remember, but we all change. I do believe that she can be strange at times, but I think it's because of her past and sudden change of environment. She is kind and truthful to me, that's what really matters." I lump begins to form in my throat and my vision blurs with tear.

"To be honest, I almost forgot all about her, and that hurts me inside. I don't think I could ever forgive myself for forgetting my one and only sister. How did I just leave things in a mess and never question it?"

I cover my face with my hands and sob. How could I just have left my memories of her in the past when she clung to the hope of seeing me every day? I feel horrible thinking about it. Her life was a living hell, and it only unfolded that way because she was willing to protect me.

I feel a hand touch my head and I look up at Subaru. He doesn't look at me, but at the ground, and is slightly pink in the cheeks.

"God, Yui," he sighs. "I asked you how do you feel about your sister, not a confusion of guilt." I wipe away my tears and smile at him. He sounds rude, but I know that this is his way of showing affection.

I can tell by his pink tinted cheeks that he is embarrassed about the results of his question. I sniffle a few times and wipe my eyes a final time.

"I'm fine, totally fine."

"Never asked."

We finish our pocky in silence. I notice students start to get ready for their next class. I slide off the stone wall and up the stairs. I turn back and give my awkward companion a wave.

He raises his hand in response and slides off the wall himself. We walk down the walkway from each other, heading down our own paths.

I make it to History as the bell screaming, calling the students to class. I take my seat in the middle of the class.

Students soon flow into the class. Among them I see a fedora wearing vampire who gazes at me.

I look down at my open book, trying not to give Laito any of my attention. I hear the chair next to me slide across the floor and someone sit on it.

"How are you today, Bitch-chan?" he coos. I don't reply, I rather not converse with him now. The tardy bell soon rings and the teacher begins class. The teacher has us present our projects to the class. One by one each group or pair goes to the front.

I cringe when she calls Laito and me up. To my surprise, he lets me present without interruption. He adds his two cents every now and then, to make it look like he knows what he's talking about. We are told to set back down and I eye him, knowing he's planning something.

After everyone is done the teacher gives us the other part of the project. She tell us what we need to do, and we begin. I notice that I need some research material, and ask her if I could go to the library. Library. Hikari would be there. She gives me the permission, and I go back to my desk to get my stuff. I see Laito getting up also.

"So, the library?" he asks stretching.

"I never invited you," I coldly snap.

"Fortunately for me, I'm your partner. So it would only make sense for me to go." This conniving, little jerk!

With an exasperated sigh, I get up and leave the room. I hear his footsteps behind me. Why must he do this to me? I want to go back to class, but the hope of seeing Hikari for a bit pulls me closer to the library.

We arrive and I begin to scan the area for my sister. I look down aisles, in the tech zone, and even ask the librarian, but Hikari isn't here.

Maybe she's still in the courtyard. I look over at the clock. No, she would've been here by now. Maybe she isn't coming. But she told me she was coming today, so why isn't she here? I try to focus on finding a book for the project, but the thought lingers in my mind.

"Why don't you try looking over here, Bitch-can," Laito calls from the corner of the library. I hate that nickname even more when he says it out loud in public. But, wow, he is actually trying to help. I walk over to where his voice came from, but can't find him.

"Laito?" I softly call out. I turn to see him right in front of me. I take a few steps back out out of shock, and bump into a table. He walks closer to me, pressing his body against mines. "L-Laito, w-what are you doing?" I say as I uselessly try to push him off of me.

"We were never able to finish what we started last night," he whispers into my ear, causing my hair to stand up on the back of my neck.

Does he have no filter for his action? We are at school, in the freaking library, why would he even  _think_  about doing such things here?  _Because he's a pervert._ He licks my ear, causing me to gasp.  _What the heck Yui, get a hold of yourself._

"Laito, please stop. I don't want to do this, especially not here."

"Did Reiji ever punish you for tricking us about that meeting?" Well that was out of the blue. Why would he care about it?

"Uh, no. But what does th-" I'm interrupted as he slides his hand into my skirt. He softly touches my thigh with his slender fingers, giving me goosebumps.

"Then consider this punishment." I feel him move his fingers over to my panties and rub me. The sensation is perfect, but I have to stop. "You should be happy, I'm not really even punishing you. I can tell that you enjoying this, wanting every moment to last longer, for every movement to be more pleasurable. I was the one being punished yesterday. Do you know how hard it was to hide my boner from my brothers?"

He moves his fingers under my panties to rub me directly. My knees soon turn to jelly and my breath becomes short, hard gasps.

"Please L-Laito, I don't want this," I say, feeling like about to collapse. I clench onto him, not able to stand due to the weight of pleasure pulling me down.

"Are you sure, Bitch-chan? You seem to really be enjoying this." To prove his point, he takes his hand out of my underwear to revolve his two fingers covered in my juice. He licks his fingers with a moan and I fall to the floor.

How, how could I let this happen? He has me dancing in the palm of his hand. But why? Why am I enjoying what should me my torment? I stand back up and look that vampire in his eyes, his emerald orbs filled with lust.

"I want to stop this Laito," I say. My stomach twisted in a knot. "I'm done being your sexual play thing, so just leave me alone. I know this breaks our deal, but I'm sick of it."

He's smile fades, his faces painted with shock. He soon recovers his jerkish facade. "You know if you do this, then I can do  _whatever_  I want to Hikari?"

I grit my teeth in anger. This bastard is trying to guilt trip me. "Yes, I do. But I know she has been through much more, and she can stand up to a monster like you."

But I don't know that. I feel like a disgrace, how could I do this to Hikari? I don't want this anymore, so I just push it onto my sister who went through already. I'm a horrible person and I hope she can forgive me, even though I could never forgive myself. He comes closer to me, so close that our lips are only a few centimeters apart.

"One shouldn't deceive one's self. I know that you enjoy this. The way I touch your body, that I know all of your weak spots. You look forward to this. Because deep down inside, you're a true masochist and you enjoy every second, yearning for more."

The anger inside me boils to an all time high. I start to see red and I can no longer control my limbs. How dare he says that. He doesn't know me, and I would never want such disgusting things. He thinks he can talk to me like that just because I'm not as strong as him. That I'm just a small human girl.

I don't even notice myself lifting up my hand, not until it comes in contact with the vampire's face. The thing that broke my angry trance is the loud smack of my limb on his flesh.

I stay still, paralyzed with shock. How could I do that? Laito seems to have the same question on his mind. We look at each other with the same expression. My shock is soon replaced with fear as the vampire's expression changes. He goes from awestruck to infuriated in a split second.

I soon remember how to use my legs and I begin to sprint out the library. I hear the librarian call out to me, but it's all just a huge blur.

Why would I do such a thing? Slapping someone, especially Laito. I head down the halls, having no clear destination, just anywhere away from Laito. I stop to catch my breath.

I hear the soft sound of music from farther down the hall. A piano and violin. The song smoothing and happy. From what I hear it sounds like a duet, a live one. Something about the notes make it feel as if it isn't on some kind of recording.

The sound draws me nearer. I begin to realize what is being played, "Spring Sonata" one of Beethoven's works. I walk down the hall and notice that no one else is around. Well, it is in the middle of class.

I soon recognized the way to the room from memory. Just like I believed, it was coming from the music room. But there isn't any classes, I heard the music teacher wasn't teaching this year.

I walk to the door and peer into the room through the crack. I gasp as I see Hikari sitting on the piano bench, happy playing. Why is she in here, she said that she goes to the library?

She lied to me. Why? Why would she lie to me? I hear the violin pick up and my thoughts begin to wonder. Who is she in there with? I can't see them through the crack, and I don't want to catch her eye by opening it anymore.

But I'm sure there someone else in there, and she smiles happily at them. How could she do this? She lied straight to my face, for what reason?

The song soon ends and Hikari lowers her arms.

"That was fun," she says panting. "I never knew you could play." Some person speaks, but their voice is too low for me to understand or identify.

"Well, that does make sense." I hear someone walking around the room. By the heaviness of the footsteps, I can tell it's a male. Who is he? Do I know him? "You also know how to play the piano, or was that all you know?" Hikari questions with a smirk. I hear the footsteps come closer.

I rub my eyes in disbelief, not sure I'm seeing what I think I do. I think I just saw Shuu sitting down on the piano bench next to my sister. I open my eyes, but like before, the orange haired vampire sits besides Hikari, playing the piano like a professional.

So Hikari has been coming here for the past two weeks, to play with Shuu? Why didn't she tell me? I wouldn't have flipped out. Why would she resort to lying to my face? My trust for my sister soon burns like the tears in my eyes. How could she?

Without a second thought I threw open the door. She jumps and looks at me, her face turning whiter than the music sheets. Shuu calmly turns to me with an expressionless face.

"How could you?" I barely whisper. I clench my fist, anger swelling. "How could you lie to my face so easily?!" I scream out at her, a single tear running down my face.

"Y-Y-Yui, I-I, it-ts-"

"I trusted you, I believed you. I try to help you when I think you're down, trying to take the pain from you. Is this how you show gratitude, by stabbing a knife through not only my back, but my heart? You don't know what I've gone through for you, and you're over here playing a duet like you don't have a regret in life." I look over at the vampire, completely shocked by my anger.

"And now you're with Shuu? First you're getting cozy with Ayato, then you're fucking Laito, and, since neither of them are good enough, you start trying to make Shuu yours." I no longer have a filter for my anger. Hatred and pain surges through my body, causing me to no longer care about what I say.

"I thought I finally had someone person to trust, someone that that understands what I'm going though. Instead I was given a backstabbing, two-faced, bitch that tries to get in everyone's pants. Why is this," I gesture to the room, "such a big secret that you can't tell me. Have you two been doing stuff in here that you don't want me to know about? What else have you hidden from me? What else have you lied about? Do you even care about me?"

It all becomes too much and I can no longer stand there, unanswered question hanging in the air. I turn around and run out of the room. I hear Hikari calling out to me, but I don't turn around.

I know longer know her, I don't know who she is. I don't know how many lies haves infected the truth, and I'm unable to separate them. I know longer care, because I can no longer trust her.


	17. I'm Sorry

**Hikari's POV**

Déjà vu. It's a french word literally translated into 'already seen'. Its meaning: a strong feeling that a sensation or event has happened in the past, whether it did or not.

I'm having deja vu right now, and I know I've been here before. I know I've been on this bed, staring up at the ceiling, regretting.

Regretting trying to pick a fight with Ayato when I first met him. Regretting having sex with Laito. Regretting going to Ayato's room and having Yui see something that utterly confused her. Regretting letting Subaru's words get to me. But this regret is far worse than all of them. Regretting lying to Yui.

Regret is the worse feeling of them all. You want to do is take something back, to rewrite the last sentence in this story of life. But this story is written in an unerasable ink, so there is no going back. You must go forward, and make it that you no longer have any regrets.

That is much easier said than done, like most things are in my life. I haven't had a shred of opportunity to talk to Yui. She wasn't with us on the car ride home, neither was Reiji. She didn't come out for dinner, which was very shocking. Subaru hasn't even gone to talk to her yet.

I don't even think I could talk to her in this state. How could I? After everything I did to her, I can't just go up to her and say sorry. I don't think this is something a simple bow and punishment can fix either. I have broken her trust, and also maybe her heart.

And it all started with a simple lie, the butterfly that caused this hurricane. Why did I lie? I had no reason to, so why? I was just in a stupid music room. Nothing about that is big. Was it because Shuu was there?

Shuu. I hope I just didn't bring him in the middle of this storm. Does Yui think this is his fault? Why do I even care? Shuu isn't any of my business right now.

Even though I should be planning how I'm going to confront Yui, my thoughts start to wonder back to the music room. I rub my left hand, Shuu's touch still lingering after all this time. I can still sense him leaning against my back, arms over mine. A chill goes up my spine as I remember him soothing voice into my ear, lips only an inch away.

_I open the music room door, enthusiastic about today. I decide I was going to play a piece I've always wanted to master. I've always been a bit rusty on it, but I'm still going to try._

_I scan the room, looking for the blue eyed vampire. The room is vacant of life. I walk in and set my bag by the bench and set down. It feels different from yesterday, as if it was adjusted. Odd, no one else comes here, so who would have adjusted it to play? I shrug it off and fix it._

_I begin to press each key, making sure each one is playing its proper sound; a habit I have yet to shed. I get up and search the shelf for the piece. I saw it when I was sorting through them last week._

_Ah, here it is, "Spring Sonata". I walk over to the piano and place them on the stand. I should practice the parts I'm iffy at before Shuu gets here. I read the sheet over and over, yet I still feel as if I can't do it right._

_I take a deep breath and begin to play. I play the first few notes right, but then begin to mess up. I try again, but fail once more. I let out an exasperated sigh._

_I love this piece yet I wish I could erase it from my memory. It was Kaname's favorite, so I decided long ago that I was going to perfect it. My plan was to play it for his birthday, but I was never able to finish it._

Focus Hikari, you can do this _. I begin to play again and I get much further. I smile in triumph, but the joy is momentary, as I press the wrong once more._

" _I honestly thought you would get it that time," a voice says from the doorway. I turn to see Shuu leaning against the door frame. He walks up to me and leans against me._

_I automatically stiffen, what the hell is he doing? He rest his arms on top of mine, his long fingers covering my smaller ones. Unlike the triplet's, his are warm, maybe it because of his school blazer. He begins to guide my hands over the black and white keys, intruding me on my notes._

_"This is where you keep messing up." He moves my hands and he pushes his fingers against mines, the notes ringing out throughout the room._

" _Got it now?" he says, his whispers into my ear. I feel my face flush and I nod. He removes his hands and steps back. The moment his embrace leaves me, cool air flows over me, causing me to shiver. What in the world? I play the notes like he did, not looking up at him. I play them repeatedly, making sure I have each movement engraved in my brain._

" _From the top know," he says. I nod and start the piece over. It's easier now, and my fingers fly over the keys, as if I'm barely grazing them. I get sucked into the melody, losing all sense but hearing. I imagine rolling hill dotted with flowers. The birds flying overhead, arriving with spring itself. Butterflies dance in the wind like the notes off the piano._

_But soon it's no longer just the piano. I hear a new melody, breaking me out of my trance. I look up to see Shuu, violin to his chin, bow gliding over the stings._

_I'm so surprised that I press the wrong note and he gives me a deadly glare. I turn back to the piano and continue playing. He plays! I knew it, so why am I so surprised? I've asked him multiple times, yet he never answered. Maybe he was shy. Ha, Shuu shy, as if._

_I smile and play on. Our instruments' melodic sounds balances the other's, mixing into a beautiful tune. I look up at him with a foolish grin and he peers down at me._

_He raises his eyebrow and quickens his movements. It accept the change and make mine's just as swift. My heart begins to beat faster and a few drops of sweat form on my brow. I look up to my accompanist with a smirk._

_The corner of his mouth is turned up, a small smile. But he still smiled! He seems to be filled with surprises today. We play on until the piece is over._

_I lower my arms, breath coming out in hard pants. "That was fun," I state between breaths. He lowers his instrument and nods. "I never knew you could play."_

" _You really think I'm going to hang around the music room with no knowledge on how to play?" Shuu says placing the violin back on the wall._

" _Well that makes sense." I say. "You also know how to play the piano, or was that all you know?" As if taking it as another challenge, he comes over and sits besides me. He places his hands on the keys and starts to play._

_The piece is unfamiliar, but it's lovely. I look up at him in awe. He swiftly presses each key, his eyes focused on the keys. I'm mesmerized by him focus and skill._

_The door soon flies open and in the doorway is a red faced Yui. The music stops and all I see is my sister's cold, hate filled eyes piercing into me._

I roll around on my bed in frustration. How could I let it come to this? Subaru was right, I don't think I'm going to be able to leave this grave I have dug for myself. I may just die with my feeling and emotions as messed up as my relationship with my sister.

* * *

 

I've never been so glad to ride home. Today was the worst day of school ever. Not only did I not speak to Yui, but Laito began to pester me again.

All day was an endless cycle of silence, note taking, and harassment. I was so out of it I barely even cared about Laito.

I guess I bored him because he didn't even look my way during Home Ed. I guess the only reason he does bother people is to satisfaction of seeing their reactions.

When we pull up to the mansion, I linger in the limo. I rather sit here than go inside. The weekend just started, meaning from now till Monday morning, I'm going to be in this hell hole.

I wish I could go somewhere else. I don't know many places, and I wouldn't know how to get there if I did have a place in mind.

"Move out of my way, Melons," Ayato snaps behind me. I nod and slide out of the vehicle. I walk up the stairs to the door. I see Yui already at the top and Shuu slowly making his way up.

I notice that he seems to be almost wobbling up. He almost leaning fully on the rail and his holding his head.

I hope he's okay. Guilt twisted into a knot in my stomach. I didn't go to the music room today. After yesterday, I never want to step foot in that room, no matter how much joy it brought me.

I make my way to my room and drop my bag into the floor. I stretch out on my bed, letting the soft sheets comfort me. There's a house filled with people, yet I feel so alone. I had this same feeling while living with the Keis.

After about a month of living with them, I started to feel isolated. The guards positioned around the house didn't talk much. When I did try to speak with them they would stay silent and give me a look that said 'move along little girl before you get in trouble.'

My music teacher came every other day and left as soon as we were done. She was Italian and very strict, she wasn't the most fun to talk to.

One day I mustered up enough courage to mention my isolation during dinner. Natsume told me that I had to get used to. Instead of just accepting it, I pressed on. Natsume tried to silence me, but I was already over the limit.

That night I throw my first tantrum.

I started yelling at the twin, telling them they were horrible. I threw my glass at the wall, banged on the table, and cursed. Pure rage and pain surged through my blood. Before I knew it Natsume was out of his chair and beside me. I was so upset I tried to hit him. He caught my arm before it came in contact with him.

"Hikari, you need to stop," he said firmly. In that moment I notice what I was doing. I looked at the mess I made and then at Kaname. His eyes were wide with shock, never had I ever acted like this.

Tears started flowing from my eyes and I fell to my knees. I began apologizing over and over. Natsume lowered himself onto his knees next to me and wrapped his arms around me.

"I'm so sorry, Master," I sobbed.

"It's okay," he said smoothing my hair. "Let's go to bed, 'kay?" I nodded and stood up. He did too and wiped my tear away.

We went to the room and laid down together. I cuddled into him, smelling his familiar aroma. I began to wonder about the first time we slept together, my first day here. My first day.

"Master Natsume?" I whisper.

"Hmm?"

"Am I going to be punished." I asked hesitantly. In the moonlight that seeps through the window, I saw his sapphire blue eyes. They looked at me with a mixture of shock and pity.

"Yes, you're going to be punished for your ill behavior."

I nodded, anxiety began to turn my stomach. He pulled me closer and kiss my forehead. "Don't worry, you're going to be alright. It's just to make sure you don't act like they again." I nodded once more and fell asleep in his arms.

That morning I awaited my punishment. The suspension began to get to me around noon. Soon enough, Natsume told me to go to the room.

I went to the room and sat on the bed, palms covered in sweat. He came in a bit later. He moved the pillows off the bed and instructed me to sit against the headboard. I didn't know what he was planning, but I listen.

He then walked into the closet, that caused my stomach to drop. He came out with a black cloth, a pair of odd looking earmuffs, and rope.

He told me to lift my arm. I hesitated, which caused him to give me a stern glare. I lifted my right arm, which he tied rope around. He then tied the others end to the post. He did the same to my left. He then blindfolded me. The single piece of black cloth block out all light. This made me panic.

"Master?" I asked.

"Hikari," he said in response. "I'm going to leave you in her. This is to teach you what confinement really is."

That was the last thing I heard before he put the earmuffs on me. I called out his name, but I couldn't hear it myself. I felt the area of the bed near me raise, he left.

It was dark and silent, and I was terrified. I kept calling out his name begging him to come back. I tugged on the rope, but my effort was in vain. I began to sob I uncontrollably and apologizing. I apologized over and over. Asking for forgiveness, promising I won't be bad anymore, pleading to let the torment end.

To this day, I have no idea how long I sat like that. After an eternity or so, I felt the bed sink in. Soon followed a hand untying the tear soaked cloth from my face. The light filling the room blinded me for a second.

I looked at Natsume, who stared at me with a blank expression. He took off the earmuffs and untied my wrist, they were red and burned from me pulling on my restraints. I wanted to jump into his arms and cry, but I held back.

"Did you learn your lesson?" he questioned.

"Yes, Master," I replied with a hoarse voice.

"Which is?"

I looked down into my lap. "Not to complain about the condition I'm in. Im grateful to be here and I must live by the rules and conditions. May you please forgive me, Master?"

He placed his hand on my head. "Of course I will forgive you, I will always forgive you. Now let's tend to your hands."

If only my problems could be solved like they now, apology, punishment, apology, forgive. But I know I can't do that, I have to face this problem.

I get off my bed and walk to my wardrobe. I take out some clothes and put them on. I light blue and white striped T-shirt and denim jeans. I open my bedroom door and peer into the hallway.

Clear.

I walk down the hall to get to Yui's room. I scan the halls for the vampires, but none are present.

I make it to Yui room and stare at the door. I try to knock, but my hands remain at my sides. My feet stay rooted to the floor.

 _Come on Hikari, you have to face her. You can't stay like this forever, regretting what you did. You have to take action, now!_ I raise my hand and softly knock on the door.  _Come one Hikari, you almost died multiple times, talking to your sister shouldn't be a problem._ I knock one more, a bit louder. There's no response.

"Yui?' I softly ask. Silence. "Yui, please answer me." The door remains shut. I lower my forehead on the door.

"Yui, please, we need to talk. Please give me a chance. I know I screwed up, I screwed up really bad. I know what I did was unacceptable, and I regret it, I really did. Lying to you, keeping things from you, I was wrong to do it. I had no reason to deceive you. It was stupid and idiotic." Fresh tears threaten to escape my eyes. I clench my hands and bang onto the door.

"Yui please answer me, I shouldn't have done it, I wish I could take it back. I can't, and it really hurts me. Maybe not as much as it hurts you, which makes is even worse. You had to put up with my shit and I haven't done anything for you." I fall onto my knees, tears spilling out of my eyes like waterfalls.

"I wish I could take the pain for you, like when we were younger. It was so much easy back then. No lies, no vampires, no backstabbing. Just us two in our own world. I wish we could go back to those days. Natsume once told me that I could never rewrite the past, and no amount of wishing and regretting can. I can only choose how I should live my future." I turn around and place my back against the door. I look up at the hallway ceiling.

"We can't change the past Yui, so let's just look towards the future. I'm going to try and change this, to make things right. I'm starting by saying that I'm sorry. Yui, I have never been more sorry in my life. So please, please just answer me. Yui, I'm sorry! I'm so, so sorry. I hate myself for hurting you, I don't serve you forgiveness. I apologize for the pain that followed my arrival. I would totally understand is you completely hate me. But please listen to me when I say that I'm truly sorry."

I lower my head into my knees and cry. I don't know how long I stay like this, maybe a few minutes, maybe fifteen. But these tear filled moments helps me release something: that I'm still alive. That I still regret, that I still hurt, that I'm still here. I raise my head and wipe my tears.

I'm about to get up, but I feel the door behind me move. I look up to see Yui looking down at me. I don't know if it's because of my blurred vision, but she is smiling. Her face is stained with tears, yet she smiles.

"All I wanted to hear was for you to say those two words, that you're sorry," she say. I unsteadily get off the floor, and look her in the eyes. Her pink eyes are bloodshot, as if she was crying along side me.

We just stare at each other for what seems like forever. Neither one of us moving, as if we stopped breathing.

She then out stretches her arms. It takes me a bit to realize what she wants me to do. Without hesitation, I throw myself in her arms. I hold onto her as if my life depends on it. She envelopes her arms around me. I don't cry nor does a word leave my lips. I just stand there holding onto my sister.

She then places her hands on my shoulder, which I get as the hint to pull away. She looks me in the eye, but not like before. He eyes have a bit more joy in them, as if she's happy  _I_ accepted  _her._

"Okay," she says. "We need to calm down a bit before anything else happens." With that she takes a few deep breaths, and I copy the motion. Neither one of us speak. I look around the room. It's the same room from a few days ago, yet the atmosphere is completely different. I feel as if the walls are closing in on me, as if repelling me, telling me I'm not wanting here.

"You should watch what you say, some things you say can really hurt yourself," Yui says, uplifting the silence. She meets my eyes, but I look down at the floor, unable to look her in the eye. "'I don't deserve your forgiveness', 'I would totally understand is you completely hate me', you're causing yourself pain by saying things like that."

She takes my hand in hers, yet I refuse to peel my eyes from the floor. "Hikari, I know you're upset, but you need to stop this. I'm your sister, not some higher up. I don't want you not to look me in the eye because you ashamed, because that's what you  _master_ ," she spits out the name as if it was poison, "once told you to do so. We're both hurt, so let's overcome this together."

I slowly lift my head and look at my sister. She smiles her weary smile, and even with her red rimmed eyes and tear stained cheeks, she holds that smile.

"Yui," I say weakly. "Do you know smiles hide the worst pain? I know this because I use to smile that same smile everyday for almost two year. We both crack that smile to show the person hurting us that we still want them, that they still matter to us. We have to push back our tears to grin like that. But there is one thing different from my smile back then and yours now." The corner of my lips turns up in the smallest of smiles. "Your smile is pretty contagious." I tighten my grip on her hand.

"Yui, I never want to see that smile turn to a frown. So please tell me, how do I make this up to you? I will do anything. I can stop talking to the vampires. I can tell you everything I do. If it makes you happy, I will stop going to the music room."

To my surprise, she softly giggles. The giggle soon transform into a laugh, and I stare at her dumbfounded. What's so funny? This isn't a laughing situation.

"I'm sorry," she says, holding on stomach. She takes a few deep breath and stops. "It's just what you said. You can't stop talking to the vampires, it's impossible. And I don't need a report of what you do, that's a bit over the top. Honestly Hikari, I just want answers."

"If that's the case, ask away. I'm ready to answer any question you have."

"Why did you lie to me about the music room?" she says flatly. I can see the pain in her eyes as she says the words.

"Yui, truly and honestly, I'm not a hundred percent sure. It was like an escape for me. Being in that room with the piano and violin, it just took me to another world. One that I missing being a part of. Even though it was only for a few minutes a day, even though I had a limit and unwanted audience, I cherish those moments in that room. It was almost like a dream and I felt like if I shared it, it would vanish."

"I understand that it was precious to you, that you may not have want to share it. But is that really the reason?" After all the lies I told her, it shouldn't come as a shock that she may question my explanations. But it did.

"Yes, I swear there was nothing for me to hide." I tell her about everything that happened since day one. Assuring her nothing but music playing was going on in that room.

"Oh, well, that's good to know. You brought up the thing with Haru and Keita, what exactly happened?"

I bite my lip in hesitation. "The just wanted to know about Kaname and Natsume last week. Things got a bit violent, but Ayato helped me."

She nods in understanding. "With Ayato, um, is something happening between you two?" I raise my eyebrow in confusion. What could she possibly be talking about? "You know, last week in his bedroom..."

"Oh," I say. "I never got around to explaining that."

"That my fault, sorry. I was just confused and felt a bit...betrayed."

I explain the misunderstanding to her. "Why did you go to Ayato's room that day?"

"I heard from some classmates that Ayato was involved in the fight. I we to go talk about it with him. But then..." she trailed off, but I understood where she was going.

"Has Laito harassed you in anyway in the last week?"

Surprisingly, I can't recall Laito bothering for the past several days before today. I don't know whether to be concerned or relieved. "He hasn't bothered me for a while now, although it seems like he's getting back in the habit."

She sighs in what seems to be relief. Relief of what? I think back to what I told her about Laito, and that he 'raped' me. My stomach stirs as I think about it. Should I tell her? She didn't ask.  _So what, you should wait for the question, just confess._

"Yui, remember what I told about Laito the other day?"

The question seems to make her uneasy also. She replies with a simple nod.

"That wasn't the full truth. He did kind of force me into the situation, but I, well, um. I..you see-"

"It's alright, you don't need to explain," she say. I don't know if it was for my sake or hers. Once again we sit in silence, but this one is different. Sorrow and question no longer fog the atmosphere. This silence is filled with understanding and answers.

"I'm going to go wash my face," I say. Yui nods and I get up. I walk to the bathroom and go to the sink, wash my face, and look in the mirror. I look the same from half an hour ago -minus the red-rimmed eyes-, yet the girl in the mirror is different.

She no longer has the weight of guilt pulling her down, yet the regret still lingers a bit. I feel better, and I want this feeling to last. I turn off the water and leave the room.

Yui is still sitting where she was one I left a moment ago.

"I'm going to go now, if that's okay," I say. She nods and I walk to the door.

"Wait, Hikari," she calls out. I turn and see her right in front of my she envelopes her arms around me once more. "I forgive you." These words are powerful ones, three very powerful ones.

Most people say it's 'I love you', but I would have to disagree. I don't know if it's because I only loved once, but I cherish forgiveness. I wrap my arms around her.

"Thank you," I softly whisper.

"Am also sorry," she says sincerely, letting go of me. "What I said was out of line and totally uncalled for. I was just-"

"Hurt," I finish and she nods her head. "It's fine, I say shit all the time when I'm pissed."

We smile at each other and I leave the room. I walk out of the room a new person, ready to face the world, with no more lies.

I begin to walk back to my room. On the way I hear a voice. I walk farther down the hall and releases that its Reiji's.

"You can't keep doing this to yourself. It foolish and I won't allow it," he scolds someone. I get closer to the door but stay leaning against the wall.

"Do you forget who's older?" I hear Shuu ask in his I-don't-have-time-for-this-shit voice.

"You never act like you're the eldest. I don't care if she's like Sakura, you have to get of her. You being in this state is ridiculous and unnecessary."

I hear Shuu mumble something, but he's too low for me to understand. I wonder what they could be arguing about. Also, who's Sakura? The door flies open and a ticked off Reiji stares down at me.

"What are you doing?" he snaps.

"I'm sorry," I say.

The silver haired vampire narrows his eyes at my. "Leave," a simply yet stern command. I nod a quickly make my way down the hall. What was that? Why is he scolding Shuu?

I shake my head as if it would make the thought fly out my head.  _Why do you care? This day has been all over the place_


	18. Tease

"What do you do around here?" I ask my equally bored sister. We've been loitering around the mansion all day.

We thought we should hang out today since we never do. Because it's the weekend, we have the whole day. But the hours have ticked by and now the clock reads 3:45 am.

"I walk around the mansion a lot," my sister replies. "Sometimes Subaru feels like talking. I do some baking since Kanato loves sweets so much."

I let out an exasperated sigh. I wish I had a violin or a room crammed wall to wall with books. Just like with the Keis, I could read my day away. I could travel from worlds with just the turn of a page.

"Is there anything outside that you can do? I remember when I first came here I saw you outside." She looks up, trying to recall any events that happened in the gardens of this large properties.

"Well, there is the lake. It's quite large, but I've never actually been there. I always wanted to have a dip in it, but it's getting a bit cold."

"No, no, no," I say, shaking my head. "That's 'Ayato's lake'. I was there last week and he went ballistic." I remember how he threaten to slap me next time I went there.

"Oh," she say in what seems to be defeat. "We can still go by though. Ayato stays in his room all day on weekends, we can slip in for a half hour."

"That is tempting, but it's risky. Besides, I barely even know how to swim."

"Neither do I, but it can still be fun."

"I don't have swimwear."

"You have underwear. Come on, Hikari, it won't be that bad. So what if Ayato catches us, you've been through worse." Regret washed over her as soon as the words leave lips. "Oh, sorry."

"It's okay," I say looking around my room. I do know I've been through worse, but I don't want to start it again. But she does have a point.

"I shouldn't pry, sorry. If you don't wan-"

"You know what?" I interrupt her. "Let's go. Let Ayato do his worse, we can go." Her face lights up in happiness. "Go to your room and get a towel and whatever you're going to wear." She nods and hops off my bed.

I get up and go to my drawer, stripping down and exchange my nicer underwear for an older set. I sport a pink and white striped bra and matching pink panties. I throw on a simple yellow dress that goes to my knees. I go to the bathroom and grab my towel.

I make it to the greeting area without crossing paths with any of the vampires. I guess my theory of them staying in their rooms all day is true.

I wait by the door for Yui. She joins me a minute later.

She wears a red top with flowers, black skirt, and a purple towel in her hand. In the other hand is a lantern. I didn't occur to me that it's pretty dark outside near the lake. The walkway area is surrounded by lamps, so a light is always casted over you.

"Ready?" she asked enthusiastically, and I nod in response. We walk outside and the late night, or early morning, air blows over us.

We walk to the lake in a neutral silence. I lead her down the marble walkway and into the wooded area. I don't notice how bright the lantern is until we are out of the lamps' range.

Before we get to the clearing I stop Yui.

"Wait," I say cautiously. I get behind a tree and peer over to the lake. No Ayato. I let out a sigh of relief. We go over to the water.

I stick my foot in it, the same as last time- cool and dirty. I remove my dress and place it over a tree branch along with my towel.

Yui copies my actions. She wears a simple white bra and baby blue underwear with white polka-dots. She places the lamp by the bank.

We walk over the water and step in. I slowly walk in until that water comes up to my waist. The water is colder than I expected, but after moving around, it feels warmer.

Yui on the other hand cautiously walks in as if a monster may come out and attack her at any moment.

"What happened to all that energy?" I tease. I walk closer and splash some water on her. She shrieks in delight. She comes in and splashes me back. I take this as a challenge and begin to make the biggest wave to soak my sister. We splash water for a bit, making water fly everywhere. We stop to catch our breaths. I look up at the blue sky. It isn't sunrise, but the stars are gone. The moon is visible and shines dimly. We get out if the water and sit on its bank.

"There was an area like with near the Church, remember?" she ask quietly.

I nod my head. "I used to go to it when I need a break from my jogging. It was more of a waterhole than a lake, though."

"I had a dream about it the day you came here. We were much younger, about seven. We were playing in the water. Remember?" I nod my head. She looks up at the sky and lets out a small sigh. "Before having it, I had no idea who you were. But once I woke up, it all came flooding back to me." She looks down at her toes, covered with bits of leaves. "I'm sorry I forgot about you."

"It's fine, don't sweat it. We did our guilty confusions yesterday." I smile at her

"That's funny, Subaru told me the same thing."

"You and Subaru were talking about me?" I ask a bit hesitantly.

"Yeah, Thursday. He asked me how I felt about you. I told him that I love you and that I feel really bad about forgetting about you. Don't worry, all good things. Why?"

"That day he wanted to talk to me, he as-"

I'm cut off by the sound of rustling leaves. I stay in place in fear, Yui slides back into water with a splash.

My heart pounds so hard that I bet the person can hear it. It's probably Ayato, but what if it isn't? What would happen if it's one of the other brothers? Out from the path steps out a ticked off Ayato.

I look over to see Yui almost fully under the water, just her nose and up is invisible. I get back in and get in front of her.

"What are you doing over here, Melons?" he ask harshly. I flinch at his words.

"I just came for a swim, Ayato-sama," I answer. I hate calling him Ayato-sama, it boosts is already highly annoying ego.

"Didn't I tell you not to come here anymore? Are you that messed up in the head?" He comes closer and I walk backwards and feel Yui behind me. "Where do you think you're going? I see you also, Pancake."

Knowing her cover has been discovered, she stands up. I look at Ayato with a questioning look, what now?

He smirks at us. "You two look very good in your underwear. I bet my brothers would love to see you girls like this." With that, he walks to the tree that our clothes are hanging on. He touches my dress, causing me to pick up where he's going.

"Ayato-sama, don't," I say sternly.

"Who did you think you are, talking to me like that?" With that he takes not only mines, but Yui's belongings. "I'm going to be going now." He began to walk back to where he came from. "Oh yeah, Reiji is looking for you two. You better head back before he gets mad."

I look back to Yui who is wide-eyed with disbelief. I turn back to ask for our belongings, but he's gone. I groan in anger.

"Oh no. What are we going to do?" my sister says behind me. "We're in this situation because of me. Hikari, I'm sorry. If I didn't pry, we would be in this situation. We would still be in the room. Now we don't have our clothes an-"

"It's okay," I assure her. "But we do need to get back. If what Ayato said is true, Reiji is going to kill us if we stay here any longer. I don't think he's lying, that sounds pretty reasonable. I can see Reiji looking for us, we didn't tell him what we were going to do before we left."  _But when did he start caring about where we are?_

"So we're supposed to walk into the mansion like this?" she says looking down herself. I agree I do not want to walk around in my underwear, especially with all the pervert that live here. "Maybe Reiji is going to come and get us. If he does then he would see our predicament and make Ayato give us back out clothes."

I shake my head. "Ayato won't tell Reiji we're here, because he knows that's what would exactly happen."

"So, we go?"

I ponder over this. If we go now, we would definitely be seen by someone. I don't know about Yui, but half of the boys have already seen me completely naked. I'm not saying that I'm fine with flashing my body around, but it won't bother me as much. I look over to my sister who hugs herself, probably thinking over her own question.

"Yeah, we should just head back," I say raising off the bank.

"Now?"

"Why not? Everyone is in their rooms."

"It's just..um.."

"It's around 4:30, dinner isn't until another few hours. Reiji isn't going to be in the kitchen this early." I bend down and pick up the lantern. "Come on, if we procrastinate then Reiji is going to get more and more frustrated."

She slowly gets out of the water and by my side. "Let's get this over with, if any of the vampires see us..." she trails off, but I know where she's getting at.

We make our way into the woods like area. We walk with our eyes switching from ahead and the ground, eyeing for anything that could harm our shoeless feet.

"He could've at least left our shoes," my sister complains. I'm about to say, 'Well, this is a punishment', but I hold my tongue. I bet it would sound strange for me to tell her that. We make it to the marble walkway and I stop her.

"Let me check," I say. It seems like she is about to say something but she decided to hold it back. She simply nods in response I scout the area for the vampires, but none are present. I motion for Yui to join me. Her movements are quick and silent, good.

We do this for a bit, me walking ahead and Yui following. We get in the area where the lights reach us, so I blow out the lantern. Not wanting to hold it for forever, I place it down. I see a motion to my right and freeze. I begin to panic and realize it's just my wet hair, and let out a sigh of relief.

We are almost to the door when I hear Yui yelp and a thud. I turn to see my sister on the walkway, hand rubbing her bottom.

"Ouch," she says quietly. I guess she must have slipped. I walk over to help her, but I hold still when I hear the front door open. I fall to the ground, hoping whoever it is they don't see me.

"Stop complaining and just go check," I hear Reiji snap at someone.

"Whatever," Subaru says in annoyance. I see Yui stiffen she hears the youngest vampire's voice.

I look through the bushes and see the snow color hair vampire easing himself on one of the stairs with uninterpretable mumble.

"Is he just going to sit there?" I ask in frustration. My number one objection, not getting Yui and myself caught in our underwear, is being ruined because of this dude.

I curse him under my breath, now how are we going to get in? I look to Yui, who seems to have the same question on her mind. She hugs herself tightly, embarrassed about what may possibly happen.

"I wish he would just go back inside," she whispers. "I don't think his is going to rat us out. It's just... I can't face him in this state."

 _Think Hikari, think. He came out here to find us, so that's his main goal_. I take in my surrounding. I'm in the garden area, we can still hid in the shadows caused by the light, plenty of bushes to hide behind, a few pebbles on the ground. An idea pops into my head.

I pick up one of the small stones and throw it as far as I can. A small sound is caused by the rock hitting the ground. I peer through the bush once more, but Subaru doesn't move.

"Hikari what are you doing?" my sister ask with a hint of fright in her voice. "Do you want him to hear us." I grin creeps its way across my face and I nod.

I pick up a bigger pebble and throw it. This time the sound is louder and I see the vampire's head snap in up in attention. I throw one more and he is one his feet.

"Yui?" he calls out, and I see my sister stiffen. I motion for her to sit up and she does slowly. He walks down two steps but stays there. I groan in frustration. I take one more and through it as far as possible. With that he walks all the way down.

"Come on Yui, this isn't funny," he says in a slightly angered voice. I take Yui's hand and a start to walk very low to the ground. I walk to the other side of the bush as Subaru walks away from our direction.

Yui realizes what I'm doing and starts to crouch lower and walk faster. My heart pounds so hard I that I'm surprise Subaru doesn't hear it. I remember when I first came out here and stepped on the thorns and Subaru was nice enough to pick them out my foot. He was a bit harsh, but he was caring. I can see why my sister seems so be fond of him.

I look to the ground to search for anything I may step on. While scouting the ground I see a figure shift in the bushes, making me stop in my tracks. I look closely and notice it's the cat I saw last week. It hisses at me, baring its sharp teeth.

"What's that?" Yui ask, leaning to see around me. She see the cat and comes closer. "Hello, little cat." She offers it her hand, but it backs away a bit. Is this the same cat? I hear footsteps and I drop onto all fours hoping Subaru doesn't see.

Yui copies me, but instead of touching the marble walkway, her hand lands on the cat's white tail. It screams and scratches Yui with her claws. Yui cries out in pain causing that cat to scurry away.

I get onto my knees and turn to face my sister. She holds her arm up so the light from the surrounding lamps dimly shines in her arm. Four long, pink trails mark her lift arm, blood slowly coming out if the largest, deepest one.

"Yui!" I hear the vampire call out. I stretch my neck to look over Yui. No vampire. I look behind me and my eyes land upon a pair of black shoes. I look up to see Subaru staring at us in shock.

I want to tell him to stop staring, but the words won't leave my throat. Yui looks up from her injured arms and her gaze falls on him. Their eyes lock and Yui blushes furiously. "Stop staring!"

He turns around with his hand over his mouth. He's embarrassed? I see Yui shrink into a ball. I look for my sister to the vampire, and I feel like laughing instead of showing any kind of embarrassment. I feel bad for finding humor in their discomfort. After a bit I stand up, no need to hide when your cover is blown.

"What are two doing walking around outside without any clothes on?" Subaru questions.

"We were streaking and you rudely interrupted us," I say. I see his ears turn pink. Yui gives me a pleading face, asking me to stop. "I'm joking, God. One: we have clothes on, just not much. Two: we wanted to take a dip in the lake, but we came across some.. complications."

Yui rises slowly, the shock and embarrassed that once made her freeze slowly melts away. She crosses her arms over her chest. No one speaks for what seems to be a century.

"What time is it Subaru?" I ask.

"Ah, about 4:50," he replies, sliding his hands into his pockets "So, are you going to help us get inside without any of your brothers see us?"

He doesn't answer, he just begins to walk. I look over to my sister who is so red it looks like she may have busted open a vein.

We follow the vampire to the door as my sister stays shielded behind me, holding her scratched forearm. Our footsteps fill the night air.

I wonder what Subaru is thinking right now. Hopefully nothing lewd. He is no longer pink, which is a bit upsetting, that was hilarious.

Both of them completely embarrassed about the awkward situation. I don't know Subaru, but it seems strange to me. He doesn't seem to be the kind that would blush seeing a girl in her underwear.

Ayato and Laito would probably love it, Kanto would probably do the same or call the girl shameless, Reiji would tell her to put some clothes on, Shuu would shrug it off, all completely reasonable reactions for the vampire. Subaru blushing, no way.

Maybe he has feeling for Yui. The idea is strange but still completely logical. They seem to get along nicely, she talks with and out him a lot. I don't know if I could say that fully based on Yui's reaction, she would go crazy if anyone saw her in her underwear and covered in leaf bits.

We make it to the front door and Subaru stretches out his arm, signaling us to stop. He opens the door the oak doors and steps in. I want to lean over and peer inside, but I know if someone saw me I'll be in huge trouble.

"Dammit, Reiji," he yells. "They weren't even out there. Making me waste my fucking time on those two things."

I have an urge to slap him for calling me a thing. Yui looks pretty hurt by the comment.

After a minute of nothing happening but our hearts pounding and palms sweating, Subaru peeks through the crack of the door and nods.

We tiptoe in and I try my best to close the door silently. The door shut with a loud echoing sound making us all cringe.

We walk up the stairs and down the corridor without making as much as a peep. We make it to my bedroom, mine being closer than Yui's, and I let out the breath I was scared to breathe. I open my door and Yui is on my tail.

Before she can fully get in Subaru grabs her bleeding arm. She flinches, I can tell the pain just shot up her arm. He raises it up and examine it. He moves his face closer and licks up the carmine liquid from her forearm. She gazes at him without saying a word.

I close my door to give them their privacy, I highly doubt Yui would want me to see that. She wouldn't want me on looking such an 'embarrassing' moment. I hear them whisper outside my door, but I refuse to eavesdrop.

I lower myself onto the floor and lay there. I don't want to get in my bed and I don't want to take a shower before Yui. She enters the room, cheeks still tinted pink.

"What did he say?" I ask bluntly.

"He wanted to know what happened to our clothes," she replies looking at the floor.

"What did you tell him?"

"That Ayato took them." She shuffles around awkwardly. Why is she so nervous? My thought from earlier creep into my head.

"You like him," I say, not even asking.

"Ew, no. Ayato is such a perv, why would you say that?"

I roll my eyes at my sister, is she playing stupid or is she just naïve? "Not Ayato, I can't see anyone liking him. I'm talking about Subaru." My sister shakes her head, but I see her cheeks turn rosier. "You sure? It seems to me that you have developed quite a bond with him. Even early you told me that you guys talk a lot. You either chilled around him or completely red. Like now, your face is so red I bet it's the same shade of red as his eyes."

"Hikari, please stop," she pleads with a hint of a smile. "What about you? I saw you playing with Shuu, you looked so happy. I can tell you were enjoying every second, you told me you were. If anyone, I think you're the one with the crush."

"No," I say sternly. I told myself long ago that I won't ever fall in love again, not after Natsume.

Love is like a mirage. The desert, life, is hard to survive, sometimes you feel like you just want to give up on everything. It's hard to care on in such a horrible place. There would be an occasional spring or small oasis that will give you brief happiness, but you will still have to move on. Then, one day, you think you find it, paradise. Beautiful trees, ripe fruits, clearest water, everything you could ever dream of. You fight so hard to get to that illusion that you don't know that it's all fake. In the next moment it would be gone. And the feeling of losing something is horrible, but realizing you never had it to begin with is the worst.

And me in love with Shuu, not happening. For starters, I don't feel that way towards him. And if I did, it would never work out. I'm a human, his blood supplies. Forget my feelings, he would never have those kind of feelings for someone like me.

"No more talking about love," I say with a smile. "You shower first so can go off to your room. I will lend you some clothes." Yui nods and slips into the bathroom.

She bathe, gets dressed, and leaves. I also clean myself and put on some house clothes. I look around me room and spot my science notebook on my nightstand. I pick it up and lie on my bed, I should at least get some studying down. I notice by the time I'm done it's time for dinner.

I get to the dining room to see everyone seated except Shuu. I sit by Yui and look over at where the eldest vampire should be seated.

The mysterious butler, whom I've named James, comes out with the food, servers us, and leaves. We all begin to eat.

Throughout the meal I glance at the door, waiting for Shuu who never comes. Yui's words from earlier drifts back into my mind, but I push them out.

Why do I care about Shuu, I ask myself for the millionth time. The triplets and Subaru finish and go back to their rooms, leaving Yui, Reiji, and myself.

"Where were you two earlier?" he asked coldly, narrowing his eyes at us from across the table.

"We stepped outside for a bit," I reply, palms sweating.

"Why didn't you tell me this? I told you two that if you leave the building to go outside, I need to be notified."

I give him a confused look, when did he say that? I look over to Yui, who looks down ashamed.

"Sorry, Reij-" my sister starts.

"Look at me when you speak to me!"

Yui jolts due to the vampire's change in attuned. "S-sorry, Reiji. I forgot to mention this to Hikari."

He sighs in frustration. "I tell you to lay out the rules for her, yet you still don't know them yourself." He takes a deep breath and pushes his glasses up his nose. "Also, I don't care how upset you are or what kind of drama you're going through, when it's time for a meal you will come here and eat. We used to rarely do this, but once I was informed about a second bride," he says a bit hesitantly, which is odd, "living with us, I thought I should do this. Having meals with my brothers is quite a pain that I'm going through to make sure I know where you two are at the begin and end of the night. If I'm going to be undergoing this burden, you must be here. No excuses, understood?" He looks back at my sister, his eyes locked on hers. "Don't forget that I still haven't punished you for lying about my tablecloths. You two can leave." He gestures his hand in a shooing motion. We get up simultaneously and leave the room. Yui lets out a breath of relief.

"What did you do with a tablecloth?" I ask my sister.

"Remember that day when I told you that there was a meeting if you wanted to apologies?" I nod, mentally recalling the day.

"There was never a meeting planned. I told everyone that Reiji want to talk with us all. I told Reiji that Ayato was messing with his tablecloths again. That vampire is obsessed over tea sets and tablecloths and his brothers always use it to their advantage. So I thought I could do the same."

It isn't hard from me to picture the butler like vampire having dozens of tea sets and tableware.

"Thanks for setting that up," I say with a smile. Another action she did for my sake. "Oh, about his punishments..."

"You don't need to worry about them. He usually just declines a request. If he's real mad he will test one of his drugs on you." She shudders as if remember a past experiences she rather leave unsaid.

When we get to her room I notice something in front of her door. She seems to also see it and picks it up. They're her clothes from earlier.

"Ayato gave them back?" I question.

"No," she says shaking her head. "I asked him earlier, he said he was going to keep them." I'm disgusted by that statement and try not to think about what he may want them.

"How did they get here? The only other person who knows is..." she trails off and picks up her clothes. "Oh well, doesn't matter. See you later." She waves and closes the door.

I smile to myself. Subaru, what's going on in that head of yours?


	19. Guilt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Longest chapter yet!!!

 

**Shuu's POV**

I lie on my bed for what seems like an eternity. I toss and turn, but rest refuses to aid my weak body. I bet my yellow-green quilt is worn by now. I'm surprised I have enough energy to move about on my bed. Even getting up to use the bathroom was a difficult task without my brother's support. I stare up at the ceiling in boredom. I sigh and turn up the volume on my music player, causing the soothing melody of a violin solo to echo off my walls.

The music that I once listened to for hours on end now feels dull and lifeless.

Nothing like Hikari's. She plays what she feels, her emotions expressed in every note. The look of her face when she plays only emphasizes her passion. I wish I could have a playlist of only her performances. Especially the one she played on the second day. It irritates me that I have no clue what she played that day.

I groan in frustration, and then begin to cough. It hard and makes me whole body jerk. The coughs continue one after another, each one scratching my already sore throat.

I lean over and get the water from my nightstand. My fingers shake as I grip the glass. It takes all my strength to lift it to my mouth and sip the cool liquid without dropping the cup. I place it back down and fall back down on my bed.

This isn't very common. Rarely do I ever get sick, and if I do it passes within a day. Even my injuries, no matter how harmful, heal in no time. A blessing granted to whoever has the Vampire King's blood coursing through them. Only once has the blood of my father not been enough to substance my health.

I hear my door up. I look up to see Reiji walking down the stairs of my room.

"Every heard of knocking?" I ask in a raspy voice.

"Have you heard about maintaining one's health?" he counters, his eyes narrowed at me.

"What do you want?" I snap at him. Out of all of the punks I have to live with, he's the worst. I always wanted to strangle him. The way he acts as if he owns the place, it pisses me off.

"I came to tell you that the girls were still on the property. They decided to take a dip in the lake."

"Then how come we didn't see them from the window?"

"The went to the area that is covered by the trees."

I nod and roll back over. The lake, eh. I guess I missed my chance at seeing both of them in their underwear. I begin to imagine Hikari splashing in the water, underwear hugging tightly to her skin.  _Get a hold of yourself Shuu, what's gotten into you?_

I look back to see my brother still at the bottom of the stairs. "Leave if you have nothing else to say."

"Shuu, you must fix this. Immediately!"

"Stop acting so high and mighty, it pisses me off." I let out another raspy cough. "You worse than Beatrix." I see Reiji's fist clench and lips press together as I speak out mother's name. "What, did I strike a nerve? Are you so upset that she never loved you that now you're trying to please her by mimicking her? You should really let go of the past."

"You're the one who hasn't moved on! You never cared about any of the brides after Sakura. Now you're suddenly concerned when we don't know where these two are. What, does the thought of another runaway frighten you? Oh, my apologies," bitterness and sarcasm fills his words, "she never got away, now did she? You need to get over your pathetic feeling before history repeats itself."

If I had enough energy, I would have launch off the bed and planted a punch right in his mouth, but my limbs are too weak to even get out of bed.

"Leave," I command, the single word dripping with enough venom to kill a large beast.

He walks up the stairs and slams the door on his way out. It's very unlike him to lose his temper. Hell, like I care about him or the girls. But I do, about Hikari.

Ugh, when have I ever cared about anything? Nothing matters anymore. So what if she wanted to take a dip in that filthy pond, how does that affect me? It doesn't, so why was I so worried when no one could find her?

* * *

**Hikari's POV**

"Komori-san, Hikari Komori-san," a voice pulls me from my slumber. I lift my head from my bed and look around. I see dozens of eyes on me.  _Why are there so many people in my room?_  I focus and overcome my hazy vision. The fogginess of sleep leaves my eyes and I realize I'm not in my room, but in class. My classmates and teacher stare down at me.

I jolt up in full alert. I look to see Yui, who is wiping the side of her mouth . I narrow my eyes at her in confusion. I touch the corner of my mouth and feel liquid. I wipe the drool from my face with the back of my hand.

"Hikari-san," my Literature teachers repeats. "Class is not a place for sleeping. If you're so tired that must mean you were up all morning studying for the test you're about to take, correct?"

I look at her blankly for a second. Test? Oh yeah, the unit test. I mutely nod my head at my teacher.

Only half is that is truthful, I was up until noon. I was trying to piece this shitty puzzle of life together.

I was planning on how I'm going to change what people think about me at school. Last week, I really screwed up. My plan was to be nothing here, for people should know me by face only.

But because of the bastard, redhead, vampire brothers, people think I'm a freak. Falling asleep in class isn't going to help my reputation at all either. I look up to see people whispering and glancing at me. Instead of snapping at them like last week, I look down at my desk. I want to shrink into nothingness.

Thinking about school this morning eventually made my thoughts drift back to Shuu. One thing is for sure: I'm still going to be going to the music room. Yui said that she's fine with me going to the music room. She said that she thinks it's going to make Shuu happy.

I wonder what he did on Friday. Did he play or did he just lay down in the chair? Did he miss me?  _Ha, Hikari what are you think, Shuu missing you._

The teacher passes the test papers to Yui, and she begins to hand them to the students. When she gets to my desk, she give me concerned.

'Are you okay', her eyes seems to say. I smile and nod. She goes back to her seat and we begin our test.

I finish my test a few minutes before the bell signals the end of class. I'm actually very confident of my answer. I begin to put away my stuff when I see a certain red-haired vampire walk up to me. I let out an irritated groan.

"What do you want, Ayato-sama?" I question, anger seeping each word.

"Why must you be so cold?" he counters with a smirk. I press my lips together and pick up my bag, I don't feel like dealing with this shit. He grabs my wrist and I almost throw a fist at him. What is up with boys and grabbing my arm? "Oi! I'm talking to you."

I turn and give him a forced smile. "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't notice you, I try to block out bullshit," I say with a thick layer of sarcasm. The remark takes the vampire by surprise and his grip on me loosens. I take the moment to swipe my arm from him.

"You sly little bit-"

"Komori-san," my teacher calls my name, interrupting the pissed off vampire.

"Gotta go." I turn around to walk my awaiting teacher. I look over my shoulder to see Ayato leaving the room, his eyes piercing into me.

Once he's gone, I let out my breath. That was so fucking nerve-racking. I can't believe I just said that. I look down to my shaking hand, I was terrified. I am so surprised he didn't slap me right then and there. I mentally congratulate myself for my act of courage, or just plain stupidity.

"Komori-sa, we need to talk. I know that this is your first time attending a public school, and I know it could be hard to adjust. But I will not allow you to fall asleep in class. I excused your behavior last week, but I will no longer tolerate your shenanigans, not in my class. I want you to behave and enjoy the class, and you cannot do that when you're sleeping. Do you understand?"

I nod my head at her. She goes through a stack of paper on her desk. She pulls one out and hands it to me.

"I do have to say, you're very bright. Try to put as much effort into your behavior as you do in your work."

I look at the paper and realize it is my report I did with Yui. In the corner in red pen is 95. I'm a bit baffled, I didn't think I would get a passing grade on an assessment I was slacking on- Yui and me being too caught up in our drama to work properly.

"You may go, I don't want to hold you too long." I walk to the door and I hear her say, "One more thing, whatever you and Ayato Samamaki-kun are up to, keep it out of my class."

I want to assure her that nothing is happening between me and that bastard, but my attention is attracted elsewhere. By the door, I see Shiro waving at me. My feet carry me over to her. She clenches her bag in both hands when I'm next to her, is she nervous?

"Uh, hi, Komori-san," she says looking at me.

"Wassup, Shiro?" I say with a smile. I decide to call her by her last name. I don't want to start my informalness when she looks so nervous.

"Nothing much. I know this is out of the blue, but um. You don't have to if you don't want to, but I wanted to know if can join me for lunch?"

Is she playing a prank on me? Maybe it is me. My ears may still have some water in it from yesterday because there is no way I heard her right. She wants me to have lunch with her?

"You don't have to come. If you're busy, I totally underst-"

"No, no, I'm free," I say, but immediately regret it. I was going to talk with Shuu today. Well, it doesn't matter, it's not like he going to care if I don't come today. I only go there because I don't have anything else to do. I finally have something else to fill my time, so why do I feel so guilty when I think about not going?

"Really? Wow, okay, thanks. I will see you at lunch at the tree in the courtyard." She smiles and leaves with a friendly wave. I wave back at her, but my smile is a bit more forced.

I see Yui standing in the hall where my history class is. She must have notice me from the corner of her eyes, because she looks away from the wall and at me.

"Well, hello there,?Yui darling," I say, faking a posh voice. "What do I owe the pleasure of seeing you to.

She smiles and giggles a bit. "I was just wondering if something happen after class."

"I was lectured about my behavior," I say leaning against the wall. I pull out the report and hand it to my sister. "She does think that I do very well in class, though. Oh yeah, I was invited to have lunch with someone.

Yui smiles at me. "Well, that's new, with whom?"

"A girl named Megumi Shiro from literature. Dark brown hair that goes down to the middle of her back. Small nose, almond shape, honey eyes."

"Oh, her, yeah I know her. Well, at least you're doing something besides giving Shuu a live concert."

I look down at my shoes, not wanting to respond to the remark.

"Were you planning on going today?"

I sheepishly nod my head.

"It's not like I'm mad at you or anything. If it makes you happy, go for it. I'm not going to be the one to try to pull you away from your beloved vampire."

"Yui!" I stare at my sister in disbelief, did she really just go there? "Well, I'm only following my sister's lead. You're the one hanging with Subaru everyday. Please don't let your thought linger about me when you getting all lovey-dovey with him."

My sister gasp and her cheeks turn the slightest shade of pink.

"So was I right yesterday, you have feeling for him?"

"Hikari, now is not the time to talk about our love lives."

"One: I don't have a love life. Two: I'm taking that as a yes."

"Whatever. I'm going to let you into your class now. See you later." She waves goodbye and heads down the hall.

I open the door only to see a scene that would probably ruin the joyous day I'm having. Ayato is in the back talking to Haru and Keita. I clench my bag and maneuver around desk and students to get to the trio.

"Hey," I say as I approach the group. Haru, who was talking to Ayato a moment go, looks over at me with a wave. "What going on over here?" I ask with a forced smile.

"Oh, hey Hikari. Ayato over here just wan-" Haru begins but is cut off by said vampire.

"Nothing that concerns you, Melons."

Keita sneakers at the nickname, making me turn slightly pink. His friend notices my discomfort and slaps his glasses-wearing comrade. He says something to him that I can't pick up. Haru looks up at Ayato. "Dude, not cool."

Gratitude washes over me and I make a mental note to thank Haru later.

"It's fine. We have our own nicknames for each other, right Melons?" He smirks at me.

"That's only because I lost a bet," I lie to my two classmates. "It was Melons or something I rather not share."

"Wow, that must suck. What do you call him?"

I tense at the question. I look over at Ayato, his smirk grows bigger. This bastard planned this. "Well, uh-"

"Wait," Keita interrupts. "I heard this from someone in your literature class. You call him Ayato-sama, right?"

I look down at my shoes in embarrassment.

"It just a rumor, I don't believe it… Wait, are you serious? You have to be playing."

I'm lost for words. I raise my hand and start to pull at my hair. Moments like this make me wish I didn't cut it, my bad habit is more noticeable when I have to raise my hand.

"Don't look so down, Hikari," Haru says. "We've all lost a bet before. Just don't gamble if you know you're going to lose. I once made a bet with this jerk over here. Whoever was able to yell 'penis' the loudest in the courtyard won. Whoever lost had to ask out the most popular third-year girl. This defuse can't even ask the teacher a question, but he still thought he could speak above a whisper in the courtyard. He ended up losing before I even raised my voice from 'indoor' level. You should have seen his face when he realized his punishment. And when he had to ask out the senior." He cut himself off as he erupted in laughter.

I giggle slightly myself. What kind of stupid game, yelling out 'penis' sounds like something a middle schooler would think of. I look over at Keita who is embarrassingly smiling.

"Don't even bring that up," Keita says placing his hand over his mouth.

I look at Ayato who scowls at me. I just successfully interpreted whatever they were talking about with minimum embarrassed. I didn't even have to address him by his 'nickname'. I just ticked off Ayato twice today. I don't know if I'm being cocky or finally stand up for myself, but it feels good.

The bell ring and I move to the other side of the room, taking the last empty seat.

Fortunately, class passes in the blink of an eye, although I was barely paying attention. I'm not bothered by Ayato, no, I'm anticipating what may happen during lunch.

What could Shiro want to talk about? It must be important, him being so nervous kind of gives that away.

I begin to collect my belonging. I walk out of the room to see Haru and Keita talking to each other across the hall. I walk over to the inseparable duo.

"Hey, Haru, Keita, can I have a word with you two?" I call out.

They stop their conversation and look in my direction.

"Yeah, what's up?" the glasses wearing boy says.

"I know this is a bit rude to ask, but what were you talking about with Ayato?"

My question seems to take them by surprise. The look at each other, as if unsure if it's okay to share the information.

"I know, really none of my business. Just, was it anything about me? Or...or the Keis?" I bite my lip. I know I'm in dangerous territory. Even speaking about them makes me stomach turn.

My fear is that Ayato finally decide to take advantage of the knowledge these two hold about my past guardians. Even worse, if he is going to try and use this new found knowledge against me.

"Well, he asked us who they were."

I stiffen. Of course, the vampire is going to try and dig up dirt on my past.

"We just told him that they were our good friends and your, um, caretakers," Keita says.

I nod my head, still a bit upset that my beliefs were right.

"Does he not know about them?"

"No, not really."

The two make eye contact one more time.

"Hey, Hikari," Haru says. "What are the Sakamakis to you?"

They are the six brothers that hold me captive in a mansion where I'm the equivalent of livestock. I'm either ignored, yelled at, or harassed by them. They are the people that are going to keep me for the next two year, at minimum.

"Um, they are my living companions right now. After I left the Kei's house, I stayed with family for a bit. I decided to go to their household so I can be with Yui."

I feel a bit regretful for lying to the two strangers that have been completely honest with me, but there is no way I can tell them the truth.

"Oh, that's cool."

"Yeah. Well, I'm going to go now, I have plans today."

"Going back to the music room?"

"Nope." I smile and walk away with a wave. They reflect the gesture back and head down the hall in the opposite direction.

I walk outside to the courtyard. I'm just realizing that this is only my third time coming out here. The first time was with Keita and Haru, and that didn't end well. The thought crosses my mind and I'm made aware that I'm probably going to the same tree. I want to laugh at the irony. It's funny how this world works.

I make it to the tree and see Shiro tying up her long hair, no doubt to keep it out of her lunch. I notice that she has a bento box open on her lap.

"Hi, Shiro," I say as I approach her. She looks up, both hands working to make a ponytail in the back of her head. With her hair band in her mouth, she smiles at me. She removes the elastic band and wraps it around her chocolate brown strands.

"Komori-san, you made it," she says as if she thought I was going to bail out on her.

I sit down next to her and open my bag. I retrieve a plastic bag filled with baby carrots. I open the bag and pop a carrot in my mouth.

"How are you?" I ask, getting the conversation started.

"Oh, fine."

"Doing well in class?"

"Mm-hm. I got my Literature report back. I got an eighty-seven. It was pretty difficult, I'm so surprised I passed. What did you get?"

"Ninety-five."

Shiro stops the takoyaki from entering her mouth. She looks at me in disbelief. "Ninety-five? Wow, that's immersive, Komori-san."

"Is it okay if you call me Hikari?" I ask softly.

She at me, completely shocked. "Y-You sure?"

"Yeah, I prefer it. I will still refer to you as Shiro, if that makes you feel better."

"Whatever you like is fine," she says with a small shrug, her cheeks a bit pink. "Please don't take offense, but you are a bit strange. First you're quite, than you're snapping at people. I'm just surprised at the kind of person you are." She turns to me and puts her hands up in defense. "I don't mean that in a rude way, not at all. I'm just... shocked."

"Yeah, I'm shocked too. I may have fallen asleep in class, and I may not look like my must studious person, but I can get work done. Yui, my sister, was my partner. The part she worked on was better than mine. Who was your partner?"

"My friend Mei. You saw her before, she was the one with the glasses."

"Wait, you two aren't sisters?"

"No, we get that a lot, though. We're cousins."

"Interesting". This is a bit weird. I rarely have a simple conversation like this. Talking about things such as classes and grades. I never really had someone to talk to it about.

Yeah, there's Yui, but the conversation always ended up revolving around the vampires. With Shiro, it's just everyday life. She doesn't have to worry about punishments or getting bitten. Just sitting here with her feels like an escape from the crappy world I have been staying at.

"You don't have a lunch," Shiro states looking down at my nearly empty bag.

"Oh, yeah. I have Home Ed after lunch, no point in having a full meal."

"You don't always eat, though." She picks up one of her takoyaki and raise it towards me. "Here, have some."

I'm going to protest, but I know that it would be rude. Hesitantly, I open my mouth. She moves it towards my mouth and I bite it off. I take the ball from the sticks and chew on it slowly. It is quite good and when I finish I feel myself wanting more.

"It's good."

"Thanks, that's good to hear."

"You made them?"

"Mm-hm."

"Ayato loves takoyaki."

"Really?" She smiles and I see her eyes sparkle. I nod and the next couple of minutes are silent.

"Hikari?"

"Hm?"

"How often do you go to the music room?"

I let out a small laugh. I guess everyone nowadays knows about the music room. My private spot is now known to all. At least no one bothers me. "Every day during lunch."

"But you didn't go last Friday."

I look over at her in shock, how does she know that?

"I went over there Friday," she starts as if she read my mind. "I really wanted to hear you play. I waited outside in the hall for a while, but I never saw you come in. The room was silent, so I guessed you weren't coming. I got up to leave and I ended up tripping on my bag, I can be so clumsy at times." She smiles at herself. "Always, that third year, I don't know his name, heard me. The thing is that he called out your name. I guess he thought I was you. I didn't answer, and out of nowhere he was in front of me, I didn't even hear him come out of the room. He just looked at me for a bit. The thing is, he look pretty disappointed, upset even. He asked me if I knew where you were and I told him I didn't. He just walked back into the room. I stayed there and waited to see if you would come or if she would leave, but neither happened. I end up leaving when the bell rang."

I stare blankly at her. The story is so incredible, I start to question my trust in this girl. Did Shuu wait for me? Was he upset I did come? She must have hit her head when she fell because there is no way she saw what she think she did. Did I actually hurt Shuu by not coming? Why would me not going hurt him?

"Well, now I feel guilty," she confesses, looking down at her food. "You were going to go today, weren't you?

"I…I…" I what? I was. I wasn't. I don't know. I really don't know.  _Think Hikari!_

_Move!_

_Go to him!_

"I need to go." My arms grab my bag and bolt away from the tree. I think I just heard Shiro call out to me, but it doesn't matter, I need to get to that room.

What do I do when I get there? What am I going to say to him? What will he do? Does he care? Do I care? Why?

Before I know it, I'm in front of the music room door. With no plan in mind, I throw open the door.

"Shuu!" I yell out in desperation. My eyes dart around the room frantically. Like usual he's laying down on the sofa in the back of the room. I lean against the door frame and catch my breath. He's here, he didn't leave.

"Why are you making so much noise?" a raspy voice questions me followed by a cough. The voice is strange and foreign.

I look behind me and to see if someone had followed me, but the hall is empty. I look around the room but the only person in here, beside me, is Shuu.

"Are you blind? I'm right here." I look over to see Shuu sitting up on the couch. I walk over to him cautiously.

"Shuu, are you alright?"

"Answer my question first."

"Oh, I…I just really wanted to see you." Stupid, that made it sound totally different.

"Is that so?"

"Never mind that, what's wrong with you. You sound horrible, I bet if anyone heard you they'd wonder what's wrong with you. Just listen to that horrid cough."

"Listen," he repeats looking up at the ceiling. "I haven't heard you play in days."

The statement made my heart stop. Did he really miss me? Was he actually waiting for me Friday? Guilt began to stab at me. Why do I feel like this? I don't owe him a concert. If I come then I play, but coming here isn't mandatory. That was the deal. If I didn't come, then I couldn't play. it was a simple trade, so why do I feel so guilty for not showing up?

"I'm sorry for not coming Friday," I say shamefully. "I..I just couldn't come here after what happened with Yui. I felt as if me coming here so soon was going to make things even worse."

"Why didn't you tell her you were coming here?"

I look over at him in curiosity. When was he so interested in my life? "I really don't know, but can we not talk about it."

I get up and walk over to the shelf. I need to play something to get my mind off this. I scan the shelf, looking for a piece that can mirror my thought and feelings into a beautiful melody.

Even with the dozens upon dozens of majestic melodies, none of them really seems to capture my mood.

"What do you want to hear?" I question the vampire.

"Something...something lively," he answers in a very spiritless voice. The irony.

Lively. I try to recall a piece that I know that would feel very uplifting for the dead mood. The piece pops into my head and I scan the shelf for it. I find it on the top most shelf. I stretch as far as I can and I even stand on the tips of my toes, but the folder with the piece is still out of my reach. It's as if it's mocking me.

"Do you need help, shrimp?" the vampire offers. I look over to see him slowly getting up, but his knees look like they may give way with a single step.

"No, no, no, no," I repeat hastily. "I'm fine, it's okay. Just..do not get up." I say with my hands in front of me I look around the room for anything that will give me more height. There aren't any single desk and chairs like a normal classroom. There are about four long benches with long tables in front of them.

I spot a lone stool leaning against the wall. I get it and carry it over to the shelf. I get on top of it and I'm easily able to get the papers I desire. I hop off the seat and walk over to the piano.

I open the folder to the part that I know I play the best. Like always, I press each key to make sure it rings out the proper pitch. I look back to see Shuu fully laid out over to the couch. I gaze over the sheet a few times before starting the song.

My fingers race across the keys with ease. This is one of the songs I learned during rehab, so it's fairly fresh in my mind. Just like back then, the melody is a drastic contrast from my mood. Even the joyful tune can't really change me. But I'm not quite sure what I feel.

Shame because I lied to Haru and Keita.

Scared after standing up to Ayato.

Confusion about what Shiro said.

Guilt for leaving Shuu.

I try to shake out the thoughts and focus on the piece. My hands move up and down the board, crossing over each other at some parts. It is the longest piece I've played since coming here. The tone goes from light-hearted to a bit dark back to the cheerful repeatedly.

I finish and lower my arms. I take deep breaths to calm my ragged breathing; that piece took a lot out of me. I played for about ten straight minutes, something I haven't done in ages. The melody did help calm my storm of mixed emotions.

I turn around to gaze at Shuu, still and silent as always. I scoot off the bench and walk over to him. When I get closer I hear him breathing hard.

I touch his forehead and it's warm, but not hot like a fever. I cock my head to the side staring at the vampire curiously, what in the world is wrong with you?

I lower myself onto the floor and lean against the couch. The cushions are soft and comforting against my head and back. I close my eyes and smile, once again I'm breaking our deal of having to play if I'm in here. I nod off into slumber, my lips still turned up in the smallest of smiles.

* * *

The song Hikari played is Beethoven's Piano Sonata No. 25 in G major

watch?v=IYmA7_AgB8E&list=PLiS4QTnMzjgK-9aaMzLZEJjKJygOViZ1C&index=35

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song Hikari played is Beethoven's Piano Sonata No. 25 in G major
> 
> watch?v=IYmA7_AgB8E&list=PLiS4QTnMzjgK-9aaMzLZEJjKJygOViZ1C&index=35


	20. Hurts Me

My heart pounds loudly in my chest. My hands clench my skirt, sweaty and trembling. The hairs on my neck stick up straight as if charged by electric shocks. The vampire's relentless stare burning into me, making me just want to die. I dare not meet his deadly gaze. Not like I can, my head is bowed so far down that I think I may injure my neck.

The room is silent, but there isn't anything left to say. Never had I been scolded so hard for misbehaving, not even Natsume could make me feel this regretful. I thought that Reiji was the level-headed, calm brother, but my assumption was wrong. Even though he was mostly calm at lecturing me, he did raise his voice constantly to make his point. I've been in this room for the past ten minutes as he reproached me about my ill behavior at school.

I ended up falling asleep in the music room and stayed there for the rest of the day. I missed my last two classes of the day due to this nap. My Home Ed teacher was extremely anger because I'm constantly late for her class. Honestly, it's not like I was planning for all this to happen, I just knocked out.

"Your careless actions aren't just affecting you," the glasses wearing vampire continues, "they are becoming just as bothersome for me also. Since Shuu is inadequate to be a proper guardian, I have to take over said position. That means when the staff members have a problem with you, I must endure their petty cries of annoyance."

"I'm sorry," I repeat for the millionth time since entering this room. "I will fix my behavior immediately so you will no longer have to bear such bothersome moments."

The vampire finally lowers himself into the chair across from me with a sigh of both frustration and annoyance. I want to see what he is doing, but my back and neck remains craned over.

"The teachers wanted to give you after school detention for the rest of the week. That is something I can not allow, no one is staying at the school longer than is necessary and I don't want you there by yourself. So, for the remainder of week you will serve your time during lunch."

I yearn to protest, but I bite my lip to prevent a rebuttal. I'm not allowed to object to punishments, you must take what you given, even if you don't want it. If I have to serve detention during lunch, I'm not going to be able to go the the music room. After today I realized I hated leaving that magical room, now I'm banned from it for four whole days. I feel something inside die at the thought.

"Yes, Reiji," I reply in a small voice followed by a moment of silence.

"Raise your head Hikari."

I slowly raise my head to look at him. I feel a pain in my lower neck, but I try to ignore it. The vampire's elbows are rest on his knees, his chin placed on his laced fingers. His red, unforgiven eyes are narrowed behind his glasses. "If you want, you can leave now."

Usually, I would have run out of the room like my life depended on it, but my feet stay planted to the floor as if they were weaved into the carpet during the lecture.

Reiji notices my hesitation and arches an eyebrow at me. "Do need something, a clarification of anything we discussed?"

I'm about to reach up and tug at my hair, but I stop. I need to be serious when I speak to Reiji, knowing he doesn't play.

"I have a question that isn't relevant to the prior subject."

"That is?"

"Do...do vampires get sick?" The question has been entering and leaving my mind ever since I saw Shuu wobbling up the stair Saturday.

"For most, yes, but none of us here do. Our bodies are almost completely immune to petty virtues that you humans catch easily."

The statement takes me by surprise, so Shuu isn't sick. I feel relieved that illness hasn't fallen upon the vampire, but the feeling of worry washes over me once more. If he isn't sick then what's wrong with him?

"Oh, okay." I push up on the armrest to get myself out of the chair. Without an ounce of hesitation, I walk to the door. I jump as I hear Reiji say, "What made you curious about something such as our health?"

I'm silent for a moment as I try to decide what to do: lie to him or give him the honest answer. Would he question me further if I tell him that I was thinking about Shuu's recent behavior?

"Ayato was red all day today. I didn't know if he was coming down with a fever or he was mad at me."

He narrows his eyes at me, as if questioning my reply. "Very well."

I open the door and step out of the room. I close the door and let out a sigh. If I have to go through such a nerve-racking experience every time I miss class, then I'm going to make sure I'm early as a precaution.

I walk down the corridor to get to my room, knowing the usually mound of homework I have has double because of today's nap. I'm already having problem with science, so missing a lesson is totally going to set me back even further. I should ask Yui for some help.

I turn around so I can go to her room. I knock on the door, calling out her name. My sister tells me to enter and I open the door. She is on her bed, books and notebooks opened and scattered across her bed. Her hair is tied up and a pencil is tucked behind her ear, a book lies open on her lap.

"Hikari, what's up?" she ask and flashes one of her soft smiles.

"Mmm, nothing much, which is the problem. If you're not too busy, do you think you can help me with science?"

"Yeah, of course. Get your stuff." I nod and head off to my room.

I get back and we work on today's lesson and the on prior to it. Yui makes everything sound way more simple than the teacher, her methods are easy to follow and remember. I may have been the tougher one, but Yui always triumphs over me when it comes to academics. Even with my vast knowledge and usually high grades, Yui still has the upper hand. I honestly think it's because of the teaching style. I've always been used to one on one learning. That how it was with Natsume, of course, I was his only student. Even farther back at the Church, it was always just Yui and me with whichever adult had free time to help us.

Once I understand the lessons, I begin to work on the problems. We work in almost complete silence, the only noises of pencils scratching paper and the turning of paper.

"Why were you so behind?" Yui questions me after a while.

"I didn't go to class today."

She looks up at me in surprise. "Why?"

"I end up falling asleep in the music room," I say nervously.

"Wow, are you serious? I saw you snoozing in class, but you actually skipped to sleep? Did you even sleep yesterday?"

"I was up pretty late, there were things I couldn't get off my mind."

"I see," is all she says. She doesn't push on, leaving her unspoken question to herself.

"Can I ask a completely random question?"

"Sure."

"When was the last time each of the vampires bite you?"

She looks at me with a confused expression. She sits up and looks up, tapping her pencils to her chin. "Hmm. Reiji bit me Friday, and Laito two days before him, Ayato bit last Monday, Kanoto last Wednesday."

"What about Subaru and Shuu?"

"Subaru bit me right after school today." She pulls down her sleeve to show me four small puncture wounds on her shoulder. She pulls it back up and begins to tap the pencil against herself again. "I can't really remember the last time Shuu bit me.

"You can't?" The question leaves my lips in a small whisper.

"Oh, now I remember, it was two days after you got here. Woah, that was pretty long ago, that's two and a half weeks ago. Which is very strange. When I first got here, he had no problem sinking his fangs into me."

My eyes widen at the statement. Two and a half weeks? That..that's ridiculous. He hasn't even bitten me since I've been here. The pieces soon start to fall in place in my head.

Shuu hasn't had any blood in over two weeks. Blood is vital for a vampire, without it they can't live. A few days ago he started to become very sickly. Reiji said they don't catch viruses, so it has to be something mainly vampires experiences: a lack of blood.

I begin to collect my belongs from off of Yui's bed.

"Hikari, hey, Hikari?" my sister questions, confused about my sudden behavior. "What's wrong?"

"I'm sorry, but I need to go," I say throwing my stuff back into my bag. I hop off of the bed and head to my room.

I throw open the door and toss my bag onto the bed. I stride back and forth across my rug, trying to get my thoughts together. I begin to twirl and tug my hair so hard a few strands come out. I discard my jacket and tie as well. I open my nightstand drawer. I find the mansion map neatly folded and pick it up along with a hair tie, which I place in the pocket of my white collared shirt.

I follow the map to the my desired destination. Before my first hits the door I stop it. What exactly am I going to do? I have no plan, just a goal. Ugh, I hate when I do this, this is the second time today I did something like this with no clear plan. I take a deep breath and hold it, only after a few seconds do I let it out. I'm just going to play it by ear and see what happens. I knock on the door, butterflies, no, more like birds flying in my stomach.

There is no response from the other side of the door. "Shuu? Shuu, it me, Hikari. May I come in?" I feel sweat begin to form on the palms of my hands as I wait for an answer I'm not sure I may receive.

"Come in," a low, hoarse voice says from behind the door. It takes me a moment to calm myself enough to open the door. I open it and step into the room. I gaze around the eldest vampire's room.

Unlike the other rooms I've been in, there are stairs leading down from the door. There is a yellow-green sofa in the middle of the floor, in front of it an oak coffee table. There is a desk against the wall with a chair that matches with the couch. There are two windows on the wall to my left, curtain the same shade as the seating set. Against the wall is a large king size bed. Going with the theme of the room, there is a yellow-green quilt over the white bedding.

On top of it lays the orange haired vampire. His sapphire blue eyes lock onto my pink ones. He's eye may hold the same power a the Greek monster Medusa, a simple gaze leaving me unable to move. I try to say something, but nothing can leave my mouth. I feel as if I can't do anything, knocking seem to drain all of my energy and courage.

"Do you need something?" he asks sitting up. I notice that he clenches his teeth during the movement, as if just the small action is a huge struggle.

"Y-yes," I stutter. He raises an eyebrow at me. "Oh, yeah." I proceed down the stairs, each step bringing me closer to the vampire. I get to the bottom and hesitate a bit before walking over to the bed. I look at the vampire, unable to speak anymore. How exactly am I supposed to do this?

"Are you okay?" Shuu asks. The question takes me by surprise, that's my line.

"Oh, yeah. I'm fine, just fine," I answer quietly.

"Were you earlier?"

"Mmm-hmm." My hand goes to my hair and I begin to wrap the brown stands around my finger.

"You're lying." The statement makes me stiffen. My hand begins to slightly shake and I lower it.

"W-why would you say that?"

"You only play what you feel, and today wasn't like the other days. You were hesitant, you weren't feeling the piece. You didn't feel joyful or lively. If I asked you play a much calm, maybe dreary piece, you would have aced it."

My eyes grow at Shuu. "That's...true." How does he know? I stare at the vampire. He's so strange and mysterious, yet he knows so much. He noticed something as simple as my way of playing music and how it comes from my feeling.

He closes his eyes and leans against the headboard of the bed. "What did you come in here for?"

I break out of my trail of thought and blink a few times. Oh, yeah. I take a deep breath and sit down on the bed near him. I take out the hair tie and fashion my hair into a ponytail, any hair left out I tuck behind my ear. I unbutton the top two buttons of my white shirt and pull it down over my right shoulder. Knowing there's no going back I softly call out the vampire's name.

He opens his eyes and looks at my exposed skin. He's mouth drops open and I can see hunger fill his blue orbs.

"Shuu, I know you haven't had any blood in over two weeks. I don't know why you're doing this to yourself, but I don't think it's good. I know this isn't some kind of sickness, I already talked to Reiji."

His eyes meet mine once more and he looks away from my flesh, biting his lip.

"Shuu, please don't be like this. You're a vampire, you need blood, it natural for you. That's why I'm here, right? Like Reiji said, I'm your supplies of blood. That's the reason girls are sent here, to give you what you need. That what livestock is." It's a huge blow to my pride admitting that I'm the equivalent to livestock, but I don't know what else to do.

"Don't say that, you're not livestock," he says, turning his head away from me.

"Shuu, please. You think this is hard for you, I'm the one offering myself up." The statement doesn't do any good and I see him clench his hands.

"Shuu, I'm begging you. I...I just can't stand seeing you like this, so weak and ill. It makes me feel weird when I see you walking so wobbly and hearing you so hoarse. It may not hurt me physically, but it pains me to see you in this state."

He slowly moves his head in my direction. His eyes meet mine, and they're different than usual. Usually, his eyes are half closed and tires, but now they are wide, filled with hunger and bloodlust. I feel my palms sweat as I scoot closer to him. I slightly crane my neck to better show of my lightly tanned skin.

"Goddammit Shuu, can you please just bite me already!" I spit. Not a moment passes after those word before I feel Shuu's hand pull me closer. I feel four fangs pierce into my skin and I cry out. I was too preoccupied with trying to convince the vampire to bite me that I didn't even mentally prepare myself for the bite itself.

He suck vigorously at my skin causing me to whimper. It's not like anything I've felt before. Yeah, I have been bitten before, but not like this. The triplets bit me and drank my blood as if it was a luxurious drink. Shuu desperately drinks my blood as if it was the first drop of water he had in weeks, which it is the equivalent to what he's been going through.

He release me and I hear him breathing heavily. I don't have a moment to recover before sinks his teeth right under my collar bone. The pain only intensifies and I cry out once more. I feel tears begin to sting my eyes. He gulps down my blood, not letting a drop go to waste.

Blood starts to spill out of the previous piercing. He releases his bite on me to lick up the blood running down my neck just before it touches my shirt. He begins to lap at the wounds and occasionally sucking on them.

I start to feel light headed, but I have to overcome it. Shuu needs this. I bite my own lip as I feel him make new piercing on my shoulder. A single tear leaves my eye and I feel a hiccupping sob begin to form in my throat. I push it down as he continues to drain me of my blood. He begins to bite down even harder, as if he is going to eat my flesh. I feel the small piercings become large gashes and more tears run from my eyes. The corner of my vision begin to turn black. The punctures in skin erupt with pain. My once trembling breath now comes out in short, hard, desperate gasps for air.

My head only feels lighter as the vampire sucks relentlessly at my shoulder. The pain only intensifies with every passing moment. Think of something else, focus on anything else.

Focus on Shuu.

I don't want to look at his face, my blood seems to be painted all over it. Instead I look at his hair. It has always looks so soft. I find it quite odd how the vampire's hair fades into an almost white color on the tips. I place a shaking hand on his head. I lace my fingers through the beautiful orange strands it is soft.

He gasp at my touch and opens his mouth, removing his fangs from my skin. He stares at me, his eyes no longer filled with the bloodlust from earlier. Instead the are filled with shock. Blood- my blood- is on his cheeks and chin. His mouth is ajar in shock, his fangs tinted red with my blood.

I smile at him. "Better now?" I question. The lightness in my head makes me dizzy and I feel myself collapse onto the bed. My vision blurs and eventual goes completely black.

* * *

 

I don't open my eyes immediately, they are too heavy to lift. I listen. I hear murmuring from across the room. I have no idea who they are, they speak so lowly I can't figure out what they are saying. I try to say something, but my mouth is drier than a desert.

I begin to shift my position but a wave of pain shoots up my right side. My eyes shoot open as I cry out in pain and my hand flies to my shoulder. Instead of feeling my wound, my hand falls onto a bandage. I look over to my should completely wrapped in white cloth.

"She's awake," I hear a voice state. A figure comes into my vision and it takes my eyes a few seconds to focus on my sister. Concern is written across her face. Next to her is Reiji who frowns down at me. She places a hand on my head as if I was a child. "Do you need anything?"

"Water," I say softly. She nods and leaves the room. I look over at Reiji. "Is it bad?" I ask, eyes dropping to my right shoulder.

"Bad is an understatement," he says in a stone cold voice. "He could have torn off your flesh, and he almost did."

"Hmm." I remember how hard he was biting down on my shoulder. I guess I'm lucky he wasn't as crazy with my neck. "What happened after?"

"I beg your pardon?"

"What happen after he bit me?"

"Again, another horrendous understatement. I was already making my way to his room when I smelled blood. I simply opened the door to see you passed out on the bed. It seemed like he consumed a bit too much."

"I see." I look down at my lap, not wanting to eye the vampire anymore.

"What you did was pretty reckless. You went into an area with a starving vampire, fully exposed might I add. Do you know how dangerous that is? It's the equivalent to walking into a pack of wolves. You should be grateful he has some sense of self-control."

"I just did what I had to do. That's why I'm here, I'm liv-" Shuu's words echo in my head,  _you're not livestock_. "I'm you guys' blood supplies, right? The triplets seem to understand that, I don't know if the rest of you do. You are the one that told me."

"I'm completely aware of your position in this household. I already planned to get you to give Shuu some of your blood."

"Ha, I guess I beat you to the punch."

"A idiotic decision on your part."

"Are you trying to make me question my choice?" I glare at the vampire harshly, although I feel my voice begin to tremble. "Because I don't, and no matter what you say, I never will. I have some kind of sense of righteousness, and what I did lays in that category."

"So you did it purely because you know it's the right thing? So pure se it was Laito who wasn't consuming the proper amount of blood, would you go to his aid?"

"No... um… Well…I .." the question takes me by surprise and have no idea on how I'm supposed to answer. For all I care that pervert can rot in hell.

"Ayato then?"

"Um…"

"How about Kanoto?"

"I don't know.."

"Me?"

"Can you stop interrogating me and give me second to think!"

"If you need to think about it, that means your motive isn't because it's the right thing to do."

I stared wide-eyed at the vampire. It's true, I wouldn't do it out of the kindness of my heart. They would have to force me to gain access to my blood.

The vampire stands up and walks to the door.

"When I'm gone, think this over: why did you go to such lengths for Shuu?" He leaves the room before I could say a word. Even if he stayed longer, I wouldn't be able to come up with some excuse.

Why?

It seems to be the only question the runs on repeat in my mind when I think about Shuu. Why does he always linger in my mind? Why does it seem like he's the only one I think of? Why do I always feel so discombobulated when I think him, yet when I'm with him I never want to leave?

My emotions are always so strong when I think of him.

The feeling I had today when I traded the music room for lunch with Shiro. I wish I was there the whole day, playing for him. That feeling of longing to be with him pained me.

Last week when Haru and Keita were overwhelming me. I felt as if I was going to break right then and there, but the vampire saved me. Shuu came to my aid within moments, as if he was waiting to intervene if things turned bad. I can never forget the way he protected me, ensuring my safety.

Shuu is the one who told me to raise my head when I was apologizing for screaming at them. His eyes were so soft when he looked at me. He lowered himself so he was on eye level, like we are equals.

The way he guided my finger over the keyboard, helping me on the piece I was such a mess on. He's long fingers completely cover mine, his chest pressed against me back. I flush as I remember the warmth he brought me.

And today, to feeling of guilt when I figured out his condition. Knowing that this whole time I was able to aid him and he never came to me. I could have helped, but he pushed me away! And when I offered he immediately declined. I wanted to help him and he refused. I was putting my safety on the line for him and he didn't even care. It took so much willpower just to knock on the door, and then he was going to try and make my efforts in vain. I just could see him like that, so weak and ill.

That hurt me!

"Hikari?" I look up to see Yui holding a glass of water, eyes locked on me. I feel a wetness on my cheek and I raise my left and to my face. I'm crying. Why am I crying?

"Hikari are you okay? Does your shoulder still hurt?"

"No, no it's fine." I take the glass and take a sip. I place the cup down on the nightstand and look down. "Yui thank you, but I need to be alone." Hesitantly, she nods and leaves.

I lay back down face in pillow. Shuu plagues my mind his warmth and kindness. The way he makes me feel safe and cared for. He never crams the fact that he's my superior down my throat.

I want it. His warmth, protection, kindness. The longing for him in my heart hurts for more than any wound.

Why? Why does he make me feel this way? He makes me feel...loved.

I move my hand to my chest. My heart pounds so hard I think it make break one of my ribs.

Oh, fuck. I can't be. This can't be, I can't be. It just can't?

No more, I said no more. Stop it Hikari, you need to stop thinking of him. Stop feeling this way.

I said I would never feel this way to anyone ever again. I can't be hurt again, I'm not going to go through this. I'm not going to feel this way towards Shuu.

But I am.

I'm in love.


	21. Promised Myself

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can someone please explain why this is my longest chapter yet? 9,128 words! Damn, before this my longest was only 5,446 and almost double my last chapter. I hope you guys enjoy this chapter.

 

Never had I thought that living with six vampires, my sister, staying in a mansion, and going to school would be boring. Yet, here I am, dying of boredom. My life has been so chaotic since coming here, everyday something happening that seemed to make my world change.

 

Contrary of what life has been so for, the past two days have been uneventful. I go to school like always. After Monday, I make sure I pay extra attention each of my classes. After History, I go to a certain room for detention, this is where my day turns utterly lifeless and boring.

 

There are about four other students there. For the next fifty minutes, I sit in a chair and work. I would get a few assignments done before my mind would wander. I would think of Shuu and the music room. I imagine the song I would feel like playing. Today I actually started tabbing on my desk as if it would transform into a keyboard. I got a few strange looks, but no one spoke.

 

Once I get home I do the work I didn’t finish during detention. After that, I read a book. None of the vampires has bitten me since Monday. Reiji said he wouldn’t allow any of them to even take a drop of my blood until I have fully recovered. He refuses to stitch my wound, saying that it's my fault I have it in the first place.

 

That was my whole day yesterday and today. Bland and boring. It’s probably going to be like this for the rest of the week.

 

I throw my book to the other side of my room and groan in frustration. I wish I could have gone to the music room. The thoughts of the room make me think of Shuu. My heart aches every time he enters my mind.

 

I haven't been able to speak to him in privacy, or at all in that matter, after I realized my feeling for the vampire. I don't even know if I'm going to tell him. It's pretty weird, falling for someone you met only two weeks ago. Well, I instantly fell for Natsume, but that's an entirely different story.

 

No, no, no. I can't think about this. This feeling is going to pass, it has to. If I'm going to feel like this any longer, I'm going to go crazy. I have to get rid of this emotion I never wanted to have again.

 

I roll over onto my stomach, big mistake. I cry out in pain when I stretch my right shoulder muscle to its limit. Not only that, but I implied a bit too much pressure to it during the roll. Under the bandage, I feel the wound open up again. I scream into my pillow, mostly out of frustration. This is so annoying. The boredom, the unwanted emotion toward the vampire, and pain. I want to crumble these feelings up, drown them in gasoline, and set the whole thing on fire.

 

My door open but I don't look up. I feel my bed sink in under someone's weight and a hand rubs my back. Only one person in the whole household would do such a kind and calming gesture.

 

"Yui, what am I going to do with my life?" I ask, face still buried in the pillow.

 

"I ask myself that question a lot," my sister replies. "After a while I just accepted what is happening in my life and live life in these conditions."

 

That's the thing, I already done this and I swore I would never let another person have control of my life. After staying in the same place for almost four years, I never wanted to have to follow anyone else's rules. I want to be in control of my own life but it seems like I never going to get the opportunity.

 

"How's your shoulder?"

 

"I opened it."

 

"Seriously? We need to change the bandage."

 

I grumble in my pillow.

 

"Come on, Hikari," my sister demands. I roll back over, more careful this time, and get off the bed. I make my way to the bathroom slowly, dragging my feet across the floor. I really don't want to see the wound, so of course the thought of Yui seeing it makes me even more upset.

 

I walk into the bathroom and see Yui by the counter retrieving the medical supplies from under the sink. I begin to remove my clothing, wincing in pain when I stretch the muscle.

 

"Let me help you," my sister says.

 

"No, no I got it," I protest. I manage to get the jacket, tie, and shirt off without her help. I notice I have to take off my bra to be able to remove the bandage.

 

“Yui, may you pass me the scissors?”

 

She passes me the cutting tool and goes back to fishing out the rest of the supplies. I turn around and unclip my bra. Even though it hurts, I lift my right arm so I can cut the cloth from under my armpit. I do so and hook my bra back together. "Do you even know how to do this?" I ask turning around and handing her back the scissors.

 

"I have some idea,” she replies with a shrug, taking the tool and placing it on the counter. She begins to pull out the cut cloth pieces. I see some of the pieces completely soaked in my blood. Yui drops them onto the floor and stares at the wound once it’s full uncovered. She bites her lip as she takes in the sight.

 

"You haven't seen it yet?" I ask.

 

She simply shakes her head. "Do you want to?"

 

"No, but is it really that bad?"

 

"Mm-hmm."

 

I let out a sigh. Of course, if it feels bad it's going to look worse. "Well, there is no reason to just stare at it. Let's rewrap it, 'kay!"  

 

She opens a bottle of rubbing alcohol and soaked a cotton ball in the liquid. With a pair of tweezers, she dabs the cotton on my wound. I wince and bite my lips as the antibiotic comes in contact with my gash, making my nerves flare in pain.

 

"Sorry," my sister says.

 

"It's fine."

 

She nods and continues to clean the wound. I can only imagine what it looks like, right now I’m actually dreading looking in the mirror. I don’t want to see the kind of pain Shuu can inflict on me, feeling it is already enough. This is only a small thing the vampire can to do me. No one wants to think about the harm someone they care about can bring.

 

But I need to get over these emotion. Maybe seeing the injury would make me mad, maybe enough for this undesirable feeling to begin to fade.

 

“Yui, I think I want to see it.”

 

“You sure?”

 

I nod and get up. I stand in front of the mirror and gaze at my wound. Four medium size gashes run from the tip of my right shoulder to my collar bone. They are jagged and red. The top and bottom pairs almost connect, only a centimeter of skin divides them. I place my hand over them. I have had far worse gashes, but these seem to hurt the most. Shuu did this to me, he hurt me.

 

So why don’t I feel anger and hatred towards him? I feel more hurt than I did before seeing it. I feel heat rush to my face, but I overcome my emotions before they can show.

 

“Hikari, are you okay?”

 

“Mmm, let’s….let’s just finish this already.” I sit back on the toilet seat and my sister puts some kind for cream on it. She rubs it into the skin surrounding the gashes.

 

“Think it's going to need stitches?” she asks.

 

“Nah, they aren’t that wide,” I lie to my sister. If I told her that they do and Reiji won't stitch them up, she may go crazy. “They will close up soon enough. Now these, on the other hand,” I place my hand on my stomach where my scars are, ‘they needed stitches.”

 

She frowns when I mention my injuries from the past. “Can...can I ask you a question about them?”

 

“Huh, my scars?”

 

She nods hesitantly.

 

“Sure.”

 

“Did….did you get them all at once…. or did you... ur”

 

“...get them over time?” I finish. “Yeah, they were all over time. This one,” I trace my finger over the one farthest to the right, “was the first one.”

 

“I see.” I can tell by her discomfort that she doesn’t like the topic, so I stop there. I see her begin to unwind the bandage from the roll, so I stand up. She walks around me a few times with a frown.

 

“Hikari, you’re probably not going to like this.”

 

“What is it?” I ask, a bit on edge.

 

“The way Reiji wrapped it, well, you’re going to need to take off your bra.”

 

I blink at my sister. That vampire actually took off my clothes! Hikari, shut up. He had to tend to your injury, you should be grateful. Be happy Shuu didn’t rip open your tit.(A/N: This line killed me every time I reread this chapter xD) Well, at least I was unconscious and didn’t have to experience the awkwardness. Now I have to go through this with my sister.

 

I nod my head and unclip my bra once more. Yui looks down as I discard my underwear. I place my left arm over my exposed breast. Both mine and Yui’s cheeks turn the slightest color of pink. Oh god, this is too embarrassing. I’m not used to being so naked around my sister, another woman. I know most females would feel the total opposite: weird around guys but fine around their own sex.

 

Yui begins to wrap the muslin around my body. She covers the wound and wraps the cloth right under my breast to keep it still. She makes a few layers and then stops. I move my arm just enough to make sure I can use it. She nods and cuts the bandage. She takes some kind of double-sided hook and attaches it to the end of the bandage and the area near it.

She turns around and begins to put the supplies away. I take the moment to put my clothes back on.

 

“Thanks so much, Yui,” I say with a smile as I button my shirt back up.

 

“No problem. I rather me do it then one of the vampires.”

 

“Same.”

 

We walk out of the bathroom and into my room. I ease myself onto my bed and lay down. Yui stays standing.

 

“Are you mad at him?” she asks a bit out of the blue.

 

“Mad at who?”

 

“Shuu.”

 

I suck my bottom lip under my teeth. I honestly didn’t expect her to ask. “Surprisingly no. I’m… hurt.”

 

“Well, yeah. That’s a bit obvious.”

 

“No, not that,” I say looking at my shoulder. “I mean emotional. It hurts that he hurt me. Does that make sense?”

 

“Kind of.” She sits on the chair next to my bed.

 

“I honestly wanted to see the scars so I can be mad at him. I want to be mad at him.”

 

“You should, so why aren't you?”

 

“I… I can be honest with you, right?”

 

“Yeah, of course. We already said no lies, no secrets.”

 

“Yeah. Yui." I take a deep breath to calm my shaking nerves. I want to tell her, but if feels so weird to say aloud. Come on Hikari, she's your sister. She would accept it and give you her honest opinion. "I think I fell for him," I say, rushing the words out of my mouth.

 

She looks at me blankly for what feels like an hour. "You like Shuu?" she echoes, which comes out like a question.

 

"A little, kind of, maybe..." I respond hesitantly, cringing a bit.

 

"I don't know why this is so surprising. I knew you had feelings for him, the same with Subaru and me-"

 

"I knew it!" I exclaim, cutting off my sister. I smile like a mad person and clap my hands together. "It is totally obvious you like him.”

 

“This is about you, not me,” she says blushing. “Well, speaking of Subaru, I have to meet him.” She rises from her seat.

 

“Why?”

 

“We have to head out to the library and mall. I need some research material and supplies for a project. Subaru convinced Reiji to let me go out and get the things myself. Somewhere during their discussion he said he would go with me to make sure nothing happens.”

 

“Oh, so now you’re going to start hanging with Subaru in private.” I lift my eyebrow and my sister rolls her eyes with a smile.

 

“Whatever, besid-”

 

“Bitch-chan,” a sing-song voice calls from outside the door. I stiffen as Laito opens the door to my room smiling as wide as ever. “Bitch-chan, there you are, I was looking all over for you.”

 

My sister remains frozen in place as the vampire comes closer to her. He softly touches her cheek and she flinches at the contact.

 

I clear my throat, causing the vampire to direct his attention on me. “Is there something you need from Yui?”

 

Laito smirk and sits on the bed beside me. “Since you’re injured, Reiji won't allow us to have any of your blood, so I must take Yui’s on your behalf.” He leans closer into me, so close I feel his breath on my ear. “Unless you're willing to give me some of yours.”

 

“Fuck off, Laito,” I snap with a deadly glare. My thoughts from Monday come back from when Reiji was interrogating me. Yup, I really do want this bastard to rot in hell.

 

“Such a foul mouth for a beautiful girl.” He places a hand on my cheek. “You should really fix that attitude of yours. Ayato has been telling me about how rude you have been these past few days. I think that you need to be punished. I haven’t taken up the offer since that tantrum of yours, and I think it's about time I do. I want you to come to my room within the next half hour, come too late and your punishment will be worse.”

 

He pulls away and leaves the room without another word. Yui looks at me then the door and then back to me. “What just happened?”

 

“Laito being Laito and harassing people,” I say rolling my eyes. “That doesn’t matter really. You need to go, Subaru is waiting for you.” I get up and pat her on the back. “Don’t have too much fun now.”

 

“Hikari,” she says embarrassed.

 

“Can you get me something?”

 

“What is it?”

 

“Please get me a CD player if you see one.”

 

“Um, sure.” She smiles and I fake one in return. We say our goodbyes and she leaves my room. I close the door behind her and lean against it. What does that pervert Laito have in mind? Multiple thoughts -all dirty because I’m dealing with Liato of course- about what he may be thinking of makes my blood run cold. None of them seem very delightful or tolerable.

 

I groan and slide down with my back against the door. I tuck my head into my knees and sigh. Like always, I’m just going to have to endure whatever is thrown my way. None of the punishments has been that bad, the worst of them all has to be Kanato’s, though. I wonder what Reiji and Shuu are going to come up with, if they are anything like the others, I should be fine.  A slap, change in title, and a bath is all that has happened to try and correct my behavior, again, none of them really causing me any real pain or suffering. Ugh, I sound like a masochist again.

 

I get off the floor and walk over to my dresser. I unbutton my white shirt and slip off my skirt. I dig through the drawers of my wardrobe to find something to wear. Laito, being the mega huge bastard he is, is probably going to bite me, regardless of what Reiji said. So finding clothes thought would cover me is the best way to prevent this. I find a pair of slacks and a grey, long sleeve shirt. I fight the agonizing battle of putting clothes on once more. I find the new house map I asked Yui to draw for me, the old one was probably dropped in Shuu’s room. The sketch guides me to the Fedora wearing vampire's room.

 

I knock on the door, but no answer comes from within. “Hey, Laito, I’m here.”

 

No answer.

 

“If you’re going to tell someone to go to the room at least be in there,” I mumble in frustration at the door. I hear a door open behind me and see Laito walking out of Ayato’s room. I hear Ayato saying something, but he stops when Laito catches my gaze and motions for his brother to be silent.

 

“Hikari, what a surprise,” Laito says with a smile walking closer to me.

 

“Oh please, don’t pull that bullshit, you told me to come, so I’m here. It's not like I want to be here.”

 

“If you don’t want to be here, why did you come so early? Do you really want to be punished that badly?”

 

“I told you she’s totally a masochist,” Ayato says from his doorway with a smirk.

 

My face goes red with anger and I clench my slightly trembling fist. “I don’t feel like waiting, I rather get it over with. If I had the choice I wouldn’t be waiting for you to get your ass in your room and hurry up and get this shit over with!” I snap crossing my arms in frustration. I dig my fingers into my arm, determined not to let either of them see my shaking hands.

 

“Oi, you better watch yourself Melo-” Ayato begin, his face red with anger, but is cut off by Laito.

 

“It's fine Ayato,” Laito assures. He is calm and smiles slightly. “I’m going to deal with her.”

He walks across the hall and opens the bedroom door for me. Oh, know you want to be a gentleman. I walk in and lean against the wall near the door. The vampire follows me in and closes the door. As soon as the door shuts my heart starts to pound even harder against my chest. I bite the inside of my cheek.

 

He walks towards me, making me tense. I notice he’s eyes are on the wardrobe on the other wall, and I sigh. Suddenly he hit the area of the wall right by left ear. I jump and let out an embarrassing squeak at the sudden movement. I tense up as he leans closer to me. I look him in the eye for only a millisecond before I looked down at the floor.

 

“Ayato was right,” he says. “You really are all bark no bite.” He leans in closer and I turn my head until my face touches the wall. I feel the heat of his breath come closer and I close my eyes. I feel his wet tongue lick my cheek, making my hair on the back of my neck stand up.

 

He leans back and moves his hand. I hear his footsteps walk to the other side of the room, but I don’t open my eyes. My knees soon feel weak and I slide against the wall and onto the floor. I open my eyes and look at the vampire. He seems to be searching for something in the closet. I wipe my cheek and take in the room.

 

The carpet is a rich green color. There is a green cushioned chair and desk in the middle of the floor. A marble fireplace on the wall to my left. There are two windows, both hid behind large green curtains. On the wall opposite to me is Laito’s bed. Its sheets are the same rich, emerald green as the other furniture. There is a gold headboard in front of a wall that is completely covered by heavy looking curtains. The room, in general, is littered with random items, desperately in need to be cleaned.

 

“Ah, here it is,” Laito exclaims. I look over to see some kind of clothing draped over his arms. He turns around and walk towards me. I stand up so I have a better view of whatever he has. He picks it up by the hanger so I can see it perfectly. My mouth opens in surprise and I’m lost for words.

 

“Cute isn’t it? It belonged to one of the brides, but she has no use for it now. So for the rest of the day you’re going to wear it.”

 

“D-Did you even ask Reiji about this?” I ask in protest staring at the outfit.

 

“He’ll be with it.”

 

“But you need to as-” The vampire grabs my left wrist and squeeze it tightly. I suck in a breath through my teeth.

 

“I’m sure you’re supposed to take whatever punishment you are given, am I right?” I nod my head, but he doesn’t seem satisfied. He twists my arm, forcing me onto my knees. “Articulate you whore!” he screams. “I’ve done my best to keep myself under control, but you are really starting to infuriate me.”

 

“I’m sorry,” I cry out. “Yes, you’re right.”

 

“Right about what?”

 

“Th-That I must accept the punishment given to me.”

 

He smiles wickedly and let’s go of my arm. I pull it back and rub my wrist, the area is more than likely going to have a bruise.

 

“Now be a good little slut and get dressed,” he says, throwing the costume on me. I pick up the clothes and walk over to the bathroom. He doesn’t seem to care about me dressing in private. I enter the bathroom and close the door. I throw the stupid costume on the toilet seat.

 

I stare at the maid outfit. It's very frilly, yet it's still nice looking. I strip off the clothes and put on the outfit. So much for trying to cover my skin. It has short sleeves, but it covers my bandage. The top part is two piece, exposing the top of my breast. The skirt stops at my thighs, just barely covering my scars. The apron is pearl white as if it is brand new. I noticed that on the hanger was also a pair of stockings and garter belt. I also put them on. At least the stocking goes up to my thighs, better covering my tattoos and scars. I comb out my hair with my fingers and put the headpiece on. I stare at myself in the mirror. Well, it could be worse, he could have asked me to put on lingerie. I shudder, the thought of him having some isn't an irrational one.

 

“What’s taking you so long? Do you need some help?” the vampire ask from outside the room.

 

“No, no I’m done,” I call out.

 

“Then hurry up and come out.”

 

I groan and leave the bathroom. Laito is on the bed doing what seems like a word puzzle. He looks at me and he smiles a toothy grin. “Well, well, well, doesn’t someone look sexy,” he states.

 

The comment makes my cheeks turn pink even with my effort not to blush. I grip the hem of my dress with my sweating fingers. I don’t look him in the eyes, this is too embarrassed. “What now, Laito?”

 

“No, no, I’m not Laito. For the rest of the day, you will be my maid.” I stiffen at the thought. His maid? I know I’m wearing the outfit, but I thought that that’s one of his weird turn-ons. So I have to actually play the part? “And do you know how a maid address their superiors?” he continues.

 

My eyes grow wide. No, I’m not calling him that. That it not his title, I’m not addressing anyone that way. “No, no I’m not calling you that,” I protest looking at the floor.

 

“What was that?” His voice is sharp and angered.

 

“Please, please don’t make me. Th-That’s not your title.” I feel my eyes burn as memories of the past come into my mind.

 

I hear him get off his bed and walk over to me. I turn away and close my eyes, but he grips my chin and pulls my face towards him.

 

“Hikari, open your eyes,” he says sternly. I bite my lip and open my eyes. His emerald ones stare down at me. The perverted and childlike Laito I have been living with has totally transformed. Now he is a much bigger pervert and his lively personality had been replaced by a stern and serious one.

 

“Right here, right know, I am your master. This is your punishment for being such a disrespectful, rude bitch since you got here. Got it Whore-chan?”

 

My stomach drops at the words. I feel a lump form in my throat, but I push it down. “Y-Yes, m-master,” I choke out. He smiles and let’s go of my chin. I feel as if I lost myself. I promised myself I would never be in this position again, but here I am, calling someone master. I didn’t want to have to be such a pitiful, sad excuse for a person. Obeying every word that is uttered by some person that thinks they’re above you.

 

Get a hold of yourself Hikari. Don’t fall into that depression again, this is nothing. This is only for a few hours, you can do this. You aren’t lower than anyone, he’s just messing with you. Don’t let him break you. And when it comes to our past, get the fuck over it.

 

I clench my jaw and look at the vampire. My seriousness takes him by surprise and he loses his smirk. “How can I please you today, master?” I ask sternly.

 

“Mmm, I don’t like this,” he response. “You need to smile, loosen up.”

 

I scowl at him and sigh. If I’m going to go through this for the rest of the day, I might as well not give him a reason to complain in the end. I smile and ask in the sweetest voice I can muster up, “How can I serve you today, master?” This is a huge blow to my already dwindling pride.

 

“Better,” he says with a smirk. “Hmm, you can start with cleaning the room.” He walks back to the bed and picks back up his puzzle book.

 

I roll my eyes at him, this is going to be a long day. I begin to pick up the random objects littering his floor. I fold clothes, shelf books, and vacuum. The whole time I feel Laito’s eyes piercing into me. Every time I bend over I feel as if he is staring at my butt, which only makes me think he can see my underwear because of short length of the dress.

 

“I notice the house is almost always spotless, but I never see any of you guys cleaning, how is that?” I ask.

 

“Hmm, are you talking to me?” he teases with a grin.

 

“How is that, master,” I spit out.

 

“One of the familiars usually tend to that kind of stuff when we’re out.”

 

“I see. Well, I’m done with the cleaning, what now, master?”

 

“Come sit down.”

 

“Pardon?” I ask flatly.

 

“You heard me, come sit with me.”

 

What is up with these weird request? I slowly walk over to his bed and sit down next to him. I sit so my feet are still off the edge and there’s space between us. He looks at me and I look right back at him.

 

“Come closer,” he coos. I scoot an inch closer to him. Clearly annoyed, he puts his book down and picks me up. He places me in his lap and I freeze. He combs his fingers through my hair and tucks some behind my right ear. His fingers are cold against my skin, making me shiver. He picks the book and pencil back up and begins to work on it again.

 

I sit still in his lap, refusing to make a move. I feel his chest slightly press against my back every time he inhales. His long arms on both sides of me, trapping me. I look at his puzzle trying to focus on something besides the vampire.

 

“This is ‘tablecloth’, master,” I state, pointing at a row on the page.

 

“Mmm, so it is, good job,” he writes it down and pats me on the head. I want to shake off the touch, but I stay frozen. I don’t help after that, I just gaze around the room.

 

After what seems like an eternity he tells me to get off. I’m relieved and slide out of his legs. He looks to the clock on the fireplace.

 

“It's about time for dinner,” he states getting off his bed.

 

“Okay.” I begin to walk to the bathroom.

 

“Where are you going?”

 

“To the bathroom to change, master?” I say in a ‘duh’ tone.

 

“No, no, no Whore-chan you’re staying like this until the night is over,” he says with a smirk.

 

“I’m what?!” I exclaim. “No way, no way am I staying like this. I’m not walking out there dressed in this maid outfit. Besides, the night is over, its 7:38 am.”

 

“Then you can just stay in here while I eat, although Reiji would get quite crossed.” He grins wider, baring his fangs. “Which one would you rather have, a punishment from Reiji or a stab to your pride?”

 

I bite my lip in frustration. This bastard! I groan and march to the door and throw it open. I want to curse him out, but I bite my tongue. I just need to eat and leave. I try to rush ahead of the vampire, but I realize I have no idea how to get to the dining room from this part of the house. My map is in my shirt in the bathroom. I end up following Laito all the way to the dining room.

 

He stops at the door and looks at me with a smirk. “Are you ready for everyone to see you in your cute dress, Whore-chan?”

 

“No, I’m not, master,” I groan. Even if I want to hurry up and get this over with, they’re all still going to see me. The thought makes me frustrated and embarrassed all at once. What will Shuu do? I’m really dreading him seeing me like this. I take a deep breath. It's fine Hikari just act normal. If you act normal, it will blow over fast.

 

I push open the door and walk in. Instantly all eyes are on me. I hear Yui gasp and I bite my lip even harder. Ayato smirk and I can see him staring at my exposed chest. Kanato and Subaru look at me with no expression. Reiji glares in our direction, his eyes burning holes into me. But I don’t care about any of them or their reactions, my eyes stay on one person.

 

Shuu locks eyes with me for a second before he looks away. I can’t tell what he’s thinking or read his expression. I walk over and sit next to Yui and Laito by me.

 

“Hikari,” Reiji say. “What are you wearing?”

 

“A maid costume,” I reply with an ‘obviously’ under my breath.

 

“Why are you wearing it?”

 

I look over to Laito, staring daggers into the smirking vampire.

 

“This is my punishment from-” I inhale, not wanting to say the final word around everyone. “my master,” I say, rushing the words out under my breath.

 

“Excuse me, from who?”

 

“Can we just eat?” I exclaim annoyed. The second eldest vampire narrows his eyes at me.

 

“Very well,” he says in defeat and everyone begins to eat. Throughout the meal, at least one person would be staring at me at any given time. I just wanted to scream at them, but that's the reason I’m in this position in the first place.

 

I finish my meal before anyone else and get up.

 

“Excuse me,” I say. I turn to leave, but I feel a hand grab my left arm and pull me. I stumble but catch myself. I’m right next to Laito’s face when I steady myself.

 

“Wait in the room for me,” he whispers into my ear. “And don’t forget to say goodbye to everyone for the day. You can do those two simple things, right?

 

“Yes, I can, master,” I whisper back and he lets go of my arm. I pull back and scan the room. Once more everyone eyes me. I look at Yui who looks more uneasy than me. I bend down next to her and whisper to her, “I’m fine, don’t worry about me.”

 

I walk to the door and turn around, looking everyone. I calm myself and look straight at Shuu. His eyes finally final meet mine. I want to look into them forever, but it soon becomes too much. I break our gaze before I completely lose myself. Remembering Laito's command, I bow and say, “Have a good rest, masters and milady. I will see in the waking hour.”

 

I turn back around and walk and the door, closing it behind me. I don’t move right away, I stay and listen for their reactions. It's silent for a moment, but it is soon disturbed by a howling laugh.

 

“Oh god, Laito," Ayato hollers. "How did you get her to do that? You make me feel as if I wasted my opportunity by making her call me 'Ayato-sama'."

 

"I simply told her that this was her punishment," Laito response in a proud voice like he was the one that taught me this. "Tell that to any masochist and they will do whatever you want."

 

I want to punch him so hard every time he says that word. I'm no masochist.

 

"Don't call her that," I hear Yui defend me. "That is just her way of making things right. She yelled at you guys last week and she knows that's not right. That's is why she told you guys she needed to be punished, not because she wants it, but because she knows her ill behavior can't just slide." I feel tears in my eyes as I listen to my sister defend me. It's taking all my willpower not to barge back in there and give her a hug. "She was raised like that, and you don't know what kind of conditi-"

 

"Yui," I hear a stern voice say. It takes me a moment to realize its Shuu. My heart flutters a bit when I hear him. I mentally thank him for stopping her before she told anything I wanted to remain unsaid.

 

"Laito, I can care less if you're going to make her wear such attire," Reiji begins. "But please don't make her wear it outside your private room. No one needs to see her like that. This isn't for her sake, though." Of course, Reiji doesn't care, why would he? “And if you have a recommendation for her punishment, inform me about it first.”

 

"She looks pretty sexy, though," Ayato states.

 

"Agreed," Shuu say with a sigh. Everyone goes quiet after hearing the eldest opinion. My face flush hearing him say that. Shuu thinks I look sexy. Stop that, get a hold of yourself Hikari.

 

"Excuse me, I'm leaving," Yui says and I hear the sound of her chair sliding across the floor. "I'm not just going sit here and listen to you guys talk about my sister like she's some kind of doll."

 

I have no time to react before the door to the dining room is open. I duck down, not wanting any of the vampires to see me eavesdropping. Yui walks out of the room with a rock hard expression. She turns and heads to the greeting area.

 

I silently follow her until she gets to the stairway. “Hey, Yui, wait up,” I call out.

 

She jumps in surprise and turns around to look at me. “Hikari, what are you still doing here?” she asks, shocked.

 

“I don’t know my way back.” Not the truth neither a lie.

 

“You don’t know the way back to your room by now?”

 

“I do, I need to go to Laito’s, though.”

 

“Oh, okay I will walk you back then.” I take a few steps to catch up to her and we begin to make our way to Laito’s room.

 

“He’s serious about the whole maid thing?” she asks looking me up and down.

 

“Yeah, I know, completely ridiculous,” I answer rolling my eyes. “The worst part is that he’s making me call him ‘master’. I can care less about this stupid dress and doing whatever he wants, but addressing him like that, I just hate it.”

 

Yui places a hand on my back and rubs circles in it. “It will be over soon. He can only keep you so long. And by the way, Reiji acted, it's is going to be over soon.”

 

“Yeah, I guess. Thanks for standing up for me, I highly appreciate it.”

 

“You heard that?” She looks down in embarrassment.

 

“I was kind of eavesdropping. I just wanted to know what was happening.”

 

“So you heard what Shuu said?”

 

I smile slightly and nod.  “Do you usually do that? You know, say what you feel.”

 

“Honestly, no. I’ve only done it like one other time.” She looks at me with a smile. “I guess you’re rubbing off on me some.”

 

We make it to Laito’s room before we know it. Yui asks if I want her to stay, but I politely decline the offer. I walk around the room once more. Nothing has changed in the past twenty minutes, but I still scan the room.

 

I pull out the chair and sit in it, laying my head down in my arms. When is this going to be over? All I want to do right now is go to my room and go to sleep. I have been sleeping well, but I feel as if I need more than usual after this crap with Laito.

 

As if being called by my thoughts, Laito opens the door with a grin. “I back my little maid.”

 

“Welcome back, master,” I mutter out of pure sarcasm. He walks over to me and lays a hand on my head which I quickly slap off. “Don’t touch me.”

 

I look up and see Laito giving me a fake pout. “What’s wrong? You were being such an obedient maid earlier,” he says.

 

“I’m sick of playing your stupid game, this is bullshit.”

 

“Now, now, Whore-chan.” He places his hand back on my head.

 

“Stop calling me that, I’m not a whore! And I said not to touch me!”

 

Laito seriously frowns and narrows his eyes at me. He takes my elbow and pulls me out the chair, causing the seat to fall with a loud thud.

 

“Hey, hey Laito stop,” I say as he drags me across the room. I try to pull away, but his grip is far too hard. He pushes me on the bed onto my back.

 

He gets right on top of me, his legs between mine. He leans in and I feel him lick my neck. I try to shove him off with no avail. I feel the vampire’s fangs on my skin, but he doesn’t bite. He traces them over my neck and lightly gnaws on me, but never actually piercing my skin.

 

“Laito, Laito get off of me,” I hiss.

 

“I’m your master, address me as so,” he says. “Also,” he moves his hand to one of my breasts, “I can touch you all I want.” He scrunches my breast, his cold fingers groping me.He pulls down of the maid top and bra in one tug. I squirm to break free, but he takes each of my wrist in his hands.

 

“You know, if I have to hold you down, I can’t play with your beautiful boobs,” he says. “I guess I must improvise.” He moves his face down to my tits. Even though his breath is warm, I shiver. His tongue comes in contact with my breast. I don’t want to give him the satisfaction of any pleasure, so I remain silent.

 

He looks up at me with a frown. “Are you going to fight the pleasure?” He takes my nipple in between his lips. He presses them together, my nipple squished between them. He’s tongue flicks over it and he sucks. I push my own lips together to suppress a pleasure filled moan. He smirks and moves to my neglected breast. He licks circles around raspberry size flesh. He sucks hard and let’s go with a loud pop sound.

 

“Why aren’t you fighting back anymore, Whore-chan?” he asks. I look to the side with shame. My muscles has lost all of their strength and I lay limply on the bed.

 

“Shut up,” I snap.

 

“I’m really not liking your foul mouth.” He gets up and I try to do the same. “Stay right there or you’ll regret it.” He opens the drawer and I hitch a breath. Please don’t bring out a condom, I don’t want sex. Please. He doesn’t. He pulls out something much worse.

 

“No,” I say. I try to get off the bed, but he grabs my bad arm, pain shoots up through my limb.

 

“I told you not to move,” he says in a disappointedly with a shake of his head. Before I can say a word, he places the ball gag in my mouth. I know how these things work, but I try to get it out anyways. He pushes my arms in front of me and leans his chest against my back. He pushes me so my stomach is on the bed and he is on top of me. Keeping his body against mine so I couldn’t use my hands, he tightens the gag around my head. I try to push it out with my tongue before it was too tight, but I lost the opportunity.

 

“Now that’s better,” he says with a wicked smile. He gets off my back and gazes at me. I’m about to get up but is pushed down once more. “Don’t get up again, I mean it.”

 

I turn my head so I can see behind me. Laito inspects my butt with an evil smile. He lifts up my skirt and pulls it down so it is draped over my back. I feel him trace the hem of my underwear and stockings. I feel him begin to take off the garter belt.

 

“Mmmm-mmm,” I try to tell him no, but the word come out as an uninterruptible mumble. I shake my head and try to get up. The next thing I feel is a hard slap to my ass. It takes me a moment to realize that he just spanked me. It had been over two years since I have last been hit on my butt by someone’s bare hand.

 

“I told you not to move. Do it again and you will get another,” Laito says. I stay with my ass in the air and face on the bed, body crushing my arms. My face itches from my hair being fanned over it, but I’m in no position to fix it. I glare at Laito spitefully, and I would have long spat out a string of curse words if it hadn’t been for the ball in my mouth.

 

“You look so sexy like this,” the perverted vampire says as he gazing over my body. I feel his hands on my rear again and I stiffen. He softly rubs each cheek. He trails over them, only squeezing a bit here and there. He lowers his cool limbs down to my front and I try to move my hips away.

 

Another hard slap finds its way towards my butt. “You must stay still, Whore-chan. Would you rather me tie you down?” I shake my head and he smiles. “So. Stay. Still.”

 

His fingers trail back to my panties and I feel him rub my wet spot. I shudder a bit at the contact and a small moan makes its way from my throat. He slides my panties to the side and sticks a single digit in me. I bite down on the gag until my teeth start to hurt. Don’t moan, don’t show pleasure.

 

He adds another finger and I scrunch my eyes close. He began to make scissor motions in me and my eyes shoot open. He stretches open my wall and I feel them close back around his fingers. “Nnngghh,” I moan out into the gag.

 

He chuckles and I feel myself flip over. I’m on my back once more, facing upwards towards Laito. He leaned in close and I put my arms up in protest. He takes them and puts the left one under me. He raises the right towards his mouth.

 

“Whore-chan, when will you ever learn to listen? Even after all the pain Natsume probably put you through, he failed to teach you how to obey simple commands.” Anger flares in me when he brings up Natsume. But the heat in my face soon travels to my wrist as the vampire sinks his fangs into my hand. I don’t even try to pull away, I know I would just add more gashes onto my body. He sucks so hard on my wrist, I know there is going to be not only piercings but a hickey.

He releases his fangs and licks the piercing, staring down at me. “You really mess me up,” he says licking my wrist. I crane my head and see a large bulge in his pants. He releases my hand and moves his hand down to the zipper on his pants.

 

My eyes go wide and I thrash to get from under him. I try to kick off the vampire before he can get any further, but he holds me down with a single hand.

 

“What happened to you?” he ask with a frown. “When you first got here, you were basically begging me to have sex. Now you’re putting up such a fight.”

 

Because I promise myself to stop, that I was no longer going to do this. That I wasn’t going to turn into a sex maniac. I can’t do this when my heart belongs to someone else.

 

“Laito stop. Please, I don’t want this,” I say, but of course Laito couldn’t understand my words with the ball in my mouth. I pull my hands from under myself and place them on his chest. I don’t try to push him off. I stay still, no longer kicking and thrashing. I look up at him with pleading eyes. I know I can no longer communicate through my mouth, so I convey my feelings through my body. I stop fighting, I surrender, but I still plead for him to stop.

His face softens for a moment as if he noticed what I’m trying to say. But the moment is gone and I see him smirk. “I guess I’ve won,” he says and plunges himself into me.

 

I howl out into the gag and arch my back. He just rammed into me, not even giving me a moment. I feel tears sting in my eyes and I clench Laito’s shirt. He snickers and begin to pull out of me until only the tip of him is inside of me. I know what is going to happen next and I brace myself. As I anticipated he rams back into me. I tighten my grip on him- why am I holding onto him? - as he begins to thrust in and out of me.

 

The all too familiar pain explodes through my lower regions. The vampire thrusts his hips into me continuously without giving me a moment to adjust. He rocks himself in and out and the pain gradually numbs, but I don’t let go of him.

 

While he still pushes himself into me, he leans over and takes my breast back into his mouth. He begins to lick and suck on them once more. He violently gropes my left one, sinking his fingers into my breast.

 

“Even with that ball in your mouth, I can still hear your lewd moans of pleasure,” Laito say. I ignore him and turn my head. Why am I being pleasured while being raped?

 

Laito still thrusting into me, the sound of flesh hitting flesh echo off of the room’s wall. I feel his member grow and my walls tighten. He pulls out, and, with a groan of pleasure, releases his seeds on to me.

 

Panting, he reaches over and undoes the fastened gag. He pulls it out, a strand of saliva linking my mouth and the ball. I feel drool on my cheek, but I don't move to wipe it.

 

Laito leans in and kisses my slack mouth. "That was perfect, Whore-chan," the vampire says. I don't speak. He gets up, zips up his fly, and walks to the bathroom.

 

Slowly, I close my legs and bring my knees up to my exposed chest. I don't bother to fix my clothes, I just lay there. This feeling I haven't felt in so longs aches back up. Violation. I was completely and utterly violated, and there was nothing I could do. I fought and struggled, but I was still utterly helpless.

 

I hear the shower run in the bathroom and the door open once again. I stay still as the vampire comes towards me. Surprisingly, he picks me up and takes me over to the bathroom. He puts me down on the toilet seat and leaves the room.

 

After a minute or so, I get up and begin to take off my clothes. I don't think twice about going into the shower with the bandage still wrapped around my body. I wash my body with the cloth that was neatly folded on top of a towel I found on the counter. I wash the cloth over my stomach until I reach my scars. I drop the cloth and place my bare hand on my scars.

 

I then begin to cry.

 

I wrap my arms around my marked skin and sob hysterically. I told myself no more, no more. But there I was, completely at Laito's mercy. I said less than a week ago that I wanted to change, but I can't. Why won’t this shitty world let me change for the better? I no longer what to be this way, that's all ask for. I know there isn't a god to hear and grant my wishes, so there isn't a force or being to hate.

 

I cry my eyes raw and get out of the shower. I don't bother drying myself properly. I throw on my underwear and pants. I take my shirt in hand, I'm not going to struggle to put this on. I don't think I would be able to put it on with this wet bandage. I don't mind if any of them see me without a shirt, I have lost the ability to care for the rest of the day.

 

I open the door and Laito is no longer in the room. I leave before he can get me back into the maid outfit. I walk to my room without seeing any of the brothers or Yui.

 

When I reach my room, I fall onto my bed. I don't want to do anything or see anyone. I don’t want to think about vampires or bites or scars. I just want to sleep and dream. Dream of a world where the night of November 10th never unfolded the way it did. Where Kaname lived and I stayed with the twins. No cell, whips, and screams, just living my days peacefully with them. And after all that time together, they would want me to stay with them, and I do. And since I was safe, I could leave the house. I’m able to go to school and make friends. I meet Nanami and go to her and Kaname’s wedding I always daydreamed about. When the twins had to go to America, I would be right there on the plane with them. And after Kaname took over the company, it would just be Natsume and me. I would spend my days with my loving Natsume. The demon inside him never coming out to hurt me. Natsume would still love me like he always did. He would hold me close every night, promising never to let go.

 

That is the world I dream of when sleep finally takes me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did you guys like the chapter? Hikari is trying to change her ways. She admits she's crushing on Shuu, but her feelings towards Natsume are still lingering.
> 
> Comment your thoughts about it.


	22. Questions

“I’m just saying that you looked damn sexy in that dress,” Ayato says for the millionth time.

 

“Like I said, I never wanted to wear that stupid thing,” I say as I remove a book from the shelf in the library. “Your brother is just a sicko. If I have the chance, I would burn the damn costume just for even existing. Along with the person that had the perverted idea of cutting the dress from its original length.”

 

I flip through the book and return it back to its spot on the shelf.

 

“Is there an English literature part of this library, Ayato-sama?”

 

“Do I look like a fucking librarian?” he spits out leaning against the wall.

 

“No, you don’t, which bring back up my question: why did you feel so compelled to join me in this trip to the library? You obviously don’t like it, you’re not getting a book, so why must you bother me?”

 

“Don’t question Yours Truly,” he snaps back. I roll my eyes at his reply. I left History because I didn’t want to be near him. I walk over to the librarian's desk and ask about the English section and she points me to the direction of my desired location. I thank her and walk over to the area.

I scan the spines of the books, looking for any that interest me. I groan when I hear the vampire’s footsteps behind me.

 

“You actually read this foreign crap?” Ayato says, tugging a book off the shelf.

 

“They are very intriguing,” I reply. “It's nice to see what things are trending on the other side of the world.”

 

“But you actually read it. English is such a stupid language, way too complicated.” He flips through the pages, book backwards, with a face of disgust.

 

“Well, yeah, it's complicated, but I’m pretty fluent in it.”

 

“Shut up, Melons.”

 

This time, I’m the one smirking. “What, not really good at English, Ay-a-to-sa-ma?” I tease, pronouncing each syllable of his title one by one.

 

“It doesn’t even matter, not like I’m ever going to need to say a word in that stupid language. Besides, I bet you never wanted to learn it either.” My smile leaves my face and I narrow my eyes at him in confusion. “I bet that Natsume person forced you to learn it.”

 

“He did not!” I protest. “I asked him to teach me, it was basically necessary. It was very American like in that household. Kaname read many Engli-”

 

“Kaname,” Ayato says interrupting me, raising his eyebrow. “What was he like? I bet he was as sadistic as the other.”  I stiffen as I realize I have said too much. Stupid Hikari, you don’t need to tell him anything about that house. I put the book back on the shelf and lower myself onto my knees so I can see the books lower on the shelf.

 

“No one,” I say through clenched teeth as I pull a random book of the shelf. No, that’s a lie. He was someone, someone that meant so much to Natsume, to me. He was my friends, my companion, my saviour. He is the one that I cared for so much, yet I killed him.

 

“Now you’re lying to me?”

 

“I’m not lying.”

 

“Those idiots Keita and Haru already told me that they were brothers, twins to be exact.”

 

I clench the book in my hands as I read the summary on the back.

 

“Yeah, okay, they were brothers I lived with,” I spit out. Why am I so mad? “They were just two kids my father thought could take care of me.” Another lying, such a lie. “Same exact conditions as now, expect they weren’t blood sucking vampires.” I get up with two novels in my hand, and I begin to walk to the librarian's desk once again and check out the books. Ayato is right behind me, never leaving my side.

 

“You never answered my questions,” he states out of the blue.

 

“And that is?”

 

“What have you been doing during lunch.”

 

I sigh in frustration, can he just get off my back. “Why do you want to know, planning on bothering me during the one hour I have to myself?”

 

“Stop trying to go around it and give me a damn answer!” he says a bit too loud, gaining some attention from surrounding students.

 

“I’ve been in detention for the past two days and the rest of the week, happy?”

 

“Detention?” he is a bit taken back by my answer.

 

“Yes, as in the room you go to and sit there for an hour. You’ve been there, right Ayato-sama?” I hiss.

 

He narrows his eyes at me. “What was so bad you got detention?”

 

“When were you so interested in my life?” I counter, annoyance weighing down my words.

 

“Why don’t you just answer the question like a normal person?”

 

I groan, this question to question game is getting quite annoying. “I skipped class Monday.”

 

“That’s right,” he says placing his hands behind his head. “Laito told me you weren’t in Science or Home Ed.”

 

“So you two are stalking me or something,” I say bluntly.

 

He seems to be the one that has said too much now. The last thing he says is,“Just shut up, Melons,” before pushing his lips together.

 

We walk back to class in silence. We enter as soon as the chimes ring. I quickly pick up my bag and make my way to detention. As if to see if I was lying, Ayato follows me to the detention room. I walk into the room and he continues down the hall. I let out a sigh of relief that goes unnoticed due to the sound of the chimes echoing throughout the halls. The seat I have usually been sitting in was empty as always, so I plant myself there.

 

I open the book I got from the library and begin to read. The character, Winnie Foster, complains about her life being bottled up in her house. She hates the day to day struggle to try and achieve the expectations her family sets. I know how you feel with one of those problems, girl. No one likes to be caged when there is such an amazing world out there.

 

“Ms.Komori,” the detention adviser calls out.

 

“Right here,” I say raising my hand. She motions for me to come over to her. I get up and make way over to her, all eyes on me. “Yes, ma’am?”

 

“You aren’t on the list today,’ she states.

 

“Pardon?”

 

“You aren’t serving detention today.”

 

“Are you sure?”

“Just take the invite,” a delinquent-looking students from the back of the class says. His feet are prompt on the desk, arm crossed, leaning back. “Any of us would kill to get the chance to leave his boring hell hole.”

 

“Watch yourself Mr.Rin,” the teachers says with a stern voice. “He’s right, though, just go already.”

 

I nod and walk back to my desk and collect my stuff. I walk out the door in confusion. I’m sure that I had to serve for the rest of the week, why am I being let out? The teachers probably just saw my difference in behaviour during class so they shorted my time. I try to shrug it off, but the question still lingers in my mind.

 

Happiness surged through my body as I realize I can go where ever now. I grin like a fool as I make my way to the music room. As as I get to the door, though, my stomach twisted into a knot. Shuu’s in there. What is he going to do? Will he bring up the bite or just brush it off?

 

I have my hand on the handle, ready to open the door, but I freeze. From inside the room, the melodic sound of a piano rings out. The piece is slow and calming yet dark and mysterious. I immediately recognize it as Beethoven’s Moonlight Sonata, one of his most famous works. I stand on the other side of the door from the vampire. The melody brings me close to the edge. The mysterious vibe it gives off makes me feel as if a threat is on the other side of the room. Come on Hikari, don’t be stupid.

 

When the piece ends I remain where I am. I’m again about to open the door, but stop as a new piece begins to play. I don't recognize the melody, but it calms my nerves. I listen as the slow piece is played. I close my eyes and take a deep breath. By the time this one is over, I have been standing here for about ten minutes.

 

I slowly open the door to the music room. Shuu sits on the bench, eyes looking my way. The energy leaves my body and I stay standing in the doorway for a lifetime, but anyone on the outside would say it was only a few seconds. Our eyes lock, neither one of us breaking the connection. I’m sure I stopped breathing when I gazed into his orbs, my heart skipping at least two beats. Those sapphire blue eyes have gone back to normal, no longer filled with bloodlust.

 

“Hi, Shuu,” I manage to get out. I step into the room and close the door behind me. I have no idea what to call the thick fog in this room, but whatever it conscious of is making me choke, not allowing any more words to leave my mouth.

 

My heart that was starting to skip beats starts to make extra, sure to crack one of my ribs. My palms get a bit moist and I clench my bag.

 

“Hey,” he says softly.

 

That one simple word seems to have done something to me. The uneasiness arises from me. My week knees are now able to fully support me. What ever was caught in my throat is easily swallowed and the words are able to leave my mouth with ease.

 

“I heard you playing from outside,” I state, but he stays silent. “It sounded really nice. I don’t know the last one you played, though. I was really taken back, I didn’t know you played. Well, I know you played, you’ve shown me.”  I babble like an idiot, not really knowing what to say. “I didn’t think you actually played for the hell of it, you know what I mean?”

 

My feet moved me without approval and I’m right next to the vampire in a moment.  “Does this mean that you were the one playing? I mean, I think it was last week, I sat down to play and the seat was adjusted in a different way.” I sit down on the bench next to him. “Yup, totally different from how I had it last time.”

 

Hikari what are you doing, what are you thinking. You are rambling like some lovesick girl talking to her crush for the first time. He’s going to think you’re a complete idiot and regret ever looking at you. I swear I had this same feeling with Subaru.

 

“You’re back,” he whispers so softly I doubt I even heard him correctly.

 

I look at him. “Hmm, yeah. Oh, I’m sorry I wasn’t here for the past few days, I had detention. I was supposed to have it for the rest of the week, but I was cut short. Lucky me, eh?”

 

“Why did you come back?”

 

“Wha-what do you mean ‘why did I come back’?” I mutter, eyes falling onto the black and white keys. My nerves are a shaken mess, and words become hard to form once again. “I...I came back because..because,” I trail off. I know why I returned, but saying it aloud makes me feel queasy. I clench my hands to my skirt and look the vampire in the eyes. “Because I wanted to be here..with  you.”

 

My answer surprised him more than his question did to me. A small, half smile forms on his face.The expression change makes my heart flutter and a stupid looking grin finds its way on my own face. The tension and uneasiness completely leave the room, it’s replaced with a light-hearted atmosphere.

 

“So, Shuu, owner of the music room,” I say cheerfully, “Am I still allowed in this sanctuary of yours?”

 

“Sanctuary?”

 

“Just answer the question.” I roll my eyes with a small giggle. A giggle, I just giggled! I’m so pathetic!

 

“Whatever,” is his simple response, but I’m not asking for another word.

 

I press the keys in front of me at random. No coherent pattern or a specific piece, just the sound of the piano echoing into the silence.

 

“What are you doing?’

 

“Nothing,” I reply. “Hey, what was that song you were playing just now?”

 

“You don’t know Moonlight Sonata?”

 

“I know that, everyone knows that one. I mean the second one, the last one you played.”

 

“Chopin’s Nocturne in Eb.” He gets off the bench and walks over to the shelf packed with music sheets. He looks through the folders until he finds a stack of papers clipped together. He walks over and hands them to me.

 

“Can you teach me how to play it?” I ask holding the paper.

 

“Sure,” he response with a shrug.

 

“Oh yeah, before I forget, do you have an extra pair of earphones?”

 

“Why would you need them?”

 

I unzip my bag and dig in it. After a moment, I fish out the CD player Yui got me. “Yesterday I asked Yui to buy me one of these. I wasn’t really thinking and I forgot to ask her for a pair of earphones. I’m not quite sure if this is the kind that could work without them, but I still want a pair.”

 

“I will see if I have a pair when we get home.”

 

It’s a bit odd hearing him actually call the mansion home. Even after almost three weeks of staying there, I still find referring it as ‘home’ odd.

 

I see him walk over to the other side of the room and lay down on the couch.

 

“What are you doing?”

 

“Have you already forgotten our deal? You play for an exchange of being in this room.”

 

I internally laugh at him, of course, he is going to bring that back up. I open my bag and bring out a box of pocky.

 

“Can I not play today?”

 

“Just got back and already want to take a break, how lazy.”

 

“No, it is just…” I want to tell him I think my injury may prevent me from playing properly, but I hold back the statement. I don’t want to bring up what happened. I don’t dare ruin the perfect mood we finally achieved. “Yeah, I’m being lazy, but just for today.” I walk over to him and sit down against the couch. I lift up the box of pocky, offering him one. He takes one and slowly bites it. I take one and bite it in half.

 

“Don’t go to sleep know,” Shuu warns.

 

“I‘m not.”

 

There is a moment of silence, the only noise in the breaking of the pocky sticks.

 

“Sorry about Monday,” the vampire says out of the blue.

 

The apology takes me by surprise and I choke on the snack bits in my mouth. I swallow and cough a bit. “Come again.”

 

“Monday I woke up right before the period ended. I saw you sleeping and just left you. I should have woken you up, but I just let you sleep.”

 

I blink blankly at the vampire. I could have made it to class, but he decided not to wake me. Like yesterday, I should be angry at Shuu, completely enraged, but the feeling never comes over me. What do I say? Do I play it off, scold him?

 

“What did you do then, watch me sleep?” I joke.

 

“I told you before, I’m not a perv like those stupid redhead brothers of mine.”

 

“Right, sorry. I would choose sleep over almost anything, so doesn’t matter, eat,” I say, thrusting the snack box in his face so he can eat and be silent. Too much talking leads to awkwardness, something I don’t want to bring back into the room. He takes another stick and I smile.

Shuu and I stay in that room, eating pocky in silence for the rest of the period.

 

* * *

 

I stare at the gashes that still mark my skin in the mirror. A thin layer of skin, not yet hardened into a scab, has formed over each of the gashes, the skin around them a bright pink. I still don’t stretch my arm too much, caution about not reopening the wound. After the time in the music room with Shuu, I felt as if everything that has happened in the past was so long ago. But I tell myself that I can’t forget, that I have to remember. I do forgive him, although I was never actually mad at him.

 

The creaking of my bedroom door snaps me out of my thoughts. I tug my bandages back over my wound and slip my arm back through my shirt sleeve. I walk to the bathroom door and peer out. I see movement behind the door one second, but it's gone in the next. I walk out and look into the hallway, the only visible life are is a plant at the end of the hall.

 

I scan the room, searching for anything out of place. My eyes fall onto a pair of white earphones on my dark purple and blue sheets. I smile to myself and pick them up. They are clearly new, still wrapped neatly and tied with a twisted wire. I mentally thank Shuu and place them on my nightstand alongside the CD player. I should have gotten a CD from the music room before leaving so I could try out the player, but I didn’t want to move from beside Shuu, even when it was time for me to go to class.

 

I walk out my room and down the halls until I get to the front door. I don’t have any work left to do, even though I had extra, which did puzzle me. My science teacher gave me superfluous work because I no longer have detention, which is odd. Why take me out of detention just to give me extra  work? I brush it off and open the front door.

 

A gust of wind hits me as soon as the door opens. It is cold and feels great on my skin. I place my shoes on the floor and slide my feet into them.

 

“Where are you going,” a voice behinds me ask, making me jump in surprise. I turn to see Kanato hugging his bear, wide, purple eyes staring at me.

 

“Outside.” I slipping on my left shoe.

 

“Dress like that?”

 

I look down at my clothes. I have my long sleeve, pink blouse and the same black slacks from yesterday. My hair is fashioned in a high ponytail, nothing special. “Yeah, is there something wrong with it?” I counter.

 

“You look like you’re going somewhere.”

 

“No, just going to walk around the property.”

 

“Don’t.”

 

His command takes me by surprise. He voice is stern and serious. Why is he acting like this?

 

“Why not?”

 

“I want cake,” he says like a child.

 

“You want cake,” I repeat.

 

“Make me a cake, now.”

 

I stare at him and he does the same for me. We don’t break eye contact as if we are challenging each other. I raise an eyebrow, but his expression doesn’t change.

 

“Okay, I will bake a cake.”

 

I take off my shoes and place them by the door, sure to come back to them. My plans are just being postponed, but I’m sure am going to be able to slip outside soon. I go over to the kitchen and the purple hair vampire follows. I take out the necessities for any cake: flour, eggs, butter, sugar, and baking powder. I open the pantry and find the apron I used to make the macaroons and put it on.

 

“What kind of cake to you want?”

 

“Chocolate layered cake,” he responds specifically. I get out the remaining ingredients and tools. I then measure, stir, sift, and mix the ingredients into a bowl. I get the three circle cake pan, evenly divide the batter into them, and place them in the over. I wipe my hands on the apron and look over at Kanato who has been talking to Teddy the whole time.

 

“Any preferred icing?” I ask. He doesn’t reply, he just continues to talk to the bear. “Excuse me, Kanato.”

 

He lifts his gaze from the stuffed animal and looks at me. “What?”

 

“Is there a certain icing flavor you want?”

 

“Why are you asking me?”

 

“This is your cake.”

 

“Do whatever you like.” I turn around and roll my eyes. I’m not going to make the icing now then, I’m going to wait until the cake is finished.

 

“Let me see your shoulder,” the vampire orders suddenly. I turn around at him, eyebrows knitted in confusion. “Your shoulder, I heard you were injured and I want to see it,” he says casually.

 

“Wha..why do yo-”

 

He bangs on the marble counter with his fist. He stands up, causing the stool he was sitting on to fall. “Do I need to rip off your shirt?” he says raising his voice, shaking me. His mood swings do scare me a bit. He’s a quiet, childlike boy that is transformed into a crazy person over the smallest thing.

I don’t dare anger then vampire anymore and I begin to do as he says. I unbutton the three circle buttons of shirt. I pull my arm from the sleeve and bring it out from my shirt. I use my left hand to pull down the slight loose cloth. I reveal the four gashes that were hidden under the bandage.

Kanato comes close, leaving Teddy on the island. He touches the wound softly. I flinch at the touch.

 

“Did I hurt you?” he ask like he cared, a totally personality change.

 

“No,” I say. I just don’t like the touch of your cold fingers on me. He leans forwards, coming closer to me. I take a step back. “Reiji said I’m not supposed to be bitten. Especially not here.”

 

“So rude,” he says taking a step forward. “Did Laito bite you yesterday?”

 

“Y-yes, but I don-”

 

“Where?”

 

“My right wrist, but that has no-” Kanato takes my right forearm and pulls it up to his face, inspecting my flesh.

 

“Do you see anything here?” he asks showing me my wrist. I expect to see the aftermath of yesterday’s chaotic events. To my surprise, there isn’t. No piercing, no hickey, just may smooth, unmarked skin. I shake my head at the vampire.

 

“Did he lick it?” Kanato asks with a sigh.

 

I narrow my eyes at him. “Yes, he did.” I don’t know exactly where this is going. He moves closer to me and I back up until I feel the counter touch my back. He places a hand on each of my shoulders. I look at him worried, but he stares at me as if he's annoyed.

 

“How rude are you?” he leaned down so his face is right by the wound. He looks up and me with a frown. “I try to thank you, help you actually, and you won't accept it. You just try and run away. Like I said, rude.” With that, he looks back down at the injury.

 

I don’t see how a bite is going to help me, or how it's a thank you. I close my eyes waiting for the vampire’s fangs to pierce into my wound. I feel his wet tongue make contact with my flesh. He slowly licks each one individually. After a going over the last one, I feel the muscle leave my shoulder. I bite my lip, waiting for him to stop and sink his fangs into my skin.

 

But the bite never.

 

I take a breath and open an eye. He’s across the room, Teddy in hand, opening the kitchen door.

He looks back at me and says, “Don’t burn my cake.” With that, he closed that door.

 

I blink blankly at the door. I move my hand over to the jagged openings. The shoulder feels weird, almost numb, but not quite.

 

I slowly recover from the shock and fix my bandage and shirt. I walk over the sink to wash my hands. What was all of that about? Does Kanato just lick people to say thank you? He said that it would help me. He also brought up Laito licking me. How is that related?

 

I try to find a pattern. Last night Laito licks my wrist after biting me, he has never done that before. This is also the first time I have been bitten and the mark wasn't left. Was it because he licked me? I think back to the weekend when Yui and I were done at the lake. She was scratched by a cat and Subaru licked the wound. After that night, I didn’t see a mark left on her forearm. And today, Kanato did the same action on my gashes and know they feel weird. I didn’t have this feeling with Laito. Well, maybe I did and I was just too preoccupied to notice.

 

Do vampires have the ability to heal wounds with a simple lick? The question seems weird, yet not illogical. Well, everything about them is illogical.

 

“Are you just going to let the water run?” a voice says. I look over to see Reiji in the doorway. I look at the faucet, my hands under the stream of water. I was so deep in thought I kind of daze out.

 

“Oh, sorry,” I say as I turn off the water and dry my hands.

 

The vampire sniffs the air. “Are you baking something?”

 

“Yeah, a cake. Kanato said he wanted a chocolate cake.”

 

“So you just make him one because he ordered you to do so?” the vampire asks raising an eyebrow.

 

“No,” I say raising my chin a bit. “Just had nothing better to do.”

 

“I need to start the preparations for dinner,” Reiji says walking into the kitchen.

 

“Do you need any help?”

 

“Your assistance isn’t needed.”

“Okay, I will finish up on the cake and leave then.” I sit on a stool in the kitchen, waiting for the cake to be done baking. I watch him prepare everything he needs to make the evening meal. It seems like tonight we are having fish and rice.

 

It scares me a bit seeing him use a knife with such skill and precision as he slices the fish. I highly doubt he would ever need the skill for anything aside from cooking, but my imagination tries to frighten me. I try to think of something that doesn’t send chills up my spine.

 

The clock on the wall tells me it's about time to take out the cakes. I lay out a large cooling rack on the counter. I slip on oven mitts and take out each out the cakes. I remove each one from their pan and place them on the rack.

 

I take off the glove and start to gather the ingredients needed to make the icing. I make sure I avoid Reiji and give him his personal space as I walk around to retrieve my supplies.

 

“Reiji, where are all the familiars?” I ask gazing around the kitchen.

 

“They usually come out when we are at school or sleeping. I don’t seem them that often myself.”

 

“You don’t, then who’s in charge of them?” I thought that he would be the one controlling them, him being the person in charge of everything and all.

 

“That is Kanato’s responsibility, I just instruct him on what to tell them.” So he is still technology behind it all.

 

“Wow, so Kanato can summon familiar, that’s cool.”

 

“Ayato and Laito can also do this, but I don’t want them using it. They usually mix their foolish jokes with their work.”

 

I guess now is a good time to test my hypothesis. “ Do you vampires have any other abilities?”

 

“Have you heard the saying ‘curiosity killed the bitch’? Oh, I’m sorry,” he cocks his head to the side a bit, “it’s cat.”

 

I gulp and begin to whisk the ingredients until the become a thick icing. I don’t look Reiji in the eye, it is obvious I’ve ticked him off. I make sure to keep my thought about him and the knife in the ‘can possibly happen’ category of my mind.

 

I place the bowl in the refrigerator to cool as I cut the round tops off the cakes.  After a bit of searching, I find a decorating Lazy Suzy. I take the bowl of icing out of the fridge and bring the cake layers over to the island. I preside in icing the cake. I find the icing bags and tips and finish off with a border on the top and bottom of the cake.

 

I finish right as Reiji is done. So much for going outside before dinner. I throw everything in the sink and leave the kitchen. The table is already set, so I just sit down in a random spot on the side of the table. I’m the only one there for about a minute before Kanato enters, Teddy in hand. He comes over and sits to the left of me.

 

“Did you finish my cake?” he asks without a greeting.

 

“Yes, it's in the kitchen. We can eat it after dinner,” I reply.

 

“Are you assuming I’m going to share my cake with you or anyone else in this house?” he asks harshly.

 

“Oh, I’m sorry.”

 

The dining room is soon filled with the rest of the brothers. Laito walks in with a smirk and I mentally pray from him not to sit in the empty seat beside me. But, of course, there is no powerful beginning to pity me and the most perverted vampire of them all sits by me with a devilish smile. I roll my eyes as he smirks at me, and I become very tempted to move my chair away from him.

 

Shuu sits at the head of the table to my right. He gives me a slight nod of acknowledgment, and I reflect the action back. All the vampires are in the room, but Subaru. I notice that Yui is also a bit late. I smile to myself as I let my imagination drift to what could be keeping them.

 

They walk in as Reiji is placing the food on the table, my sister nearly stomping. Yui sits across the table from me, her brow frowned. He face is a bit pink, but not like she was embarrassed, more like just calming down from yelling. I look over at Subaru, his stone hard eyes stare down at me through his pearl white hair.

 

I shift uncomfortably in my chair, what’s his problem? We begin to eat in the now too predictable silence. The symphony of metal utensils on glass plates echoes off the walls like it always does. I look at Kanato, who is eating quite fast, probably trying to force down his food to be able to eat the cake sooner.

 

Although I don’t dare ask him, I desire a piece of the desert. It has been ages since I’ve last baked a cake, and I’m dying to have a portion of the sweet. The last cake I baked was the last peaceful summer at the Kei’s.

 

I think it was one of the best cakes I have ever eaten. I made it out of sheer boredom, that day I didn’t feel like doing much of anything. The cake was chocolate with an outstanding four layers. I blanketed it was a strawberry icing. I was so confined that the twins would love it, I served it after dinner that night.

 

Unfortunately, Kaname was never quite fond of chocolate cake. The comment took me back a little, and you could see my dejection from a mile away. I think I said something, can’t remember what, which made Natsume give me a stern look, but Kaname laughed.

 

He offered to take a piece because I made it, no other reason. He said it was the most delicious chocolate cake he has ever had, after taking a fork full. I’m was never sure, and still not, if he was lying to make me feel better or being truly honest. So there we were, us three eating the cake. I also remember Natsume and me using the leftover frosting later for...other things that night.

 

I smile to myself as I think about the past. I swallow hard to not only down my food but the lump I felt forming in my throat. I am about to excuse myself when Reiji announces for us to remain in the dining room. I wonder if he is going to give some kind of disciplinary lecture.

 

James comes out a moment later to collect our dishes from in front of us. The butler goes back into the kitchen, returning a heartbeat later with my cake glass Lazy Suzy and extra plates on the cart. He slices that cake and puts a piece on each of the plates. He then places a plate in front each of us.

 

I look to see Kanato, amethyst eyes flaring with anger. His personal sweet being taken from him by others. I take back my thoughts from earlier, he can have his cake, just please don’t go crazy.

 

“Ooh, a cake,” Laito coos next to me. “What’s the occasion?”

 

“Yous Truly is gracing you with my presence,” Ayato says with an arrogant smile. “That is enough of a reason to celebrate.”

 

“There is no occasion,” Reiji says. “Hikari decided to bake a cake, a very large cake. I highly doubt it would be consumed before it goes bad. The last thing I want is rotten food in my kitchen.”

 

I chuckle a bit inside as he refer to the room as ‘his kitchen’.

 

Yui looks at me, questioning me with her eye, identical to mine. ‘Why did you made a cake?” they seem to act.

 

I tilt my head towards the violet haired vampire and mouth, “Kanato ask from one.”

 

She nods in understanding. She looks down at the cake that was placed in front of her. She smiles at it and then at me. ‘Good jobs looks tasty,” her smile says.

 

“I will eat anything Whore-chan makes,” Laito says. Ayato snickers at the nickname and I groan. The Fedora wearing vampire takes the fork and cuts off a piece of the cake. He eats it and looks as if he just melted. “It delicious.” He sounds surprised as if he thought it would taste bad. I don't see why, he had my macaroons before.

 

One by one, everyone samples the cake, everyone except Shuu. I look at my cake and back at the eldest brother. Does he not like cake? A serious deja vu washes over me.  I shake my head and take some cake into my own mouth. The cake is rich, icing sweet, yet not too much. I feel my cheek tingle at the sweetness.

 

I look back over to Shuu, fork in his mouth. I smile at him slightly and place another bite in my own mouth. I see his mouth twitch a bit as if fighting a smile.

 

A sudden urge to make the vampire smile washes over me. I put the fork in the front of my lips. I then use my muscles to make the fork handle point up and then fall back down. It is a bit hard, especially since I’m fighting a smile of my own. I don’t break eye contact with Shuu, searching for a reaction. He seems to fight a cough and place his hand over his mouth, obviously trying to disguise a laugh or at least a smile. And for this short time, it's only us two. Shuu Sakamaki and Hikari Komori. Him and me.

 

But our world is shattered when Reiji calls for my attention with an ‘ahem’. I look over to him, fork still in my mouth. I look over to him, his eyebrow raised in annoyances and Ayato chuckles next to him. I pull the utensil from my mouth, utterly embarrassed. I stuff a large fraction of my desert into my mouth.

 

“Whore-chan,” Laito coos beside me.

 

I swallow and turn to him, “Hm?”

 

Surprising me, he lean in close to me and licks the corner of my mouth. I jerk my head away from the vampire.

 

“Laito,” Reiji says sternly, staring at his half-brother.

 

“What?” he says innocently. “She had some icing on her cheek and it was bothering me.”

 

I glare at Laito with disgust and wipe the area he licked with the back of my hand. I take my napkin and wipe my whole mouth, not giving the vampire another reason to try and pull stupid crap like that again.

 

I finish my cake and excuse myself from the table. I go to my room  and close the door. That one action from Laito seemed to have really ruined my night. But seeing Shuu fight a smile, a smile I was behind, makes my heart flutter. I sigh in happiness.

 

But my thought goes back to before. Do I really want to fall for Shuu? I don't think that it will be for the best, I honestly don’t want to be in love. It is fun being with him, but I know that it can only hurt me in the end. Maybe us both.

 

Even though I did have fun, my plans were completely ruined I could have gone outside right after dinner, but we had to have desert. If I try to go now, I’m surely going to get caught.

 

I know there is more to this property than I have seen, and I’m determined to found out what other interesting things are on this land.

 

I was also going to scan the perimeter, search for a way out. I have no plans on leaving here, well, not now. I just want to if thing gets bad. Even though today was fine, I don’t question the idea of everything going straight to hell again.

 

 


	23. Hypocrite

 

Yui's POV

I sit on my bed eyeing that door. I stare at it intensely, as if my gaze alone will make it open and Subaru will be behind it. Unlike the vampire, I don't have any supernatural abilities.

 

He said he'll talk to me once we got back from school, but it's been four and a half hours since we got back. I'm starting to think that he is the one trying to run away, and action he accused me of trying to accomplish yesterday.

 

I bury my face into my pillow as if it can bury away my memories of yesterday with it.

 

* * *

 

The window of the limo is rolled all the way down, something that rarely happens. The brothers always keep the tinted glass up as we drive to school, but that rule doesn't apply when most of the are gone. I keep my face by the opening, letting the autumn air blow over my face, whipping my hair in every direction. I breath in coldness, allowing it to cool my lungs.

 

"You're going to catch a cold if you keep that up," Subaru says from across the vehicle. He turned his head from looking out his closed window to facing me. His arms, like usual, as crossed over his chest.

 

I smile at his sweet advice, knowing he cares for me. I roll the window up half way, and I look over to him.

 

"Thanks for coming out with me."

 

"Tsk, if it wasn't for me, you wouldn't be leaving the manor," he says harshly, but I have learned a while ago that he may be rude, but he has the right intentions. He tilts his head to gaze out the window once more. "We're almost there. Don't be stupid, and don't give me a reason to regret leaving my room."

 

I nod my head, joy and excitement bubbling inside me. I have only left the estate about two or three times, of course not including school. Leaving does feel good after only going between two places all the time. And the thought of it just being Subaru and me makes it all the more better.

 

"What are you so nervous about?" the vampire says bluntly.

 

"Hm?" I hum in confusion.

 

"You drumming your damn fingers again." He nods his head to my right hand. Sure enough, my fingers were drumming over my leg, an unconscious habit that I bet I was born with. I lay them flat across my brown shorts.

 

"Nothing, just... nothing," I reply. He raises his eyebrow at me in suspicion, and I turn to look out the window once more. I feel the limo jerk in a stop. Knowing we've reached our distinction, I

close my window.

 

"Go to the door, I'll be there in a moment," he says. "Don't you dare move either." He gives me a sharp glance.

 

"I won't," I confirm.

I step out the vehicle, letting the night air fully wash over me. I take in a deep breath and make my way to towards the doors of the mall. The sun is low, yet it hasn't set yet. I know that Subaru isn't going to step out the vehicle with the glowing orb still in the sky. They never told me exactly what happens when they come in contact with the heated rays.

 

I know better than to try and run, besides, I don't want to. I know it's quite bothersome to stay at the mansion with all of the vampires, but it is something that I have grown accustomed to the day to day life. I won’t dare leave Hikari there by herself either. Besides, there isn't any place for me to go. If I show my face at the Church, they'll probably send me right back to the manor.

 

I make my way inside and stay by the door, waiting for the vampire. I look around the shopping plaza. I'm in the food court right now, surrounded by dozens of people. A mother trying to herd her runny children, friends hanging out after school, workers handing out samples to passing pedestrians. The whole area is buzzing with life, no a moment to spare in their busy lives.

 

"So where are we going?" Subaru ask from behind me. I have gotten used to them popping up on

me, so he just barely surprises me.

 

"To the fabric store and the home supplies one," I say, retrieving my list from my short's pocket. I read over it, making sure I memorize what's on it. I begin to make my way through the crowd, Subaru right by my side.

 

I can almost feel him with me, even with the others flowing around me. His presence is like a warm embrace I can almost sense.

 

I look back at him a few times. He's hands of swallowed by his pockets, the same place he always puts them if they aren't already across his chest. He's in full alert, eyeing our surroundings, as if searching for a threat. He looks like a lion hunting for his prey. But with the scowl on his face, I doubt anyone would come near him.

 

He catches my stare and I quickly look down at my feet, bad idea. I bump into someone, causing me to trip. Losing my balance, I feel myself fall to the ground. Before I can make contact with the marble floor and properly leave a mark on my face, two strong arms wrap around me. They lift me up back onto my own to feet.

 

"Watch where you goin'," Subaru hisses. I nod and barely mutter out a 'thank you'. His arms stay on my waist a bit longer than they should have. He quickly notices the lingering contact and releases my me. "Let's hurry up and go to that damn fabric store or what."

 

I nod once more, and we make our way to the shop. I make sure to keep my face up and look straight ahead. I don't dare look back. Partly because I don't want to bump into any anyone else, but many so the vampire won't see the rosiness of my cheeks.

 

We make it to the store and I start scanning the racks upon racks of fabrics. I have to find a specific color scheme one for my project in art. My group got stuck with the clothing category, and know we have to make certain types of clothing. I didn't have any old shirts I could use for my part, and I was certainly not going to ask Hikari for something. Now I'm force to buy something.

 

I look over the fabric, trying to find something to my liking. I look over at the vampire, who is leaning against the bare wall, staring at me. I try not to care and continue on my own search.

I feel a weird tension between the two of us. It usually isn't like this, at school it feels a lot less awkward. Maybe it's partly that he's giving anyone that come in a two meter radius of us a death glare.

 

I sigh with frustration, this isn't going very well. Of course, I wasn't planning on this being a date or a cliche trip to the mall with a lover. I didn't think that it would this annoying to Subaru. I thought he would also like being out of the manor for some time.

 

"What are you even looking for?" he ask with an exasperated sigh.

 

"Oh, I'm looking for something oceany or something like that. Anything that has to do with water, a nice, ocean blue, maybe with some kind of pattern," I try to explain my chaperon.

He pushes himself off the wall and join me in my pursuit. We scan the walls, looking for anything that fit the quota.

My eyes leave the cloths and journey to the vampire. He searches the shelf, determent to find whatever I need. Simple things like this make me so happy. He may be trying to hurry up and get us out, but his offer to help is kind. I smile, and I feel the chains of awkwardness crumble.

 

There is just something truly wonderful about him, yet I don't know what it is. He will always listen, even if I'm a bit bothersome. He gives me honest answers and wise advice, even if it's brutally honest. He always give me a mix of what I need and want to hear. I feel as if I could truly be open with me, and I only hope he feels the same towards me. I like to think that he does care about me, even if he doesn't show it in the kindest ways all the time.

 

"What about this?" he says handing me a sample piece of cloth. It is a sapphire color blue, very bright and lively. There are white dashed swirls marking the cloth, giving it an almost wave like pattern.

 

I smile at the cloth in my hand and then at Subaru. "This is perfect!" I exclaim, a bit too happy. He shrugs and I think I can see the faintest hint of a smile on his lips. I've only seen him smile once. It was almost a shocking sight, and it took my breath away. I don't even know if I will see it again. Every day when we sit in the courtyard together, I try to say or do something funny. I try so hard, determined that I will do something to make his lips turn up, even in the slightest.

 

We get an employee to measure out the cloth and cut the proper length. Since it was a fabric store, there were plenty of needles, something else I had on my list. Subaru pays for the items with the money Reiji gave him and we leave the store.

 

We walk in the crowded area once more. I tempted to ask if we can just walk around, something that I'm aching to do. I look over to Subaru, trying to read his actions and expressions to figure out his current attitude.

 

Any person would give Subaru a simple glance and immediately say that he is pissed, but that isn't always the case. It's just the facade he repeatedly puts on, one that I have almost always seen straight through.

 

His shoulder are a bit hunched, less tense with anticipation. He eye no longer dart around for a threat, but they still constantly, yet calmly, take in his surroundings. His face is eased also, no longer scowling, although a frown is still present.

 

"Can we go in there?" I ask, pointing to a random clothing store. He follows my finger to the shop.

 

"Why do you need to go in there?" he says, a hint of annoyance weighing in his words.

 

"I need to get something," I lie with a bit of hesitation. He sighs and begin to walk in the direction of the clothing department. I smile with glee, the small triumph making me a tad bit happier.

I follow him and I walk into the female side of the store. He looks around the nearly empty store. There are a few other teenage girls and a boy and his dad looking at t-shirt.

 

He stays by me as I look through the racks of clothing, just shuffling through them. There's nothing, in particular, I need here, but I don't think it would hurt to get a new shirt or two. I only have about six house shirts, so I doubt it's a crime to pick up a few up. Besides it's also getting colder, so am going to need a jacket. I should also get something for Hikari.

 

I pull out a long sleeve, red shirt with a black bow. I hold it out in front of me and turn to Subaru. "How's this?" I ask.

He looks at the clothing in front of me. "It's fine I guess," he says simply. I smile and lay it over my arm, I guess it's a keeper. I look at the shirt and then at Subaru. I notice that it's the same shade of red as his eyes. I smile and begin to search for a sapphire blue top for my sister. I we should be about the same size, maybe she is a bit bigger. Well, she is a bit.. bigger.

 

By the end, I have two new shirts and a jacket for each of us. The whole time, I was asking the snow white haired vampire what he thought about each article of clothing.

Surprisingly, he was actually giving me commentary on each clothing piece I presented to him, instead of just saying, 'that okay' or 'I guess it's fine'.

 

He tells me to stay away from light colors because they're easily stained. And I know the unsaid words he's thinking, that blood does stain badly. I do have a ruined shirt, the left sleeve stained with red spots I could never scrub off.

 

I hand him the clothing so he can purchase them. He goes to the short line constants of the other buyers at the back of the store. I stand behind Subaru, waiting in line alongside him.

I hear soft music playing and I turn around. Outside of the store, there is a music shop. A song plays from across the plaza. My promise to Hikari about a CD player floods into my head.

 

Not giving it a second thought, I leave the line and make my way outside of the store. I snake my way through the crowd, dodging the other shoppers.

 

I make it to the music shop and enter it. The song is much louder in here, the sound booming through the speakers in the back of the store. I scan the walls, looking at all of the CD's and accessories. Headphone, earbuds, speakers, and so much more. I love the feeling of the lively store.

 

I locate the CD players with the rest of CD's. Surprisingly, there are many different types to get. I look through them, not sure which to select. They are just large, metal, circular boxes, yet feel as if I need a certain one to make Hikari happy.

 

"Need help with somethin'?" someone ask. I turn to see an employee by my side. He has wild, blue hair and more ear piercing than the delinquent boy in my class. He smile is probably one he gives every clueless person that walks through the door, yet it's still warm and friendly.

 

"Oh, I um.. I was just looking for a CD player," I reply softly.

 

"Well, they're right... hmmmm," he says tapping his finger on his chin playfully. "Ah, I remember. I believe they right there." He points to the already discovered display of music players. He laughs like he just told the funniest joke and I smile along.

 

"I'm just teasing," he says with a wink. "But seriously, is there a specific one ya lookin' for?"

I shrug at him. He looks at the devices and picks up a plain silver one. He turns it on and the buttons glow orange.

 

"Then I suggest this one. This brand's much lighter in weight than the others, more portable."

 

"Oh, thank you," I say, taking the offered machine. He smiles at me and turns to the CD's on the shelf.

 

"If you like, I can also show you some really awesome songs."

 

"That would be nice."

 

"Any preferred genre of music?"

 

"Classical," I reply, remembering Hikari's skilled piano playing.

 

"Classical, huh. Not many teens are into it these days, mostly old people." He looks away from the shelf and back at me. "There's nothing around with it, though," he says, just in case I took offense.

I shrug in response. "I'm not a big fan either, it's for my sister."

 

"That's sweet. She's lucky to have a cu-"

 

"Yui!" a familiar voice calls out. I look behind the employee and see a very frustrated Subaru in the doorway of the store.

 

The music is no longer audible in the store, nothing is. Everything seems to blur into nonexistence, everything but him. Fury is written all over his face in large, bold letters. He breathing heavily, knuckles whiter than usual. It feels as if I was frozen in time, the only thing move is his heaving chest and my pounding heart.

 

Realization washes over me in an instantly. At that moment I feel a stone, no, a boulder in my stomach. The guilt surges throughout my body. His blood red eyes piercing into my heart.

 

What did I just do?

 

* * *

 

I groan into my pillow once more, remembering how stupid I acted yesterday. The sound of my frustration is muted by the pillow.

 

"Done with you little tantrum?" I hear a voice ask. More specifically, the voice of a certain vampire I've been wanting and dreading to talk to. I stiffen as I realize Subaru was here, and I wonder how long he has been there.

 

I slowly lift my face from the pillow and look at the vampire. The first words he's spoken to me in over twenty-four years ooze with his usual sarcasm.

 

"Oh, you're here," I say softly. He leans against the wall, arms crossed over his chest. I look him over, trying to see if he's frustrated or annoyed. Nope, just his usual self.

 

"You're the one that wanted to talk, so stop gawking at me and speak."

 

"Sorry. I just want to talk about what happened yesterday." He sighs, now he's annoyed.

 

"There's nothing left to talk about," he hisses."We already went over this yesterday."

 

"No, we didn't. You scolded me half way through the ride and didn't let me speak a word. I got one sentence in before we got home and you left. You completely avoid me for the rest of the day and wasn't at the usual spot today at school during lunch," I counter.

 

"Then what is it that you want to say? What, that you're sorry, that this is just a misunderstanding?"

 

"Yes!" I exclaim, now on my feet. Even though he them, he looks as if he doesn't believe his own words. "Like I was trying to explain, it was accident. I just wasn't thinking."

 

"Well, maybe you need to do more thinking and less talking. You seemed very talkative with that employee in the music shop," he snaps in frustration, pushing myself from off the wall.

 

"He was doing his job," I groan. "It was just across the plaza, it's not like I left the general area. Like I'm trying to say, I wasn't trying to run away." The pain is back from the when we were riding back to the manor.

 

"I just can't believe you, Yui," the vampire snaps in frustration. "You drag me around the mall, wasting my time. Then you try to buy the whole entire store. Once you have me busy waiting in line, you try to leave. I don't get you, and I'm sure as hell you don't know how the fuck I was feeling. The last thing I need is Reiji kill me because you want to be damn rebellious and run the fuck away!"

 

"Then why the hell didn't you wait? It would have taken one minute for me to buy the damn clothing you wanted. No, you're going to go and run off."

 

I can feel the pain of regret and guilt creep up. The worse is distrust. The fact that he doesn't trust me when I say that I really wasn't trying to leave. That I was just going over there to find something for Hikari.

 

"I'm sorry," I say, but it doesn't sound sincere even though it is. The frustration is boiling over and I feel as if the steam is coming out of my ears. "Subaru, I don't think you understand. I don't want to leave. I'm fine living here. I know I have tried to leave before, and because of that I know it isn't possible. You really think I want to leave you, leave Hikari?" My words are somewhere between a plea and argument.

 

I see him clench his fist tight, so tight I expect to see blood drip down his knuckles. He's red eyes are flaring with anger. "There is something wrong with both of you when it comes to fucking communication. Is is really that hard to say one sentence, are you really that stupid?"

 

The question stabs at my heart. He has never insulted me with such anger and I doubt it was a joke like other times. Wait, he said the both of us, is he talking about Hikari?

 

"What does Hikari have to do with this?" I say sharply.

 

"You're the one that brought her the hell up," he says gesturing his hand to me.

 

My frustration leaves me when he speaks of my sister. I completely forgot about the current argument and think about what he just said. I didn't mean to bring her into this, but now I'm suspicious. Does he know something I don't?

 

"Subaru, do you know something?" I ask narrowing my eyes.

 

"That is fuckin' relevant," he snaps.

 

"No, Subaru. What do you know? Tell me." My voice isn't demanding but filled with curiosity and concern.

 

"Yui, I don't give a fuck about your sister. She has no-"

 

"But I do! Subaru, You don't understand, I don't care about any of that crap from yesterday anymore, I will totally forget, just tell me what you know. Hikari is more important than this misunderstanding." The statement takes him my surprise and he loses the tension in his body with a sigh.

 

"Obviously you two have some kind of miscommunication problem. At first I thought it was on her, but after what happened yesterday," he shoots me a dirty look, "I think it's on both of you. Hikari asked me to keep this from you, but I never promise anything to anyone. She said that she was seeing Shuu at school during lunch, much like us."

 

I narrow my eyes at him. "Yeah I know this," I say a bit confused, what is he going at?

 

"That's it, nothing more." He says with a shrug.

 

I toss the around in my head a little, trying to pick it apart. Subaru knew about the music room, so what of it? My narrowed eyes expand with shock. "How long did you know about his?" I ask demandingly.

 

"Since Thursday," he says calmly.

 

Thursday. I try to recall the events of the day. It was the day Hikari came into my room and she started to question me about the vampires. Then Subaru came in…

 

"What did you guys talk about when I left?" I says, feeling hurt inside, hoping the thought eating away at my brain isn't true.

 

Subaru groans in annoyance. "Yui, this isn't what you called me in-"

 

"God dammit Subaru," I say, cursing for the second time in a week, something I rarely do. "Can you please just drop that, just tell me what happened. Please."

 

He looks away as if he can't look me in the eyes when he explain. "I confronted her. I knew she was hiding something, and I was... I don't know. She just seems as if she knew something or was doing something behind your backs." He said your, was he thinking about me when this happened? "I told her to tell me what was happening or I'll tell you about my suspicion. She told me about the music room."

 

I stare baffled at Subaru. He knew! He knew she was hiding something from me, and he didn't even bother to tell me it. Why was he was hiding this from me?

 

"Yui, listen to me," he says as if he was concerned about my sudden speechless shock. Now he's doing the explaining. "I asked her how she felt about you like I did with you the next day. When I ask her, she seemed broken. He eyes were watering and everything like she was going to fucking cry over a sentence. She started saying she was sorry, it took me a moment to figure out what the hell she was talking about. She looked truly hurt about not tell you. She kept saying that she loves you and she doesn't know how to tell you. Then she started to cry, she start to cry like a damn baby, too. She became a broken mess because a simple question. Like you were when I asked you the same thing. I told her to tell you, and told her she has to tell you. She nodded and continued to say she would. I guess she did because you already know."

 

I just stand there, try to catch on to what exactly I just heard and how to take it in. Subaru was hiding this for me from me, which hurts. He kept this to himself, no better than Hikari.

But what he said, is it true? She was truly regretful about the music room fiasco? I have long forgiving her, but this only makes me feel worse. She never told me she was going to tell me, but how Subaru makes it sound, she was planning to. And that she kept saying she loved me over and over, not able to suppress her guilt.

 

I have no idea how to respond to any of this. I can barely make out a simple word to the vampire. "Leave," I say weakly. He doesn't question me and leaves my room. I sit on my bed, head in hands. I don't know what or how I should be feeling towards this person, this vampire.

 

I feel distrusting, knowing that he didn't tell me something that was pretty important. Yeah Subaru, I did learn about the music room. But it's not what you're thinking about. It wasn't brought up in some conversation. No, far from it.

 

I'm also frustrated with him. He does all of this behind my own back, making him a hypocrite above them all. He also doesn't trust me either, if I go back to the original reason for asking him to come here.

 

Yet, these negative emotions can't plague the part of my heart that has fallen for him. I try to calm myself before leaving my room to go to the dining room. I know if I take too long that I'm going to regret it.

 

I go to the bathroom, splash the water on my face as if I can wash away my mess of emotions. I leave my room and make it to the dining room before the last plate was set on the table.

 

I sit across from Hikari, who smiles at me. She then begins to study my face. I look down, not want her to find the emotions I'm trying to hide. Should I be mad at her for not tell me that Subaru knew all of this? That he knew about the secret before me?

 

I don't eat much, instead I move the food around on my plate, only eating a small portion of the meal. But then a memory comes floating into my mind, like a ghost that has come back to remind me of the events of the past. This weekend, when we were at the lake, we were talking about Subaru.

 

I realize that the moment before Ayato wandered over to us, disturbing our conversation, she was going to tell me. She was going to tell me what her and Subaru discussed days prior. The sinking feeling comes back over me.

 

How could I think so badly about her? She is the one who was trying to be open, she's trying to change. She's telling me what she does, making sure we don't have any miscommunication. Yet I am the one still hiding things from her. I still have the secret of the deal between me and Laito locked away.

 

Now I'm the hypocrite. I want to drown in my own guilt, and I bet it's possible. Even now, am thinking about Hikari, I completely dismissed Subaru. I completely discarded our conversation to deal with my sister and my own problem instead of resolve the conflict between the vampire and me. What is wrong with me?

 

My thoughts are interrupted by Reiji announcing that he wants us to stay a bit longer, which I'm dreading. All I want to do right now is go to my room and pray that I can resolve all of his before it can plunge deeper into troubling territory.

 

After collecting my almost full plate, another is placed in front of me, a chocolate cake on it. Reiji says that Hikari made it and my face immediately lifts up to see her. We have a conversation that only we could probably understand.

 

I eat the dessert, the delicious sweet aiding my bitter mood. I almost moan at the sheer goodness of the cake and I look at Hikari to congratulate her, but she isn't looking my way.

She is staring at Shuu, and then back down at the cake. She takes a piece and glance back and the eldest vampire.

 

I see something change within her and notice she has some kind of determined look on her face. A moment later she's playing with her fork, looking directly at Shuu. The tension that hasn't left my already complete leaves me as a inspect my sister's silliness.

 

She looks… happy. The same kind of smile she had when she was in the music room. Even after all the trouble she has been going through, she's still enjoying herself. She has been through way may than me, yet she smiles now like there isn't going to be a later.

 

I look over to see that I am not the only one watching the foolery. Laito stares at Hikari, but not with amusement. He looks, upset, a bit serious, rare for the perverted vampire. The look on his face makes him look different. His eyes go from this half brother and then back to Hikari. It takes me a moment finally figure out what he looks like, he looks jealous.

 

But that can't be right. Laito can't be jealous over something like this, what is there to be jealous of? I see him catch my gaze and he loses his expression, smiling. And I've seen this smile before, his scheming smile.

 

Reiji tells my sister to knock it out and she does so by shoving a large piece of cake in her mouth. Icing is then smeared on her cheek, and I see the corner of Laito's mouth twitch. He easily tricks Hikari into moving her head, which he takes the moment to lick her face.

 

I roll my eyes at his stupidly perverted action. Hikari reacts to his liking and he smirks at his victory.

Hikari is the first to finish her cake and excuse herself. The rest of the vampires soon follow, all but Shuu. I look over at him, wonder why he's still here. He is missing with the cake, much like I did with my dinner, staring at it with a bored expression.

 

"Don't like her cake?" The words leave my mouth before I can stop them. His head snaps up as if just realizing I'm still here.

 

He slouches in his with a sigh. "I'm not very fond of sweets," he says casually. Although he just stated he doesn't like the dessert, he moves the fork to his mouth and licks the frosting from it.

 

"I see," I say. I look the vampire over. Does Hikari really like him? No offense to him, but he just seems so… boring. he doesn't speak much and he sleeps all day. What could she possibly see in him?

 

Well, I have no room to talk, I've fallen for a hot head. A hot head with a few problems and has a weird sense of kinds. But he is still my hot head. Oh god, Yui, listen to yourself.

 

Maybe it's the same with Shuu, there is something about the orange haired vampire that only Hikari sees. Some kind of magnetic forces that she can't help but be pulled to. It could be his talent with the piano she loves. I remember the way she look as he played, completely awed by his skills. No, it's something much deeper than that.

 

"Have you two worked things out?" Shuu asks, bringing me back to reality.

 

"'Worked things out'? What do yo- oh that," I say as I figure out he's mentioning. I completely forgot he was there during the whole thing. "Yeah, yeah, we sorted everything out. It was really nothing, I just overreacted." I let out an embarrassed laugh. "In the words of Subaru, 'you two have some kind of miscommunication problem'. But, in all honestly, I think we are both okay and are over the matter."

 

"Good to know." He closes his eyes and leans his head back in the chair.

 

"Is she enjoying hers? You know, being in there with you every day?"

 

He's still for a moment as if his breathing was preventing him for hearing me properly. He voice is low and somewhat happy, an emotion I have yet to see him display. "Yeah, I think she is."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooooooo, what do you dear readers think? I finally gave Yui and Subaru's 'relationship' some real depth.
> 
> Tell me if you like the idea of seeing the same thing through different point of views. Honestly, that Shuu and Yui moment at the end was totally not planned. I typed it up on a whim when I was in the middle of eating cookies with my brother. He asked me if my friend and I cleared up a huge misunderstanding that was caused us to have a mini cold war. I love real world inspiration.
> 
> Leave a comment if you enjoyed or if you didn't. I accept criticism and suggestions.


	24. Smile

Hikari’s POV

 

Dejected. That is the word I would use to describe Yui today. That, or really deep in thought. She hasn't said much all day, and when she does, it's momentary. She seems almost detached from reality as if she's in her own silent world.

 

I have a feeling it has something to do with Subaru. They sat on opposite sides of the table during breakfast and as far apart as they can get from each other during the car ride. Whatever is going on between them is the result of the reason why they looked so upset during dinner.

 

I don't want to meddle with things that don't concern me, but I don't like seeing Yui like this. I know that after all this time of her making sure I'm alright, it's about time for me to reflect the action.  

 

I don't know what she may say or do, so I don't bring any of this up during school. Instead, I make sure I watch over her, like if I look away for a moment, the ghost of depression would take my sister far away.

 

I am going to start helping with this predicament immediately, beginning with the others in  factor of this equation of depression.

 

Like yesterday, the history lesson finishes early and we have free time. I ask the teacher if I can go back to the library. She gives me a questioning eyebrow raise. She is probably wondering why I'm going to the same place two days in a row.

 

I 'explain' to her that there was a book I needed and that it was out yesterday. I also say that it is really important for my 'types of art' project in my art class. She seems to accept the excuse and excuses me. Thankfully, Ayato doesn't find it necessary to follow me today.

 

I make my way to the courtyards, eyes searching for Subaru. It isn't hard to spot that vampire, his white hair and isolation serving as a beacon. He sits on the wall of a small flight of stairs that lead to the outside walkway. He is reading a book of some sort.

 

I look around and notice that most of the other students are ignoring Subaru. No, more like completely avoiding him. I shrug it off and walk over to him.

 

"Hey, Subaru," I say as I get close to him. His head lifts up to look at me. His stone hard expression he always fashions doesn't change as he locks eyes with me.

 

"Wassup, Hikari?" he says bitterly. I cringe by the way he says my name as if he's pissed off at me.

 

"Nothing much, I just wanted to know if you're okay." I sit down next to him, not too close, though.

 

"Ha, you sound like Yui," he says with an exasperated sigh.

 

"I know," I reply softly. "You two just seemed... well, there seems to be some kind of tension between guys."

 

"That's none if your business." The vampire's tongue is quick and harsh.

 

"Yeah, kind of rude of me, but I was never good at leaving Yui when she's in a fight, whether it's physical or internal."

 

"I don't see how, you seem to be the one hurting her."

 

His words take me by surprise and I'm left speechless. I know that I haven't been the best sister or person, in general, but I'm trying to fix the damage that I've caused.

 

"I'm not denying that I've hurt her," I say strongly. "And you've seen how much that fact itself pain me. That is why I'm trying to become a better person. To do that, I'm going to stick to Yui's side and be the best I can. When she falls I'm going to be the one to pick her back up."

 

I glance sharply at Subaru. "So I want to know if something happened yesterday. Scratch that, I want to know what happened the other day."

 

"I don't have to tell you shit," the vampire spits. His jaw is clenched, a sign that signals I've pissed him off.

 

I weigh my two options to respond to this: argue right back or let it go.

 

If I argue, then I risk the chance of really pissing him off even more. I don't know what Subaru is like we he gets mad, and I'm not quite sure if I'm ready to that side of him. If I do continue to pester, I also put the little liking he has towards me in the toilet. That is something I can't risk.

 

If I do apologize, I may just end up giving in, which I don't want to do. I'm doing this for Yui and I don't want to do some half-ass job.

 

"Okay then," I say, slapping my hands on my knees. "I will stop pestering you about this for now, but I'm not completely dropping it." I lift my chin a bit, showing that I'm not backing down. "As an apology, you can ask me anything and I'll answer truthfully." I cross my arms over my chest, waiting for Subaru to take advantage at the opportunity.

 

He grunts in response. "Whatever," he says annoyed. He doesn't say or ask anything after that.

 

"You're not going to ask anything?" I say softly.

 

"I really don't care about you," he says bluntly. "If you insist, how did you tell Yui about the music room?"

 

It doesn't surprise me that he's question is about Yui. I won't deny that I am slightly shocked he is bringing back up the music room, though.

 

He did mess me up that day. His words were so serious and stern, it was scary. Yet, he sounded so concerned and soft when he spoke of Yui. He sounded like he really cared when he was explaining how hurt Yui was going to be if I kept lying to her. It's strange when I remember that Yui and I are both older than him. This short tempered vampire can be quite wise at times.

 

"She kind of caught me in the act the day after we talked," I say. He seems surprised by the statement, and the shock soon turns to rage.

 

"You said you'd tell her about it," Subaru says sharply.

 

"I was," I say putting my hands up in defense. "I swear, I was planning on telling her on the weekend, things just didn't work that way. We talk about it and everything on the matter is cleared up."

 

He looks away from me with a suck of his teeth. He looks upset about the fact.

 

"Wait a second," I say in realization. "How do you know I told her?"

 

"Just get the fuck away," he grumbles under his breath. I don't need to be told twice and I get up. I do feel as if I'm not ending this well.

 

I stand beside him and place my hand on his shoulder. Last last week, he doesn't shrug off the contact. "Sorry if I'm bothering you," I say quietly. "But if you want to talk, I will return the favor of listening."

 

With that, I leave the vampire and head to the library. I smile to myself, knowing that was a better way of leaving things than just getting up and walking away.

 

When I get to the library, I go straight to the art selection. I pick up a random book about art history. It's best to have the evidence that I went to the library to make sure my teacher doesn't start questioning me.

 

When leaving the area, I spot the book display. There are several different genres on display, but one perks my interest, Vampires, Werewolves, and other Supernaturals.  

 

I pick up that book and open it. Flipping through it, I realize and large fraction of the book is dedicated to the blood sucking creatures. I’m barely paying attention to the blurred words when one in particular takes hold of my attention. I stop and flip back to the page where I saw the word. I then look over the sentence.

 

“This monster’s saliva has the ability to heal wounds and minor injuries.” This sentence takes me by surprise, it's true. Today I woke up and my gashes were completely gone. So I guessed I was right yesterday, good job Hikari.

 

That is probably the only truthful thing about vampires in the whole book. Even though I know most of it is rubbish, I decide to get it.

 

I walk back to history class with the intention of reading through the Supernaturals book, but I drop the thought. If any of the vampires or Yui saw me reading this, they'd think I'm completely stupid. To make sure Ayato doesn't see it when I get back to class, I place the art book in front of it, shielding the book from anyone.

 

I get to class and slide my books into my bag. I look over at Ayato, who stares back at me with a blank expression. I don’t know if he’s mentally recording my actions or just looking at me to aggravate me, but I dismiss his gaze from my train of thought. I get out my novel and continue reading.

 

The chime rings a few minutes later and I leave the room like the rest of the students. I scan the crowd of students, searching for the vampire, but he’s nowhere to be seen. I don’t know if I’m being paranoid, but I feel as if he’s going to follow me like he did yesterday. And is he does, he’s going to see me go right past the detention room.

 

I eye through the herd of students before making my way to the music room. While seeking for Ayato, I spot Shiro talking to the blonde boy and glasses girl, I think her name is Mei. I should apologize for the way I acted earlier this week. Just leaving her there under the tree, properly thermally confused, was pretty awful.

 

I walk over to the trio swiftly. Mei, who is facing towards me, is the first to notice me approaching. She taps Shiro, who’s back is facing me and points in my direction. Shiro stops talking and turns to see me. She looks a bit uneasy when our eyes meet.

 

“Hey, Shiro,” I say with a half smile and the raise of my hand. The blond boy is the last to notice me and he reflects my smile.

 

“Oh,” she says, a bit insecurely. “Hello, Hikari.” Both of her friends give her a questioning glance, hearing her address me with my first name taking them both by surprise.

 

“Sorry to interrupt,” I say, looking at Shiro’s companions, “but may I steal a moment of Shiro’s time?” They look at one another and nod, although neither of them moves. I don’t mind them staying, although it's rude to linger when two are having a conversation.

 

“What is it, Hikari?” she ask quietly but curiously.

 

“I want to apologize for earlier this week,” I say. “Sorry for the way I acted and ditching you.” I bow slightly to her.

 

“No, no,” she says, waving her hands frantically. “It's totally fine. I was sticking my nose into things that didn’t consume me.” She bows slightly back at me. “Sorry for that.”

 

She raises and we look each other in the eye for a moment. Suddenly, I break into smile and laugh softly. I don’t know, but I have a feeling of happiness in my stomach that can only be let out with that small laugh.

 

She seems to be feeling the same because she breaks into a large smile.

 

“Well, then,” I say. “I will let you guys continue your previous conversation." Mei looks from me to Shiro, trying to piece together a puzzle she doesn’t even have the parts to. Shiro nods and I take a step back. “Maybe we can have lunch together sometime. Until then, see you later,” I say before turning around and making my way to down the hall.

 

I look back to see Mei mouth moving fast and hands gesturing towards me, probably trying to get the information out of her cousin. Blondie looks straight at me questioningly, trying to figure out what just happened.

 

I arrive at the music room as the chimes ring out through the halls. I take in a breath, hold it for a second, and release it with the rest of the tension that was in my body. I open the door to the music room, my favorite place in this whole school.

 

I look in and Shuu is on the piano bench, lying down as if it's a couch. I roll my eyes, wondering why he doesn’t just sleep on the sofa at the back of the room. I walk over to the vampire and lower myself so my knees are to my chest.

 

“Shuu,” I say, elongating his name. He doesn’t respond in any way. “Shuu,” I say, quickly this time, rushing it out so fast it sounds like am simply blowing air.

 

Nothing.

 

Not wanting to touch him for some odd reason, I repeatedly call out his name. I then test out how many different ways I can say his name. I squeak it out in a high pitch voice, grumble it out in the deepest base I can say. I even sing it out softly.

 

He never responds to any of my attempts. I cock my head to the side, is he ignoring me? His arm is over his eyes like usual, so I can’t tell if they're open. He isn’t even smiling slightly. I doubt he’s sleeping, so he must be ignoring.

 

I tap my finger on my chin, trying to think of anything else I can say, trying to continue this little game. An idea pops into my head. I toss it in my head a bit, trying to figure out if it may work. Nothing given, no gained, I guess.

 

I lean in into his ear and whisper, “Shuu-sama.” He eyebrows raise and he slowly lowers his arm from his face. I smile, my mission was finally achieved.

 

He turns so we’re face to face, noses an inch apart. I feel my face redden a bit as his large, sapphire eyes look straight into my own rose pink ones.

 

“Must you bother me when I try to rest?” he says, although I have a feeling that he isn't serious. Well, maybe not completely serious.

 

“You’re on the bench, I want to play,” I say to him, knowing we’ve been here before.

 

“Play the violin today, you like the piano too much,” he says, closing his eyes. “If you don’t give equal amount of attention to both instrument, the lesser played one would become jealous. If that happens, then it would become bitter and reject you if you play.”

 

I nod my head slightly at his little tale. Odd, I never heard it like that, and it's a bit funny. My teacher always did tell me not to favor the piano over the violin, something I used to always do. She constantly told me that it just as beautiful melodies.

 

“But I wanted to play the piano,” I protest. “You said you’d teach me Chopin’s Nocturne in Eb. Will you still?”

 

Not responding, he opens his eyes at me. Wordlessly, he raises from his laying position and sits up. “I'm not very good at teaching,” he says in an unconfident voice.

 

“You’re fine,” I say, remember how he help me with ‘Spring Sonata’. I fight to keep my face from flushing as I remember his warm embrace over me. Even though he’s uniform, I could feel his warmth. “Okay, then. I will play the violin for now.”

 

I walk to the wall and grab the violin before I can say or do anything stupid. I go to the shelf, determined to find the perfect piece to play. I look back and Shuu, who is still sitting up, gazing at me.

 

“Are you going to play also?” I ask him, nodding towards the piano. He shrugs but doesn’t lay back down. I take this as a ‘yes’ and find the appropriate piece I’ve been searching for. I take out the music sheets and walk over to the vampire.

 

“Do you know ‘Butterfly Waltz’?” I question handing him the papers. He doesn’t answer, instead he takes the sheets for my hands and looks over the notes. He places them on the stand and seats himself so he’s facing the black and white keys.

 

I walk over to the desk where I’ve placed the violin and pick up the instrument and bow. I walk back over to Shuu, fingers are now resting on the keys, ready to begin the piece. I place the bow on the strings of the violin, and with a deep breath, and start to glide it over them.

 

Only after I get the first note out does Shuu join me, as if the song can’t go another moment with the instruments not working together. The melody is one of my favorites, bringing with it a refreshing tune and feeling. The piece makes me feel light and carefree as if I can just fly away, like a butterfly. Our arms work to make the instruments sound as graceful as our limbs’ movement.

 

This piece being much slower than the last one I’ve seen Shuu play, I see his fingers moves agile across the board, pressing each key softly.

 

I’m close my eyes, becoming completely immersed in the song. It's been so long since I’ve played a piece of this kind and it made me feel like this. Like the world I live isn’t real, or that it's so far, far away. That everything that I hate and want to forget can be left as behind I fly away.

 

The melody that I feel as I can play forever is sadly only a few minute in length. Towards the end, there’s a brief violin solo. I forget that for a moment, so when I no longer hear the melody of the piano, I open my ear to see him looking at me with his unworldly blue eyes. I play the notes looking into his eyes. I then lower the instrument as he plays the final notes of the melody.

 

We are then silent for a moment. The piece left me relaxed and calmed, happy even. So at ease, I don’t notice Shuu getting off the bench and walking towards me. Not until he’s right in front of me. I look up at him, wonder why he got up, but I don’t utter a word.

 

My breath is stolen from me as Shuu raises his hand to my face. He fingers brush my cheek, wiping away a tear I wasn’t aware I’ve wept. My heart feels as if it's skipping a few too many beats, as if Shuu is taking them away from me.

 

“Why are you crying?” he says… concernedly. His words aren’t filled with annoyance or sleepiness, but actual concern. He’s close and he seems to be actually caring.

 

My mind is telling me that this isn’t good. Why am I crying in front of Shuu like this? This is going to end bad, say you had something in your eye, that you were unconsciously tearing up. Step back, slap his hand away, remove the contact, do something! Look away, stop gazing into those deep blue eyes.

 

But my limbs won't move, remaining still and heavy as stone. My tongue refuses to move to utter out a lie of any sort. And I don’t let our eye contact break, a stare into his ocean blue eyes as if am going to drown.

 

My heart speaks to me, over running my brain. It's fine Hikari, it's okay. Don’t refuse him, let him in. Stop pushing away the ones that are finally trying to give you a helping hand. Tell him what you’re thinking, what you’re feeling. Trust him.

 

No, my mind seems to protest. You don’t know if he’s going to hurt you. What if you hurt him? That is all you do to people, is hurt them or they hurt you. Maybe it's both. You are nothing but a natural disaster, hurting people and destroying everything.

 

“I..” I finally manage to croak out. “I think I was a bit too into the piece, that’s all.” I turn the corner of my lips up in a small, weak smile. I doubt he bought the fake expression, but he removes his hand from my face. I instantly miss the contact with him and have to hold myself back from taking his hand in mine and moving it back towards my cheek.

 

“I see,” he says slowly with the nod of his head. I nod back and use the heels of my wrist to wipe under my eyes, making sure all the tears are gone. I sniffle a bit, trying to collect myself. I take a few deep breaths before speaking again.

 

“You must think that I’m a complete nut,” I say with a small, forced laugh. I go over and set on top of one of the wooden tables, some distance away from the vampire who is on the piano bench. The awkwardness of the situation comes flooding to me and it makes me feel agonizingly stupid. “Suddenly beginning to cry over some sappy song someone made, how pathetic”

 

He doesn’t protest or anything. He simply closes his eyes as he fully reclines onto the bench. I smile at the fact that he’s still using the seat as a resting bench.

 

“Its also quite funny,” I say quietly, more to myself, looking down into my hands. “After everything I’ve been through, you would think that I’ve cried enough for this life and the next. Yet, I still find myself shedding tears as easily as I breath. Maybe Ayato’s right and I am messed up in the head. That would explain why my emotions and feeling as so weird.”

 

“What do you mean by that?” I hear Shuu ask. My head snaps up so fast that I think I may suffer from whiplash. I stare at the vampire in confusion.  It takes me a moment to realize that I was speaking out loud. More so, Shuu was actually listening. Oh God, I was having a stupid monology and he heard it all. I feel my cheeks redden a bit, proof my emotions are clearly being stupid.

 

“Oh, nothing,” I say looking away from him. I bet he can sense the rosiness of my cheeks without even needing to open his eyes. “I just think I’ve been hit in the head a few too many times.” I smile and slap my head slightly, trying to make a joke even though he doesn’t see me. “I also think that God was drunk when he made me. Well, I thought then when I believed in a god.”

 

“You no longer do?”

 

“Pft, yeah right,” I say with sarcasm and the flick of my wrist. “Like I would ever believe in such a being again. It's such a stupid system. Put people on this planet just to make their lives miserable, who would want to praise such an awful thing? And if there was a being that that, I hate it with all of my heart. How dear it take away the people we love? What kind of sick bastard would let someone who never done anything bad, who did nothing but make people happy, that care about the worst of people, someone so pure die? He never hit me, or yelled at me. He talked to be when Master Natsume was being rude or upset. He never lied to me and made me feel so happy, even under those rules and condition. He was like the older brother I never had, an amazing big brother. He said he would be there for me, always, even after I left. Be he wasn’t! He never took over the company or married Nanami, the love of his life! He didn’t even have his eighteenth birthday party! It's not even fair! Why did he have to die?! Why did he have to help me!?”

 

I feel the rage inside me boil and my face flare with anger. I begin to see red and know that I have to blow off some steam. Not knowing what else to do, I kick- when exactly did I get up?- the wooden bench as hard as I can. This causes the heavy bench to move about an inch or two and I feel pain shoot up my toes and all the way to my knee.

 

I wince in pain as my right foot throbs and I swear under my breath. I feel the rage leave me, left behind in its place the throbbing pain in my leg. I groan in annoyance and sit down on the bench that I kicked.

 

“Feel better,” Shuu mutters from the piano, eyes open, staring at me.

 

I cock my head to the side with a sarcastic smile and roll my eyes. “Yeah, I am. Hikari tantrum number two.”

 

“Two in under one month, I don’t know whether that’s good or bad.”

 

I smile to myself, so, is he trying to make me feel better? “I think that this one is more of a point five instead of a full one. Nothing seems to have broken, well, maybe my toe.”

 

“You can be quite the child. I would have hate to have seen your misfits when you were younger. Those poor souls, having to suffer though you petty tantrums.”

 

This, surprisingly, make me laugh. I try to catch my breath, but the laughter seems to have built up over the conversation and the dam has finally broken. My laughter floods out until my eyes start to water and I'm gripping my aching side. “Shu-uu, you’re vah-very funny,” I manage to say as I try to sustain a normal breathing rhythm.

 

He shrugs his shoulder as if I asked him a question. I shake my head in amusement. The chimes sound for the end of the period. I frown, knowing that my time in this room is over for the week. I have to wait through the weekend before coming back to play. With a sigh, I stand and get my bag, which was leaning against a leg of the piano.

 

“See you later, Shuu,” I say to him before heading to the door.

 

“We’re all messed up in our own ways, don’t be so hard on yourself,” Shuu says, making me freeze in my steps.

 

I turn around, shocked at his words. “What di-” I start, but notice that the vampire is gone. His word seems to echo throughout my mind. He… just gave me advised. On top of that, he was still trying to make me feel better.

 

I feel my heart throb a bit and place my hand on my cheek. I’m smiling like a fool, how stupid. Shuu, the least talkative and most distinct of the vampires, was trying to cheer me up. Is it possible to die because of an extreme mix of shock and happiness? If it never happened before, I think I might be the first to find these emotions fatal.

 

He actually cares about me and my feelings.

 

The whole way to Home Ed I play with my cheeks, trying to ease my muscles out of the stupid grin Shuu inflicted on me. I just can’t shake off this feeling of pure bliss.

 

I’ve managed to get the smile off my face by the time I get to class, but I bet I'm still a bit pink. I find a seat in the back of the classroom and take out my notebook. I stop when I come upon the doodle of the cherry blossom. I trace my fingers over the petals a few times.

 

My rant I went on not twenty minutes ago comes back to me, slapping me in the face. I just ranted about Kaname being dead to Shuu! How could I do that? He must have felt so awkward and strange. How was he even supposed to react to that?

 

I told myself I wasn’t going to bring up the past, that this was my blank slate. I’m dirtying this life with the crap from my past. Well, it's not crap, sorry Kaname. And, again, Shuu doesn’t need to hear any of it, I bet he doesn’t want to. I’m so stupid, telling about that life that has nothing to do with Shuu.

 

I feel ashamed and guilty, but Shuu didn’t seem to care. He sounded genuinely concerned and try to cheer me up. There you go Hikari, he was trying to light up your dark mood, so don’t let it take back over.

 

I inhale deeply and let it out, let go of my negative feelings. I look up to see Kanato walking through the door, Teddy in hand. He looks over at me with an expressionless face. Deciding he wanted to sit by me, the purple hair vampire slowly walk towards the desk I'm seated at.

 

He sits beside and places his bear on the desk in front of himself. He doesn’t say anything or even acknowledge my existence.

 

“Hello, Kanato,” I say, no noticeable emotion in my words.

 

“Hello, Hikari,” he says flatly, followed by silence.

 

“Thank you for healing my wound,” I say, confident that’s what he did. Although, if that wasn’t the case, this would turn pretty awkward.

 

“I said it was a thank you, no need to thank me back,” he say to the bear, not even looking in my direction. I decide to leave it at that as the chimes sound. Class begins and I notice that Laito isn’t here. Oh well, I guess I won't need to see him until science.

 

Class ends in what seems to be a blink of an eye. The chimes ring, dismissing us for the day. I get up and fish out a handout and paper. I hold them in my hand as I walk over to my teachers desk.

 

“Here is my paper and hand out,” I say, offering her my word.

 

She turn around and looks surprised that I’m standing before her. “Oh, Ms. Komori,” she says shocked. She takes the papers from me and looks at them. “Didn’t you already turn in you assessment?”

 

“The ones you’re referring to are the ones I didn’t receive Monday, I already turned them in. The handout is part of the extra word you gave me yesterday and the essay is the report you assigned Tuesday which is due Monday. I was already giving you the handout, so I decided to give you the essay, since I'm done with it,” I explain to her. She looks at me questionably. “Should I take it back and wait until next we-”

 

“No, that’s not needed,” she say dismissing the thought with the wave of her hand. She smiles softly at me. “I just didn’t expect you to turn these in so soon. This is a great improvement from last week. I just might forgive you for being late and skipping,” she say was a sly smile. “Although I thought that detention was the best way to go, but I guess I’ve been corrected.”

 

I looked at her confused. “Excuse me?”

 

“I honestly think that with the behavior you were showing, detention was the best way to go. I know longer think it's necessary, though.”

 

“Wait, so you didn’t take me out of detention?” This whole thing is confusing. She thinks that making a student sit in a chair for an hour is the best way to improve their behavior, why take me out of detention?

 

“Oh, no I didn’t. Mr. Midori didn’t either,” she says referring to my science teacher. “Your guardian discusses with us that he would prefer to take you out of detention, saying that it's not the best way to discipline you. He said just to give you some more work.”

 

“My guardian?”

 

“Yes, Mr. Sakamaki, Shuu Sakamaki, the eldest of them. Although, having a student as your guardian is quite odd, but am not here to question the system.”

 

I nod my head and excuse myself. I try to wrap the newly gained knowledge around my head. Shuu, as in Shuu Sakamaki, took me out of detention. Even though it was Reiji’s destination and Shuu rarely takes charge of things.

 

The feeling from earlier finds itself back into me. How can your feeling towards someone skyrocket like this in two hours? I place my hand over my chest, feeling my heart pound. Shuu, would it be possible for him to explain whatever you’re thinking?

 

* * *

 

“Wow,” I say, completely stunned. I hold out a shirt my sister picked up when she went shopping. It is a beautiful sapphire blue with a white rose on one of the shoulders, its thorny vines going midway down the long sleeve. “This is so gorgeous.” I smile at the shirt and then back at her. “I love the rose, so cool. And this shade of blue, I love it.”

 

She smiles at me from the chair by the window. “Yeah, I knew you would love the shirt, especially the color.”

 

“The color?” I look at it closely. I gasp in surprise as I realize it's the same blue color as the eyes I’ve been staring into all day. “Yui,” I gasp astonished. “You did that on purpose.”

 

Glee fills her face and she nods, covering her smile with her hand. I let out a short laugh. I bunch up the shirt and throw it at her. She puts her hands up to block the bundle of clothing. “Nope, take it back,” I tease.

 

“I know you like it,” she says, tossing the shirt onto my bed next to me, alongside the other clothing she brought me. One is a simple grey jacket, for when the weather gets colder. The other is a sweater that fades from black to purple.

 

“Thank you so much for these, they’re awesome,” I say sincerely to my sister. “Subaru seriously let you get these?”

 

I see her facial expression change slightly as if an emotion far greater than happiness has taken over. She forced a smile at me and says, “Yeah, he was fine with it. I also got some stuff too. Sorry, I didn’t get these to you earlier, I completely forgot about the clothes. Well, at least you got the music player, does it work?”

 

“Oh, yeah it does.” I think about how I left the music room. I was in such an awestruck state that I completely forgot to pick up a CD. It seems as though Shuu came through once more, and there was a CD waiting on my bed in the exact same place as the earphones were. I know it was him for two reasons: someone left me a CD and it wasn’t just any CD, but Chopin’s Nocturne in Eb. I would be lying if I said that I didn’t listen to it as soon as I saw it. I played the piece on repeat until I was completely finished with my homework.

 

“Thank you again for that,” I say. I look over to Yui who is looking at the clothing on my bed. This is such a good moment, one that I want to cherish. When Yui and I are just being sisters and forgetting about the vampires.

 

But I know that a life without the vampires is a fictional one. I need to talk to her about Subaru or whatever is troubling her. I hate to ruin this peaceful time, but this needs to be done.

 

“There something I need to say,” we say in unison at each other. Our identical words take up both by surprise.

 

“You first,” she insisted.

 

“No, you first,” I protest.

 

“It's fine, jus-”

 

“Listen to your older sister,” I say with a ‘threatening’ finger point. She faintly smiles at my playfulness, but it soon leaves her face. The dejected look from earlier return to her, making my stomach twist.

 

“I’ve needed to tell you something for some time now,” she says, shifting in her chair. The way she says it makes me want to silence her, but whatever it is, I have to hear it. I just know that this may end very badly.

 

“I...I remember how you looked when you were taking that day,” she says, which confuses me. She seems to notice and she begins to explain. “I can only imagine what you felt at the moment, the confusion, fright. Yes I was feeling the same way, but your emotions were far greater. You were taking away because you said you were willing to protect me. And after that, you suffered for so long and so hard. You went through hell, all for me, something that I could never repay.”

 

“Yui, I tol-”

 

“Hikari, please,” she said putting her hand up. “Every bad thing that has happened to you in past four years was because you decided to protect me, your younger sister. So when you came here, I was so happy. I could be with you and make up for all that time we were apart. When I heard about Laito, well, I just couldn’t let it happen to you again. I wasn’t going to let him drag you back to Hell. So… so I said that I would take your place as long as he didn’t bother you.”

 

“You took my place…” What is she saying? I sense something very bad about Yui’s words. She wanted to repay me. What could she possibly me- “Yui!” I exclaim, a bit harsher than I expected.

 

She looked down at her hands in shame. I feel as if my world has just started rolling to utter destruction. A million things seems to go through my head yet a single word can’t leave my lips. I stare at my sister for so long I’m surprised she hasn’t started to grow old.

 

“Please don’t tell me what I’m thinking is right,” I beg as if I may just be going crazy. Yeah, that’s right, I'm messed up in the head. I have to me because there is no way she is implying what I think she is.

 

She shakes her head, her hands clenching the hem of her skirt and I see her start to breath heavily. We both know that coherent words won't be able to leave her mouth even is she tried.

 

I get off my bed and walk over to her. I lower myself onto my knees in front of her. I take one of her hands into mine. I feel a mix of anger, sympathy, and uncertainty swell inside me. I want to hug her and scold her at the same. But I know that if I’m harsh this would only turn even worse. I need to stay calm, even though it's quite hard for me.

 

“Yui, what exactly happened, you need to tell me,” I say, tightening my hands around hers. I try to keep my breath at a calm pace although my mind and heart are racing at an unhealthy rhythm.

 

“I-I,” she starts through a hiccuping sob. “I slah-slept w-w-with him.”

 

I feel my jaw clench in anger, she slept with him!? I feel the anger in me build up and it takes every nerve in my body to stop myself from screaming and destroying something.

 

I want to scream at her, tell her how that doesn’t solve anything, but then I remember why she did. She wanted to keep him away from me. Everything soon becomes so clear I felt as if I was blind to not see it.

 

Laito stopped harassing me because he and Yui had a deal. The rage inside me soon morphs into the two most awful emotion one can experience, guilt and regret. She did all of this because I told her that Laito raped me.

 

I feel as if I am going to throw up, completely disgusted with myself. She did this, because of a lie! I let go of her hands place them on my head. How could I lie to her? Because of that stupid sentence she went through something that could have totally been avoided. And I lied to her because I was too much of a coward to tell her that I had sex with him. I truly am the worse of people.

 

“Yui… Yui am so, so sorry,” I say, feeling the tears of sadness and guilt stream down my face. “You went through all of it, because of a lie, because I was too shameful to tell you that I did have sex with Laito. I made you do something that you never had to even think about. Am so, so sorry. I know this can’t make up for what happened to you, but Yui, I just can’t. I’m horrible, I’m despicable, I-”

 

I am cut off by and unexpected impact. My sister wraps her arms around me tightly sobbing into my shoulder. Unable to keep back my own tears, I hold her just as tight and let my tears stream down my face.

 

She releases me and I hold on a moment longer before letting go. "Yui, I.. I don't know how I'm supposed to say or do. What yo-"

 

"It was inevitable," she says weakly with a shake of her head.

 

"What do you mean?"

 

"It was bound to happen. Me living here with all these vampire, it was going to happen eventually. At least I wasn't forced."

 

I sigh at my sister. Even though she has lost her virginity for a reason that wasn't for herself, she was still looking to the bright side of the problem.

 

"Getting fucked isn't something you should do for someone else's sake," I mumble under my breath. She must have heard me because she look more upset than she already was. I immediately regret saying the words, knowing they aren’t going to help the current situation at all.

 

“Why does it seem as if we’re only hurting each other?” I ask quietly.

 

“Yeah, it seems like that,” Yui says with a sigh.

 

“I think we bitched about things more in these past three weeks than most sisters do in a lifetime.”

 

“I guess that mean that there would be no reason for us to go through this again.”

 

I nod at her and she reflects the motion.

 

I move the hair that has curtained her face and wipe away her tears. “I’m still sorry about lying to you. You can say it is okay, but I don’t think I could forgive myself.”

 

She nods her head in understandment. “I guess communication isn’t our strong point,” she jokes and I smile at her attempt to lighten the mood. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about this stupid deal.”

 

“At least you told me.” I fix my hair and look at my sister. “Do you want to step outside for a bit? Cool night air is good for the body and soul.” She smiles and get up from the floor. I try to stand and immediately fall back down. My left leg has gone numb, the pin and needles feeling shooting up my leg. I sit back down and keep my leg still.

 

“Fuck.,” I swear, I hate this. I wiggle my foot, trying to wake it up. It feels like getting a tattoo all over again and I try to shake off the feeling.

 

“You swear a lot, it's not the best thing Hikari,” my sister lectures.

 

“Ha, I know, but I can’t help myself. The Keis were quite the foul-mouthed, and it seemed to have rubbed off on me. You should have seen the doctor’s expression hen I swore often, god, it was priceless. He said the same thing you said, saying it was frowned upon and unholy.”

 

“So what did you say?” my sister ask, seemingly interesting.

 

I smirked and look up at her. “I start saying ‘holy fuck’. Every time I felt like I was going to spit out a foul word, I would say holy first. It drove them crazy.”

 

My sister gasps and shakes her head at me. I smile and get up once my leg is back to normal. I suggest that she washes her face as I put away my new clothes. I open the wardrobe get some hanger to put my new clothes on. When I put them in, I notice something at the very back of the wardrobe.

 

I take it off the hanger and examine it. It's a school blazer, but it doesn't look like mine. The memory of Laito giving me the jacket comes surging back to me. I never did get around to returning the jacket. After hearing about him talking Yui into becoming his personal plaything, I want to burn the jacket just knowing it's his. I sigh, now I have to go to him and return his belonging. I threw it back in the wardrobe and close the doors as Yui step out of the bathroom.

 

“Ready?” she says and I smile to her in response. We make our way down the halls and stair and outside in silence. The nights seem to be getting cooler and I know in a week’s time I'm going to be using the new jacket my sister got for me

 

We walk in the area the where lamps’ light overrules the darkness of night. The only sound is out feet on the marble walkway.

 

“Shouldn't we have told Reiji we were going outside?” Yui question. I think about how angry he was last time, making me shiver.

 

“We should’ve, but there nothing wrong. As long as we aren’t out here long, I don't think he would even notice our absence. Besides, anyone can see us from one of the windows.”

 

She nods her nods and makes an expression as if she is considering something. She inhales deeply and lets it out. We walk in a silence that isn’t filled with any negative feeling. Our footsteps  are the only sound in the night air.

 

Yui takes my hand in hers, surprising me. She turns to me and gives me a genuine smile. “No matter what may happen, I’m happy that we are together again.”

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Both Yui and Hikari finally got something of their chest. Hikari honestly spoke out about Kaname and Yui confessed about the deal with Liato. The reason I decided the title Smile is because that is something they are constantly doing, even when they are having an internal struggle. It just shows how strong they are.
> 
>  
> 
> 'Holy fuck'. A very funny phrase, right? I went to the fair last week and my friend Otaku Prince kept screaming 'HOLY FUCK!' on every scary ride we got on. See, you can get inspiration from anyone and anything.
> 
>  
> 
> Since you guys asked, I will do both Subaru's and Shuu's POV in the new future.
> 
> The song Hikari played is Brian Crain & Rita Chepurchenko 'Butterfly Waltz'. It is one of my favorite works, you have to listen to it
> 
>  
> 
> Like always, comment your thoughts and continue reading.


	25. Memories

**Shuu’s POV**

 

It has been a whole five minutes since the chimes have sound, yet I haven’t heard or smelt Hikari at all. I know it takes her about three and a half minutes to get to this side of the school from her history class. I know this because I used to walk from that boring excuse of a class to this magnificent room almost every day two years ago. 

 

Maybe it's her short legs or she is talking to a friend or someone, but her absence worries me. What if those punks are messing with her again? The last thing I want to do is have to get in trouble with the board because I had to knock up some assholes. But I will do anything from kicking someone’s ass to murder for the people care about.

 

The thought that she may decide not to come won't leave my mind, like a horrible, lingering aftertaste. No matter how many excuses I try to use to drown it out, the possibility still whispers in my head. Maybe after yesterday’s outburst, she’s embarrassed and doesn’t want to come. She wasn’t acting strangely during dinner or breakfast if anything she seemed happier than usual.

 

I glance at the clock that is placed over the blackboard on the other side of the room. I sigh, but its goes unheard because of the chimes ringing out through the once quiet room. The room that should be anything but silent. 

 

I spent my whole weekend listening to the still monotonous sounds people call art. Even though I used to listen to the songs until music player died, I find myself stopping most songs short. The only melodies that give me any sort of happiness are the one’s played by Hikari. I know that I’m not going to hear her playing properly for a while, though. This week I’m supposed to be teaching her that piece she has been pestering me about.

 

I rise from the sofa I’ve been resting on and walk over to the shelf that store of music sheets. I find Chopin’s  _ Nocturne in Eb _ and make my way over to the piano. I sit on the bench, place the paper in their display, and, surprisingly, start to press each key from left to right. I guess her habit is rubbing off on me.

 

The second I lift my finger from the last key, I sense her. I hear her footsteps speed walking down the hall, her breath coming out a bit harder than usual. The faint smell of her vanilla lotion and natural aroma soon follow the sound of her footsteps.

 

I sigh a small breath of relief,  _ so she is coming today _ . I recline onto the bench, knowing that she will be annoyed by this like last week. I think back to Friday and how she was repeating my name in various, silly ways. It took more effort than usual to keep a smile from forming across my face. A month ago the task was as simple as blinking or breathing, but the moment I saw her again, I knew it would become much harder. But I know it’s worth being able to see her like this, as if she’s an entirely different person. I know now that she is happy and has a certain shine in her eyes. The shine I told myself months ago I would bring her when I first saw her nearly lifeless eyes.

 

Even though I promised myself I will be the one to change her, it seems like she is doing just that to me. Not only has she realised the feelings and emotions I have locked away, but also some memories I would want to stay in the past. Even if she isn’t aware of it, she seems to be finding ways to uncover my hidden emotions. Like the way she called be Shuu-sama completely destroyed my neutral facade I force myself to put up. 

 

I hear Hikari’s feet stop in front of the door as she takes in a breath. Why does she do that all the time know? She has done that every day she has been here since leaving detention. Is she frightened to be alone with my after I bit her? A heavy fog of regret begins to lower down on me. Never had I interned to hurt her. I knew I was going to lose control and harm her, and I tried to hold back. It is as if my wishes are not ignored, but rather responded to with the opposite of my desire.

 

I sigh a breath of annoyance before the door is opened. I don’t need to look her way to know that Hikari  is staring at me with her beautiful, pink eyes. I have her annoyed yet amused expression carved into my memory after seeing it so often.

 

I hear her walk over to me with her light footsteps and her breath coming out at a normal rate once again. She stops in front of me and I can feel the heat from her body even though we aren’t touching.

 

“Shuu,” she says sternly. “The piano bench is not a resting bench. It is where you sit when you are playing the instrument known as the piano, ehci is in front of you. Since you are neither playing the piano nor seating properly, I’m going to ask you to please relocate yourself.”

 

I almost have to bite my cheek to keep from smiling at her. The way she spoke was so sternly and seriously it’s ridiculous, like a mother explaining something to a simple minded child. I don’t make any action to move and the brunette groans.

 

“Stop acting like you're part of the seat,” she says, clearly frustrated, yet there is a hint of a laugh in her voice. 

 

“Maybe I am,” I say quietly, teasing the girl.

 

“Is that so?” she question and I can hear the mischievous edge in her voice. I feel the warm of her increase and I don’t have a second to react before I feel the weight of her on me. She sits on top of me so she is on my navel and slightly on top of my crotch.

 

I move my arm from my face and final look at the human. She smirks down at me in what seems to be a challenge. I raise a brow up at her and she smile widens in return. She twists her body so she faces the piano. She covers the instrument's keys and places her bag on the flat surface. She opens it and takes out a bag of grapes. 

 

“This seat has gotten very uncomfortable from the last time I was on it,” she complains as she pops a grape into her mouth. I roll my eyes at her. She is now off guard, perfect time.

 

I easily rotate my abdomen so she is launched off of me. She yelps slightly and as is is thrown onto her feet. Unprepared, she stumbles and hooks her left foot onto her right ankle. Having no balance she falls face first onto the floor with her ass in the air. As a bonus, her skirt lands on top of her back, revealing her panties; black with white polka dots and a red lace trimming.

 

“I approve you panties, does your bra match?” I asked before I could think of my words. The human gasp and quickly stands up to fixes herself. I see her face turn a faint shade of pink and gives me a twisted expression.

 

“Seriously, Shuu?” she says in a voice that is frustrated trying her best to hide her embarrassment. “You're commenting on my underwear now. Ugh, I get enough of that shit from Ayato and Laito.”

 

“Unlike my brothers, I didn’t do it on purpose,” I counter, trying to make my voice emotionless although all I want to do is crack a smile or maybe even laugh. “A like I said repeatedly, I’m not like those two, so stop comparing me to them.”

 

“No like Laito and Ayato my ass,” she snaps.

 

“Well, your ass is quite large.” I smirk as I see her clench her jaw drop and face grow even redder, something I don’t see too often with her. I mentally smack myself for revealing such amusement. I’m able to erase the smile from my mouth, trying to recompose my calm and neutral expression.

 

She finds a lone grape on the floor and throws it at me. I could have easily move, but I stay still and let it hit me in between my eye, allowing her a bit of redemption.

 

“I’m leaving,” she declares. The claim makes me freeze for a moment. I sudden have a small internal panic. Is she going to leave for real? Is she going to come bacK? How pissed off is she at me? Was it really that bad?  _ God, Shuu, what’s wrong with you _ ? I try to think of something as she walks over and gets her bag from the piano.

 

“If you leave now then I won't be able to teach you Chopin’s  _ Nocturne in Eb _ ,” I say slyly, sounded far calmer than I feel. This makes her stop in her tracks and I feel as if I’ve won the battle. Her hesitation is clearly visible as she slowly turn around. She looks me in my eyes before walking over to me.

 

“Are you at least going to move?” she ask in defeat.

 

It seems as if her eyes can always do something to me and I’m soon unable to look into the pink orbs. I look around the room, eying the mess of grapes on the floor. “I will once you clean that mess.”

 

She follows my eyes to the discarded fruit and she proceeds in picking up the half dozen or so grapes that fell out of her bag. She places them in the trash and pick up the bag with the remaining grapes. 

 

Hikari begins to walk towards me with a raised eyebrow. I sigh and sit up and move to the left side of the seat. She plants herself by my side and continue consuming her grapes. Like she did with the pocky, she thrusts the bag over to me, wordlessly demanding that I take one. Even though I have no desire to eat, I take the small fruit and pop it into my mouth.

 

It is much too sweet for my liking and Hikari thankful pulls the bag back. “You don’t like sweets,” she says my thoughts out loud, which takes me by surprise. Not many people can tell what I really think, and I try my best to put up the fasade of an unamused teenager. 

 

I sigh and place my left arm on the little area left on the bench and lean my weight on the limb. “You say that why?”

 

“You didn’t eat much of the absolutely delicious cake I made,”-  _ modesty in a human form _ \- “you didn’t each much of the pocky, and your face scrunched a little when you ate the grape.” She lifts her chin up slightly, showing she is confident with her hypothesis. “I made sure to get the sweetest grapes, too.”

 

“So you were thinking about me when you were getting your food?”

 

She opens her mouth and closes it, as if thinking of her words and I see her face flush slightly. “You also spend your lunch here, so I doubted you eat anything until we get to the manor.”

 

Her concern makes me smile internally, and I have to let out a breath so it won't show. The human’s thought about my well being makes me want to show some kind of emotion so she knows that I appreciate it. But I know I can’t, I’m not allowed to open my heart ever again, I have hurt too many people, including myself. I already crossed that line Friday, and I know I have to stop before something truly horrible happens again. 

 

“That isn’t necessary,” I say. “I don’t even need to eat regularly, none of us do. ‘Us’ referring to my brothers of course.”

 

She seemed shocked by the statement and then gives me a confused look. “Then, why do you guys have both breakfast and dinner every day?”

 

I roll my eyes at the question. With a sigh I say, “Reiji wanted to have an eye on you two things. Even though he acts like a bastard of an intelligent person, that was the only idea he could come up with.”

 

“You’re giving me the impression that you don’t like going to eat two meals a day,” she says. She narrows her eyes at me in supersession. That isn’t necessarily true, though. I enjoy being assured I will see Hikari twice a day outside of school. Even if we only make eye contact, I cherish being in her presence. 

 

“If you don't like it, why don't you just end it? You are the eldest, you overrule Reiji. Your word overpowers his. If he makes a decision you don’t like, you can always change it. Like when you took me ou-” she catches herself before she says something she wanted to leave unsaid. 

 

I give her a questioning look, asking her to continue. She obviously doesn’t want to finish and she pops a the last grape in her mouth, assuring her silence.

 

“I thought it was a good idea for a while,” I say responding to her question. “I thought I would do it for about a month or so until you got fully settled in. I’m actually going to stop the whole thing soon, since you’r-”

 

“No!’ she exclaims, taking me by surprise. I look over and lean off of my arm and fully sitting up, look her in her eyes. She realizes what she did and looks down at the covered keys. “No more talking and questions, let’s just play.” She is clearly flustered, so I no longer speak. She is too easy to read and it's plain to see that she is trying to cover up her unexpected outburst, which she failed at.

 

I shrug it off, acting as if I didn’t notice her slip up. I reach over to get the music sheet. I see her flinch slightly as I outstretch my arm. Her action brings an aching feeling to my heart for a millisecond. Why would she move away from me? The thought of her being frightened by me tries to creep back into my head, but I quickly let it out. 

 

Pretending to ignore her movement, I grab the paper from the stand. Studying the simple piece is a fake I put up so make Hikari think I’m busying myself. Out of my peripheral vision, I see her staring at me, but she doesn’t do anything but that. No visible presentation of fright or worry.

 

“I told you Friday,” I say handing her the sheet. “I’m not a very good teacher.” She takes the page and nods her head, placing it back on the stand. 

  
  


“It’s been a while since I learned a new song,” she says almost shyly. “I almost fully knew  _ Spring Sanoto _ so it was easier for me to get it last time.”

 

The gears of my brain move a bit slower than usual as I try to remember what she is talking about. As if the gears clicked into place, the memory comes back to me. Last Thursday I helped her with that piece. The sound of our first duet plays in my head and I silently hope we have more to come.

 

“Is it hard?” she asks nervously. I look over to her and notice she is tugging at her hair. The brown strands of silk are twirled around her finger, something she seems to be constantly doing.

 

“You can’t ask me, I learned this years ago. For me, it was midocer when it comes to diffulectly.”

 

She nods and, like always, proceeds in pressing the keys from right to left. She makes it about two-thirds of the away before she can no longer tap the next key without reaching over me. Not giving it a second thought, I finish the remaining keys for her. She looks on and cocks her head to the side. 

 

“You’re left-handed.” She says it as a fact, not actually asking. I give her a lazy nod and she shrugs it off. “Well, hopefully, this won't be too hard. Thanks to you, I was about to listen to it for the past three days.” She looks away from the keys and up to me. “Thanks for the CD and the earphones.”

 

Her smile is sincere and her eyes have a sparkle that can outshine any star. I shrug at her, although I want to say and do so much more. I get off the bench, allowing her to sit properly. I walk over to the shelf and get the stool that stands beside it. I move it over the piano and seat myself on it.

 

I turn my attention on Hikari, pink eyes still glued to me, and say, “Show me what you got.”

 

_

 

“Wrong, again,” I sigh. I shake my head once again, and I’m surprised it hasn't rolled off my shoulder because of the constant movement. I look over to Hikari who lowers her fingers from the key with an angered expression.

 

She bangs her fist on the keys, causing a few random notes play out. “Can you at least tell tell me what I’m doing wrong instead of just saying ‘wrong’,” she says through clenched teeth. “Wrong, wrong, wrong, that’s all you say! Can you please do something instead of criticizing me, like, I don’t know,  _ help me _ .” She breathes heavily with anger, but the boils soon goes down to a simmer. She takes a deep breath and holds it in for a bit, closing her eyes. She lets it out after a couple of seconds and leans back slightly. “Sorry about that. Just… sorry” She has apologized to me about two dozen time since we began this session a half hour ago.

 

“You should play from the knowledge you have,” I point to the music sheets, ”and the memory you have.” I point to my head. “Once I figure out what parts you're doing wrong, we will work on those.”

 

She takes a breath and nods her head. “Is that how you learned?” I nod my head in response. “Well it must have been pretty hard,” she says. “My teacher would stop me every time I played the wrong note and made sure I had that section of the piece mastered before moving on.”

 

“New teacher, new method,” I counter. 

 

She shrugs and stretches her arms. I see her eyes trail over to the clock on the wall. “The period is going to end soon, I’ll stop here.” She covers the keys with a sigh. She starts to turn her body in my direction, this causes her legs to knock her school bag off the bench besides her. Two books fall out of the bag and slide in my direction. 

 

I look at the two, one of which takes my interest. I pick up the book with a questioning look. I adjust my gaze at Hikari, who stares at me with a mixture of embarrassment and frustration. I turn the book so the title is facing her. “Are you really reading this crap?” 

 

“Well… ur, um,” she murmurs. He faces seems to brighten slightly. A second letter, it seems like she regains her confidence. “I know it if mostly filled with crap and stupid stuff. There were a few fact that I knew for sure are true and dozens that are pure rubbish. I just wanted to see what the author thought about vampires. The other creatures are interesting also.”

 

I roll my eyes and toss her  _ Vampires, Werewolves, and other Supernaturals _ . She catches it and shoves it in her bag. I pick up the other and gaze at it. The book seems vaguely familiar and it takes almost all my focus to remember where I’ve seen it. The memory comes into my mind and I quickly dismiss it.

 

I walk over and give the brunette the novel. She takes it and mumbles out a ‘thank you’. She shoves the book in her bag along with the other. “I have a question for you,” she says softly.

 

I look down at her with a raised brow. “Which is?”

 

“You were the one that, uh, changed me when I first arrived at the mansion, right?”

 

I roll my eyes at her. “We already established that I was,” I say with a groan. Is she still acting like this because of the panty thing?

 

“Did… did you see a bottle in my bag?”

 

“Bottle?” 

 

“Yeah, a p-pill bottle.” I shake my head at her, not remembering seeing anything like that when I opened her bag. I saw clothing and other random necessities, I wasn’t really looking through it, I was just finding clothes for her to wear. 

 

“Oh, okay then, thanks anyways,” she says, looking a little disappointed. Her expression makes me wish that I knew the location of this bottle so I can aid her in any way I could.

 

“What kind of pills are they?” The question leaves my mouth without a second thought.

 

She is taken back the question. “Nothing, nothing important.” She waves her hands frantically trying to dismiss the question. “If I really need anything, I will ask Reiji.”

 

“You shouldn’t trust him, and don’t take anything he gives you.” My voice comes out colder than I meant it to. She notices and it seems as if she hitched a breath. After moment, she eases up and lets out a sigh and nods in understanding.

 

The chimes ring out, notifying the students that they should start proceeding to their next class. “Time to go,” she says with a faint smile. “I will be back tomorrow, bye.” With the wave of her hand, she is out of the room and I listen to her fading footsteps. 

 

I walk over to the piano bench and sit down. I sigh, letting the sound echo off the walls of the room. The room that was filled with the almost unworldly sound of the piano, even though it  was almost completely butchered. I uncover the board, revealing the black and white keys once more. The desire to begin a song courses through my veins thicker than my own blood, but I don’t dare press a key. Not when he’s around.

 

“Are you going to stand out there forever?” I call out, my voice harsh and annoyed. “Do you have no other way to spend your time then standing out there all period?”

 

It takes a few seconds for the door to open. In the doorway stand Reiji, his arms crossed loosely across his chest. “For your information, I would much rather clean the stall than listen to that horrid excuse of a piano piece.”

 

My brother is as rotten as ever, and I wish I can throw him out like all the other garbage in my life. “Then why do you find it necessary to stand out there all period? I know it wasn’t only today, but Thursday and Friday also.”

 

He walks into the room and slides the door closed behind him. He stays next to the wall and stares at me coldly. “You really think I can just leave you alone with her after Monday? It would be a foolish thing after you almost killed her that day.”

 

My heart stings with guilt, and anger run through my body. I hate the way he can make me feel this anger and we both know I can’t do anything about it. Not here, not now, not when the rage is in its rawest stage. 

 

“She was far from dead, we both know that,” I spit out, trying to cover my guilt and sadness with a blanket of spite.

 

“That doesn’t justify your reckless behavior.”

 

“Do you really think I was trying to bite her? You and I both know that that was never my intention.”

 

“Which is the real problem. You have yet to inform me of why you were acting so brainless about taking her or Yui’s blood. Furthermore, it has been a total of three weeks and you haven’t told me why she’s here in the first place. We both know that her being a replacement bride if things go poorly is complete bullshit. It will only take minimum brainpower for the others to also figure this out and see straight through this completely obvious lie.” 

 

I know the lack of knowledge infatuated him to no end, and that is partly the reason why I don’t always reveal the source of my actions. That, and a handful of times I’m not quite sure why I do something I do.

 

“This is no place to be discussing thing like this,” I say, the announce in my voice is for too obvious to ignore. He sends a deadly glare in my direction and turns to leave the room.

 

“You can stop your little routine of spying on us now,” I say to him.

 

“I have no desire to continue,” he counters before slamming the door. He doesn't need to walk away for me to know that he has left. Almost as if it was declaring our argument over, the chimes ring out. 

 

I let out a sigh and get off the bench and walk over to the shelf. I find the piece that I tucked away, hiding it from both the world and Hikari, like if it's discovered it might as well be destroyed.

 

I place the sheets on the music stand and look at the notes that have been engraved into my mind. I rest my fingers on the key, readying them to play. 

 

But they won't move.

 

I can play any piece of any genre, but it seems impossible for me to even start this one. I haven’t heard it or played it in almost a full year, yet I feel this time could have been different. A completely foolish thought. My fingers stay frozen, like the memory of the girl who used to play the piece to me. 

 

I cover the board, no longer want to even look at the keys that play not only beautiful melodies, but with my heart and memories. I walk over to the couch and lay down. I should sleep before a feeling far stronger than sleepiness tries to take over, one that I long told myself I will shut away.

 

_ I raise my hand from the keys, trying to steady my breath. Throughout the piece I felt my anger leave every nerve in my body and was transformed into movement. That movement helped the piano understand my feels of rage and sound out throughout my room. I lean back slightly and close my eyes. _

 

_ “That’s not your usual type, Shuu-sama,” a soft voice says from the doorway. I feel the corner of my mouth turn up slightly as her voice travels down to me. It’s soft like silk and it  its can calm my raging mood in a second. _

 

_ “I wasn’t feeling like my usual self,” I reply. I hear her light footsteps make their way towards me. She set on the piano bench next to me, back towards the keys. _

 

_ I open my eyes and look over to her. Her brown hair that reaches to her lower back is in a braid. The jeweled cherry blossom hairpiece keeps her bangs out of her eyes. Her eyes are the same blue as a clear, blue sky, and she’s always as calm as one. She looks up at me, eyes filled with the kindness that I know I don’t deserve.  _

 

_ “Why is that?” she ask. _

 

_ I don’t want to tell her that I’m upset with my brothers for taking advantage of her kindness. I don’t want to tell he that I saw Laito messing with her in ways she only just recently let me touch her in. I don’t to tell her that her time here may be ending any day now. I don't want to tell her that I’m truly frighten that I may not be able to protect her if, when, the times comes. _

 

_ So I don’t tell her. _

 

_ “Nothing really, Reiji just pissed me off earlier,” I lie with a shrug. She nods, accepting the lie. The brunette twirls around so we are facing the same direction. She leans over and rests her head on my shoulder. The small contact is enough to send a swarm of warmth and bliss through my body, filling the void space the anger left. _

 

_ “I’m always here for you, Shuu-sama,” she says closing her eyes with a sigh. I know that the statement is nothing more than an unrealistic promise made by someone who doesn’t know the full truth of their situation. _

 

_ Even with this knowledge, I repeat the phrase I also say once she says hers. “And I’m always here for you.” A lie that I know could never be accomplished. I will never tell her this, though. I rather she has a happy illusion than a heartbreaking reality.  _

 

_ It is almost if our whole relationship is false, so I tell her the one thing that I know is true. “I love you.” The three words I haven’t uttered to anyone or anything in years. I place my hand on her head.  _

 

_ “I know,” she says, moving her head from my shoulder. She looks up  at me with her eyes that I swear are not of this world. I move my hand down to the smooth skin of her cheek. She leans her head into it as if it's a pillow. “I love you, too.” She leans over and places her lips on mine. _

 

_ And for those few seconds, all in the world is right, and there’s not a thing I would change.  _


	26. Time

**Yui’s POV**

I lean my head against the cool, glass window. Like every car ride to school, the fresh air from outside is banned from entering the vehicle. I look around the limo; everyone seems to be in their own world.

To my right is Ayato who plays with his tie. Next to him is Laito, hat over his face probably napping. Kanato softly talks to Teddy, a one way conversation to any outsiders looking in onto his world. Hikari is reading a novel, the same with Reiji who's beside her. Shuu leans head back, resting like usual.

I glance at Subaru from the corner of my eye. He sits between Kanato and Hikari. He doesn’t even glance my way. I feel as if the wall between us has only grown thicker and almost every nerve in my body wants to tear it down.

But I refuse to make the first move. Change that, I don't really know how to. Last week was the first time we've argued like that and I'm not even sure how to patch it up. So giving each other the cold shoulder is the tactic we both been going with. That means no sitting together, no unnecessary words between us, or eye contact.

Childish, yes. Do I have a better idea that I'm completely sure will work, no.

We pull up to the school and I’m the first to leave the limo. I stand off to the side as the vampires and Hikari get out.

I step away as the vehicle leaves, but I don’t head for the doors. Reiji, Shuu, and Subaru walk in the front and Hikari and the triplets a few steps behind them. My sister fights with Ayato to give her back her book, but the vampire laughs at her struggle. I see her fist clench, almost as if she is about to punch the redhead.

To everyone’s surprise, Shuu turn towards the boy and says, “Give her back the stupid book, it is too early for you two to be making so much noise.”

Ayato is frozen in shock for a moment at his brother’s order. Hikari takes this window of opportunity to snatch the book from the vampire’s hand. She speed walks ahead of everyone to enter the building first.

I’m not sure whether it is the lights playing tricks on me or my sleepiness still fogs my vision a bit, but I think I just saw Hikari flash a smile at the blue-eyed vampire and mouthed a ‘thank you’. Again, it could just be me, but the action shouldn’t be so strange. She already said she likes him and thanking him seems to be the proper way to respond to what he just did for her. But her smile was so genuine, as if the reason she had it was more than a bow on top of the thank you.

I walk slowly in the halls that lead to my homeroom. School can be such a bother sometimes, and I wish to be able to take a day or two off. Reiji would never allow it though. The day he gives me the ‘stay home’ pass is the day the Laito becomes a proper gentleman and both Shuu and Subaru laugh. Yeah, the day will never come.

I step into homeroom and settle down in my desk in the middle of the classroom. Hikari sits behind me, nose still deep in her book. I realize at this moment that we never were able to discuss what was on her mind Friday.

I want to ask her about it, but I think better of it. Whatever it is, it's probably something that should be handled at school or when no one is around. Instead, I turn around in my chair and ask, “What is that book even about?”

Reality must have been moving in slow motion for Hikari because it took her more than a second or two to notice that I was talking to her. She looks up from the pages with a ‘Hm’.

“The book,” I say pointing to the mentioned novel. “You’re really into it, what is it about?”

As if she didn’t know I what I was referencing, she follows my pointed finger to the book in question. “Oh,” she say in realization. “It’s about a girl who grows up in a household where her parents want her to be someone she isn’t. She leaves the rich hags for a day to go into the woods her parents own. There she meets this boy by a mysterious well. Things happen and it turns out that the boy and his interior family are immortal because they drank from this magical spring.”

I nod my head as she feeds me the information. “It sound quite interesting.”

She smiles with glee. “Yeah, it really is. Do you want to read it when I’m done?”

“It’s fine, I’m not very good with English.”

The chimes ring and the teacher comes in, silencing the class. I sigh knowing the day is only going to drag on like it seems to always do. If I knew what day it would be, I would spend my last day here. In these halls, the day would feel like a millennia. At the same time, there are moments where I wish I could stay here forever. Time is nothing but an illusion here.

___

I close my notebook and proceed in placing it in my bag. With Literature finally being over, I can go have lunch. For a second, I’m mentally preparing to go see Subaru, but then I remember that we are having our own personal Cold War.

“Yui,” a voice sings my name behind me. I look to see Hikari next to me, a smile plastered on her face. “What are you doing today, Yui?”

“Uh..” My sister has been acting a bit strange the past couple of days. She seems more bubbly than usual. I thought it was fine at first, but now it is a bit strange. I’m happy she isn’t miserable or anything, but it's still a bit odd. ”I’m having lunch with a friend from Home Ed.”

“Oh yeah,” my sister says. “There was something wrong with the power in the classroom, so no more cooking for the next week or so. That really sucks, but whatever.”

“Um, Hikari?”

“Hm?” she hums, placing her hands on my desk and leaning onto them.

“Is there something happening?”

She cocks her head to the side with a questioning look. “Excuse me?”

“You just seemed so happy these past few days.”

She makes and ‘o’ with her mouth as she pieces something in her mind together. “Hm, I’m not quite sure. Maybe because nothing bad has happened over the weekend or Monday. Shuu started giving me piano lesson, which I’m really looking forward to.”

I nod my head. She properly taking that eagerness to play the piano and converting it to joy without even noticing it. She has always done this, I’m surprised I didn’t catch on earlier.

I see my sister look up to the clock. “I need to go before I’m late to History. Bye,” she says with a wave. I wave back at her and she leaves the room.

I grab my bag and walk over to the door. I make my way to the cafeteria, a place I haven’t been in weeks. I had lunch there for the first week or so of attending this school. After that, I started to cook in Home Ed and I went to go see Subaru. I never had a reason to go back to the cafeteria, especially if I was reserving my lunch break to see the hot-tempered vampire. I sigh at the thought of him.

I enter the cafeteria and spot Akira in the corner of the area. We have been in the same group in Home Ed and Art multiple times, so we know each other quite well. She has short maroon hair that just passes her ears. There is a beauty mark over her left eyebrow and her eyes are a honey color. She smiles warmly at me and waves me down.

I make my way over towards her with a smile. I sit next to her and get out my bento. We eat with light conversation. She gossips about her boyfriend, Keita. I don’t intervene as she ranted about how he always hangs out with his friend more than her. She tells me the ideas for the date she is planning and I give her my two cents here and there.

Honestly, I envy her. She lives such a normal life, one I can only dream of. A life where dates and gossip are the things you care most about. You don’t have to think about vampires biting you or being harassed by a pervert you lived with. I would honestly trade own lives in a heartbeat, but I know such a thing isn’t possible. Besides, I wouldn’t want anyone going through something I hate.

“Yui?” Akira asks, snapping me back to reality.

“Oh, sorry, what did you say?” I ask, a bit embarrassed for spacing out.

“I want to know are you dating any of the Sakamaki boys?”

My eyes widen in shock. “No, no of course not.”

She smirks and takes a swing from her water bottle. “You sure? I know you live with them and all, but none of them seem… interesting to you?”

 _Yes, one does. Right now we aren’t talking, even though all I want to do is ramble to him like I used to do. I want to apologize and mend this rift between us. But I can’t because he’s being stupid and I know if I try to talk to him it will just end badly. So right now let’s just say we are starting Cold War II._  “No, not really”

She groans at my words. “I swear the luckiest people never notice. You are staying with six hot dudes, and you think of them as only living complains, wow. You're too innocent for your own good. You’ve known them for, what, three months now? You sister, Haruhi-”

“-Hikari,” I correct her.

“-yeah, Hikari. I heard she was seeing Shuu in that music room. Wait,” she places her finger on her chin and looks up, trying to recall something. “Weren’t you in the courtyard with the white hair one? What happened, did you fight or something?”

Hit the nail right on the head. I sigh and shake my head. I rather people not know the details of my relationship with the vampires. Akira was one of the first people that opened up to me at this school. Although she is flamboyant and direct, two qualities lack, she is kind at heart and has helped me in this new place. Of course I’ll never tell her about the brothers being vampires or my personal life in depth, but she never pesters.

“We kind of got I an argument last week and things ended badly.”

“So you're playing cold shoulder,” she shrugs and bites into her onigiri. “Things will be better soon, don’t worry.” She moves the rice ball away from her mouth with a sigh. “I doubt you would lie to me, so I have to tell those annoying girl in my class that they are being told some crazy bull.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, this group of girls asked me to ask you if you were dating any of the boys, Laito in particular. They said that there is talk about you and Laito going out or something like that. Because I have a stupidly large mouth, I mentioned that I was going to have lunch with you. They immediately jumped on me and begged for me to ask.”

I drop my jaw in shock. Laito and me? The thought itself makes me shudder. Yeah, we did _it_ , but there wasn’t any romantic feeling. _Ew, no, that makes sound really wrong Yui_. “No, Laito and I are totally not a thing, and we will never be. That is a horrible thing to even think.”

“I didn’t know myself, so I wanted to get it straight from you. I don't like any of that asking around shit. If you can’t get it straight from the horse’s mouth, then there is no reason to believe anything.”

I nod. I shouldn’t be so surprised about the question. It was only a matter of time before people started question my relation with the vampires. I don’t think it’s any of their business, but I rather them know the truth then a lie I’m disgusted with myself. It isn’t such a crazy question, so I let it slide, for now at least.

I finish my food. I tell Akira I need to go to the restroom before class. We say our goodbyes for now as I head off towards the restroom.

Not complete conscious of it, I take the way that leads to the courtyard area where Subaru and I used to meet up. I’m slightly curious to see whether her there or not. As I make my way down the halls, I see I sight that I doubt I would ever forget.

Hikari, as in my older sister, is sitting next to Subaru in our usual spot. She has a tube by her side, like the ones that they keep the maps for class in. I see her stand up after saying something and place her hand on his shoulder. Something inside my screams for Subaru to shrug off her touch, to make her break the contact, but he does. She pats him and walks away, her back towards me.

I stare in their direction for a moment before my feet begin to move again. Even though I walk at an incredibly slow pace, my mind seems to be running a marathon. Why in the world was she over there with him? What were they talking about? Why did she touch him? The questions go unanswered and I know I’m going to have to wait until later to speak with her.

_Yui, get a hold of yourself. So what is she wants to talk to him, it's not your place to pick and choose who Subaru speaks with. Now you’re just being ridiculous. What she has to say to Subaru isn’t any of your business._

Still, the need for an answer won't let me be.

* * *

** Hikari’s POV **

I walk to the office to return the maps with a look that can only be described at defeat. I know I should stop pestering him or he’ll hate me, but I just can’t leave Subaru alone. Like last week, he was sitting alone looking extremely glum.

I told myself that I would leave him alone, yet my feet dragged me over to him. We didn’t talk much at all and I don't know whether it went well or not. I asked him if he was doing alright and he told me to get off his back. Like last time I told him that I’m still willing to listen if he wants to talk. And like an unshakeable habit, I placed my hand on his shoulder before leaving him.

I’m almost positive that nothing is going to change, but at least I tried. I make it back to class with time to spare before lunch. I notice that Ayato is gone, but I don’t give it much thought. I sit down in my seat and take out my book.

Yui was right, I am very addicted to this book. I don't know, but something about it makes it so I never want to put it down. I only have a few more chapter to go, and I want to finish it so I can talk to Shuu. After dinner yesterday, he said that he wanted to know my thought about the ending. This gave me the impression that he’s read the book.

After dinner though, Reiji announced that we will no longer be having two meals a day. He said we will have dinner every Monday for some time before that too will be revoked from our schedules. Knowing that I’m no longer going to be seeing Shuu outside of school sadness me a bit. Yeah, we live with each other and everything, but we don't see each other all too often. We both like to stay in our rooms. Know that our already short time together has dwindled, I want to start and come up with excuses to see him. There isn’t really a reason for us to see each other, so me just popping up will look bad. This will make the others begin to question my action and suspect something was up. Even just seeing Shuu and having no verbal interaction is fine with me, I just want to be in his presence.

Being so deep in thought, I didn't realize that the chimes had already sounded and everyone was leaving the room. It took a hand on my back to snap me out of my deep thought. The sudden contacts frightened me and I ended up jumping out of my seat and knocking over my chair.

“Woah,” Haru says, putting his hands up in defense. “Sorry for frightening you, Hikari.”

I look at him and nod meekly. I look around and take in the nearly vacant room. Relief fills me when I notice that Haru and Keita were the only ones that saw my embarrassing act. “Oh, it's just you, Haru,” I say with a sigh.

“Just me,” he echoes with a smile, “That hurts.” He puts his hand to his chest like he was hit in the heart my by cold words.

“Sorry,” I say picking up my bag.

“It's fine. Hey, we wanted to know if you’re free for lunch.”

I look over at Keita who smiles at me shyly.

“I would, but I’m learning a new piano piece this week, I don’t want to miss a day.”

Haru nods in understandment. “Yeah, I gotcha.”

“But maybe we can hang out during free period, I usually don’t do anything but work or read.”

“That sounds cool,” Keita says, getting off of the desk he was sitting on.

I walk to the door and leave the duo behind. I make my way to the music room. I’m feel the excitement inside me bubble and I feel as if I can’t suppress the overpowering emotion. I try to calm myself once I reach the door, but I feel as if this energy can only get out if I play.

I open the door to see Shuu standing by the shelf. He turns around to look at me. I smile warmly at as I make my way to the bench. The sheet was there like last time, and I look it over again.

“Hello, Shuu,” I say. I notice that the bench is different from yesterday, no doubt he was playing. I wish he would play for me sometimes, but I know it isn't going to happen anytime soon. I sigh and adjust the seat.

“Hey,” he greets back. I try to hide the surprised look on my face from his greeting. He usually doesn’t respond to my greeting with anything more than a grunt.

“Before we start this lesson, may I play something?” I ask him. He looks back over to me with a questioning look. “The thing is that I’m not in the mood to play the song we’ve been teaching me. I’m a bit too… excited to play such a toned down piece. Like you figured out, I play what I feel.”

_And right now I’m feeling uncontrollable excitement like electricity is being pumped into me every second. I can probably run three kilometers or sing the longest song known to man. Why am I so happy you ask, well, I don’t even know!_

“Very well,” he says with his signature sigh.

I ready my hands on the keys trying to calm them as they slightly shake with joy. “It isn’t classical,” I warn, but he says nothing in response. He just look over at me as he leans against the shelf. I begin to play the joyous song. The tune is bubbly and happy all over. The song is simple yet very filling. I feel my happiness and excitement being mirrored into the tone of the song. I undoubtedly smile like a fool throughout the whole piece.

Unconsciously, I begin humming along with the piece, it's almost impossible not to. The song just makes you want to sing out. My fingers glide gracefully over the keys as I finish up the piece. I let out a breath as I press the final key.

“That was a nice piece,” Shuu says. I was so engrossed in the piece I didn’t see him pull up the stool and was sitting on it.

“Thank you,” I say. “Thought you wouldn’t like it because it isn’t classical.”

“I never said I only like one genre.”

“You sort of gave off the impression,” I counter under my breath. “Anyways, let's get started on the piece.” I stare down hard at the paper in front of me, looking at the notes that desire to be played.

Shuu instructs me on the part where I, and I quote, ‘complete butchered the master piece’. With his guidance I fix three section I was messing up. Throughout the lesson the vampire would stop to give me a remark that I wasn’t able to tell if it was him being cold or kind.

Before I know it, the chimes are sounding and my time here is over. I want to stay here just a few minutes longer, to go through the piece one last time, to remember the areas I’m still messing up on, to be in this room with Shuu for just a bit longer.

“Why does it feel like time passes faster when I’m in here,” I mutter to myself.

“Time seems to vanish when you do what you love,” Shuu says. He has his back against a leg of the piano and his eyes. I nod to him, although he doesn’t see it. I wonder if he feels the same way about this room as I do.

I turn around to face away from the piano and stand. As I rise to my feet, I feel a sharp in my lower abdomen. I hiss in pain and fall to my knees. I grab my lower stomach with my right hand and use my left to keep me from falling onto my face. I draw a breath in between my teeth as I feel my insides flare in pain. It feels as if someone just stabbed a dozen knives through my abdomen.

“What the hell?” I hear a voice say, but it sound so odd I’m not quite sure I know who it belongs to. A hand touches my back and I look up to see Shuu.

But it doesn’t look himself at all.

Sapphire eyes that are usually close are now wide open, staring down at me with concern. His brow is knitted together in confusion and his hand is stern on my back. “What happened, are you hurt?” His voice is filled with more concern that I thought was possible for the vampire.

I try to take a breath, but the stabbing feeling only increased. “Shit,” is all I’m able to say as I feel the pain coursing through my body. Fuck, why is this happening now, out of all times? I bite my lip to prevent a whimper of pain.

I feel sweat begin to form on my brow and I'm about to start hyperventilating. _Breathe, Hikari, breathe. Remember what the doctors told you, just steady your breathing._ Suddenly, two arms pick me up. Shuu carries me to the couch on the other side of the room. He lays me down on my stomach.

“My...bag..” I’m about to breath out to Shuu. He looks confused at first but gets my bag in mere seconds. Gritting my teeth, I instruct him on what to do. “Get out my…water...and pouch.”

Much calmer now, Shuu digs in my bags and get out the water bottle and a small pouch contain my medicine. He turns me over softly, although I still feel the stabbing feeling. Lifting my head, he slides the containment of the pouch into my mouth and gives me a few sips of water.

I smile weakly at him, mentally thanking him for his help. I begin to take deep inhales of breath, holding them three seconds and letting them out.

I grab the pillow from off the floor and place it on my abdomen, apply pressure to the pained area. I feel my head haze and pain seems to be the main focus of my thought. I begin to think of something to take my mind off the main. Recite the English alphabet backwards, count backwards from a thousand by seven, name all of Beethoven’s works.

I feel a hand take my own. Not even caring who it belongs to, I squeezed it tightly. The hand is a bigger than mine and maybe even softer. The limb is surprisingly warm.  I hope who ever this hand belongs to doesn’t mind my sweaty one.

Although it feels like hours I stay in this state of agony, I feel the pain start to numb and my breath coming out in a more normal pattern. I open my eyes that were clenched closed throughout the whole ordeal. I see stars and color before my vision clears. The pain is still there, but it's more subtle. I look over to see Shuu staring at me with worried eyes.

“I’m fine,” I say in a weak voice.

“No, you’re not,” he says sternly. He lets go of my hand and stands up. “I’m getting Reiji, we’re going home.”

“Shuu,” I say, but he is already gone. I stare down at my hand, the one Shuu held, my fingers already feeling cold form the disappearance of warmth. His warmth

* * *

Even with the throbbing pain in my abdomen, I should change my clothes. Shuu demands that I stay in bed, but I don’t feel like getting under my covers in my school uniform. I don’t want to burden him anymore by asking him to help me change, so I waited for him to leave my room before changing.

After removing my outer clothing, I go over to my wardrobe and dig in my drawers for clothes. The pain is much more bearable than earlier, so it is easier to move about. Besides, I have been much worse in life. I slide on a blue t-shirt and proceed on putting on my snowflake pajama pants.

My left foot is in the pants leg when my door opens and Shuu walks in. He’s eyes fall onto me and there is a moment of awkward staring. He averts his gaze and puts the glass of water he was holding on my nightstand. I’m putting the other leg in when he says, “You should really be resting.”

“I’m going to,” I say. “I just wanted to change first.”

“You could ha-”

“It’s fine... I’m fine,” I tell him for the millionth time. I bet the universe wants to prove me wrong today, because I hiss in pain when I pull my pants up to my waist. He give me an ‘I told you so’ look and I roll my eyes. I know that I should be grateful for his help, but it just seems so odd getting kindness from him like this.

I walk over and sit on my bed, knowing this will make him happy. I grab the cup and take a sip from the cool liquid. I look over at the vampire. Not only did he make sure I was home in half the time it usually takes to get here from school, but he also insisted on carrying me all the way up to my room. “Shuu, than you for everything. But I’m fine, I’m sorry to worry you. I know this may sound odd, but this isn’t out of the blue. This happens every so often, trust me.”

He doesn’t respond. He simply leaves the room with only a small glance back at me. I stay still in the quietness of my room for a few minutes trying to wrap my head around the events of earlier. I had a ‘disturbance’- as the doctors called it- early than usual, although I should have expected that.

This one was significantly more painful than the others, but that is surely because I haven’t been taking my medication. I’ve looked just about everywhere for it, but it is still MIA. I slide off of my bed, hoping Shuu doesn't hear and come in thinking I just fell out of something.

I make my way to the bathroom, and, like I did a few times already, fully empty the cabinets looking for my pill bottle. Medical supplies, toiletries, and other stuff, but no bottle. I leave the bathroom and go to my room. I search all of the drawers and my wardrobe to no avail. I get on my hand and knees, my abdomen still throbbing, and search the floor for my medication.

I feel under my wardrobe, nightstand, and bed, but my fingers only graze the carpet. I full lay myself on my stomach and reach under my bed one last time. This time, I feel some kind of fabric touch the tip of my fingers. It takes me a moment to remember it was my duffle bag. With a smile of glee and wince of pain, I retrieve my bag from under my bed,

I open it and search through my bag. Finally, I feel the container and take it out. I want to laugh at how stupid I am for not thinking about my bag earlier. Before stuffing it back under, I see light being reflected from my bag. A bit of curiosity sparkled in me and investigate. There is an inner pouch of the bag I don’t remember. I open in to see something that I long forgotten about.

I take out the framed picture and hold it in my hands. In a black frame is a crumbled picture of Natsume, Kaname, my piano teacher, and me on my fifteenth birthday. My long brown hair is in a high ponytail and I have a white headband with a purple flower on it. I wear and amethyst color high-low dress and smile warmly at the camera. To my right is my piano teacher, smiling softly, a very rare scene. To the far left is Kaname and between him and me is none other than Natsume. His fingers laced with mine.

The picture was taken only months before the accident, although the time between the two evens feels like a lifetime. I stare down at our faces, feeling the memories and sorrow coming back to me. Instead of throwing away the picture, I kept it though my long recover and after. And I doubt I can end the streak now. Leaving my bag on the floor and I walk over to my nightstand and place the picture in one of the drawers. Although I don’t want to see it, and I don't want anyone else to, knowing that’s here makes me feel different.

After closing the drawer, I get my pills from the floor and sit on my bed once more. I place my hand on my abdomen and look at the pill bottle. All this pain and suffering because of that boy I’m holding hands with in the picture. So why, why do I feel like it would be taboo to forget the time with him? Why can't I completely remove him from my memory and life?

 


	27. Jealous

**Subaru's POV**

 

I walk the halls of the school that lead towards the exit. All I want to do is leaves this damn hellhole. I don't even know why that bastard Reiji makes us come here. If he wants to spend his days surrounded by pointless test, stupid classes, and annoying people, be my fucking guest. But if you want to drag me into it, then we have a problem. I don't belong here, and I hate being here. 

 

As I walk down the halls, the other students fall silent and move to the side, giving me a clear path. This is only my first year here and people think I will kill them if the touch me. 

 

But I'm not denying the rumor. 

 

I don't want to associate myself with these stupid humans. The less they come in contact with me, the better. Especially all the stupid girls. Always rambling about their problems and gossiping. They flirt shamelessly with other students. Females are stupid and only feel greed and lust. 

 

But there's one girl that I'm okay with. She doesn't try to flirt with me or anything, she just want to be friends. Even if I give her the cold shoulder, or don’t sugar coat stuff, she sticks by me. And now she’s completely avoiding me. 

 

“Do you know where Hikari is?” I hear a voice say as I walk out of the building and into the coolness of the night. I look up to see Yui. Her voice is a mix of lightness and worries. Her eyes look behind Laito, who I guess she was asking, frantically searching for her sister.

 

“She wasn’t in homeroom before dismissal,” she explains to my half brother. I don’t think she even noticed my presence. That, or she’s still avoiding eye contact. 

 

“Now that you mention it, Hikari wasn’t in Home Ed today,” Kanato says meekly beside her, as he hugs his Teddy tight.

 

“Maybe that idiot fell asleep somewhere, again,” Ayato suggested.

 

I roll my eyes at them. Hikari this, Hikari that, why the hell does everything revolve around that bitch? I could care less if she was abducted by some random pervert and being sold on the black market as we speak. The amount of concern and attention that whore is given disgusts me. She is the equivalent to livestock, not a damn princess.

 

“Shuu is probably passed out somewhere also,” Latio says with a sigh. “Reiji is going to be very upset with those two. All I wanted to do today is relax, but know he’s probably going to give us some kind of lecture about being on time or something.” He places his hand on his head dramatically, like the drama queen he is. 

 

Almost as if he was summoned by name, the bastard Reiji comes walking out of the building towards us. He looks pissed off and indeed of a cup of tea, his usual remedy for calming down. He once tried to persuade me to try it, and fucking stupid attempt if anything.

 

“Why haven’t any of you gotten into the vehicle yet?” he question us.

 

“We were waiting for Melons and Sleeptard,” Ayato says sarcastically.  

 

“They are already at the manor. Some... issues came up and they left about an hour and a half ago.” The statement peeks my interest slightly as well as the others.

 

“What happened to Hikari?” Yui says, her concern almost palpable. 

 

“You can ask them about it when we get to the manor,” Reiji says, deflecting the question.

 

We all get into the limo and pull out of the school’s gates. I look over at Yui, who gazes out the window, drumming her fingers on her lamp frantically. She doesn’t look at me or anyone for the matter, she just keeps her eyes on the starry sky.

 

I know that whatever is happening between is stupid and petty, but I don’t know how the fuck I’m supposed to fix this shit! I never had a problem like this. Before Yui, no one would talk to me and I didn’t talk to any else. Not my teachers, classmates, or even the other brides; I didn’t want to associate myself with any them. I wasn’t even loved by my own parents and my brothers are all bastards- well, all but Shuu.

 

But when Yui came, she completely flipped my world around. She talks to be when everyone goes silent. She finds me when I’m lonely. She is the only person that doesn’t urk my nerves and try to piss me off. I decided to tell her stuff, open up the slightest to her. She was the first girl- person in general- I trusted in years. 

 

She took the trust and cared for it for some time, but then completely destroyed it. I don’t know if I was overreacting last week or anything, but she was far out of line. And when she wanted to talk about it, she completely dismissed the extremely important conversation to talk about her sister. I came to try and get the thought of her running away out of my mind and she wants to bring up shit about Hikari, what the hell!

 

Everything was fine before she came, but now it seems as if the whole planet is screwed over because of Hikari. She comes out of nowhere, too. I don’t know about the triplets, but I’m not buying this ‘back up bride’ bullshit. I would have long done something to her if she wasn’t Yui’s precious sister. The last thing I wanted was for Yui to get mad at me because of something I did to Hikari, bit I guess that is already fucked up.

 

I don't know if Yui is as clueless as I am about this situation or she is completely avoiding it. If the latter is correct, then I completely fucked up. Yui is the only person that I truly care about and I don’t want to lose her.

I have a feeling that she is sending Hikari to talk to me to see what she could get. If that is the case, then I’ve lost my respect for the blonde. Sending her sister, the source of all the problems that have occurred over the past few weeks, to talk to me is utter bullshit.

 

Being Yui’s sister, I have to force myself to be kind to Hikari. I can’t threaten her when she bothers me or twist her arm when she puts her hands on me. I just have to endure it until she leaves me alone. Stubbornness must run in their blood.

 

We arrive at the manor and the vehicle is parked in front of the entrance. Yui practically flies out of the car and towards the door. The blonde locks flow behind her and her legs skip up the stair, barely touching them.

 

With a sigh, I exit the limo and frown.  _ Why was I given such a person just to not know what to do with her? _

  
  


_____________

 

**Yui’s POV**

 

I don't bother knocking on my sister’s door, my worry for her far surpasses that of my manners at the current moment. When I open the door, I see her sitting up in bed, hands raised over her lap, fingers stretched out. She looks at me with a questioning look. I must look odd, I'm breathing heavily, my blazer is half off one shoulder and I'm clenching the doorknob so hard my knuckles are white. 

 

“Uh… welcome home, Yui,” Hikari greets with an awkward smile. I walk over to her and sit down on the bed near her knees. 

 

“Hi,” I say as calmly as I can. I search her over for any wounds, but I see nothing wrong with my sister physical. 

 

I'm about to question Hikari, but she puts her hand up in protest. “I know we're about to play a game of twenty questions, so instead I'm just going to tell you what happened,” she says calmly. I nod my head and she does so in return.

 

“I was in the music room,” she begins. “It was like all the other days for the most part. Right before Home Ed, though, I had a ‘disturbance’. And I know you're probably thinking, ‘But, Hikari, what's a disturbance?’ I will tell, it is basically a few minutes of hell I have to endure every so often before I get my period. I know it sounds weird, but it's because of some medical shit I rather not talk about. It usually isn't as bad as the one I had today, but that’s because I wasn't taking my medication. That and…other things.”

 

I nod my head slowly trying to take in the knowledge I acquired. She is having cramps times a hundred because she wasn't taking medication. It's not that unbelievable, she was discharged from the hospital about two months ago, it shouldn't be so strange for her to have problems like this. 

 

I leave the room to give my sister some peace, wanting her to rest as much as possible. I make my way to my own room so I can do my homework that I have yet to complete.

 

I have a feeling to go ask Shuu for his side of the story, but I decided he rather not be disturbed after whatever happened earlier today.

 

I open my bedroom door and expect to walk into an empty room, but instead there's someone in here. 

 

Ayato sits on the chair near my bed, limbs draped over the seat as if he was lifeless. He turns his head towards me with a smirk.  "There you are Pancakes, I thought you were going to take forever."

 

"What are you doing in here?" I ask, not trying to show how uneasy his presence makes me feel. He gets off the chair and walks towards me with the wicked grin he wears when he starts having mischievous thoughts. 

 

"This is Yours Truly's house, Pancakes, so you better fix yourself. I can be wherever I want, whenever I want. That includes your room.” His take a step closer to me and I back up slightly but my back hits the wall. I put my hands up in defense, but he grabs them with his own. 

 

He whispers into my ear, “It's not fair that Laito gets all the fun. I deserve some too.” With that, he bites down into my neck. I clench my jaw as I feel his fangs sink into my neck, draining me of my blood. I struggle to get out of his grip, but the pain only intensifies with my movement. 

 

He releases me from his bite just to say, “I still love the taste of your blood. It's so much better than Hikari’s.” His teeth the sink down into my shoulder and I whimper again as I feel my skin flare in pain. My eyes begin to water and my knees go weak. 

 

He licks my wounds with his signature smirk. “See you later, Pancakes. I would stay longer, but Laito is being a prick and would kill me if I screw things up.”

 

“Wait...what?” I question, utterly confused, but he disappears from my room. I slide against the wall onto the floor as I compose myself from the events of a minute ago. I hate when he gives me these hints about things he knows he wont give me the answer to. I try not to dwell on it. After collecting my nerves back, I make my way to my bed and rub my neck slightly where Ayato bit it. 

 

\----

 

My stomach growls, telling me it's about time to stop the homework and get something in me before I hit the sack for the night. Closing my notebooks and putting my stuff away, I begin to think of what to make for dinner.  Whatever I do prepare, I should make enough for me and Hikari both because she's probably not going to be able to get up and make food for tonight. I do find it kind of bothersome that we have to make our own meals from now on, but I shouldn’t complain.

 

I walk into the dining room and surprised by a delicious scent coming from the kitchen. I don’t know who’s cooking because Reiji nor any of the familiars should be in the kitchen at this point in time. I open the door to the kitchen to see my sister by the stove cooking some meat that must be making a delicious smell. 

 

“Hikari what are you doing on the bed?” I exclaimed staring at my sister. She looks over at me with the smile and the presses down to meet with the spatula.

 

“Making dinner, silly,” she says nonchalantly. “What else would I be doing?”

 

“Resting like you should be after whatever happened today,” I counter and walk over to her. “Let me take over whatever you're making.”

 

“One: I'm fine, just because I have cramps-” I roll my eyes at her understanding- “doesn't mean I can't function. Yeah, It hurts at first, over time it gets better. I know this has been the most painful one, but that doesn't mean I can't get stuff done. I've told you, I've been through much, much worse. Two: do you not know what a hamburger is? We’re making our own food now, might as well enjoy it. Besides, it's been forever since I had a burger.”

 

I shake my head at my sister who should still be resting. “I don’t think you're some delicate little flower, I know you're not. It's best to take things easy for now, though. You said this was your most painful one you don't know what else can happen.”

 

She rolls her eyes at me and pushes me away from the stove. “It's all right. I get it, just...just calm down, okay? I'm fine, I promise. Now I'm gonna finish making the burgers and we can have dinner here in the kitchen. I don’t feel like setting the table. Besides, it's nothing fancy, just burgers. We can eat here at the island. So just sit down for now.”

 

I nod my head meekly at my sister and sit down on one of the island stool as I watch her press down on the meat that sizzles on the hot plate. I stare at the back of her head, wondering what is going inside of it. Why is she so persistent with things? Something could have happened to her in here and no one would have been with her. The thought of her going through anything like by herself is too frightening to think of. Hikari must be grateful that Shuu was there. If he wasn't, who knows what would have happened. 

 

“How are things with Shuu?” I ask her. I see her stiffen slightly and her fingers twitch, no doubt want to tug at her hair.

 

“W-What do you mean by that? There nothing that could happen,” she stutters.

 

“But don’t you have that hour in the music room with each other every day?” I tease slightly.

 

“Didn’t I tell you that I’m not doing all of this ‘falling in love’ stuff? I won't love again and the feeling will pass. I like being in the room and playing, that has nothing to do with Shuu. He is rude and very lazy and can be as pervert as Laito sometimes.”

 

I cock my head to the side, is she serious? Is that how she actually feels about him now? There’s no way she has only negative feeling towards him. To me, she’s like Subaru, a total tsundere. 

 

Hikari puts that patties on buns that were near the stove. Turning off the hot plate, she carries that plates over to the island and places one in front of me.

 

“There you go, eat up,” she says with a smile as she puts her plate in front of her. She bites into the sandwich and chew slowly. I copy my sister and bite the burger. My taste buds burst as I savor the delicious combination of meat, bread, and vegetables. I chew and I swear I almost melt.

 

“Did you just moan over a burger,” my sister says, compete dumbfounded. “So you were serious about never having one, wow. What a sad life you must have lived for the past few years.”

 

I punch her slightly with a small laugh. “Oh, be quiet. You didn’t have one until you live with the Keis. If it wasn’t for them, you probably wouldn’t have had one up until now also.” I see the look of dejection cross her faces once the words leave my mouth. She lets out a quiet ‘yeah’ before biting back into the sandwich. “Oh, I’m sorry.”

 

She waves her hand in dismissal as she chews her food. “It's fine.” She takes another huge bite of her meal. After a long moment of silence she says, “If you are ever curious about my old life, you can ask. Being able to talk freely about it means that I have moved on.”

 

“Yeah,” I say unsurely.

 

“I have a question for you, though”

 

“Hm?”

 

“How are things between you and Subaru?”

 

I stop chewing and glaze over at my sister. She notices my hesitance and I look over. “Uh.. fine, I guess. Nothing has happened, you know, ‘relationship’ wise if that’s what you’re implying.”

 

“No, not like that. I mean, hmm, how should I put this? Whatever you guys are doing right now isn’t in the norm for you two.”

 

“It's...it's nothing. We just need some space from one another, you know. Our lives don’t revolve around each other.”

 

She nods her head slowly. “I see, so you guys got in a fight.”

 

“EH?!” I exclaim, my face flushing. She found out, oh god no.

 

“You can try and play this game, but just know that I was a player for a very long time.” She smirks and leans back slightly. “Yup, I fought with Natsume a lot, and I mean a lot; more than a fourteen-year-old fighting ‘these feeling’ usual would. I would argue with Natsume and always go running to Kaname. I always told him nothing happened, but he was no idiot. And I’ve learned from him. So tell me, what happened?”

 

I’m stunned that she not only figured out but is trying to solve it. I shake my head slowly at her. “No, really Hikari, it's nothing we can’t fix, I swear. It should be resolved before the end of the week.”

 

“That’s some time from now, Yui. You two were always so close, I don’t want some kind of divide between you two to get too thick to break down. Strike before the iron is completely cooled.”

 

I laugh at my sister. “You mean hot.”

 

“No, the iron is no longer hot. I’ve seen you two, this has been going on for some time now. I tried to talk to Subaru about it, but he’s fussy as ever. I know it's not my place to get into your business, but I wanted to help in some way.”

 

“Huh?” I question, trying to get a grasp on things. 

 

“Oh, I tried talking to Subaru to see if he was mad or anything. I wanted to know if there was a way for me to help.

 

That’s why she was talking to Subaru, she was just trying to help. What could they have possibly been talking about otherwise? I mentally slap myself for thinking that Hikari was doing something secretive behind my back _. It wouldn’t be the first time she’s done it, so it shouldn’t come as a surprise to question her. _ The thought seems so horrible to concerned, yet the logic behind it is there. 

 

Honestly, I’m probably just a bit jealous she was able to talk to Subaru. I thought I was the only person that he let near him, but now it seems as if Hikari has been granted the same privilege. Also, she is about to be with him when I can’t. 

 

“Oh, thank you for that, I appreciate it. I don't think you’re being nosy, but I think I can handle it from here. This is something I need to do on my own, please understand.”

 

“Yeah, no problem. I totally understand, justs make sure you make up.”

 

I nod my  head and we eat in a comfortable silence. My sister seems to be deep in thought as she eats, so I leave her in her own world. I also begin to think long and hard about how I'm going to resolve this pointless feud with Subaru.

 

___

 

**Subaru’s POV**

 

“Had a good tantrum?” Shuu asks with one open eye once I arrive at the stone structure. 

 

“Shut it, asshole,” I snap as I sit down on one of the stone benches. He shrugs his shoulders and closes his eye back. I lean against the wall with a sigh. I was taking a walk to calm myself, but my nerves were going crazy to break something. I’m never satisfied until I see something completely demolished. I ended up walking into the wooded area and punching a large rock until it broke into pebbles. 

 

I look down at my knuckles, almost fully healed from the abuse that was inflicted on it not ten minutes ago. I look over to my older brother, still resting peacefully. I don’t hate him like some of our other brothers. Shuu acts less of an asshole than the others and understands things that the others don’t think twice about. I can say he’s my favorite and we have some kind of connection we don’t have with any of the others.

 

“Why were you so mad?” he asks with a sigh of annoyance, almost like he doesn't want to ask but is compelled to.

 

“Nothing that matters to you,” I say with a groan. There’s no way for me to tell him that I’m feeling relentless hate towards the girl he’s obviously worried about. I don’t need Shuu killing for doing something to Hikari- alongside Yui of course. I have noticed some time ago that he’s been changing. He seems more opened and talks more than usual.

 

“Did something happen to you?” I ask looking out the doorway of the stone structure. The sky is becoming lighter and it's only a matter of time before we both have to be in the house.

 

“Like what?” he counters opening his eyes to look at me. I have long realized that this kind of conversation and reaction with Shuu only happened with me; barely anyone can hold a real conversation with him.

 

“You seem different, like something interesting finally happened to make you open your damn eyes.” He shrugs his shoulders and I narrow my eyes at him. “It’s Hikari, isn’t it?” I spit out.

 

He does react in any way and I sneer at my brother. After that bitch has made everyone's life so hard, he is softening because of her. What is there to even like about her? Then it dawns on me. “You’re pathetic if you are only interested by her because she looks like Sakura.”

 

“Shut the fuck up,” Shuu snaps with anger that came out of absolutely nowhere. “You don’t know what the hell you’re talking about, so keep that disgusting mouth of your closed. I don’t care if you’re being a jealous punk, but don’t you dare bring up Sakura. Ever!”

 

It has been ages since I’ve heard Shuu speak with so much spite, yet his words seem so cold. I mutter a ‘whatever’ to my brother as I get up from the bench. I leave him and head to the manor with my hands in my pocket. 

 

Why does everyone side with that bitch? She is nothing but a bothersome prick. I don’t know what the hell she is doing to everyone, but I'm not going to follow it mindlessly like the others. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I invions Yui and Subaru as an awkwardly cute couple. You know, the kind that wouldn’t know how to make up after their first fight or what to do if one of the finally confused. For a comparison for some, I think of them like Laxus and Freed (MY FAVORITE SHIP EVER!)
> 
>  
> 
> I'm sorry that Subaru's POV was short, there isn't anything for me to do with him yet, but I have things planned


	28. For Her

**Hikari’s POV**

 

Warmth.

 

All I feel is a strange warmth near me, almost blanketing me. Why am I so warm? I stripped off my shirt at some in the night, like I almost always do. The heat is never turned up very high, yet I still get hot every night. 

 

So what is making me so warm?  I stir a little not wanting to open my eyes and sleep leaves me. I roll over, away from whatever is giving off the waves of heat. 

 

Only after a moment does the coldness start to take effect and I have goosebumps spotting my arms. I recede back to the area where it's the warmest. I sigh as I feel the heat radiating towards me. Wanting more, I get closer. 

 

My body meets with the source of the heat, yet I  feel myself freeze. I feel someone's body against mine, their soft breath in my ear. The scent is odd but not bad, just undescribable. 

 

Now I'm sure I'm keeping my eyes closed. I don't want the first thing I see in the morning to be Laito or Ayato. Did I take one of them to bed? Why would I? Not only did having sex make my ‘disturbance’ worse, but I'm about to get my monthly. The thought of me having sex around this time utterly disgusts me. I told myself I'm no longer a sex maniac. 

 

What if I got drunk again? I don't have a pounding headache and I don't smell any strong alcohol. 

 

I'm about to move away when I feel an arm wrap around me. I'm enveloped by the male and there's no way from me to get out without waking them. 

 

A memory slowly crosses my mind. Most of the vampires all kind of cold. Only one doesn't have an icy touch. The memories of his arms over mine, his hand on my cheek, his breath in my ear. His warmth. 

 

I open one eye to see a shirtless Shuu sleeping in my bed, breathing slowly. I stare at his sleeping face. I've seen him lay around and his expression softens, but he was never really sleeping. This time, he is actually unconscious, he face peacefully. His sapphire blue eyes are shielded by his eyelids. His hair doesn't stick up in random directions like mines does in the morning. 

 

I don't want to wake him and the need to escape seemed to have died. Hesitantly, I cuddle into his chest. He's stomach lowers and raises only slightly and the rhythm of his breathing is soothing. He's asleep, shirtless and I'm cuddling him, also shirtless. 

 

The comfort he brings me is odd yet enjoyable and I find myself slipping into a light slumber alongside the sleeping vampire. 

 

* * *

 

I open my eyes when I realize my cherished warmth was gone. I look around and see Shuu sitting on the end of my bed. 

 

I rub the sleep from my eyes as he looks my way. “Mornin’,” he says with a sigh. 

 

I yawn and stretch my arms. “Good morning,” I reply trying not to act like him being in my room fazes me, which it does. I blink a few time and look out my window. “It isn't morning, though.”

 

“I know,” he says. “I just wanted to know if you'd notice.”

 

“Of course I would, the sun has already set.” The statement makes something in my head click into place. “We're going to be late for school!” 

 

“We're not going anywhere,” he says before I can get out of bed.

 

“Why not? Furthermore, why are you on my bed?”  I'm not going to tell him I knew he was in my bed, that would make things completely awkward. 

 

“You really don't remember.”

 

“Remember what?”  The last thing I can recall is having burgers with Yui. Déjà vu creeps in and I think that I might have actually had something to drink.

 

He sighs and says, “You passed out right after dinner. Blacked out right after leaving the kitchen.”

 

I stare at him as I take in the almost incredible news. “But I felt fine.”

 

“You obviously pushed yourself. You should have listened to either me or you sister. If you just stayed in bed, everything would have been fine.”

 

“I'm sorry to worry you,” I said,  What else could I say, I was being reckless and underestimated the potential side effects. 

 

“It was your sister that was panicking. I swear she almost had a heart attack seeing you on the floor unconscious. You should really be happy you have a sister like her.”

 

“Yeah,” I say softly. l look into my hands. She is pretty great and sometimes it feels like I don't deserve her. She is more like the older sister than me. She's always so level headed. She is is kind and sometimes I feel like I take advantage of it.

 

“Well since you're awake, and I can confirm that you're not dead, I will go.” Shuu begins to get up from my bed and I feel my body and emotions react suddenly as if I didn’t really have control over my own limbs.

 

“Wait, Shuu, don't leave,” I say surprising both of us. My eyes are wide, disparate even, and my arm is raised like I could grasp him and pull him back. I don’t want him to leave me. “Just...just stay with me for a bit longer, please.”

 

The vampire sighs and sits back on the bed. “Okay, well if I’m staying, at least put a shirt on.”

 

I try to keep my cheeks from turning pink as I realized I have yet to cover my torso. He throws me the shirt that I was wearing last night.

 

After pulling the shirt on over my head, I fall back down onto my fluffy pillows. We don’t speak but stay in a neutral silent. I don’t face him, I don't want to know if he is staring down at me or wearing his annoyed expression.

 

“What time is it?” I say finally breaking the silence.

 

“Almost nine, why?” he asked it with a sigh.

 

“I just needed to know,” I say. I don't tell him that I had to take my medication soon. I'm not going to bring that up, having to explain to him what happened yesterday was already embarrassing enough. No need to get him involved in anything else. I shift again, but I know that sleep with no long come to me.

 

“Are you hungry?” he ask. I don’t notice until he brought it up, but I feel quite hungry. I last ate around 7:30, so it has been more than twelve hours.

 

“Sort of,” I mumble in response. Not a second after replying to him do I feel the area of the bed Shuu was sitting on rise. I look up to see the vampire has disappeared. I shift again in my bed and feel a sting of pain from both my head and my wrist. I place my hand on my head only to notice my wrist.

 

It has the familiar bite marks that are left behind after the vampires bite me. I study the mark, wondering when I got it. From what Shuu told me and the events from earlier, I can guess that Shuu brought me to my room after I passed out. He probably stayed with me all night, too. At any point when I was sleeping, he could have taken advantage of my in any way. So I guess he bit me.

 

The thought actually makes me smile. So he isn’t going to try and kill himself again. The thought makes me happy and I no longer have to worry about him. I was actually going to ask him yesterday if he need any blood. 

 

I have long been relieved of the no biting pass Reiji gave me. Even though Kanato healed my wound, I never told Reiji. When he figured that out, he was upset with me. He invited me for tea, which I was totally terrified about. He ended up drugging my tea and taking my blood. 'Punishment' he said before kicking me out of his room.

 

I groan at the memory and bury my face into one of my pillows. My groan echoes off the wall of my room, making me feel lonely. It reminds me too much of my early days in the hospital. All I ever did was stay in a bed. After forever, the final let me leave my room and push me around in a wheelchair. 

 

Even though rehab and therapy were the definitions of frustrations I was able to go through them successfully; faster than anyone had predicted. But the days seemed to have dragged on and it was almost two months before I started to talk to other of the patients. It was hard at first because most of them were old people that were there for only a month or so. It wasn't a public hospital, so it was some time before other people came.

 

I remember those lonely days so clearly, and just reliving them for a moment is agonizing. I’m left alone with my thought that could wander anywhere, and it's sometimes hard to pull me back into reality.

 

“Did you fall back asleep?” Shuu says. I rise from my resting position to see the vampire standing by my nightstand with a tray. He sets it down on my nightstand and I peer down at it. There is a bowl of oatmeal and a glass of water. 

 

“Thanks,” I say in disbelief. I never expected him to make me anything. I thought he would probably bring me something small and leave. Instead, he sits in the chair by my bed with his arms crossed and his eyes closed.

 

I smile at him and get the bowl of oatmeal. I spoon out small spoonfuls of the oats and eat the slowly as they cool. Between spoons, I look over at the vampire, still surprise he’s acting so kind. I finish the food and begin to get out of bed.

 

“Where are you going?” he ask, not even opening his eyes.

 

“To the bathroom,” I say. He doesn’t move to help me and sigh in relief, I don’t want him to follow me in there. After finishing my business, I leave the bathroom, and sure enough, Shuu is still sitting on the chair. I don’t know if he’s staying because I asked him to or because he’s making sure I don’t leave my room. Either way, his presence is something I have gotten used to and enjoy in a way. 

 

Before getting in bed, I open my drawer and get out my pills. I make a mental note to put my pills in the top drawer so Shuu wouldn't see my picture frame if I open it again. I sit down on my bed and pop two pale pink pills in my mouth. After drinking them down with some water, I lay back down. 

 

* * *

 

**Shuu’s POV**

 

How could I be so stupid? I’m lecturing her about doing dumb things, yet I’m being just as stupid. Why didn’t I leave her last night? It was simple: bite her, leave, check in the morning to see if she’s still breathing. I set those guidelines so nothing would happen.

 

But the moment I removed her wrist from my bite and looked at her face, I knew I couldn’t simply leave her. Her brow frowned and she had an uneasy look on her face. 

 

Never had she affected me like that before. I did have urges when I changed her clothes. Seeing her wear the maid outfit did trigger my thoughts to wander. Her crying in the music room did make my heart ache slightly. But none of the feelings were as strong as the one I felt when I saw her troubled face. 

 

At first, I told myself that I would stay for a few minutes. But after about ten minutes and her no change in her facial expression, I thought she would stay like that all night. I was about to leave for good, but then she mumbled something. 

 

I stayed for a bit longer, which I thought was harmless. I woke up hours later to find Hikari and myself cuddling each other, both shirtless. 

 

It took me a lot of convincing  myself that nothing happened. I'm not sure why either one of us doesn't have a shirt on or why my arm was wrapped around Hikari. She was cuddled up next to me, her faces in the crook of my neck. 

 

I'm surprised she didn't wake up by the pounding of my heart. I was sure I laid down as far away as I could without falling off the queen size bed. 

 

Relief flooded me when I say her face, at ease, peaceful even. I didn't move immediately, I just stared at the human. I ran my fingers through her hair, the worse case of bedhead I've seen. 

 

My eyes traveled downward onto Hikari’s chest. She was wearing a simple white bra, with seem to almost glow against her olive skin. Even more so, her breast were pressed against my own chest. 

 

I moved away to the far side of the bed, gaining a better look at the female. Thankfully she still had the snowflake pants cover her lower half. I stared at her stomach, eyes carefully studying the several scars on her stomach. Spite rose in me in me when I thought if the horrible person that harmed her. 

 

I traced over the dead skin with my finger. I trailed my finger from scar to scar, wished I could erase them from her otherwise perfect body. My hand journeyed over to her bra. 

 

Without a second of hesitation, I slid my hand under her bra and cupped her left breast. Her skin was smooth and soft. I flicked my finger over her nipple slightly. I pinched the small flesh and I was surprised to hear a small moan escape her lips. The sound went straight from my ears and down to my groin.

 

I immediately jolted out of the bed after that, knowing I can’t go any further than that. Why I was acting so stupid, I do not know. I was shocked with my own actions. I got out of bed and threw on my shirt. Just like early, I was going to leave, but the sleeping human captivated me. I surprised myself by sitting on the end of the bed until the girl woke.

 

I keep up the streak of surprising myself by making her breakfast. I barely know my way around the kitchen, so preparing her a proper meal was a bit difficult. I was just going to get a familiar to do it, but I couldn’t find a damn one. 

 

I haven't been this kind to anyone in months. The last time I was kind, that I opened myself up, it ended worse than a nightmare. 

 

Subaru’s words from yesterday whisper from the back of my mind. Maybe I'm doing all this because I do want someone close to me, but it has nothing to do with her similarities to Sakura.  

 

Maybe this is all because of some sexual desire within me. And everything I'm doing isn't out of the kindness of my heart, but for a goal further in the future. 

 

Or, is this love. Ugh, now I sound stupid. I said long ago that I won't fall in love with anyone, especially a human. 

 

“Shuu?” she questions in a soft voice without moving to face me. She says it as if she isn't sure I'm still here. I wouldn't expect someone to still be in the room after three hours. Of course, I left a few time, but I kept coming back, for some reason. 

 

“Hm?”

 

“Can you play Chopin’s Nocturne in Eb?” I raise my eyebrow at her although she can't see it. “It's just, we would be playing around this time if we were at school. I just want to hear the piece, please.”

 

“Where is your CD player?” I ask, standing up from the chair.

 

Without moving to face me, she simply says, “Top drawer of my nightstand.”

 

I walk over to her nightstand and that music player is in its promised spot. The only other things in there was a folded piece of paper and the earphones I gave her. “The CD player works without the earphones?”

 

“Mmhmm,” she hums quietly. I close the drawer and look at the music player. I turn it one and start the song. It comes out quietly at first, but I turn the volume up to the max. Soon, the quiet room is filled with the piano melody.

 

Hikari lightly sighs and sits up. She outstretches her arms and finger and, with closed eyes, begin to move her limbs. I stare at her wondering what she’s doing. I then realize she is envisioning the piano and ‘playing’ it. I set the player down on her nightstand and watch her move her fingers over the imaginary keys.

 

A silly thing to do in my opinion, but she makes it look graceful. Her eyes stay closed and her face is calm, lacking her usual smile. My eyes don’t leave her for a second. I find myself wearing a smile in her place.

 

I stop the music player and she stays still. She opens her eyes and turn to me with a questioning look. “Did it die?” she ask, referring to the music player. Not waiting for my response, she moves over to the side of the bed to look at her music device. “There nothing wrong with it.” She looks up at me with her beautifully, pink eyes. “Is something wrong, Shuu?”

 

Not answering her, I swiftly pick her up.

 

“H-Hey, Shuu. Woah, Shuu, what are you doing!?” she ask in panic, trying to escape my hold.

 

“Be still,” I say calmly. “I’m taking you somewhere. I’m not allowing you to walk, so bare with it.”

 

She flushed slightly and nods her head meekly. Like the night she was drunk, she wrapped her arms around my neck to keep herself from falling. She doesn’t look at me as I carry her to the room, but I can see her cheeks growing pink. I keep my face emotionless, although my mind seems to be spinning.

 

What the hell am I even doing? For starters, I’m carrying her, what the hell? I’m also going to a room that I have locked up and told myself I would never open the door to. How does a simple request to listen to a CD escalate to this?

 

I walk down the stairs to the main floor and down a few hallways. Hikari turns her head so she can now see where we’re going. Although it's been months since coming down these halls, it feels like I was walking down them yesterday.

 

I get to the door and stare at the wooden barrier. I place my hand on the knob and turn. I know its locked and I don’t have the key, but I don’t bother to go and get it. I twist the knob until it breaks. The metal handle falls into my hand and I hear the one on the other side drop to the floor. I fell Hikari stiffen at my display of strength.

 

I open the door and gaze into the room as I take a step in. It's just how I left it all that time ago. There isn’t a speck of dust anywhere, courtesy of the familiars that clean every inch of this mansion. The beige walls look a bit darker than usual and the dark hardwood is as cold as ever. There is a gray couch against one of the walls that looks like the kind you would lay in during a therapy session; it is decorated with three pillows of various designs. Moonlight streams into the room through the window, curtains never replaced after my fit of rage long ago. The moonlight seems to be spotlighting the reason this room was lock up.

 

I sit Hikari down on the couch. “Shuu?” she questions lightly as if worried for my state of mind. I don’t show any reply as I walk to my own seat. I sit down on my bench and left the cover that conceals the piano keys, actions that I’ve done dozens of time. I feel emotions and memories begin to flood my mind. The hours I would sit here, either alone or accompanied.

 

I bite my lower lip, trying to block out the past and focus on the present. I’m in here with Hikari, for Hikari. I need forget about then and plan the now. With a sigh, I press each key, listening to the pitches that play out. 

 

I set my fingers on the starting keys and begin to press the keys. The piece starts off fast and the momentum is kept up throughout it. The feeling is strong and powerful. My fingers run across the board, pressing each key and quickly going to the next. I let my feeling of uneasiness, doubt, and confusion bleed out into the song. 

 

I feel myself becoming one with the instrument and the sound engulfs me. I’m no longer in a room which walls are stained with the dark colors of the past, but painted with the vivid hues of the here and now. My thoughts are vacant of everything negative as I play. I want these feeling of power and stretch to not only aid me emotionally but to support Hikari.

 

Just like the beginning, the song finishes strong. My shoulders fall as I exhale a sigh. I turn to see Hikari who is staring at me with a soft smile that reaches her sparkling, pink eyes.

 

“Why are you so cheeky?” I joke with a roll of my eyes.

 

She exhales through her noses to hide a laugh. “Nothing,” she said with the shake of her head. She reclines onto the sofa, laying her head on a pillow. She faces me and her smile grows wider. “Are you going to play another piece?”

 

I turn away and think of another piece to play for her. 

 

This continues for almost an hour and a half. I will play a piece and stop. We would say a few words after I finished, and then I would start back up. The pieces varied from length and genre, but I made sure to keep them all lively and strong. I didn’t want to damper the light atmosphere by playing something tragic. Why can’t moments like this last forever? Just two people in their own world, rejecting reality. 

 

Surprisingly, I actually really enjoying myself.

 

After my tenth piece, I cover the piano with a sigh. I have never played that long, and I can feel my arms ache only slightly. The feeling will completely vanish in a matter of minutes, but I think that’s it for now. I look over at Hikari who is sleeping on the couch.

 

I walk over to her and crouch down so we’re face to face. “You complain when I close my eyes during your playing, but you completely fall asleep during mines,” I complain to her, although she doesn’t seem like she is really sleeping, kind of on the edge of awareness and sleeping. “Hey, Hikari.”

 

Her eyes flutter open and she inhales through her nose. “Hmm?” she hums sleepily.

 

“I need to take you back to your room.”

 

She blanks at me as if she didn’t hear me. “Say it again,” she replies.

 

I roll my eyes at her and sigh. “I need t-”

 

“No,” she says cutting me off. “Say my name again.” I narrow my eyes at her and she stares at me blankly. “You’ve never said my name before, say it again.”

 

“Yes, I have,” I counter.

 

“Can you recall a time you did then?”

 

I try to remember when her name has left my lips. It is surprisingly hard to recall a time when I did say her name. I said when she was drunk, but she wouldn’t remember, so she’d probably say that I’m lying. The other time was long ago, and I doubt she’d remember that either. Other than that, I said it when she was either unconscious or not ear-range.

 

“You can’t,” she says. She looks me in the eyes and says, “say my name again, please, Shuu.”

 

I look into her pink eyes as the beg for me to say her name out loud. It's only a word, a title, so why does it feel weird to say it once I’m asked to? I try to act as if I’m not fazed by the request. “Hikari,” I say with a sigh.

 

She grins her award winning smile and outstretches her arms. I’m taken back from the action and stare at the human with confusion. Does she want me to hug her or something? If that’s the case, she is pushing this way too far. “Let’s go,” she says. “You’re still not letting me walk, so come on.”

 

I blink as I realize she was waiting for her to pick her up. I look away from her as I try not to redden as I mentally curse myself for the ridiculous thought. I run my hands through my hair, trying to play off the awkwardness inside me that I refuse to let show.

 

I pick her up and she wraps her arms around my neck. Her basically asking me to pick her up makes this feel a bit more awkward than before. She leans her head against my chest with a sigh. I carry her back to her room in silence.

 

Once I get there, I lay her on her bed. She fell asleep during the short trip and I roll my eyes at her. I cover her with the sheet and step back to inspect the brunette. 

 

She breathes softly and her face is calm. She doesn't mumble anything this time or try to roll off the bed. She looks almost heavenly asleep. 

 

I look over to her nightstand and spot the pill bottle. I pick it up and read the label. ‘May cause drowsiness, lightness in head, sleepiness…’ That must explain why she was acting so weird. There's no way that she was being so odd on her own accord. 

 

I place the bottle back on the nightstand and pick up the CD player. I make sure it's off and put it in the top draw. 

 

I remember seeing her take the bottle out of the bottom drawer. I open it to see an upside-down picture frame. The curiosity that I rarely have flickers a bit inside me. I pick up the picture holder and flip it over. The image I see is shocking. 

 

It's a picture of young Hikari, an elderly woman, and two boys. It takes me a moment to recognize the one to her left as the bastard Natsume. I feel the flicker of curiosity transform into a roaring fire of hate and disgust. What he did to Hikari was inhuman and I know if I see him again I will rip out his throat. I almost growl just seeing his face. I then notice that his hand his holding Hikari’s. It's not getting holding hers either, but their fingers are laced together. The sight sickens me from the bottom of my gut. I wonder what kind of relationship they had. Hikari doesn't tell ms much about her past. Other than that rant she went on last week, she didn't relieve much of her hidden past. 

 

Thinking about that rant made my eyes wander to the other male in the photo: Kaname, I assume. He smiles warmly and looks so carefree. So he's the one Hikari supposedly ‘killed’. 

 

I place the picture frame back in the drawer, face down. I place the pill bottle in it and stand up. My gaze falls onto the sleeping human. Never had I been so interested in a mere human. I lean over and tuck some of her brown strands of hair behind her ear. 

 

There was basic information on the file I was given about her. Unlike the ones for past brides’, I read this one. It was basic information and sufficient at the time, but know I feel as if it contained nothing. 

 

I know if I want to learn more about you past, I too have to share some of my own. It is rare for me to tell anything about my past, but I think I can manage to give a little. 

 

With a sigh, I walk to the door. I open it to see Yui a few steps away from the doorframe. She looks up at me in confusion, probably wondering why I was in there. “Shuu…?”

 

“She's sleeping right now,” I say and walk away with my hands in my pocket. I'm surprised I didn't hear or smell anyone coming back. I was probably thinking too hard to notice anything. 

 

I get to my room and fall onto my bed with a sigh. Taking care of someone else is tiresome and I feel the need to rest. Caring is so much effort, yet I seem to put up with it for her. 


	29. Reason

**Yui’s POV**

 

I walk up the stairs of the school, carrying the supplies for class my teacher asked for. The halls are empty, all the students in their classes. The only sound is my footsteps echoing off the wooden stairs. 

 

My thoughts wander, thinking of many different things. I can't stop thinking about yesterday. Not only was schooll strangely uneventful, but I arrived home just to be left with questions. After seeing Shuu exit Hikari's room, I was only left with my thoughts until my sister woke up. When I asked her what happened, she told me nothing, she thinks. The last part didn't help calm my raging thoughts. 

 

I was too constructed in my thoughts, I slip on a step and begin to fall backwards. I would have injured myself if I wasn't for a pair of arms catching me. I open my eyes to see Ayato. 

 

“Ayato,” I say softly. I pull myself out of his grip. “Thank you.”

 

“Watch what you're doing, Pancakes,” the vampire snaps. 

 

“Sorry.” I get down to pick up the supplies I dropped. When I reach down to get the items, the vampire grabs forearm tightly. He pulls it towards him, forcing me to shift my position. He pushes down my sleeve and without a second of hesitation bites down onto my forearm.

 

I flinch as his fangs sink into my skin. He sucks almost relentlessly, as if trying to draw ever drop of blood out of my arm. He releases his teeth and licks up the crusim liquid that began to bleed out.

 

“Ayato…” I say, but am cut off by him pushing me down onto the stairs. He yanks down my blazer and bites me on my shoulder. I let out a whimper, my shoulder and arm flaring with pain. He then removes his fangs and licks the wound and remaining blood. He puts his mouth right my my ear and whispers, “No matter what happens, you belong to me.” Then he vanishes.

 

I sit up, stunned by his sudden actions. What has gotten into him? The brothers bite me at random times, but this time was different. And his words won't leave me. It has been a while since he’s said anything about me being his. Even though he’s rude and demanding, I find myself slightly worried for him. He’s been acting different for a while now. 

 

I look down at my arm, the weird numbing feeling begin to set in. I sigh, knowing my white shirt is going to be stain on my shoulder and arm. I fix my clothing before anyone may come by, and collect the materials for class.

 

I get to the class and apologize for being late. I look to the back of the class, but Ayato isn’t here. As I make my way to my seat, I lock eyes with Hikari. “Where’s Ayato?” I mouth to my sister.

 

She shrugs her shoulder and then raises an eyebrow, as if questioning why I’m asking. I shake my head slightly in a never mind gestures and sit in my seat. Class finishes quickly, and soon the chimes are sounding for our dismissal. I glance at Ayato’s seat, still empty by the end of the period. I shrug it off, I shouldn’t be so concerned about him.

 

Hikari and I part ways with a wave and I head to the courtyard. I finally decided that it's about time to talk to Subaru. The childish manner we’ve been ignoring each other in need to end. I have no plan of action, courtesy of Hikari. When she woke yesterday, I asked her what she did once seeing Shuu after he bite her. She told me she had no clear pan, just a goal. She said making a plan can screw things up, because you'd never know what could happen. ‘Make your next step based on his reaction to the previous one,’ she said.

 

I take a few deep breathes as I make my way to the courtyard. I’m a corner away from the area where we always meet. I walk out and look over to our usual spot, ready to face the vampire.

 

But he isn’t there.

 

Confusion crosses my mind as I look at the empty area. Why isn’t he here? Even before I started talking to him, he always sat in that spot, he told me he didn’t feel like being anywhere else. I walk over to the short wall and look around the area of the courtyard. The red eyed vampire is nowhere to be seen. Maybe he’s just running late. I sit on the wall, waiting for the vampire.

 

Other students pass by, a few throw me a glance, but none linger. I open my bag and take out by bento. I eat slowly, waiting for Subaru to arrive. I stay there for about fifteen minutes, but he never comes. Maybe he’s doing something else, or he’s still avoiding me. I sigh, I got so worked up for nothing. 

 

I put away my half eaten lunch, the unsuccessful attempt making me lose my appetite. I grab my bag and head to the library. I enter the book filled room with no clear intention. I don’t really want a book and have nothing to research. I head to a table near the front and take out my homework. I start my math, but after a few minutes, my mind is drawing a blank. I’m can’t focus on anything, like I’m think about everything and nothing at the same time.

 

I put away my math work and begin to aimlessly walk down the rows or shelves. Two girls chat animatly to one another near the biography section and I think a boy is taking a nap in the corner. As I pass the female duo, one of them call out to me, “Excuse me.”

 

I turn around to face the girl. She is short and has dark brown hair that is braided into two, long pony tail. “Yes?” I answer, giving her my attention.

 

“You’re second year Yui Komori, right?”

 

“Yes, I am,” I say, giving them a small smile.

 

“I’m Yukino and she’s Ayame,” she points to the blonde next to her. “We’re first years.” Ayame nod her head at me with a smile. “We’re in the same class as Subaru.”

 

The name causes me to stomach to churn and I have to fight to keep my smile. What do they have to say about him? Not many people would dare look him in the eyes, much less speak about him without whispering.

 

“We were having a conversation, I’m not sure how, but he came up when us and several other friends were talking,” Yukino continues. “And we were wondering if either you or your sister are...with him.”

 

The question is so sudden, I’m physically taken back. What!? I know that others have noticed that I’m one of the only people that interact with him, but that doesn’t mean we are a thing. I’m not saying that I would mind, I do like him, but that’s not the point! There isn’t anything like that between us. Why would people even be talk about either of us?

 

“Hey,” I hear a voice say behind me. I turn to see a boy staring hard at the two girls. It take me a moment to recognize him as Keita. 

 

“Keita?” I say his name more like a question than a title.

 

“You two have no reason to be asking someone you don’t even know such a ppersonal question,” he says. “Just because she is able to talk to some that no one dares go near, don’t mean that have a relationship like that. Her and her sister just so happen to be living with the Sakamakis at the moment. Get to know someone before you interrogate them or get off her damn case.”

 

The girls mumble something and walk, giving us both a nasty glare before heading off. Keita and I both sigh at the same time. “Thank you, Keita,” I say softly to my rescuer.

 

He smiles down at me, “No problem, just helping.” he places his hand on the back of his head and lets out a nervous laugh. “I’m usually not like that, acting like that is Haru’s strong point.”

 

I smile at him softly. “I’m thankful that you did.”

 

“You okay?”

 

“Mhmm.”

 

“Okay then, I’ll be off then,” he gives a wave of his hand and turns around.

 

“Wait, Keita,” I say and he turn around and raises a brow. “Please don’t tell Hikari about this.”

 

“Uh, sure,” he says in response, a bit uneasy.

 

“Oh, and Akira’s aunt is getting married next week, offer to take her out shopping,” I say, remembering what his girlfriend told me yesterday.

 

He thanks me for the advice and leaves the library. I wait for a moment, trying to collect my scattered thoughts. What just happened was totally a shock and out of the blue. A few days ago people were talking about Laito and me, now some romance between Subaru and myself or Hikari. Again, it shouldn’t be so shocking that people of question my relationship, but how sudden the assumptions are traveling scares me a bit.

 

I mustn’t let these weird things get to me. they aren't true and everyone will realize it soon enough. I walk out of the library and begin to aimlessly wander the halls. I have nothing to do and no desire to go anywhere. My feet take me from hall to hall, but I feel as if I’m going no where. I suddenly stop in front of a door. I haven’t been here in a while, and the last time I was present, it was disastrous. There’s no reason for me to enter, yet a feeling deep inside me feels tells me I should.

 

Without hesitation, I open the door to the music room. It is still, silent, with no life in it. I spot the piano, remembering how Hikari and Shuu playing it with so much energy and passion. The keys are covered and the top is closed. I take a step into the room and walk to the bench. Lifting up the cover, I gaze down at the monochrom keys. I have little experience with the piano, but not enough to play a complex piece. I only know one, simple tune.

 

I place my fingers on the keys and begin to play the tune for ‘Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star’. It's been ages since I’ve heard the tune, one of my childhood songs. I press the same few keys repeatedly, but they’re all I need to feel my worries leave me.

 

I sigh once I finish the low leveled piece. Now I understand what Hikari means about this room. You’re by yourself and there’s no room for thoughts when you’re concentrated on the instrument at hand. I felt my tension unwind from just a simple tune. Imagining the bless she felt while playing a much more difficult prove causes me to state that the instrument in wonder.

 

“What are you doing in here?” a voice questions behind me. The sudden company scary me and I jump slightly. I turn to see Shuu on the couch at the end of the room. He stares hard at my, an expression I rarely see from the eldest vampire.

 

“Oh, Shuu,” I say, trying to calm myself. “I’m not quite sure.”

 

He sighs and gets off the sofa. It feels like time moves slowly as he shortens the space between us until the meters become mere inches. He stares hard and me, his hands in his pockets and leans down so we’re eye level. “Last time you were here, things went to hell. Unless you want to go there, I advice you should leave.”

 

My mouth is parted in shock due to his cold words. I nod my head, pick up my bag, and leave the music room without a second glance. I feel my heart beat slightly faster, and I try to calm myself. What was that? I know last time I opened that door, things ended badly, but I wasn’t going anything bad this time. Did he just not like me being there, or was it because I was playing the piano?

 

I shake my head, trying to get the thoughts out of my mind. I can't focus on stuff like that. From what I heard, the music room has been Shuu’s place ever since last year, it makes sense if he doesn’t want me in there. But his words words her so harsh and cold, as if they were being spoken out of pure frustration rather than announce.

 

I make it History as the chimes ring. I wait by the door as the students leave. I look down unconsciously, not nothing to look at the passing students. My head only snaps up when I hear someone call my name. I look up to see Hikari staring at me questioningly, but then her expression softens to a smile. I smile at her, but it soon disappears when I see Ayato appear behind her. He gives me a hard glare before turning and walking down the hall.

 

“You’re early for class,” my sister says, walking over to me. 

 

“Yeah, I didn’t have much going on today anyways,” I reply with a shrug. She shows no signs of worry or concern, so I’m assuming Keita didn’t tell her anything.

 

“No luck with Subaru?” I shake meekly. “Another time, don't worry. Well, I'm going to head to the music room, see you later.”

 

“Yeah, see you after school,” I say with a wave. I head into the classroom and sit in my usual seat. Little by little, students began to occupy the empty chair. Laito wakes in and smirks at me, but I turn away. Ever since our deal ended, he seems to be bothering me less, but hadn't completely stopped. The question of us being together pops back into my head, but I dismiss it as fast as it entered my mind. 

 

Class begin and seems to drag on and on, as if never to end. I take my notes like the other students and try not to look at Liato who is obviously trying to get my attention. The teacher’s monotonous voice turns into nothing but mumbles. My mind begins to wonder from the lesson as I begin to think of my evening meal I’m going to cook.

 

“Ms.Komori,” my teacher calls, dragging my back to class.

 

“Yes?” I say, becoming more alert.

 

“You have been called to the office,” she says, looking at the door as if indicating for me to go. I nod and get out of my seat. “Mr.Laito, may you accompany her.” The request makes me cringe slightly, but I don’t protest. I look over to Laito, who is rising out of his seat with a smirk. 

 

We leave the class and make our way to the office. “What did you, Bitch-chan?” the vampire coos, peering down at me.

 

“I didn't do anything,” I say. Even though my words sound confident, I’m not. A million things are going through my mind. I know I haven’t done anything wrong, so why would they want me to go to the office?

 

We get to the office and I open the door with a deep breath. “Hello?” I say, looking at the half a dozen staff members in the room.

 

One of them must have been the one that called me, because she is the first to greet me. “Ms.Komori?” she ask.

 

“Yes, I’m Yui Komori,” I answer. 

 

She looks at me in confusion. “Yui?” she says my name as if it's a question. I nod my head, a bit worried. She give me a sheepish smile. “I’m so sorry, darling, I meant to get your sister, Hikari.”

 

“Oh,” I say, a bit relieved, but its monetary. A new wave of anxiety washes over me. Now I’m more concerned of what they need with Hikari.

 

“I’m sorry for the mix up, darling,” she says apologetically. “You are free to go back to class.”

 

I nod my head, and walk out. Laito is still standing at the door away of the office where I left him. He raises a brow at me. “That was quick, suspension usually takes longer than that.”

 

“I’m not suspended,” I say, heading back down to classroom. He walks along side me, barely leaving any space between us. I glance at him from the corner of my eyes to see him staring at me mischievously. I look away, not wanting to look into his eyes.

 

We make it to History the moment the chimes sound. Before I can open the door, Laito grabs my arm. Time seems to move slowly, as if we are under water. I’m forced away from the door and towards the vampire. He’s right arms hooks over my waist, pushing my body onto his. He’s face lowers towards mine, and I feel something push against my lips. The second that I come under the realization that Laito’s lips have been place on my, the door to the classroom is opened. I’m frozen in shock as I hear gasp and murmurs, and I feel as if I can’t move.

 

He pulls away with a smirk, letting go of my left arm. He leans into my ear and whispers, “I will see you later, Bitch-chan.” He then walks down the hall to his next class. For a moment, everything is still, lifeless even. I don’t hear the murmurs or my teacher asking what’s going on in the hall. I don’t see the students whispering things, eying me oddly. I can only feel the lingering touch of his lips on mine.

 

I touch my hand to my lips, as if its my connection to reality, everything begins to come back to life. The students leave, throwing me glace of their shoulders. The bits of conversation begin to fill my ears. Everything is moving, yet I stay still, a few step away from the door.

 

What reason would Laito do something like that when he knows others will see? He was eying me all day, was he planning this, why? Does it have something to do with the readily Ayato was weird? I immediately wish to be swallowed up by the Earth.

 


	30. Rumors

“Did you hear about those second-year girls?”

 

“I heard that they live with the Sakamakis.”

 

“That’s nothing new.”

 

“I heard the Yui is dating Laito.”

 

“Didn’t they ditch History to make out somewhere?”

 

“My friend told me that she was with the scary one, you know, the delinquent.”

 

“Didn’t her sister steal him for her, I saw her talking to him this week.”

 

“But wasn’t up with her calling the other ‘Ayato-sama’?”

 

“I bet they just go from boy to boy”

 

“Lucky.”

 

“They sound like whores.”

 

“They probably are.”

 

Rumors and question drift among the students, the words on everyone's lips. It's not like they were never interested about the relationship between the Komori sisters and Sakamaki brothers, but no one dared to voice their assumptions. The kiss between Laito and Yui the other day was the final drop before stories and theories began to flood amongst the students. Nothing relatively interesting seems to have at the academy, so it was the something everyone could find interest in.

* * *

**Subaru’s POV**

 

The usual whisper and murmur today seem far from that. Everyone seems to be whispering in small groups, looking around as if searching for a threat. I roll my eyes at their display of stupidity. 

 

Eyes that would have normally never glance my way, seem to be almost glued to me at times. I send glares at the bothersome people that tick me off, and they quickly find something else to find interest in. I don’t like the way these lowly humans look at me as if I’m the filth that litters this world.

 

With my hands in my pockets, I make my way to the rooftop. I try to avoid going to the courtyard. Having Hikari know where I am everyday has started to bother me, and I refuse to to stay in my usual spot. The rooftop is fine and less crowded, so I make do with it.

 

The only downside is that Yui doesn’t know where I am. I highly doubt that she would come over and start talking with me like it was nothing, but I feel a bit guilty. I know that whatever is happening is dumb, but the knowledge on how to fix it is well out of my grasp. I can just talk to her, but I can see myself losing my temper again. I don’t care what happens to things around me or most people, but I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I physically hurt her. 

 

I groan as I make my way to the stairway that leads to the top of the building. I hate being in crowded areas. For one, I despise most humans and their foolish emotions. The other reason is because I have to act like one, which is disgraceful. I hate having to put myself on the same level as them. Most humans can’t suddenly disappear and reappear in a different area, something that was drilled into my head at a young age when I first had to surround myself amongst them. 

 

Yet sometimes, I feel as if I’m just as disgusting and ignorant as the humans are. I feel stupid and problematic emotions like them. I have to deal with my own drama, even if I try to stray away from it as much as possible. I cannot lie and say I do not feel emotions that I wish I didn’t have, like guilt, sadness, love.

 

_ Get a hold of yourself, Subaru. You’re sounding like some emo pansy _ . Once I’m at the stairway and I’m sure no one is around, I go to the top in the blank of an eye. I open the door to the roof and am greeted by a cool breeze. I inhale through my nose, letting the frosty air fill my lungs. No one is up here but me, just how I like it. Being left alone with my thoughts is something that can either end okay or with someone dying; both have happened. 

 

I walk over to the edge of the rooftop and sit against the fence that borders the area, the only object separating human from life and death. I reach into my back pocket and take out a small notebook with a pen secured in a strap to it. I open the book to the book and begin to write.

 

Something about me that if someone learned then I would have to kill them is that I enjoy writing. It is sissy thing, yet I feel as if the only person that ever understands what I’m feeling is myself. No one knows the pain that I’ve been through just to be ignored and bothered by others. 

 

It started out as one of Reiji’s stupid suggestion to calm me before I broke one of his damn tea sets. He has tried many thing for me, the most commitment any of my brother have given me. I was fourteen and had long given up trying to live by other’s rules and wants, but that bastard could give me the one thing he knew I lacked, attention. Not like I desperately desired it, but he was giving me attention I was rarely give at that point in my life. We tried everything he could think of, rhythmic breathing, exercising, talking, but nothing could keep my anger down. The only way I could have let it out was seeing something break by my own hands. He tried giving me a hobby also, but none peaked my interest. One day I need was infuriated with Ayato, so I went to go talk to Reiji. He told me he didn’t have time and just to write it down and discuss it with him later. Little did I know that simply writing it down made my anger simmer just the slightest bit. Now, it is a short lived escape from my anger and the world in general.

 

I don’t write sappy poems or shit like that, but just my raw thoughts and feeling. This isn’t my first notebook, I have about half a dozen at home. I almost killed Laito once for going through my stuff, almost discovering my belongs. I swear, if anyone found these, it would be the the second to last thing they’ see, my face before I kill the bastard being the last of course. 

 

I sigh as I tap the pencil against the pages of the book. I thought I was upset, the feeling won't leave my head, giving me no fuel to write anything. I slide the writing utensil back in its strap and flip to a random page in the book. I read over my jagged handwriting- my handwriting usually very rough when I’m angered.

 

‘The bastard Shuu has done nothing but sulk for the past few days. I don’t understand why he is acting like such a pussy. She’s gone, yet he feel as if he acts like the spoiled child he grew up as, she wil come back. WELL SHE WON’T! I HATE HOW PEOPLE LIKE HIM ACT LIKE THE WORLD IS OVER ONCE SOMEONE LIFE CHANGING HAPPENS! BE HAPPY THAT YOU GOT TO ENJOY IT, I NEVER HAD ANYTHING REMOTELY SIMILAR TO WHAT HE HAD! I can sympathise with him, because I also have to carry around the monumental amount of grief that comes with causing the death of someone close to you.’

 

I read over the entry, trying to remember what I was mentioning. I look at the corner of the page, checking the date I recorded my feeling. ‘March 24’. It's mid-October now, so that is about seven months ago. I try to think about what happened during this time, but the memory is just out of my grasp. ‘..causing the death of someone close to you.’ I know that I’m referring to my mother, but what about Shuu? Was it a bride? No, we rarely got close to- there was Sa-

 

The door to the rooftop swings open and two girl and a boy walk outside. One of the girls give out a shriek, saying that it's getting cold. The boy wraps his arms around her and whispers something in her ear. The other girl slaps the girl playfully, telling her to stop it. I roll my eyes at the disgusting scene displayed before me.

 

One of the girls spot me and nudge at the guy. He look at the girl and then at me. He motions the two females to the opposite side of the rooftop. 

 

I roll my eyes again, knowing that the once peaceful atmosphere is going to be polluted with their annoying chatters. I get up from my spot by the fence and walk over to the door to leave. There’s never a peaceful place in the integrity of this whole damned school, how is that even fucking logical? 

 

I swear, I rather be in class than just wandering aimlessly. I instantly feel pain in my heart as I remember the hour a day I would spend with Yui. I never really felt bothered or lonely during the minutes with her. As each second left, I felt as if a nerve of stress or anger would also. I feel as if it was ruined over a petty argument that could have totally been avoided. 

 

I walk sluggishly down the stairs with my hands in my pocket. This whole thing is so dumb, I swear I'm going to kill Reiji for making me suffer through this day to day bullshit. 

 

As I walk in the halls and the eyes are still on my. Focus on me, fingers in my direction. I feel the annoyance caused by all the stares begin to boil inside me. I gave the urge to yell at all this idiots, to tell them to get a fucking life and tell them I'm not a spectral. I know if I pull something like that, things will only be ease up for a little. 

 

The first rumor of me being a delinquent was triggered because I was unable to control my emotions. I was in my usual spot on the courtyard, reading a shitty novel for my class. Two punks I knew from class we hanging around there also. They were infamous for being the class idiots, doing the stupidest stuff that caused people laugh. They were acting dumb as usual and one of them ended up tripping and falling onto me. I shoved the bastard off, extremely pissed at him. He knocked my book to the ground, stepped in it, and ended up tearing out several pages of the book. By then I was infuriated, beyond the point to be calmed by writing in a book. I got up, ready to punch the dude in his fucking face. Before I could do anything, his friend grabbed my arm, telling me to chill. Of course I did the exact opposite and throw the bastard into the brick wall. The other, still on the ground after I pushed him, was stunned. I placed my foot on his chest and started pushing down, yelling at the moron for being a stumbling idiot. I had a bit of a rush at the moment, seeing the fool shaking under me, fearing I was going to break a rib or two. My heart rate picked up a bit and a wicked smile showed slightly across my lips. I’m sure I was going to do something else if it wasn’t for Shuu. I saw him out of the corner of my eye, leaning against an outer wall of the school building. His arms were crossed and he’s eyes were slightly narrowed at me. He looked down and give a small, disappointed shake of his head, and walked away. After my brother gave me that look, I felt as if it was all just stupidiness. I removed my foot from the moron’s chest and walk away with my hands in my pocket. Of course, about two dozen people say everything, and were all staring at me. Ever since that, I was the one to avoid around school. 

 

Honestly, it's not like I care, I don’t socialize with these idiots anyways. But the drastic shift of not  looking in my direction to trying to burn holes in me with their eyes is fucking annoying. I swear, I’m about to grab a random bastard by their collar and demand to be told what the hell is going on. I groan, I still have three more period before getting home. 

 

I walk down a less comain hall of the school building. There is only a few other students here, most of them preparing for their next class that will start soon. As I make my way to my own class, I hear something that catches my attention. I’m not the one to just talk to someone. But whatever they said is not something I could drop and not think about it.

 

I turn to the boy and girl, and they visibly stiffen as I lay my eyes upon them. The girl steps behind the boy and he looks at me as intimidating as he can.

 

“What did you just say?” I question the boy.

 

“W-What do you mean?” he says, trying to be strong although I haven’t threatened him, yet.

 

“Listen punk,” I say, leaning in closer to him, “I asked you a damn question. I doubt that answering it will hurt you, ironically, you should be prepared for pan if you don’t. Now I’m going to ask you one more time,” I punch the wall by his head, softly so the wall won't break, “what were you just talking about.”

 

The boy starts to shake and the girl cowers behind him. “W-W-We were j-j-just talking about a story that a second year told us.”

 

I stare hard at the student. He is testing me, and I feel my anger begin to peek. “Let me rephrase the question to help you, you stupid minded jackass.” I feel my hand begin to itch, begging to destroy something, maybe this boy’s face. My rushes through my veins and my eyes stare coldly at the boy. “Why the  _ hell  _ did Yui’s name leave that disgusting mouth of yours?”

 

* * *

 

“AAAAAGH!” I yell as I drill my fist into the tree trunk. The sound of wood splitting feels the night air, but I don’t hear it over the blood rushing through my ears. Splinters of wood fly out in every direction, a dozen or so piercing into my fist, but I don’t feel a single thing but anger. Birds fly from surrounding trees, but the only thing I can see is red. The anger that I have done my best to contain all day has been building up to a dangerous high. Even now, as I unleash my built anger on a random tree in the yard, I feel as if the frustration is just growing. 

 

I smash my other fist into the thick trunk after removing the first. The snapping of wood echos again and I let out a yell of frustration. Why the hell is this all happening, how did it come to this? I breathe heavily as I remove my fist from the abused planet. I shake the wood chips out of the hands, knowing that I’m not done yet.

 

I punch the tree again, in the same spot. How could she do this to me, how could Yui betray me like this? This is exactly why I don’t open up to people, because human are nothing but backstabbing, selfish, idiotic beings. I give her my time, my attention, my affection, and she does nothing but bury it in the ground. Why did I ever trust her, why did I think she was any different?

 

I feel the sick feeling of betrayal sink in my stomach, but I won't let it take over. I’m not going to sulk like some ninny, I knew this would happen. I knew she would leave me in one way or another. I feel the anger again and kick the tree, surprised I haven’t uprooted it yet. 

 

I’m mad and Yui for being nothing more than a backstabbing, bitch. I’m infuriated with Laito for being his usual self and fucking everything up. I’m enraged with myself for even letting myself get this deep. How could I let it go this far? I should have told her to go away the days she sat with me. I should have stayed silent when she asked me questions. I should have shouted when she smiled at me. I should have told her to get lost the day she found me.

  
  


But I didn’t.

 

I let her sit with me, I answered her questions, I rolled my eyes at her smiles, and I let her slower discover who I am.

 

I was being nice, but it just ended with me here and her with Laito. 

 

“AAAAAH!” I yell into the night sky, chest heaving, knuckles covered in blood. And for the first time in years, I feel a tear escape my eye. I feel used, betrayed, unloved. 

 

I feel hurt.

 

“Subaru?” a voice says. I look over to see a frightened Hikari staring at me. She is breathing heavily like she was running a marathon. Her eyes go from me to the tree and then back me. “Subaru, what the hell is going on? Are you punching the tree?”

 

At the moment, I feel my hatred towards the girl surface. The way she is in everyone's business, how she ruins everything. She can just waltz into my life, and help turn it to hell. “Get the hell away, you bitch.”

 

She is taken back from my words. She goes from look ready to bitch at me to calming herself. “Subaru, I don’t know why you’re doing this, but I don’t think it is safe.”

 

“Just leave me the fuck alone!”

  
  


“I’m just trying to help.”

 

“I don’t need you damn help!”

 

“What would Yui do if she saw you like this?”

 

The question brings on a whole new wave of pain and frustration. “She doesn’t give a shit about me! It's none of your damn business anyways, so leave me alone.”

 

“But she does care,” Hikari says, taking a step closer to me. “She does. I know you tw-”

 

“What the hell do you know!? She doesn’t give two fucks about me. If she did, why the hell is she on Laito.”

 

Hikari expression twists in confusion. Then she turns pale and I see her eyes widen in shock. “You know about that?”

 

“I don’t know why I believed it, but judging by your reaction, that punk was on point with that stupid rumor.”

 

“What are you talking abo- oh, those.” Realization seems to dawn on her and she give a sympathetic look. “Subaru, nothing like that is happening with Laito and Yui, how could you possibly think that? Well….” It seems as if she is going to say something, but trails off.

 

“Well what!” I yell. I know that she is going to say something, and she better not leave me in the dark about it.

 

“Subaru, just calm down,” she says putting her hands up.

 

“No! You’re going to tell me whatever the fuck you’re holding back. If you don’t, I promise I’m going to make it so you can never speak again!”

 

“I can get Yui, this isn’t really my plac-”

 

I slam my fist into the already abused tree trunk. “You’re going to tell me right the fuck now!”

 

She looks around nervously, biting her lip. She starts to mess with her hair and I swear I’m about to break her hand. “Yui and Laito aren’t in anything like a relationship, but...there was something between them for sometime.” I bet steam is visibly coming out of my ears. I stare at the brunette, eyes demanding she goes on. “They had a deal of some sort, Laito would stay away from me..and .Yui...would sleep with him.”

 

My eyes go wide at the statement.  _ THEY WHAT!? _ I feel every nerve in my body flame and even though my knuckle have started to have a numbing feeling as they feel, I still feel the itch to destroy something. 

 

“But it wasn’t like had feeling for him, although that sounds really bad,” Hikari tried to continue. “Bu-”

 

“SHUT THE FUCK YOU YOU WHORE!” I scream at her. “You are disgusting and despicable. You can’t stop yourself from fucking my brothers, and I don’t what you told Yui after that. But she slept with that bastard Laito for you, which is way too much for a whore like you. She is so nice to her, yet the only thing you do is ruin her life, EVERYONE’S LIFE! You come along and screw everything and everyone, why they hell are you even here?!”

 

I see her bite her lip and her eyes get glassy. “I didn’t mean to hurt her, or for any of that to happen, I swear! You really think that I wanted Yui to have sex with Laito? I already feel horrible about it-”

 

“You should!”

 

“And I do!” Tears begin to roll down her eyes. “I know I hurt her, I know I’ve done horrible things, but I’m trying to fix it.” She takes another step closer to me, and I curl my hands up into fist. “Like you said Subaru, when I hide stuff, lie about things, I began to dig my own grave. And one point, I dug it so deep I felt the flames of hell, and you know what? I learned from that. I know I hurt people, and I know I have to fix it all, but I don’t know how some time. I spent I most of my life with the same few dozen people, not having a single friend. Then, I was taken from my sister and stayed with only two people for two year. Hell, after that I stayed in a fucking cell for almost two years. Do you really think I know how to fix stuff like this? I don’t, but I still try. I try to make Yui happy, I try to help where I can, I try to be a better person. I can see that you’re upset with me, on both your own terms and for Yui.

 

“I’m sorry for upsetting you Subaru, I really am. I never knew you were so mad at me, and I don’t blame you. Like I said, I have done stupid stuff and I carry around the guilt, knowing that I can’t forgive myself, so I wouldn't be surprised if you find it hard or even impossible for you to. I doubt this,” she points at the tree, “started because of me though. So how about you go talk to Yui, you two straighten things out. You two had something, and I doubt it's worth whatever you're fighting over.”

 

I stare at Hikari. I look into her eyes, the one feature that is identical to one of Yui’s. I’ve gazed into these eyes dozens of time and I know what she means. I feel myself calm at her words. Why were Yui and I even fighting about, was it really worth us putting our connection in jeopardy? Could all of this been avoided if I just talked calmly with Yui? I look hard at the human. She’s right, this isn’t about her, no matter how much hatred is caused by her in the first place. This is all between Yui and me.

 

“I do-”

 

_ CRACK!  _ Hikari and I both hear a loud cracking sound. I look up to see of the branches for the tree loosely hang on. All of a sudden, there is a snapping sound, and the large branch begin to fall. I look at Hikari, whose head is upwards, staring at the descending limb, yet she doesn’t move. 

 

Not have a second to think, I launch myself towards her. Our bodies collide and I wrap my arms around her and tuck her head into my chest. I twist so my back is facing the ground. The moment my back hits the ground, the branch does also with a loud thud. 

 

I don’t know how long I laid on the ground with Hikari pressed against me. Honestly, I don’t know why I even saved her. Even after the countless thoughts of me wishing she wasn’t here, and dozens of words scribbled in my notebook about how much I hate her, I save her. Maybe it was the eyes that reminded me so much of her sister, or that I need to protect something the person I have affection for cares so much about. Whatever the reason, it caused me to save the girl that I have only thought as a bitch for so long.

 

“Subaru?” she says. Her calling me final snaps me out of my thought, and I let her go. She look at me and give me a wary smile. “Thank you for that.”

 

“Whatever,” I say, sitting up and staring at the tree branch. I look at the damaged tree for some time, letting the silence linger for a bit. “You have been a real bitch, but I will take your advice and just talk to Yui. Just know that I will probably never forgive you for hurting her.”

 

The second the words leave my mouth I hear a voice call out behind me. “Subaru, Hikari!” I turn to see Yui running towards us. She is breathing hard and rushing as if being chased. Her eyes are wide and lock with mine as she comes closer.

 

She stops about a meter away from Hikari and me. She place her hands on her knees, trying to catch her breath, “Wh...what are you doing...and what i..in the world is going on?” she ask between breaths.

 

Hikari look at me and stands. She dusted off my black slacks and looks at he sister. “Not much. This lovely person,” look gestured towards me and I scowl at her, “has some things on his mind that you must discuss. I’m going to leave so you have total privacy.” She walks over to her sister and pats her on the shoulder before walking in the direction of the manor. I stare at her for some time before looking Yui. She looks at me with a mixture of worry and caution.

 

Yui steps next to me and nearly falls onto the ground beside me. She stares into my eyes, but I’m unable to look into hers. Instead I look at the ground. “Look, Yu-” I begin but am stopped as I feel something envelope me. I blink in awe as I see Yui wrap her arms around me and bury her face into my chest. I see tears begin to form in the corner of her close eyes.

 

“I’m so sorry,” she says meekly. “I so sorry, Subaru. I was being so stupid and completely ignored your feelings. That day at the mall, I was wrong to leave you. Not only did I drag you around, but I worried you. And when you agreed to talk about it, I totally dismissed it to get upset over things between my sister and myself. It wrong to worry you, to ignore your feelings. You were just carrying about me, and I was being rude and a...a bitch. And even after all that, I was avoiding you. I just couldn’t face you, I didn’t know how.” Her voice begin to crack and I feel something wet drop on my thin t-shirt. “I just can’t take it any more, Subaru. When I’m not with you, when we were avoiding each other, it just killed me inside. I know that you prefer to be by yourself, that you rather not talk much, but those moment together, the few words between us, it's enough to make me happy all day long. When I first came here, things were scary and odd, they still are sometimes. Like you said, I’m different from the other brides, and no one is sure about how long I’m going to be here. But even if I stay here for the rest my life, as long as I’m with you, I’m fine. Because I love being with you, I don’t know if you do too, but I feel as if you do.”

 

I’m mesmerized by her words. It feel as if it's been ages since anyone has said anything like that to me. My mind seems to draw a blank, unable to process anything. Her words, her embrace, her tears, it feels as if it's too much. I have no clue what to do, fuck.

 

Heistaly, I wrap my arms around her and pull her closer me. I hear her gasp slightly and I look away before my already colored cheeks turn beet red. “Hey, Yui, stop crying, I...I hate seeing you cry, ‘kay. I’m not good at stuff like this and you know that.” I sigh and place a hand in her blonde locks of hair and begin to stroke her head. “Look, I’m also sorry. I completely blew up on you that day. I knew you would never try to leave, I just didn’t know how to react. I also hated not talking with you. Believe me, it was utter hell without you yapping to me like it was the last hour of your life.” I hear her make a sound that seem like a muffled attempt of a laugh. Whatever it was, it encourages me to move toward. “I’m the same as you, I didn’t know how to fix the problem, so I just let it worsen. Yeah, it was a dumb idea, but I have no experience in this. Furthermore, I do like the time we spend together. I know I don’t say much or give the best responses, but I’m extremely happy that you spend your time with me, although I don’t show it like others. But the fact that you can tell means that you know me good enough to tell how I’m feeling.”

 

She sniffs and lifts her head so she is gazing her glassy, pink eyes. I swear, there is something unworldly about those god damn eyes of hers. I place my hand on her cheeks and wipe the tears from her eyes. “Get off of me, you baby. We should really head inside before you get sick or something.”

 

She smiles and get up from the ground and I follow her action. She look back to the damaged tree and fallen branch. “What did happen here?”

 

“Just letting of steam,” I say casually as I slide my hands into the pockets of my pants. I begin to walk down the path as Yui calls for me to wait up. She catches up to me and we walk in a comfortable silence. I don’t tell her about how i doubted her for about Laito, I refuse to ruin this moment. 

 

She doesn’t wipe that goofy grin from her face, but I don’t mind it much.

* * *

**Laito’s POV**

 

I watch Subaru and Yui emerge from the path. The blonde smiles cheekily at my brother, but he gives no visible sign of amusement or anger. 

 

I sigh in defeat. “Aww, this sucks, and to think that things seemed to working out fine at the beginning,” I whine to my brother. Ayato glares at the duo with a look of disgust on his face, his eyes narrowed at them. He sucks his teeth at the sight and looks away.

 

“I don’t know why I listened to you,” he says, sending me a nasty look.

 

“Don’t blame me, you had nothing better to offer.”

 

“Well you did the exact opposite of our goal, you jackass! Do they look like they’re mad at each other? Unless your stupidness has reached an all time high and it has blinded you, you should obviously see that bitch is smiling like she is enjoying herself, not running away in tears.”

 

“Well, our plan did backfire on us, drastically.” I place my hand on my forehead. “I hope he doesn’t kill us over this.”

 

“Well if that bastard has a problem with it, he can kiss my ass. If he wanted it done, then he should have came up with his own fucking plan.”

 

“But weren’t  _ you  _ the eager one that offered to separate the two?” I send a mischievous glance to my triplet brother and he sends me a hate filled one in reply. “I do remember you wanting Yui all to yourself, but Subaru was in your way. Well, I guess you don’t have a chance now.”

 

My brother is at my throat, emerald eyes piercing into my own. “Shut the hell up, don’t you speak to Yours Truly like that unless you want me to end your life.”

 

“What ever, Ayato. Maybe we will have better luck with Shuu and his oh-so-special Hikari.”

 

Ayato scoff at my statement. “Yeah right, like I’m getting between him and a bride. If he wants to suffer all over again, he can be my fukcing guest.”

 

‘Now, Ayato,” I say to my younger triplet in a lecture type voice, “We have been given the important task of making sure these two pin heads don’t get all lovey-dovey over these girls. He got really mad after last time, and I don’t want that to happen all over again.”

 

Ayato rolls his eyes and mutter a ‘whatever’ under his breath. I look back down at the vampire-human duo. I thought if I gave them the proper push, they could tear themselves apart, but it did quite the opposite. Unlike Ayato, I have no really bother with them being something, it just give me more of a reason to bother the two. The main reason I care is because after one particular incident, love between one of us and a bride is something that should be avoided. Not only does it make it problematic when we try to get her blood, but when death eventually comes to her, her love usually makes an annoying protest about it. It wasn’t like it happened more than once, but after one truly bothersome incident, it became something that we try to...help each other avoid. 

 

I narrow my eyes at my white-haired, half-brother, and as if sensing me, he looks up and spots me on the balcony. His red eyes lock with my green ones and his narrow. I wonder if he knows what he’s getting into. I know he’s not good with his emotions, but I wonder how far he’s going to go with it. I wonder if he knows about the fling between Yui and me. 


	31. Lose Her

**Shuu’s POV**

I walk down the halls with my hands in my pocket. It seems as if no one else in the mansion has left their room. It's another quiet night in the manor, I guess. Even if there was something going on, I wouldn’t hear it because of the music filling my ears and mind. The music is still boring, and I have the urge to ask Hikari to play for me.

Of course, I wouldn’t ask that of her. Not only would my pride no allow me, but I refuse to go back in the room. I surprised myself earlier this week by not only opening the door but letting Hikari in. I was so focused on making Hikari feel better, my mind didn’t have time to wander into the past. I wonder if I go in there now, will I be able to play like I did that day. If I will be able to play freely, without the chains of the past holding me down.

As I walk down the stairs, I hear the front door open. I with one sniff of the air, I smell Hikari’s unique fragrance. For some reason, I don’t want her to see me. In an instant behind a shelf, in a position where I can see her, but she can’t see me. She sticks her head out from outside and looks around as if searching for someone. This action makes me raise a brow in curiosity. She softly steps in and closes the door slowly. She cringes when it makes the inevitable creaking noise. She looks around again after staying still for a moment. Her feet are quick as she makes her way up the stairs.

With a final glance at the stairways, I leave my spot and head out the door. I breathe in the cool October air as I make my way to my usual place on the property. It is on the side of the manor, so no one usually comes here. I find the stone gazebo and recline on the cold stone bench. I lay my arm over my eyes and think about the events that happened not too long ago.

Hikari coming from outside is nothing I would be interested in, but her actions only cause questions to fly in my head one after another. Why was she acting so suspiciously, like she is hiding something? What could she have possibly been doing?

I inhale deeply and let it out after a moment. I need to calm down, there must be some kind of logical reason or this. More than likely, she wouldn’t want Laito or Ayato to hear her entering and start to pester her. I nod my head, thinking that that is a reasonable cause.

Why do I even care? If she acts weird, that’s on her, I need to calm down. What she does in none of my business. But the fact that she won't escape my thoughts is evidence that my emotions towards her are different from those of other people. At first, I thought that it was the effects from the lack of blood. I wasn’t feeling well when these emotions first started to show, I thought it was a result of my already ill feeling. Even after that incident, I denied it, saying that emotions were lingering side effects. But my reasoning was becoming nothing but mere excuses.

Honestly, I want to acknowledge these feelings, these emotions, but I refuse to. If this happens again, then it will be nothing but agony. I’m more scared of hurting her then myself. I’ve been down this path more than once, I refuse to travel it again. I’m not putting Hikari’s already fragile state of mind and emotions at risk, which is something I can’t bring myself to do. I know she has already been through so much, and I don’t want to add anything to the pain she already carries around. I don’t want to be the reason why something tragic happens again.

I caused my first friend to almost die in a fire and was left with only half his memory.

I was the reason for the death of my first love.

I have already done so many selfish things in my life. And even after I know I have inflicted pain on someone, and I try to fix it, things only turn to a chaotic hell for the both of us. I promised myself that I was no longer going to find interest in anything or anyone this world. They are all idealistic, short-lived expenses that will leave in the blink of an eye. I’m determined to not allow any of these fleeting object or people to take hold of my mind or heart.

That was my goal long ago, but it seems as if this girl, this human, is making my world spin. The way she can be firm and assertive, yet still shaken and submissive to feed my inner sadist. She can not only play songs for me but do it was a free spirit I can only wish for. The sparkle in her eyes and sincerity of her smile seems to promise me that today can be better than the last.

The perfect person I know can only stay the way she is if I let her be and not harm her anymore.

With a sigh, I get up from the bench and sit up. The night air does nothing to calm me, so I guess I should head inside. Having nothing better to do, I make my way to the front door in mere seconds. I step inside and head for my room. I’m about to walk up the stairs when I smell Hikari again.

I move from the stairway and begin to walk down the hall. The farther I go, the more defiant her scent become. I soon hear the sound of something flying through the air. I smirk as an idea of what Hikari may be doing comes into my mind.

Sure enough, through the cracked door of the game room, I can see the brunette playing a solo game of darks. She is wearing a sapphire blue shirt that has a white rose, outlined in black, on it. The flower has thorny vines coming out of it which going down to her elbow. She wears simple black slacks with the outfit. Her brown locks of hair are tied in a ponytail, exposing her neck. Staring at her olive neck, it takes everything in my power to no walk over to her and sink my fangs into her flesh.

Still not noticing me, she sends another dart flying towards the board. So far, she has managed to get a dart directly on the five, the inner ring of eighteen, and the last on sticks in the outer circle of three. She groans and stomps her foot like a child. “Shit,” she mutters under her breath. “I swear, there is something wrong with these fucking darts. One of those damn vampires better take a look at them, because I know I’m better than this.”

I bite my cheek slightly as I try to not to laugh. Not only is she talking to herself, something I had no idea she did, but he is blaming the darts for her poor ability. “Or maybe you’re just bad at playing.”

My voice startles the girl, making her visible jump in surprise. Her back is towards me and it takes her a moment to turn around. She has a sheepish smile on her face. “H-Hey, Shuu,” she says. “How long have you been there?”

I walk into the room with my arms crossed. “Long enough to tell you suck at darts.”

“Like you can do any better,” she mumbles under her breath which doesn’t go unnoticed to me.

I walk over to the board and remove the blue darts from their spot in the dart holder. I take multiple strides back until I’m several meter away from the board. I look into her pink eyes and throw a dart at the board. I don’t have to look at the target to know I hit it in the center, her expression tells me all I need to now. “I surely can.”

She narrows her eyes at and a smile plays on her lips. “Can I challenge you to a game of darts?”

I raise a brow at her. I tell myself that I should just put down the darts and leave now, but not only does the game give me some time with Hikari, but I will love to see the look of defeat on her face. “You’re going to get beat, bad,” I tell the girl.

I instantly regret the word choice, because I see her expression change for a moment. She almost flinches at the words, and I see he press her lips together. The shine in her eyes fade and she stiffens slightly. I want to apologize or cover my mistake, but I know it will only make this situation worse. Leaving now will also inflict the same problem.

But as soon as the state washed over her, it leaves. “I will try my best, though,” she says. She smiles again, but the sparkle to her eyes don’t come back. She walks over to the board and retrieves not only her red darts but my blue one. She comes my way and places it in my hand, our hands just barely grazing each other.

We take our places a few meters from the board. She has a determined look on her face, and I swear she actually looks a bit sexy with it. Although I personally prefer a submissive expression. I wonder what she would look like begging, pleading for me to give her pleasure. The feeling of her smooth skin under my hands, erotic gasp leaving her mouth due to my touch. I’m extremely curious about how her moans and cries of pleasure would sound echoing off the walls of my room.

“Shuu,” Hikari’s voice snaps me out of my lewd thoughts. “Are you going to go?”

I have to mentally recompose myself after the erotic thoughts were roaming wildly in my mind. I hope I wasn’t staring or showing any sign that I was completely out of it, something that rarely happens to me. “Ladies first,” I reply.

I see the corner of the mouth twitch, fighting a smile. She shrugs and lifts her arm. She bobs it a few times before sending the dart sailing towards the board. It hits the inner circle of the nineteen. She smiles in triumph and sends a glance my way.

I shrug and left my arm to throw the dart. Right before I let it go she says, “Were you spying on me or something?”

The sudden question makes me lose focus and my dart flies and gets the outer circle for the five. My eyes look over at her. She has a surprised look on her face, but I then see her smile slightly. I don’t know whether or not she was planning the slip-up, but she is certainly proud of it.

“For the millionth time,” I say with a sigh. “I do not act like my brothers. I do not spend my free time watching people, not only is it boring but a waste of time.”

She nods and readies for her next throw. I smile inwardly, knowing it's my turn to mess her up. “What I don’t appreciate is being called a ‘damn vampire’.” The sentence itself wasn’t what I was thinking of, but it seems to come out by itself. Regardless, it seems to work, because she lets go of the dart too soon and it lands on the outer ring of the six.

“I didn’t mean that,” she says, looking at the ground. “I was just frustrated with the game.”

“Whatever,” I say, sending a dart into the air. It lands in the inner ring of the seventeen. I smirk, knowing I’m now winning. “You’re probably just bad.”

“That’s pretty, cold, even for you Shuu.” She sends a glare my way. “I don’t know why I’m screwing up this time. I used to play darts in rehab all the time. The darts and board were different, though, they didn’t allow sharp objects there. There was this man in his late thirties, Mr.Ritsu. We used to play darts together after lunch every day. He won most of the time, but he taught me good enough that I scored, at least, hundred and fifty points with five darts.” She sigh and smiles slightly. “He was also so nice, even when he gloated about his numerous wins. He was fun to talk to when he wasn’t beating me in this silly game. He ended up leaving before I did. He went home to his little boy and wife he told me so much about.”

Her eyes get glassy and she looked down, biting her lips. She inhales deeply and hold it in. All I want to do is wrap my arms around her and tell her that things after okay. That the man is probably happy with his family and cherishes the time he spent with her. But I hold myself back. She looks back up and exhales. She looks back over at me and smiles softly. “I’m sorry, you probably don’t want to hear my tales of rehab.”

But she is wrong. I would love to hear the stories she has been told, all the interesting things she has done there. Her being able to speak to me about stuff like this makes me feel happy, it feels me with some sort of pride. Her being opened to me about her past is something I’ve been waiting for.

She looks back over at board, and, without hesitation, sends her dart flying that the board. It hits the inner ring of the twenty, scoring her sixty points. She pumps her arm in triumph. “Yes!”

I ready my last dart at the board. Before sending it into the board I voice the sentence that has been wanting to come out the second I saw her, “You can talk to me about whatever, I’ll listen.”

My dart finds its way to the center of the board, but Hikari doesn’t see it at first. Her eyes linger on me for a bit longer than they should have. He large pink eyes stare into my own, her pupils dilated. After a bit too long, she blinks and faces the board. “Oh, you hit the middle, bull’s eye, congrats.”

She walks away from me and studies the board. “You win,” she announces flatly. After a long moment, she turns around with her usual smile and says in a much more cheerful voice, “by ten points only. If we had more darts, I would have totally won.”

“Is that so?” I say with a raised brow. “Are you trying to challenge me to another game?”

She gives a wave of her hand. “Nah,” her eyes travel to something else in the room, “but I’m positive I can win in pool.” She practically skips over to the pool table. Not waiting for me to accept the challenge, she begins to set up the game. I stare in wonderment at the human, wondering what she could possibly be thinking. I have learned that she acts a bit more flamboyant and random when she is nervous or uneasy.

And I find myself being drawn to this side of her.

“Striped,” I say.

“Hm?”

“I’m striped.”

Her smile only widens and she nods. I walk to the wall and grab a cue stick. After lifting the triangle from the balls, Hikari also grabs her stick. “Are we playing by American rules, because that is what I’m used to,” she says, looking at me with a questioning glance.

“Sure.”

“‘Kay. Since you won darts, you can go first.”

I nod and grab the white ball. I place it on the felt-covered table and position my stick behind it. I strike the white ball, sending it towards the other ones. The collision sends the colored orbs to roll and ricochet off the walls of the table. The striped, green, orange, and blue balls fall into various holes. I fight a smirk of triumph and walk to the other side of the table.

I send a quick glance at Hikari, her face void of emotion. I begin to wonder where all of her excitement went. I know small talk isn’t my strong point, especially in the circumstance we are in, but the events of earlier come into my mind. “What were you doing earlier?” I ask bluntly. I strike the white ball, causing it to knock into a solid one, which collides into another and the solid purple ball falls into a hole, giving Hikari a step up.

“You didn’t need to do that,” she says. “I don’t want to be taken lightly.” She moves to the opposite side of the table and position the cue stick on the side of the ball. It seems as if she is going to ignore my question, but she answers, “I stepped outside for some time.” She strikes the white ball, making it hit two solid balls, both finding their ways into a corner of the table.

She moves again, her eyes never leaving the table. “I wanted to think for some time, and also explore the property some.” The statement makes me stiffen a bit. I have heard this before, I know I have. And it didn’t end well.

Hikari frowns at the table and sigh. Placing her stink on the table, careful not to touch any of the spheres, she lifts herself onto the side of the table. She places her hand, as well of most of her upper body, on the table and position the tip of the stick. She strikes the ball again, sending both a striped and solid ball into different corners. She groans slightly and looks up at me. “Your turn.” She slides off the table and fixes her clothes.

“What point is there to explore the property?” I ask, setting myself in a position to hit the ball. My eyes leave the ball and look at Hikari when she doesn’t answer.

“Just to see if there is anything interesting out there.”

“Believe me, there isn’t, so there is no need for you to go ‘exploring’ anymore.” My words are stern and I strike the ball with more aggression than I was meaning to. The white ball hits a wall and bounces all but doesn’t collide with another.

She lets out a nervous laugh, and walks to a side of the table. “There is always something interesting to find. It may be boring to you, but it's still new for me.” She strikes the white ball, ending another solid ball into a hole. “If I’m limited to the property, then I’m going to take full advantage of it.” She begins to circle the table. “I would honestly love to go somewhere besides school, li-”

“Stop,” I snap at her, cutting her off. She looks up with me, her forced smile fading. I feel anger begin to simmer inside of me. No, it's happening again. She wants to leave the manor. I know her ‘exploring’ in nothing more than bullshit. I’m not allowing this to happen, not again. “You can’t leave the manor. You go from school to the mansion, no in between, no trips ‘outside’.”

“Shuu, you and I both know that is a bit unrealistic. Even the other week, Yui got to leave.” Her voice has changed from her usual excited tone or her ‘stern’ one, but more like a pleading on. “Why can’t I g-”

“No, Hikari!” I shout at her. “You aren’t leaving the manor. I will not allow you to, you are staying here. And if you so much of think of leaving on your own, I swear I’ll make you regret it!”

Memories and emotions I told myself I will keep locked away begin to leave the cage of my heart and mind. I feel anger begin to seep through my mind and the feeling of lose weigh down my heart. I feel my breath come out a bit harder, my calm demeanor shattered.

I look up at the human. I’m not allowing her to leave here, to leave me. If that means I’m going to keep her bottled up in the manor, so be it. But I cannot let her leave, to let her hurt herself and myself too. Nothing good can come from letting another go, from letting her go.

Her eyes once again get glassy and he see her face turn a bit pink. She swallows and turn away from me. She inhales a shaky breath through her mouth and walks to the wall, putting her cue stick away. “I’m done, you win,” she says sharply, and I can tell she is trying to prevent her voice from cracking. She has her head down when she goes by me, but I still see the tears forming in the corner of her eyes. She practically marches to the other side of the room and out the door.

The second her footstep are no longer audible, everything comes crashing down on me. I just made her cry. The guilt of the situation caused by my anger feels like a stab to the heart. All she wanted was to go outside, and I yell at her. I feel despicable.

I knew it, I knew I could only hurt her. Not only did I crush her reasonable request, but I threatened her. I feel anger towards myself swell up. How can I do this to her? I’m disgusted with myself. After all she’s been through, the endless pain and suffering she already had inflicted on her, I’m going to threaten to hurt her for thinking about leaving.

I don’t even need to say much to hurt her. I throw my stick, sending it towards the wall with enough force to cause it to impale the wall. What despicable creature am I to say such things? All she wanted to do was to challenge me in a few games, and I ruin the whole thing by voicing my damn curiosity. I should have waited, fuck, I shouldn’t have mentioned it.

But I couldn’t hold back. I didn’t, don’t, want to lose Hikari. I don’t want to lose her like I lose Sakura.

* * *

 

_ “Shuu-sama.” My name leaves her lips in a gasp. _

_ “Shhh,” I hush, brushing her long brown locks out of her face. She looks at me with her sky blue eyes. My fingers graze her cheeks tucking the hair behind her ear. My digits smoothly travel down her marked neck and over her bare shoulder. I lean down and plant a kiss on the smooth skin of her collar bone. I then trail the kiss back up her neck. “And I said no ‘sama’,” I peck her skin again, “not when we are like this.” _

_ My fingers travel downwards, skimming her side. She gasps again, and I smirk. I know she is sensitive here, and I love lightly grazing my fingers over it, making her muscles twitch. I move my face from the crook of her neck and down to her exposed chest. _

_ I lick the nipple of her right breast, swirling my tongue around the flesh. She hitches a breath and I stop. I smile slightly and blow on the wet flesh, making it grow more erect. I take the small flesh between my lips and pull at it slightly. She moans at the pressure, arching her back some. She intertwines her fingers in my hair and pulls softly. _

_ “I thought you said we were being gentle this time,” I say sly, let go of her. _

_ “I’m sorry,” she apologizes, something she does quite often. “You’re just a tease, though,” she says it softly, a bit embarrassed. _

_ I smirk at her. It isn’t in the norm for me to be gentle, on the contrary, I prefer to be receiving the pleasure. But I feel as if there are times when I should be on the other side, spoiling the girl. Although I did agree to give, it doesn’t mean I’m going to do it to the max. Next to receiving pleasure, I enjoy teasing my underling. It pleasures my sadist side, seeing her plead to be touched, quivering under my speckled touch. _

_ Deciding to be nice, I cup her breast in my hand and she gasp in surprise. I grope the flesh, pinching her nipple between my index and middle finger. _

_ “Sha-ah-uu, ah, Shuu,” she moans at the pleasurable pain. I move over to her neglected breast and flick my tongue over the bud before drawing it in my mouth. I suck the bud, biting it slightly with my front teeth. She hisses slightly, tightening her grip in my hair. _

_ I remove my hand from her mound and take her hand from my hair. I lace our fingers together and look up at her, my eyebrow raised. _

_ “You’re not playing nicely,” she says with a pout. _

_ “It's hard for me to play nice,” I say. I level my face with her, our eyes locked together. I place my forehead against hers and my hand on her cheek. I leaned down, capturing her lips with my own. I kiss her softly at first, but then it grows more passionate. I skim my tongue on her bottom lip, asking for permission. She grants it and I slide my tongue into her mouth, allowing it to roam. I break away from the kiss, giving us both a moment to breathe. I stare back into her hypnotizing eyes. “But I can always try ‘being nice’ for you.” _

_ I close my eyes and open them, but she is no longer there. I look around frantically, realizing I’m not even on my own bed anymore. I’m surrounded by a black abyss like I’m in a spotlight and everything else is left in the dark. I don’t sense anything, making my adrenaline spike. I try calling out my love’s name, but nothing will leave my mouth. _

_ After an eternity, a light seems to turn on behind me. I instantly turn around to see her in a spotlight of her own. She sitting on the piano bench, wearing her favorite pink dress, flower hair piece fixated in her hair. Her back is towards me like she doesn’t know I’m here. I try to call out again, but no words are being voiced. She opens the cover the piano and places her hands on the keys, readying to play. The piece that seems to haunt me plays out with an eerie echo. _

_ I begin to run towards her, but it seems almost in possible. I would have better luck running through quicksand than in here. It feels as if a force is holding me down, and when my foot is finally placed on the ground, I’m taken two steps back. She still plays the piece, unaware of my presence. Soon, the melodic sounds turn to a cacophony of low-pitched echoes. It sounds as if she is now just banging on the keys at random. _

_ The sound is almost monstrous, and it seems to shake everything. It's like there are drums is in my ears, being hit repeatedly as hard as possible. I fall to my knees, covering my ears with my palms. Even so, her movement is still graceful and flows beautifully, like she is unaffected by the noise. I call out to her once more, and this time, it comes out. She seems to hear me because she removes her hands from the instrument and leaves the bench. _

_ In only a few steps, she is in front of me. I look up at her with bewildered eyes, not knowing what is going on. Her face is at ease, smiling like usual. She slides her hands onto my cheeks, her are palms smooth but cold to the touch. I flinch slightly at the touching, wondering why she’s like this. I know appearance is the differentiation of concern, but she still smiles down at me as if the moment is flawless. _

_ She kisses my forehead and says, “I love you, Shuu.” _

_ My words are caught in my and I feel tears begin to swell in my eyes. I reach out for her, but she disappears once more. I feel a breeze sweep over my and I look around again. I’m on the pathway leading to the gates of the estate. The air is cool and the breeze causes my hair to fly in my face. The mean is a crescent shape and the stars sprinkle the sky. _

_ But there is nothing beautiful about this night. _

_ All I can smell is blood, the rich, metallic smell of blood. It is pooled under the body that lies limply on the ground. Her limbs are twisted, angled in ways they should be in. Her once white blouse is dyed crimson, a gaping hole in the area of her abdomen. And her once joyous, blue eyes are now lifeless. _

_ I take shaken steps towards her, staggering like an unstable person. I drop to my knees before her, her blood soaking into my pants. With trembling hands, I touch the cold, lifeless body. I look at her face, which is to never smile again. Her open mouth now muted for eternity. Her dead eyes, their sparkle forever gone. _

_ I retract my hands from her body, clenching them and putting them on my knees. And for the first time in years, I cry. My tears begin to run down my face. The sorrow filled liquid drips off my face and onto the unmoving hand of the girl. I want it to raise up and brush over my cheek like it always does, but it remains motionless. _

_ With a heaving chest, I whisper out her name, as if asking, pleading for her to answer. But, of course, she remains silent. _

_ With regret and agony feeling my voice, I scream her name out into the night sky, “Sakura!” _


	32. Sakura

Like the rest, she was a sacrificial bride from the church. Brides aren’t supposed to come to the manor knowing the conditions they are going to living in. The come and we explain little of their new circumstance then. Most of them will react with frighten expression and try to leave to prevent the inevitable. Most put up fights and refused to live in the new conditions.

Sakura was different.

She came on a cold, December night. When she first entered the manor, she didn’t seem like anything special. She had extremely long brown hair which reached past her butt. She had fair skin, not much of a bust, but otherwise a good figure. Her blue eyes seemed to take in everything about the house and all of us, nothing unusual for a person in a new environment.

But she was anything but usual.

I remember the first words she said to us when she entered the meeting room. “Hello, I’m Sakura Tohru,” she said so us. Her voice was calm and soothing, something none of us were expecting. “I’m aware of the condition that I’m going to be living under for the time I’m going to be here. I will try my best to fulfill any requirements you have for me. I’m here for whatever you feel fit to occupy me with. I’m at your mercy and hope to please you all and not cause any kind of problems. I apologize in advance for any mistake or wrongdoing I may cause when I am here and I promise I will try not to inflict any trouble on anyone.”

None of us had a response to her...introduction. After a moment of silence, Laito started saying how he wish the rest of the sacrifices were like Sakura. Without a second of hesitation, he said he would take her to her room and get her settled in. I didn’t give it any mind, I didn’t really find much interest in any of the brides that were sent to the manor one after another.

We later learned that she not only learned about the doings at the manor but volunteered to come in the place of one of her friends. I thought it was a foolish thing to do, once Sakura was gone, they would probably just send her friend after her.

Like she said, she tried her best not to cause a fuss of any sort. She was compliant when we demanded her blood, never resisting any of us once. I thought she was a masochist, at first, we have had some of them in the past, but that wasn’t that case with this one. After a week or so, I found myself becoming more and more interested in her.

One day, I went into her room for no reason in particular. When I entered, she was facing away from the door, sitting in a chair reading a book. Because of the large back of the chair, she didn’t see me out of her peripheral vision. I walked up behind her and looked over her shoulder at the book. I was, and still am, quite fluent in English so it didn’t take much effort to read the story. In intentionally, I started reading the story.

“Stupid,” I mumble to myself, talking about the foolish characters in the book. The idiotic teenagers we throwing themselves off of a cliff into a body or water near a waterfall.

I didn’t notice I voiced my opinion until Sakura let out an embarrassed squeak. She quickly turned around to see me behind her, leaning against the chair. She practically threw herself out of the chair, dropping the book onto the floor. She stood up on the other side of the chair facing me. She was frightened by my sudden presence and it was far too noticeable.

“Sh-Shuu-sama,” she stammered. “I’m sorry, I didn’t notice you were in here. I’m terribly sorry if I made you wait, I didn’t hear you come in. If I did, I promise I would have attended to you. What is it that you need, do you need my blood?” Without waiting for an answer, she began to unbutton her purple blouse. She was always so quick to offer any of us her blood. She would always take the liberty of opening her shirt so we had better access to her neck and collarbone. She also always had a hair band on her wrist so she was able to tie up her long hair when it was out.

“No, I don’t,” I said with the roll of my eyes.

Her head snapped up, fingers still placed on her button. “You don’t?” she repeated it like a question. An understanding look came over her face and she nodded slowly. “Do you desire...something else?” She hinted at something I knew she could only consider because of Laito and Ayato constant pervertedness.

“I have no desire for any of that,” I said flatly, slightly mocking her.

She narrowed her eyes in confusion. “Excuse me if I’m being rude, but why is it that you’re in my room if you don’t need blood nor do you want pleasure?”

Her wording and expression were a bit amusing, which caused my lip to tug up a bit in a smile. It was funny because I also had the same question on my mind. It seems as if I have always done stuff without thinking much of it. Dismissing her question, I asked her one of my own. “What is that book you are reading?”

She blinked a few times before her eyes traveled downwards where mines were. “Oh,” she said, bending down to pick up the dropped book. “ _ Tuck Everlasting _ ,” she said the book titles with a bit of enthusiasm I never heard from her. “I’m not that far in it. It is about this girl named Winnie who is bored of her proper life. She ventures into her family’s woods and meets a mysterious boy named Jessie. Jessie and his family have been blessed with immortality. At the moment, Winnie and Jessie were hanging out.”

“It was a gift from my friend,” she said. “We loved reading book, mainly American novels. We met online on this website where people discussed books. He had a similar interest in books, so we clicked instantly. He was kind and we met in person a few times, but he was alway so busy. He sent me this book about a year and a half ago. It's odd, right after sending the book, he never got back online. It was a shame because there were so many books I still wanted to talk about . Some were light hearted others could get a bit dark, but almost all were enjoyable. I didn’t know if you had novels here, so I brought a few I didn’t read yet.

When she spoke of the book, there was a smile plastered on her face, one I didn’t know she was capable of ginning. And, at that moment, I say it; the sparkle in her eyes. I could have missed it if I wasn’t looking into her sky blue eyes, but the moment it appeared, it was clear as a cloudless sky.

But it seemed to disappear the moment she focused on me.

“I’m sorry,” she said looking away. “You don’t want to hear about that.”

I shrugged my shoulders, not really being bothered. It was in the norm for brides to rant about their lives before something here. Usually, others would do it while crying or having a very angered look on their faces. But Sakura spoke about her time with her unnamed friend with a smile on her face and a sparkle in her eyes.

She looked at me and gave me an almost sheepish smile. “Were...you reading it?”

My eyebrows rose in surprise. I didn’t believe she remembered my remark about the characters. “I was just curious.” A feeling that I rarely showed and seemed to always be the root of my every problem. Like this one.

“Would you like it if I...read it to you?” She said it with a bit on a cringe, as if not wanting to ask. To this day, I wonder why she ever asked me the question. What dauntless demon possessed that timid girl to ask me a question? Maybe it was her being her caring self. Maybe it was a way to remove the tension and uneasiness of the situation. Maybe it was a spur of the moment thing.

Whatever the reason, it is something I’m both grateful and angered about.

“Why not?” I said with a shrug. She gave a small smile and sat down on the foot cushion that went with the chair. I seated myself on the plush seat and rested my elbow against the armrest. I placed my head on my fist and looked at the brunette. “Begin.”

With that, she started the story from the beginning. I listened to the story, occasionally sending Sakura a glance. Her eyes rarely ever left the pages of the book. Her voice echoed off the walls of her room, almost warming the atmosphere.

She read a good portion of the book before Ayato came in and interrupted the room. I ended up leaving because I had no need to watch my half-brother take her blood.

The next day I ended up going back to her room. My excuse at the time was to hear what else happened in the story, but the real reason was so I could be with Sakura; so see that sparkle again. I walked in the room, knocking of the doorframe. She turned away and smile softly when she say me. “Hello, Shuu-sama.”

“You’re done with the other book?” I questioned, ignoring her greeting. I saw she was reading another book, which made me slightly mad.

“No,” she said with a shake of her head. She got out of the room and walked over to her dress her. She placed the red cover book on it and picked up another, which was the one we were currently reading. “I didn’t want to continue reading  _ Tuck Everlasting _ if we were reading together.”

It filled me with a sort of happiness knowing she stopped reading the book because I wasn’t there. Because she wanted to read it with me. I nodded at turned away from her, stepping back into the hall. “We are going to my room,” I said. It really annoyed me when Ayato intruded yesterday. I knew that if we were in my room, no one would come in.

I send a glance her way. She was staring at me surprised, but she soon nodded and walked over towards me. We went to my room and she read the book to me.

It continued like that for some time. Every day I would go over to her and we would go back to my own room. She would read to me as I lay on my bed and listened to her. After I believe the third day, I started commenting on parts of the book. Although most of them were brief, we would have discussions about the book. Every time she read, she seemed happy, and that undeniable sparkle would come to her eyes.

I felt a bit upset the day she finished the book. The reason I constantly brought her in my room no longer had a purpose. I knew she felt it too because she seemed sort of upset when she closed the book. “Well,” she said with a sigh, “that’s the end. A good book, sad ending, though.”

“There aren’t many happy ending in this world,” I said bluntly and she meekly nodded her head.

She slid off my bed with the book in her hand. “I guess I will go back to my room now. It was really fun reading this book, and I think it made it even better that I read it with you. Your company is very comforting”

I saw it then, the sparkle in her eyes. She wasn’t speaking about her life or a book or her friend when I saw it. No, she was speaking about me, to me. It filled me with an unknown feeling when she spoke with such glee about me. And when I finally achieved that happiness, that sparkle, I knew I couldn’t let it end there.

“Do you play the piano?” I asked, the question seemingly coming out of nowhere.

“Pardon me?” she asked with a small smile.

“You always look at the piano when you’re in my room,” I stated, gesturing towards said instrument in the corner of my room.

“Oh,” she said, giving me a sheepish look, “yes, I do play.”

I knew at that moment I had a reason to keep her with me, a connection that won't end like a story. “You can play if you want.”

She gave me a shocked expression. “Are you sure?”

I gave her a nod. She gave me a nod of her own as if reassuring herself that I did nod. A bit hesitantly, she walked over to the piano, not breaking eye contact.

She set her book down on the bench and held her black skirt against her thighs as she sat down. She uncovered the board, revealing dozen of keys. She set her fingers on the keys but didn't begin. She took a deep breath and started to hum like she was thinking. After some time, she sighed and started to play.

I didn't know the song at the time. All I knew was that it no words could describe it. It felt sad, but it didn’t make me feel upset. It could've been a calming song, but it only caused me to focus intensity on every note played. And saying it was beautiful would've been more of an insult than a complement, because it was far from that.

She played with grace that could surpass my own. Her face was calm, at ease and for a moment her eyes were closed, yet her fingers still danced over the keys with perfection.

Her fingers lingered on the keys once she was done, not moving not breathing. I understand her, coming down from the high the piano put her. Slowly, she removed her hands from the keys and closed the cover. She looked over at me with a smile. “Thank you so much, Shuu-sama. I really appreciate it.”

She grabbed her book and slid off the bench. As she walked past my bed I asked, “What song did you play?”

She stopped and looked at me. “Hmm, _ River Flows Through You _ , do you like it?”

“Yeah,” I said with a shrug, “it was nice.”

Her smile grew and suddenly, she began to laugh. I gave her a questioning look, wondering what was so funny. “I'm sorry...sorry,” she apologized through her fit of giggles. She took a few breaths to calm herself. “It's just, you act as if you don't care, but I can tell you were intrigued by the song. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have laughed.”

I stared at the girl, dumbfounded. How did someone that has known for only two weeks read me so easily? No one had ever been able to do such a task, and if they could, they would never show it. But she found me out with ease. I rolled my eyes at the human.

“Sorry,” she said, “I should've had said anything about it, my apologies.”

But the comment didn't upset or anger me. Honestly, it made me happy. It filled me with a kind of joy, that there was someone that could read me, which I didn't need to mask myself in front of.

“It's fine,” I said. “You can go if you want.”

She nodded and began to walk up the stairs.

“Two things, though,” I called out from my bed, making her stop in the middle of the stairs. “One: you are welcomed to play,” I gesture towards the piano, “whenever. Two: I want to learn that song.”

Sakura smiled at me and nodded, leaving the room with a notable spring in her step.

And for some time, I was happier than I had been in years. Almost every day, Sakura would come into my room. Either one of us would play the piano, alternating every few pieces. She taught me  _ River Flows Through You _ , which I picked up easily.

Every minute I spent with her was a blessing, ones I knew I didn’t deserve. She's so kind and pure and I felt I was robbing her of it. And the more and more time I spent with her, the more I knew it was a bad idea. Not only did I become more open to her, but I allowed things I wanted to stay burry rise. I told her some about my past and the things I’ve done. No matter what horrid tale I told her, she always smiled the next day.

During the time with her, I also learned many things about her. I first thought she was a masochist, but that changed after a few days with her. She wasn’t seeking attention, pain, or anything of the sort, she was just extremely selfless. She was not only willing to put up with things but took it all in stride. She may have been kind and timid at times, but she was strong and determined.

Spending my time with her was bliss. We would play until we tired and sometimes until the afternoon. We both used the piano as an excuse to be with each other, considering sometimes the cover wasn’t even lifted. I never felt as happy as I did with her. She could understand me in ways no one else could, and she had a way of detecting any emotion I didn’t want to be shown.

One day, Sakura suggested playing a duet. I have no objection to the proposal, so, for the first time, Sakura and I both say in the piano bench. She placed the music sheets, which were in her hand, in the stand so we both had our assigned part. It was a song we both knew quite well, in fact, it was one of the few I taught her. Setting her hands on the keys, she began the piece. After she played a few notes, I joined it. We played together in perfect harmony. We knew how the other played, and we used that to our advantage.

At the end of the song, Sakura moved her hands away from of board. With a sigh, she leaned over and laid her head on my shoulder. I looked down at her to see her smiling softly, eyes closed. She then hummed, something she did when she was thinking.

When I saw her smiling like that, my heart beated a little faster and my stomach seemed to churn ever so slightly. I felt that way so often. Almost every time I was her, I felt different.

“Sakura,” I said, looking down at him.

“Hm?” she mused, opening her eyes I looking up at me. In a heartbeat, I leaned down and to her lips with my own. She let a surprised sound against my lips and stayed still for a moment.

I didn't know if I made the right move or not, but I had to. I broke apart from her, but she connected them again within a milia-second. She moved her hands to my cheeks and pushed me closer to her. It was a bold move for her, but that didn't bother me.

After what felt like forever, we parted. She looked in my blue eyes and I gazed back to hers. Her hands remained on my face as she rested her forehead against mine. “I guess I'm wasn't the only one who wanted to do that,” she said shyly with a smile. She lowered her hands and looked down at her lap, leaning back against my arm.

I looked down at the human, shocked not only at her sudden reaction but her words. I never knew that the girl could act like that, and I liked it. “How long exactly did you want to do that?” I asked slyly.

Her face flushed and she buried her face into my shirt. “I-I don’t know, you...you’re interesting and nice and different and…” she trailed off not looking me in the eye.

I smirked at the blushing human. “Not many people think I’m nice.”

“I can tell that you don’t give many people the opportunity to find out.”

Like she did so many times before, she spoke the truth that many people would never voice. I could also say she was different, that was the one feature of her that made me so attracted to her. The way she accepted things and tried her best to work with them to the fullest. She didn’t let her new lifestyle faze her, she just put up with everything. She never asked for much and seemed hesitant when accepting anything beneficial for herself. She was so caring and selfless, and she didn’t deserve being here.

“Are you trying to hide in my shirt?” I asked the girl.

Immediately, Sakura pulled away from my shirt, face still flushed. She waved her hands frantically and then started to brush my shirt as if she left dust on it. “I’m sorry, Shuu-sama,” she said frantically.

And for what felt like the first time in my life, I laughed. It was a hysterical one or an outrageous-throw-my-head-back-because-it's-so-damn-funny laugh, but it was a sign that the girl’s antics were so damn amusing and I just couldn’t hold back any longer.

She looked up at me with large, surprised eyes. It as if she couldn't believe her eyes which we seeing a smile so large on my face or her ears, which she thought heard my laugh. It took her a moment to take it in and she smiled in response. My laugh seemed to be the equivalent of the sparkle in her eyes because she looked so satisfied with the sight before her.

After that day, Sakura and I became closer than either of us expected. We no longer needed the excuse of playing the piano to see each other, not when our newly ‘confessed’ feeling wouldn't let us part for too long. Some days she would just come in my room and sit in my bed with me. One thing that I felt was very odd yet comforting was that she would ask me lay on her lap and she would play in my hair. She had hair to spare, but she seemed fixated on playing with my own hair. It was calming, and she usually talked when doing it. A few times, she actually sang, although she said she thought she was no good; which I still disagree with to this day.

The next month with her was something that I knew from the started couldn’t last. It was nothing but a firework on a pitch black night. It started out as something small and thought to be insignificant. Soon, though, it exploded into something truly beautiful and beholding. However, after the breathtaking moments of happiness, it fades away, leaving the dark sky bare once more.

I honestly never knew it would happen the way that it did. I carry around the regret every day now, wishing that I noticed earlier. Her smiles becoming a bit more strained, her laughter wasn't sounded as often, the sparkle in her eyes rarely showed. She came to my room less and almost seemed to avoid eye contact when I went to hers. She went outside more, too. “It becoming warmer, and I love the outdoors,” she would say. I never questioned her, though, I never had a reason to second-guess her behavior.

One day she asked if she could sleep in my room, which I didn’t object to. She crawled into the bed and cuddled against my bare chest. I turned and wrapped my arm around her waist pulling her closer to me. My face was near the top of her head and I inhaled the scent of her fruity shampoo.

“Shuu-sama?” I felt her breath against my chest she spoke my name.

“Hmm?”

“Do you like it here?”

Her question was sudden, but she was like that, so it didn’t seem too strange to me. ”More or less, yeah. I lived here for years, so I’ve gotten used to my bastard brothers and it's a nice place” I began to rub my lover’s back softy for no particular reason. “Why, do you not?”

“It’s very pretty,” she said meekly. “I have gotten used to living here, and I’m thankful I’m taken care of. It’s just…” she seem to take in a breath for a moment. “I would like to go out once in awhile.”

At the time, it was pretty reasonable. She was here for over two months. School hadn’t started, so she was at the manor the whole time. I wouldn’t, and didn’t, blame her for not liking being cooped up. There was a rule at the time, though, saying that the brides weren't allowed to leave the property. So of course, I had to tell her no.

“Why not?” she asked, which what was really shocked me. Sakura never questioned things, much less protest. “Can’t we go out for one day or something? I know it can be much to ask for, but I really would love to go out once.”

It was one of the few requests Sakura had ever asked of me. At the moment, I couldn’t see her face, so I couldn't tell how exactly she was feeling. Maybe her expression was sorrowful or maybe even enraged. It was one of the things that I will never know. What I do know, it that was despicable to deny the request my darling made. I don’t even remember if I said it apologetically or gave a decent explanation. All I know is that I said no to her.

No further words were discussed that not. She didn’t say good night or that she loved me, something she always did before falling asleep.

For the next few days, it was like the past week. I was starting to feel suspicious of her behavior, but the assumptions came far too later.

The next day, as I was making my way to my room so I could go to sleep, I heard the sound of the piano being played. I opened my bedroom door to see Sakura at the piano, playing  _ River Flow Through You _ , the first song she ever played for me. Little did I know it was going to be the last.

When she finished, I greeted her, and she gave me a warm smile, yet it didn’t quite reach her eyes. Like a few days back, she asked if she could stay the day in my room, which I happily approved. I thought that she was finally getting back to her old self.

I was stripping down to my boxer, my usual sleeping attire, when I noticed that Sakura had yet to move from the piano bench.

“Um, Shuu-sama?” she asked, not looking in my direction.

“Yeah?” I asked, sitting on my bed, waiting for my lover to join me.

“May I...may I...pleasure you tonight?” she asked hesitantly.

I arched a brow at the girl. We had had our fair share of sexual interaction but never had she flat out asked for it. She had hinted at it only once, the rest of the time it was me who had started it. Never did I think she would ever ask me if she could, which I was as hesitant to accept. Nonetheless, she did exactly what she asked for, which surprised me as much as it pleasured me.

And that day, as we laid entangled in each other, she spoke her final words to me. Even though within the next day my world would be far worse than hell and I would feel like I could no longer function, the moment itself was so sincere, it remains in my heart as a joyous yet sorrow filled moment.

“I love you so much, Shuu. I will always love you, no matter what happens to either of us.”

I shouldn’t have taken it was a sign that something bad was going to happen. I was blinded by both love and happiness to notice anything. This reality I made where I could be happy and share my feeling was someone was nothing but a play. That night, after sunset, the play that was once so beautiful and full, would finish. The curtains will fall and everything would vanish, leaving me alone and empty once more.

I woke up earlier than usual, around seven or so. Sakura was no longer in my bed, which I thought was odd. She would usually stay in my room until I woke up, asking me if I need anything. Not knowing what would await me in a mere hour, I got out of my bed to shower. Soon after bathing, I was making my way through the manor when I heard something that made me freeze in horror.

It was a sound I never heard before, yet I realized it instantly. I had no clue why it was sounding, all I knew is that I need to find Sakura, for her scream was never something I expected to hear so suddenly. Not only was the fact that she was screaming nerve-racking, but it was that she was outside and it was so shrilled it made my blood run cold. I was outside within a mere second.

I heard another scream, followed with a crying sound, something only a pureblood like me can pick up. Once I found Sakura, I encountered a sight that will be forever etched into my mind. Before me I saw Reiji, he's calm expression twisted in one of rage. At the end of his extended arm was Sakura, who was being held by her neck and suspended the air.

“Reiji what hell are you doing!?” I yelled at my younger brother, my words dripping with enough venom to kill.

“Well, Shuu,” my brother said in disgust, “your lover here was trying to escape the property.” He looked back up at the bride, his hand gripping tighter on her neck.

“Let her go, now!” I commanded him, taking a step towards him, my fist clenched.

His fingers clench tighter at the girl's neck, even though her hands were trying to pry them off. He gave me a challenging glare, daring me to take another step. ”You and I both know that happened when they try to leave. She is like all the others, mere livestock. You gaining feeling for her is not only bothersome for us all, but nothing shoot of taboo. I’m not letting this last any longer.”

I wish I did something to stop him. I should have and I regret not doing so. I still stay up some days, asking myself I why I didn’t do anything but stare at my helpless lover. Tears were welling in her eyes and she started back at me. She smiled slightly as if the irony of the situation was the funniest thing ever. The last expression I saw on her face was her smile as she mouthed to me her signature two words, ‘I’m sorry.’

Using his free arm, my brother plunged his hand into Sakura low stomach, impairing the girl. Instantly, her struggling arms and legs went limb and her eyes were lifeless. And all I did was stare as my brother dropped her onto the ground as if she was nothing but a rag doll. He said something that I don’t remember nor do a care about. He left, leaving me with the lifeless Sakura on the pavement.

With weak knees, a staggered over to her, unable, or refusing to, process what had happened before me.

All my happiness and joy, my confessions and feelings, the hours I spent with her, the smiles we shared, pieces upon pieces we played, all of it felt as if it was all so far away like the words she spoke to me only hours ago were in a whole nother lifetime.

I picked up her lifeless body and took her to the far side of the property where we used to spend our days. Although I am far stronger than any man, I felt my limbs trembled as I carried her. I fell to my knee once we got to the spot. I held her close to and cried onto her, sobbing uncontrollably.

I sobbed, accepting that the first and only person I truly loved was gone forever. She had taken my heart, and I feel as if my carelessness had taken her life.

So I promised that I would never share my feeling again. That will never care for another so deeply again. That I will never open my heart again. That I will never indulge myself with things of this world again.

That I will never love again.

It was some time after Sakura’s death before I showed any signs of going back to my old self. I had more arguments with Reiji and even a few with my father, thankfully I wasn’t banished to the Arctic as punishment again.. I yelled at everyone and even fought Subaru out of pure anger of my lost. I wasn’t able to even look at the piano in my room, so I had it moved to another in the house. Whenever I went in there I would lose it and start to rampage around the room, destroying it with sorrowful and hate fueled power.

After what felt like forever, I stopped. I realize like a pathetic child that my tantrums wouldn’t bring my love back to me. I stopped picking fights and damaging the manor. I simply bottled up my emotions once more, like I did before meeting her. I never did put the piano back in the room, it was too much of a reminder of Sakura. So I locked the room it was in, telling myself I had no need to go in. I began to play the piano again, although it was the one at school. I soon became my old self once more, yet the emotions and memories about Sakura never died.

I would never want them to.

* * *

 

**Hikari’s POV**

I raise my head from my knees, my breath refusing to calm itself. I refuse to start crying again, I have had enough of that, but the pain remains. I can’t think properly, the scene just keeps replaying my mind. Shuu’s calm eyes darkened in anger, his voice harsh and threatening, almost as frightening as his words themselves.  _ ‘And if you so much of think of leaving on your own, I swear I’ll make you regret it!’ _

The threat itself is enough to make me shake in fear. His face was twisted in rage, an expression I’ve seen far too many times, yet I never thought I would see it on him. Anger is the source of many actions, so I have no reason to doubt he may hurt me. The mere thought of it is enough to make my pulse rise.

I clench the sleeve of my shirt, trying to stop my shaking fingers. This can’t happen again, never again. Why do I end up make the people I care about mad at me? I don’t want to be hurt again, I don’t want to hurt anymore, so why does it feel as if they are the only thing that happens?

“What are you doing in here?” a voice ask. I jolt and snap my head to direction where the voice came from. It takes me a moment for my eyes to focus on the person in the room. With the moonlight illuminating the room, I see Reiji standing some paces away from the knobless door.

“Reiji…” I say, narrowing my eyes at him in confusion.

“I asked you a question,” he says stern voice.

“I-I don’t know,” I say hesitantly, truly not knowing the purpose for me being in here. I wasn't really thinking what I left Shuu all I knew was that I needed to get away from that room and the vampire. My feet led mean to the room Shuu brought me in earlier this week without my knowing. I didn't know what to do but I had no energy to leave so I just sat on the sofa and tried to compose myself.

“You are not allowed in here,” Reiji says, his eyes narrowed at me. He looks at the door where the knob should be. “Also, explain why the knob is gone.”

I lower my feet onto the floor and look at the glasses wearing vampire. “I didn’t know I wasn’t allowed in here. Shuu opened a few days ago and brought me in here. Doesn’t that mean I can be in here?” I ask the question out of curiosity, not out of a need to pick a fight with Reiji.

He raises his brow at me. “Shuu opened the door and allowed you to come in here, a very exotic lie if any. Shuu hasn’t stepped in this room months.”

I stand up and begin to walk over to the door, my right hand still holding onto the sleeve of my left arm. “I don’t mean to argue with you, Reiji, but that’s the truth. There is no way I could remove the knob. If a door was locked, and I have no idea of what could be in it, I wouldn’t just open it. Shuu really did bring me in here the other day. If you really don’t want me in here, I will leave.”  Not looking up to meet the vampire’s gaze, I walk past the vampire.

I then feel him grip my arm. With my mind being in such a shaken state, my adrenaline immediately spikes. His grip me makes me feel as if I’m being attacked, or I’m going to be soon. Fear courses through my veins and my heart beats loudly. Frightened, I twist and knock off his hand. “No!” I scream.

I stagger backward and trip on my own feet. I fall to the ground with a thud. I quickly look up frantically, my eyes wide with fear. The vampire stares down at me, eyes narrowed. His glare pierces through me and I begin to shake. The level of fear inside me seems to increase and blinds me from what's going on. Thoughts and memories mix together in a mess of emotions and the line between reality and the past fades away.

_ He’s mad, they’re all mad at me. He said he’s going make me regret it, he’s going to beat me, he’s going to hurt me. They are going to hurt, they are going to take their anger out on me. They are going to make me suffer. _

I pull my knees up to my chin and place my hands on my forehead, my face down. I feel my face heat up and my eyes burn. “P-Please, don’t be mad, I’m sorry,” I mumble the words I repeated for months, hoping that it will help the situation. “I’m sorry for making you upset. Please f-f-forgive me, I’m sorry. I b-beg you, don’t hurt me, please don’t hit me. I’m s-s-sorry.”

I feel my breath come out in hard gasp and I’m still shaking. Everything seems to fade away. I no longer hear and feel anything, but I wait. I wait for the whistling sound of something sailing through the air. I wait for the impact to my body, for the flaring feeling on my skin. I’m going to soon smell and taste blood that is going to seep through the opening of my skin. And then I’m going to open my eyes and see either a twisted face fill with anger or the wicked grin of sadistic satisfaction.

I feel something touch me and I tense up instantly and my pleading murmurs stop. It moves up and down on my arm, moving my sleeve slightly. I try to think of what it is, refusing to uncover my face. I then remember the riding crop I was constantly beaten with it. The tongue of it was always brushed against me before it left, only to come back down with a loud  _ ‘whack’ _ against my skin. I wait for it to leave but it doesn’t.

I then hear a stern voice say, “Hikari, move your arms Hikari.” I don’t want to move my arms, to remove my only shield, but I know that refusing an order will only end horribly. Slowly I lower my limbs, but I don’t look up.

I feel a hand move under my chin and I hitch a breath. The hand forces my head up, but I don’t open my eyes. The hiccupping sob in my throat feels as if it's going to choke me. “Hikari, please open your eyes,” the voice says again, but softer this time.

I open my eyelids so I’m looking into a pair of sapphire eyes. I can’t focus on anything but the blue orbs before me.

“M-Master, I-I’m sorry,” I sob with a hoarse voice.

“No, Hikari,” the voice says again. “It’s Shuu.”

“Shuu?” I utter the name as if it is a prayer. In a mere second, everything seems to change. I’m in a room in the vampires’ manor, not a cell. The object that was on my arm wasn’t a tool to inflict pain, but the Shuu’s hands trying to comfort me. And the sapphire blue eyes in front of me don’t belong to Natsume Kei, but to Shuu Sakamaki

But the relief is momentary as I remember the matter at hand: Shuu is still anger with me. “Shuu,” I say again, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you mad. I won't leave, I promise, so please don’t hurt me. I won't think of leaving again, so pl-” I’m unable to finish my sentence. Suddenly, I feel something press against my lips. It is soft and warm and moves slowly against my lips. I then realize that they are another pair of lips. Even stranger, they are Shuu’s. I’m so surprised I don’t react at all.

He breaks the kiss and looks at me. “Don’t apologize,” he says softly. “I’m the one at fault in this situation. I was letting my own emotions and past prevent me from thinking right. I just couldn’t think of losing someone I care about, not again. I was being selfish and...I’m sorry. So please, stop crying.”

I’m barely able to focus on his words, my mind still trying to recover from both my panic attack and the kiss. I just stare at him. He lifts his hands and moves it towards my face. Thankfully, I don’t flinch as he wipes the tears from my face,

“But,” he continues, “you are also at fault. You made me break the rules I set for myself long ago. You have made me show my emotions, to care for something of this world, to open myself up.” He grabs my shoulders and pulls me into his chest, wrapping his arms around me. “You made me love again, Hikari, so you are also to blame for this ordeal.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, backstory, my favorite. Poor Shuu and Hikari and Sakura, well, maybe not Sakura, well…
> 
>  
> 
> Anywho, THERE IT IS, HE KISSED HER! I was planning having the kiss in a later chapter, but a certain reader was spamming me, practically begging me to do it. I usually don't give in like that, but if it makes you people happy.
> 
>  
> 
> But, yeah, OTP confirmed.
> 
>  
> 
> You people have to check out River Flows Through You by Yiruma, it is amazing. This one piano piece was the inspiration of the whole music theme of the story. Tuck Everlasting is a great novel I read in fifth grade. I think that it is very moving and it can relate the my story in a way, which will be brought up in a future chapter.
> 
>  
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> Hope you enjoyed, as always, comment and share my lovelies.


	33. Surprise

“What are you plotting?” I grumble from under my covers. I woke up from a fairly peaceful sleep only for my first sight of the day to be Shuu sitting on the end of my bed, with his back against the bedpost. His eye were closed and he looked half asleep, nothing unusual for the vampire. I instantly buried myself under my covers once we made eye contact.

I don’t want things to be awkward between the two of us, but the memories of yesterday will probably never leave me alone. I was an emotional blob of feelings and tears and I really don’t want to think about it. Especially the kiss and Shuu’s words. I feel myself blush a little as I remember the words he spoke to me. I was so surprised that he felt the same way about me, I was almost too choked up to respond.

“I’m not ‘plotting’ anything,” the vampire says, and I feel the area near me sink in. I quickly sit up, and I bet I look like a kid pretending to be a ghost, blanket still covering my face and body.

“Then why are in my room?” I ask him, facing the direction I heard his voice come from.

“Is it a crime to be in here? Wow, Hikari, I’m really surprised, one day you sobbing that you, and I quote, ‘Have had feelings for me for some time and was too scared to say anything’, and now you don’t want me with you. Are you bipolar or something?”

My face heats up even more as he repeats the words I told he him when we were in the room. Not only is it weird hearing him call me by my name, but his tone has a bit more emotion. I sigh and remove the cover from my face and wrap it over my shoulders. Shuu is in front of me, his expression calm like usual, but I see his lips fight a smile at my flushed face.

“You think you’re so funny,” I mock, staring at the vampire. “Like I asked before, why are you in my room? Honestly, you keep saying that you’re not a pervert like Ayato and Laito, but this is like the third time you were near me when I was sleeping. So if you weren’t watching me sleep, which is creepy as hell, then explain why you are in here.”

“Nice to see that you are back to normal,” he says with sarcasm. “Get ready to go out, don’t take more than an hour. I’ll be waiting in the front.” He gets up from my bed and walks to the door.

It makes me longer than usual to register the works. I stumble out of bed, my foot caught in the sheets. I rush over to Shuu, thankful I didn’t strip off my shirt last night.

“Wait, what do you mean?” I ask once I’m beside him.

He looks down at me and bops me on the back of my head. “I said get ready and don’t take forever. Also, bring a jacket, you’re going to need it”

“Wha-”

“Weren’t you crying the other day about not leaving the manor? If you’re going to keep questioning me, then you can spend your Sunday here,” he says it calmly, not a speck of anger in his voice, but he ends it with his signature sigh.

Anyone would think that he is being cold, but his words feel me with happiness and I feel the energy stream through me. More excited than I have been about anything, I nod my head at the vampire with a huge grin and make my way to my wardrobe to pick something out to wear

I shower quickly, not wanting to waste a second in the shower when I could be heading off the property. I dress in a black and white checkered, long sleeved button up with a pair of jeans. I put on a pair of socks and grab my ankle boots I have yet to wear and the jacket Yui got for me.

I race down the halls and stairs with a spring in my step. I know I'm smiling like a fool, but I can't ease my face muscle to a normal expression. I make it to the kitchen and try to think of the quickest thing I can make for myself.

“Well you're looking nice,” a voice says. I turn around to see Laito leaning against the doorway. His emerald eyes seem to shine brighter than usual and he gives me his mischievous smile. “Is there a special occasion or are you just playing dress up? If that's the case, you could've told me.”

“I have no plans on doing anything you ask for,” I say, bare giving him a glance. I have no intention of ruining my mood to converse with him. I quickly grab an apple from fruit basket in the corner; making a meal will take too long and I doubt I can wait. I walk over the doorway and look at the vampire. “Excuse me,” I say politely yet sternly.

He arches a brow at me. “You never answered my question.”

“I'm leaving,” I say, excitement no longer present in my tone.

His smile only widens. “I don't think that's a good idea, Whore-chan.”  He takes my forearm and steps towards me, cause me to stagger back until my back is against the wall. I try to pull away, but his inhuman strength makes my effort useless.

He undoes the top button of my shirt and moves the fabric aside. Without a second of hesitation, he bites into my skin above the collarbone. I whimper as his fangs break my skin and he draws my blood. I feel some of the liquid bleed out of the piercing, running down my skin.

The vampire releases me from his bite and brings his lips to my ear. “You can cling on Shuu all you want, but remember this, Whore-chan: he won’t always be able to help you, and you are at  _ all  _ of our mercy. Think about that before you want to use him as a guard dog.”

Within a heartbeat, he’s gone and I’m left in the kitchen by myself. I take a deep breath and pick up my dropped fruit. I find a napkin and press it against my wound, not wanting to blood to get on my shirt. I wash my apple and try to distract myself from the words that are no doubt going to ruin my day if I let them linger.

I wonder where Shuu is going to take me; are we just going to go somewhere random or is there a distinct destination he has in mind? I feel the excitement fill me again and my smile returns to my face. I button my shirt and head to the front door, grabbing my jacket off of one of the chairs in the kitchen where I placed it.

I’m immediately hit by the cool night air, making me shiver. As if it was another school day, the limo is parked in front of the manor, awaiting its occupants. I hurry down the stairs and open the door of the vehicle. Shuu sits near the other door, arms crossed over his chest, eyes barely open.

“Ready,” I state, closing the door behind me.

“You take forever,” Shuu says with a sigh,

“Do not,” I protest, taking a bite into the apple in my hand.

I see his nostrils flare a bit. “You smell like blood.”

I put a finger up as I chew. “Laito,” I simply say, taking another bite of the fruit.

“That’s all you’re going to eat?”

I scuff slightly, if only he knew I lived on a diet of malnutrition for a long time. “Yeah, I’m good.”

Shuu shrugs and I feel the vehicle began to move. My smile widens even more and I feel myself bouncing in my seat. Shuu and I sit in a neutral silence for some time, allowing me to eat my apple undisturbed. I roll the window, allowing the night air blow into the limo. I breath it in through my nose, letting the air chill my nose and lungs. We are on a road with trees on both sides of us and the moon shines onto the road.

I look at the apple core in my hand and, without a second of hesitation, chuck it out the window.

“What was that for?” the vampire ask me.

“Compose,” I answer, not moving my face from the window.

“If you keep that up, you’re going to get sick.”

I smile at the vampire. “Will you take care of me again?” I widen my eyes and cock my head to the side, trying to look innocent.

I see his lips tug up slightly and he turns away from me. “Like hell, I would.”

I roll my eyes at him, but I don’t lose my smile. I like this atmosphere, there’s no tension that feel as if it's going to explode, just Shuu and me acting normally to one another. We say what we feel without having to run our words through a filter of any sort.

“Where are we going?’ I ask, a lightness in my tone that can’t help but be noticed.

“Somewhere,” he says calmly. He gazes at me and give me a look as if studying me. “Why are you so excited? Honestly, it's just a trip out.”

“I just haven’t gone out much. When I was younger, Father didn’t grant me as much freedom like Yui, for whatever reason that was. So when I went to the Kei’s house, I was somewhat familiar with it. I spent three and a half years there, never leaving, then I was transferred to the hospital. Five months there, so that’s almost four straight years in the same two places. I had one month between there and the manor, which I left the church only a few times. I was stripped of four extremely important years of my life, so finally going out makes me feel like a kid again.”

Saying the words out loud makes everything sound so horrible. Four years of isolation seems like some kind of punishment. The days did get boring at times and I did feel trapped, but the time only give me the opportunity for many things, such as cooking, reading, learning many different things.

I look over to Shuu, whose expression has softened slightly.

“I know,” I say with a sigh, “my life wasn't’ the best, but that is over. Here and now is what matters, right?” I give a shrug of my shoulders and look out the window. I say this, yet I know that I would never be able to let go of my past, it is something that has formed my being. It is the reason I need to take pills, the reason why I always want a book, the reason why trips like this fill me with excitement, the reason it took me so long to tell Shuu the three, oh-so-special words. I don’t know how much of my past Shuu knows, but I just hope he will accept everything in it if I tell him. But I don’t know if I’m ready for that.

After a moment of silence, Shuu says, “I was pressured as a child.” I turn to him, but his eyes are closed and his head is back. “My mother always wanted me to be the best, to beat all my brother. It was annoying, but I tried to make her happy, but I was never good enough. I ended up rebelling and running away.”

“Did anything come out of it?”

There is a long pause as if he doesn’t want to answer the question. Then he says, “I made a few friends.”

“Running away and meeting a friend,” I say, “just like in the book.”

“Excuse me?” he asks, opening his eyes and looking over at me.

“In _ Tuck Everlasting _ , that’s what happened to Winnie; she ran away from her house because she was being pressured and met Jessie,” I explain. “I finished it by the way.”

“Did you like it?”

“Yeah, I did,” I look up as if gazing into the distance, and place my hand on my chest, “the feels hit, though, they hit hard. But I guess sadness comes when people die.”

“True, but what makes it sad? That the girl died? That Jessie waited so long for her just to find out she was gone?”

I thinking about Shuu’s words, I gaze out the window. “I believe,” I say in a low voice, “that the true tragedy is that he lived, and he knew he had to go on with the reality that the person he loved is gone forever. I think living is far harder than dying.” I sigh and say under my breath, “but at least, he had people to lean on, others don’t.”

Death is something that is all around us, yet we seem to be blinded from it until it strikes near us. Losing someone is a pain that people that have felt it can’t quite shake off, and people that haven’t can’t possibly imagine. I feel my heart ache as I think of Kaname, wishing he was still here. I wonder if Shuu knows the pain of losing a loved one, or, even worse, being the cause of someone’s death.

I feel something intertwined in my hair and pull out as if combing it. I turn around and see Shuu is now beside me, my hair running through his fingers. “Don’t start crying again,” he says calmly, a bit of annoyance in his tone.

“I wasn’t going to,” I say with a smile.

“Yeah, right. Let's put it this way: be happy you’re not the immortal one. If that’s his case, then him and I share more than one pain.”

“Sucks to be you,” I joke, elbowing him slightly.

“My life doesn’t suck that much.” His eyes leave mine and look at the window. “We’re here, roll up your window.”

The mood seems to shift, and I forget the arching feeling in my heart. I feel ecstasy fill me again as I do as Shuu told me and roll up the window. The limo soon stops and Shuu motions for me to get out. I grab my jacket that was laying on the seat and open the door. I step out of the vehicle and take in the area.

It seems like an outdoor plaza of some sort.  There are various stores and places opened, lights shining from the window, music playing softly. Since it is night, the street lights are lit, illuminating walkways. There is a large gateway just ahead of us and a few late night shopper still linger about.

“Wow,” is all I can say. I feel a breeze blow and I shiver, so I decide it's best to put on my jacket.

“Come on,” Shuu says, sticking his hands in the pockets of his pants. I stride over to his side with a smile on my face. We pass through the archway to relieve a courtyard-like area. There are benches to sit on and small stands to get food. Like on the outside, there are several shop with inviting window decor.

“Which one are we going to?” I ask him enthusiastically.

“Hmm, we’ll save that for last,” he says. “You can look around, though, find something interesting.”

My eyes widen alongside my smile. I go over to the other side of him as we walk down a path in front of the various shops. There’s a clothing store with several stylish dresses, coats, and shoes. They’re very nice, but I don’t really need any clothes. We pass a window with various home decor and my eyes linger on the painting of a flower bouquet.

My eyes continue to study the display windows of every shop until one captures my attention. I stop walking and Shuu halts a moment later. He follows my gaze and walks towards the door of the shop. He opens the door and holds it for me. “Coming in?”

I nod and walk into the bookstore, excited to find something interesting to read. The room is warm and bright, inviting all book lovers to journey in further. The smell of book- yes, they do have a smell- fills the air. A soft, instrumental tune plays throughout the store, a light jazz I believe.

There are about two or three late night customers excluding Shuu and myself. I walk in further, ready to begin my search for a new book. I walk through the rows of books, eying every section. I look at the labels on the shelf, trying to find my desired category. Cooking, historical fiction, geography, children's, and much more are organized, ready for a buyer, yet I can’t find American Literature.

“Hey, Shuu, where do think th…” I trail off once I turn around and realize he is no longer by my side. I look around frantically, searching for the vampire. I swear he was behind me just a second ago. I then spot him talking to a worker and I sigh a breath of relief. After a moment, he leaves her and comes back over to me.

“Follow me,” he instructs. Not wanting to be separated again, I walk as close to him as possible. He takes us towards the back where the unpopular books are. On one of the shelf is labeled ‘American Novels’. So he was asking the employee where they were. I give him a knowing smile and a thank you.

I begin to scan the rows of people, determined to find a book that will satisfy me. There are genres of all type, from mystery and murder to romance and tear jerkers. I pull books off the shelf, read the synopsis, but end up placing it right back where I found it.

“Is it that hard to find a book?” Shuu question after my umpteenth reject. “At least, one of them have to be interesting.”

“It's not that they aren’t interesting per se, it is that I want one that will fit my mood,” I explain. “Like this one.” I show him the book _ I Hunt Killers _ . “This seems extremely interesting. A boy’s father is the world's best serial killer and is now locked up. Jasper, the son, now feels as if it's his duty to find the new killer that is striking murder in his town. This sound really intriguing, but I don’t really feel like reading about murder at the moment, although I think murder/mystery is an amazing genre.” I place the book back on the shelf.

“So what are you looking for?”

“Hmm, a happy book. Something that will be funny and uplifting but still has a sad or meaningful undertone.”

Shuu nods his head as if processing the information. He then joins me in the process of removing book from the shelf and analyzing the summary. After a few minutes, he hands me two books.

“These seem interesting,” Shuu says. “One is a girl stalking the recipient of her boyfriend’s heart, which seems to have the sad feeling to it, and the other is about a lesbian movie set design trying to find love, the mystery undertone, I guess.”

I giggle slightly at his rephrasing of the synopsis of the books. I take the books from him and read them myself. Surprisingly they are actually very interesting, I wonder if he knows that he picked up two romances, though. I debate over the two, but end up picking the stalking girlfriend. I put the last reject back on the shelf.

Shuu and I head to the front and purchase the book. The lady hands me my novel in a bag a bids us a good night. I feel a hint of pleasuring having finally own a book of my own. I don’t need to return it to the library or a certain person. No, I’m going to keep it with me forever and the fact that Shuu picked it out makes it all the more special.

Shuu and I head out of the bookstore, although I wish I could stay in there forever. Holding my bagged book, we continue down the path we were previously taken.

“Do you like to read?” I ask my companion.

“Not really,” he says with a shrug of his shoulders.

“But they are so interesting. There are so many different types, something for every person. You can escape into another world, and not have to think of reality. ”

“So you’re going to leave me, how cruel.” He looks down at me with a smirk. And I turn my face in the direction of the path, not wanting the vampire to see my reddening cheeks. We continue to travel down the path when I smell something delectable. I turn my head to see a takoyaki stand, steam swirling from it.

“Are you still hungry?” Shuu ask me.

I look away from the stand. “No.” I’m not lying, but the food is captivating.

“Come on,” he says, heading in the direction of the food.

“No, Shuu, really, I’m good.” I put my hands up in protest. Shuu rolls his eyes and with a sigh, takes my hand, leading me to the taunting stand. He basically drags me over to the stand, mumbling for me to stop being so stubborn. “In a world unfair as this, take whatever luxuries are given to you,” Shuu says, looking up to the night sky.

He orders and pays for the food as I stand beside him awkwardly. He receives the food and we walk over to a bench. He passes me the small, paper holder and I take it from him. I eat the small sphere, astonished by how good they taste.

“Do you want one?” I ask the vampire.

“I don’t need any food,” he says.

“What were the words you told me not too long ago, take luxuries that are given to you? I see you as many things, Shuu, but a hypocrite isn’t one of them.”

He looks over at me with an arched brow. “What do you see me as?”

I open my mouth but close it immediately, not knowing what to say at first. “I see you as a lazy music lover that bottles up his emotions and acts cold but is actually kind and caring.”

He nods his head slowly, as if approving my words. ”Interesting.”

“Oh my,” I say with a dramatic gasp, placing my hand on my chest as a bonus. “Shuu is finding something interesting, the world may be coming to an end. What other phonemes will occur, will Reiji sincerely smile? Maybe Kanato will leave his bear somewhere and not return. Laito maybe even start acting like a gentleman. Yes, maybe those events and more can all occur since Shuu Sakamaki, eldest of the Sakamaki brothers, has found something interesting.” I say it all with a dramatic tone, using hand gestures and expression to emphasize my superfluous shock.

“Don’t make such a big deal out of it.”

“But I can’t imagine it being true,” I say sarcastically. “What else could possibly interest you besides music?”

“Multiple things actually, like you.”  He smirks at me and I turn away, popping another takoyaki into my mouth.

“I’m not a thing,” I say, even though his words feel very warming and cause butterflies to tickle my stomach.

“My apologies,” he says, taking his turn to be sarcastic.

I stab the remaining snack and lean over towards Shuu. He gives me a confused look at first.

“You never answered my question,” I state. “Know you don’t have a choice, so say ‘ah’.” He stares into my eyes, no expression on his face. His blue eyes pierce into me and I feel my face flush. “Open your damn mouth,” I deadpan.

He smiles at my words and opens his mouth. I place the takoyaki in his mouth and he bites it off the pick. I stand and walk over to the nearest trash bin.

“Can we go to the place you brought me here for now?”

“Who said I had a certain place I wanted to go?” he challenges.

“Come on Shuu, you already acknowledged you had a specific shop in mind.”

He smiles and rolls his eyes. He takes the bag with the book in it and then grabs my empty hand. The action makes me freeze for a moment, as I gaze into his eyes. His sapphire orbs and hand seemed to rob me of my words. He squeezes my hand, his warmth seems to melt me. I share his smile as I walk alongside him. His grip is assuring like he’s telling me he's not going to let me go, neither my body nor soul. It is firm and strong, yet calming and comforting.

He leads me down the marbled walkways, guiding me to his destination. He doesn't’ speak, but he doesn’t need to say a word to comfort me. All I need is his presence to make me feel joy and warmth.

We stop in front of a store with a dark oak window frame and door. There are several instruments in the window and a poster about a concert of some sort. I look up at the sign ‘Izayoi’s Instruments’. I look over to Shuu who peers down at me. I’m lost for words as he leads me towards the door and we enter.

The shop is filled with instruments of all kinds, from flutes to electric guitars. There are supplies such as guitar picks, violin strings, and keys for pianos. There is a calming piano solo playing faintly from somewhere in the shop.

“Welcome to Izayoi's Instruments,” a voice says. I look over in the direction it came from. In the corner is a man with electric blue hair. He has a pair of glasses and headphones around his neck. He looks about twenty-five and smiles softly. “Thanks, f-Shuu, is that you?” The main comes closer to us and his face lights up. “Well if it isn’t Shuu, finally coming back to grace me with your presence I see”

“Hey, Izayoi,” Shuu says. “How life treating you.”

“Good,” he says with the nod of his head. By the way they are conversing so easily and the fact they know each other by name, I’m guessing Shuu is a regular customer.

The man, Izayoi, looks down at me with a curious look, as if just noticing my presence. “Who’s this Shuu, your girlfriend?”

Shuu smirked and looks down at me. ‘Something like that.”

“I’m Hikari,” I introduce myself, trying not to let Shuu’s words faze me.

“Izayoi,” he says with a nod. “You’re a music lover too?”

“Yeah, I play the piano and violin. I know mostly classical, but I don’t have any limits.”

“Ah, another classical freak. Was it Shuu that forced it onto you? I swear this kid is always coming here and picking up a classical piece and complaining we don’t have enough of the genre.”

“No, I was just taught it. Besides, it's the most common thing for piano and violin.”

“True. I don’t like it that much myself, my sister loves that stuff, though.”

“Where is Yuzuki?” Shuu asks, looking around the shop.

“She left some time ago, she doesn’t really like the night shift.” He claps his hands together. “Enough of this small talk, what did you come here for?”

“I wanted to get a violin,” Shuu answers. Izayoi and I both give him a questioning look.

“Really?” Izayoi. “After all the time I tried to shove one into your arms, you’re going to calmly come and ask for one. Wow, man, not cool. What made you change your mind?”

“I have my reasons.” Shuu’s eyes never leave me, and Izayoi seems to pick up some untold answer.

“Oh, okay, let's go get one, they are over here.”

He leads us to the area with the stringed instruments. From cellos to violins, the wooden instruments cover the walls. “Okay,” the blue haired man says, rubbing his hands together. “Let’s get started.”

The look over several violins, discussing various things. Shuu hands me one and tells me to hold it as if I’m playing it.

“Wait, I’m getting one?” I ask.

Shuu gives me an ‘are you kidding me’ look, but doesn’t say anything. I’m speechless, his kindness seems to be surprising me once again. I smile and take the instrument from him. I do as I’m instructed and tuck the instrument under my chin and hold it out. “Mmm, I think it’s too big.”

Izayoi says something that causes Shuu to roll his eyes while the other chuckles. This cycle goes on for some time, me holding and sometimes playing the violin, commenting on different things about it. Shuu seems to be doing the same. After a dozen or so, he takes the two that were set aside.

Shuu purchases the two instruments along with cases, the total coming out to an unbelievable amount. I’m about to protest about the purchase when Shuu simply hands the man a card.

“Thanks again, Izayoi,” Shuu says. “You haven’t failed me yet.”

“No problem, and I hope to keep up the streak. Come around again soon, but a bit earlier so you can see Yuzuki. And bring your friend, too, I think Sis will like her.” He flashes me a smile and I reflect it.

We exit the shop, Shuu caring both instruments with ease as I hold the bag with my book. “Thank you so much, Shuu,” I say, my words unable to convey the sheer delight he gives me.

“No problem,” he says nonchalantly.

“What do you mean ‘no problem’? You just spent ov-”

“That doesn’t matter. If you couldn’t tell, money isn’t really an issue in my house.”

I nod, knowing that he does speak the truth. “I’m surprised you don’t already have a violin.”

“I had one before, but that bastard Reiji stole it. I didn’t really want to get a new one after that.”

“What’s different now?”

“I wasn’t planning on getting one for myself originally, but I had no reason not to since we were already there.”

His statement makes me narrow my eyes at him. “So you’re saying that your plan was to buy  _ me  _ a violin?”

“Yeah, thought it would be a proper apology.” He says the words with little emotion, but that is all I take from the words. He thought he had to buy me something for a proper apology, wow. Shuu ceases to surprise me.

“Thanks, but you didn’t have to.”

He gives me a look and says, “I can always turn back around a return it.”

I don’t say anything after that because I don’t know what to. Saying no makes me sound selfish and hypocritical, but encouraging him would be extremely ungrateful.

“I was joking,” he says as if he could detect my inner panic. “Besides, Izayoi wouldn’t allow me to.”

“Do you go there often, you and Izayoi seemed well acquainted.”

“Remember when I told you I ran away?” I nod my head. “Well, he is one of the people I met. That shop used to be his father’s music studio. He taught lessons of all sorts. Even though Izayoi is several years older than me, he was, and still is, a great guy and taught me how to loosen up some. His sister, Yuzuki, and I used to always challenge each other in piano competitions, and it made me feel free. I go ever so often to get a new piece and sometimes just talk.”

I try not to show my surprise, even though I’m completely flabbergasted. I didn’t know Shuu actually conversed with other people. I thought he would be the person that intentionally separates himself from others. Maybe it was different when he was younger. If what he said is true, and there really  isn’t a reason to lie, he was pressured and alone. Maybe he wanted to find people to surround himself with, but as he got older, he no longer need anyone else, just the few he bonded with.

“Do they know about you?” I ask the words leaving my lips before I can stop them.

He shakes his head. “No one but a select few knows about my brothers and myself.”

“Understandable,” I say with a nod.

We walk in silence for some time and I continue to take in the view. I really want to take his hand in mine again, but both of his are occupied with the violins. I offer to take my own, but he tells me not to worry about it. I smile at his kindness. I feel as if I’m seeing a whole new side to Shuu. He still gives me cold remarks and poker faces, but he has also changed a lot. He voices his questions more often, share things I thought he would want to remain unsaid, and allows his words and expression to carry some emotion.

It feels like he is sharing so much with me, yet I barely tell him anything. I don’t have much to say that doesn’t involve the Keis; I doubt he would want to hear about my time there. Besides, I wouldn’t want to mess up the connection between us that took so long to build.

“Would you like to hear another story about rehab?” I ask.

“Sure,” he says.

“During my first month or two, I didn’t really talk to anyone. They told me it wasn’t uncommon for people to want to keep to themselves, although I knew it bothered my therapist. One day I went to the room where all the other patients do ‘activities’. There was this old-time piano in the corner and I desperately wanted to play it. I sat down on the chair, and right before I began, this old lady rolled up in a wheelchair beside the seat. I gave her a small smile and started to play a really simple piece, I can’t remember what it was. I was about fifteen second in when this old hag started  _ bashing _ the key. I stopped playing and move her hands. I gave her that look you give a child when you don’t want them to do something again. I started to play again, but she  _ continued _ to butcher my piece with her nonsensical key smashing. I give her the look again and she says ‘music’. In my head, I was thinking, what you are doing is not music. I once again moved her hands and tried to play. The moment I saw her hands raise, I spoke, and my first words in weeks were, ‘bitch you better not’.” I say the last part with a dramatic amount of sassy. On the contrary, when I said the words, my voice was rough and low.

A sound that seems like a mix of a chuckle and cough comes from Shuu. He presses his lips together to try and prevent a laugh, but it fails him and lets out a low chuckle. His reaction fills me with triumph.

“What the actual hell, Hikari?” Shuu says. “She just wanted to play.”

“Well I did too and I was there first. She had no right to disturb me.” I cross my arms over my chest. I then crack my own smile and let out a soft laugh. “A nurse was about to yell at me for cursing at my elders, but once she realized I spoke, she rushed out of the room. A moment later she came back and took the lady away. Then, after a week of talking to doctors like I was child saying my first words, I went back. I saw the lady and played to her, but I kept her a safe distance away from the piano. She wasn’t the most comforting companion and she was hard to tolerate at first. She didn’t have great memory either, but there was this one thing that touched me. I usually played on Sundays and Thursdays, but one Thursday I didn’t go. She came into my room on her own, her nurse nowhere to be seen. She rolled over to my bed and simply said ‘music’. Even though she was extremely annoying at times and would bother me, I felt upset for not going that day. I got over whatever was bothering me and took her to the room. I played all day and she didn’t try to disturb me once.”

“That was nice,” Shuu says solemnly. “Although that is rude to say about an old lady that probably had Alzheimer's or something.”

_ Damn, Shuu now you’re lecturing me about being rude, what other tricks are you going to pull. _

We walk in a comfortable silence for some time, neither one of us finding it a necessity to speak. I continue to gaze at the various shops and stands, noticing that some are beginning to close. My pace begins to slow as I realize that Shuu and I are heading towards the entrance. Not wanting to be left behind, I catch up to him, although my mood is a bit down.

The limo was waiting for us and we both get in. I look out the window as he drives away from the place of one of the best nights of my life. I sigh, upset I’m probably not going to go there ever again.

Shuu looks over to me and asks, “What’s wrong?”

I want to tell him I don’t want to leave, but I refuse the voice my thoughts. How rude it would be of me ask for more time here when Shuu has already given me so much. He bought me various things, introduced me to a friend, and spoke to me about his past. I shouldn’t need any more than what I have already been given. The place is nice and I’m happy that someone has finally taken me out. And it's even better that I shared this experience with Shuu.

I smile at my new perspective and move closer the Shuu. “Nothing is wrong, actually, it's been perfect. Everything we did was fun and I really enjoyed myself,” I say. I lean over and give him a kiss on his cheek. “Thank you so much for today, I will never forget it.”

He gives me a half smile and pats my head. “That’s good, glad you enjoyed it.”

I lay my head on his shoulder as we drive to the manor. No words can describe the feeling joy and thankfulness I feel because of Shuu. I hope he knows how truly happy he makes me.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh god, that fluff, the major fluff. I hope it wasn’t too much. I also thought that date was pretty cute. No one called it that, but we all know it was a date. I thought that we need a break from all the intense everything that has happened in the previous chapters. I didn’t want it to feel like filler, but a good bonding chapter for Shuu and Hikari. A relationship where the two tease each other but also are very caring and want to make the other happy is the kind I imagined them in from the very start. I hope Shuu doesn’t seem too OC-ish for some. If I could compare him to any other male from a romcom it would be Kou from Ao Haru Ride; cold and harsh at times but overall a caring person
> 
> The books mentioned are I Hunter Killers, Things We Know by Heart (a girl stalking the recipient of her boyfriend’s heart), and Everything Leads to You (lesbian movie set design trying to find love). They are all fantastic books, although Shuu really doesn’t do the last two mercy.
> 
> A reader told me that he wanted more Yui and Subaru and that I was giving Hikari and Shuu too much spotlight. I Do like Yui and Subaru as a couple, but I’m keeping them as a side thing for various reasons. I’m not really good with ‘shy relationship’ stuff. Also, Shuu and Hikari were was my goal and devotion from the very start, the Yui and Subaru drama was there to make the story less reliant on Hikari until the time was right. It also gave both girls much-needed character development. I’m sorry if I made it seem as if it was going to be a lot of Yui and Subaru, but I’m going to use them.
> 
> I will say that next chapter is going to be another Hikari and Shuu. And for everyone who loves her, including me, I’m bringing back Drunk Hikari. Also, there shall be smut.
> 
> Like always, comment your thoughts and continue reading my lovelies.


	34. Playing Around

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh God, I have sinned.

“Have you been avoiding me?” my sister ask me with a concerned look. We are having free time in literature right now, giving her permission to speak with me.  
  
I give her a raised brow. “No…” I say slowly, not sure where the sudden question came from.  
  
“It's just, you didn’t want me to come in your room Saturday and I couldn’t find you yesterday.”  
  
“Oh,” I say with a nod of my head. “Sorry about Saturday, a lot of shit was happening then. I just needed some me time after some stuff with Shuu. On Su-”  
  
“What happened with Shuu?” Yui ask, becoming more alert.  
  
I feel my face heat up as she makes me remember the events of the weekend. “Well, uh, we got in a fight over..stuff. He apologized and took me out Sunday.”  
  
“Wow, that’s great. I was hoping you were going to have some time out of the manor. Where did you guys go?”  
  
I feel butterflies flutter in my stomach as I replay Shuu and mine’s outing the other day. After we got to the manor, I went to my room for some time. Shuu and I then went to the music room, which is what I’m calling it, and played for some time. After that, I left again to complete some unfinished school work. Odd as it was, I joined Kanato for another tea party. He was much calmer than the first one and I actually enjoyed myself. I don’t know whether I was just blinded by lies from the events of earlier or something, but I had an all-around great day yesterday.  
  
“We just went out,” I say with only a small portion of the excitement I still fill. “Forget about me, did you and Subaru patch things up or do I need to continue bothering the guy?”  
  
My sister laughs lightly at the joke, although I’m serious. “Yeah, everything between us is fixed. Thank you for everything, I really do appreciate it all.”  
  
I have a dismissive wave of my hand. “Pft, don’t thank me. Were the two of you able to confuse your never ending love for one another?”  
  
My sister blushes and pushes me lightly. “Please don’t speak about that.”  
  
I smile at sister, but it soon fades once I make eye contact with a certain, red-haired vampire. Ayato and I have some kind of stare down. He looks more pissed off that usual which is kind of odd; what could possibly making him so mad?  
  
“Has Ayato been bothering you?” I question my sister after breaking eye contact with said vampire.  
  
“No more than usual, why?” she says in a questioning tone.  
  
“Just wondering,” I reply vaguely. The chimes soon sound, dismissing the students. “Are you going to have lunch with Subaru today?”  
  
“That’s the plan.”  
  
“Please restrain yourselves from kissing each other.”  
  
“Hikari!” she says in embarrassment. We get out of our seat and head for the door. “I can honestly give you the same advice.”  
  
“Too late,” I say nonchalantly.  
  
“Wha- wait!” she exclaims, confusion and shock written all over her face. I smile and quickly run away before I’m forced to explain things to my dumbfounded sister. Smiling to myself, I make my way towards History.  


* * *

  
  
“Let’s make a bet,” Shuu says as I munch on my last carrot. I entered the music room some time ago, and, sure enough, Shuu was in here. Thankfully he decided he was going to lay on the couch instead of the music bench today.  
  
I get up and throw my plastic bag in the small trash bin. “What kind of bet?” I ask, my interest captured.  
  
“You are about done with the piece we’ve been working on, right?”  
  
“Pretty much. We just need to run through it a few time.” I speak the truth. After numerous sessions of his tutors tutoring sessions, I have just about completed the piece. It actually wasn’t that hard, although there were several moments when I wanted to strangle the rudeness out of the vampire. He seems to criticize or make a joke of everything I do.  
  
“If you can play the piece from start to finish, you win. If you fail, then I win.”  
  
“That’s not fair, we both know I’m not done with it.”  
  
“Okay, how about you get three attempts and play until the last two lines.”  
  
I toss the idea around in my head for some time. “What’s the prize?” I ask with a raised brow.  
  
“Winner gets whatever they want from the loser.”  
  
It is kind of like a punishment, interesting. Honestly, I don’t want to accept. Not only am I still iffy on the piece in general, but I’m sure that Shuu will count a millisecond of hesitation as a failed attempt. But the prize seems to shadow me with a bit of confidence and a goal I surely want. I’ve never been given the chance to have power over someone and the thought is enough of a boost for me to say, “Sure, I’m up for it.”  
  
Shuu smirk as if he heard something funny. He sits up and gestures towards the piano. “Madame jeu.”  
  
A crooked smile crosses my face as I try to hold in my laugh. Did he really just say ‘play, ma’am’ in French. “Tu parle français?” I ask, questioning his ability to speak the foreign language. He seems a bit shocked at my response, which makes me laugh a little. “Désolée,” I apologize as I make my way to the piano. Not shedding my smile, I sit on the bench and lift the piano cover. I stare hard at the sheet of music in from of me. I take a deep breath and begin to play.  
  
I begin the piece, carefully yet swift. I allow my fingers to dance over the keys, trying not to think of messing up. But that is exactly what happens.  
  
Three times.  
  
“Ha, I guess I win,” Shuu says smiling an evil grin.  
  
I turn around with wide eyes and a fake pout. “One more try, please,” I beg.  
  
“Play if you want, but I won the bet.”  
  
I drop my pout and narrow my head at the vampire. Why did I even think I could play this piece properly? I groan and slam my fist on the keys as if they are the reason why I lost the bet.  
  
“I thought that you hated key bashers,” Shuu mocks from the couch.  
  
I clench my jaw, not replying to his comment. I throw my hands up in defeat with another groan. As if I’m melting, I slide off the bench in a sluggish motion and onto the floor with an elongated sigh.  
  
“Get off the floor, it’s disgustingly dirty.”  
  
“Just kill me.” Instead of a smart-ass comeback, Shuu chuckles lowly. I sluggishly look over at him. His elbows are on his knees and he stares at me. “Enlighten me about what’s so funny, I would love my final moments to be spent laughing.”  
  
“You’re lying on the dirty floor, asking to die, and it isn’t the first time either.”  
  
I narrow my eyes at the vampire. It isn’t? I rake through my brain, trying to remember being in a similar incident. I then remember the time I got lost in the hedge labyrinth after being caught at the lake by Ayato. I was laying on the marble walkway, thinking about staying there and hoping no one would come and find me.  
  
I prop myself on my elbows. “Yeah, I remember that now.”  
  
He nods and ask, “Were you always like this?”  
  
“Like what?”  
  
“So...dramatic.”  
  
I laugh dryly at him. “Yeah, I’ve kind have been on the dramatic side.” I remember being the girl that would make a big deal out of everything whenever I got the chance; for comical purposes of course. During my first two years with the Keis, I had to tone it down some so it didn’t come off as disrespect. After that night, when my life changed forever, I didn’t really bring it back out. I guess Shuu is reviving that old part of me.  
  
Shuu starts to hum and his smile widens, snapping me out of my thoughts.  
  
“What is it this time?” I question  
  
“I just remembered that I have yet to punish you after that incident some time back.”  
  
I feel the blood drain from my body as he speaks the words. I have long forgotten about that. Now that I think of it, he’s the only one that hasn’t done anything with the given opportunity. Even Reiji took advantage of it some weeks ago and made me clean his whole lab. I feel a shiver run up my spine as I remember his cold eyes piercing into me the whole time. But the goosebumps don’t leave when I realize that Shuu now has two ‘do anything’ passes.  
  
“What do you have in mind?” I ask hesitantly.  
  
“I don’t know, there are so many things I can do. And my brothers gave me some really good ideas,” he says with a smirk, which doesn’t help my charged nerves. “I guess you’re going need to watch yourself from now on, Hikari.”  
  
I get off the floor and hurry to the other side of the bench, using the seat as a shield. “You scare me,” I deadpan with narrowed eyes.  
  
“But I don’t want you to be scared, no.” In an instant he his crouched beside me, the smirk never leaving his face. “I want you to be terrified.”  
  
I yelp and jolt away from him. I end up kicking the stool and knocking my head against the piano. A throbbing pain flares in the back of my head. I groan and hold the area. “Ow,” I whine. I open one of my clenched eyes to see that Shuu is still smiling.  
  
“You’re not very nice,” I say.  
  
“It doesn’t come easily to me,” he replies. “Besides,” he softly combs his fingers through my hair like he did the night before, “you so much fun to play with.”  
  
I roll my eyes at him, but my cheeks are lightly dusted pink. “Do you have some kind of fixation on my hair?” I ask.  
  
“Mmm, no. It’s soft through.”  
  
His complement doesn’t help calm the heat of my cheeks and I feel my stomach turn. “You’re is, too,” I say, trying to give a compliment of mine own.  
  
He raises a brow at me. “Really?”  
  
“Yeah.” I copy his action and comb my fingers through his orange hair. Like the first time I touched it, it's soft and runs between my fingers like strands of silk. He takes my hand from his hair and into his. He squeezes my hand softly.  
  
“When have you touched my hair?”  
  
I stare into his eyes, confused by the question. I touched his hair...when he bit me that day. I bite my own lip as the memory plays out in my head. The feeling his teeth latched onto my shoulder and his hand clenching my skin. The way his eyes were filled with bloodlust. I don’t want to think of the moment, much less bring it up. So, instead of the truth, I tell him, “You don’t know what I do when you’re sleeping.”  
  
He smirks at me. “So I’m not the only one that takes advantage of sleeping people.”  
  
“WHAT!” I exclaim, but it is drowned out by the chimes. I sigh as the rings inevitably sound out through the room. Shuu seems to have a disappointed look on his face like they chimes have betrayed him in some way.  
  
“I think that they are shortening this period,” Shuu accuses with a sigh.  
  
“Agreed,” I say with a nod. “I can skip, right?”  
  
“Are Reiji’s lectures and extra work fun?” he counters.  
  
I drop my head in defeat. “No. I guess this is when I leave the stage, act’s over.”  
  
“We can always edit the script.”  
  
“Do you want me to leave or not?” I question with a smile.  
  
He rolls his eyes and hits my head lightly. “Go on. I will see you later, anyways.”  
  
I smile, bid farewell to him, and take my leave. I walk down the halls to get to my next class, even though I wish to stay with Shuu. I know we live together and we see one another every so often when we are in the manor, but I just can’t bring myself to ask him for company. Even before all of this, I was in that music room with Shuu, and it has always felt right. Now that we are both being open, it should give me a reason to knock on his bedroom door or ask him to take a walk outside with me.  
  
I also don’t want his brothers seeing us like that. I just find it so odd. We are all in a house together and having two of us showing affection so openly is just...I don’t know. Even when I lived with the Keis, I never displayed my liking for Natsume in front of Kaname or guards. I never felt right showcasing things like that to people that weren’t part of it.  
  
I enter the classroom for Home Ed. The electricity or whatever is working now, so we are going to continue cooking. I take my usual seat in the back of the class and pull out the new book Shuu got me. I flip through the pages to find where I left off.  
  
I’m no more than a paragraph in when someone sits in the seat to my right. I look up to see Laito smirk at me. “Hello, Whore-chan.”  
  
I groan and roll my eyes and continue to read. He moves my face closer to mine, trying to see my face which I hidden in a book.  
  
“Why are you being mean, Whore-chan?” he muses, acting as if he's hurt. “I just want to hear about the date yesterday.”  
  
The word makes me stiffen and I slowly turn towards the fedora wearing vampire. “He took me out of the boring manor, who said it was a date?” Was it really a date? I've never been in one, so I wouldn't know. They're in some of the books I've read, though. I think of things I've read people do on a date. Hang out, share personal information, buy food, one partner usually tries their best to make the other happy as possible, and it usually finishes with a kiss. We did all that! Why does it matter what it's called? Honestly, Hikari, an outing, a date, it's all the same so it really doesn't matter.  
  
“Did you two have fun afterward?” he teases. “Or are you trying to take it slow?”  
  
I feel my face heat up at the question. “Shut up, Laito. I never even said I loved him, so get off my case.” Well, I have said it, but it's not like I announced it to the whole manor. “What I want to do is between Shuu and myself and doesn't concern you.”  
  
He lets out a sigh and looks away from me, staring in front of him. “To be honest, I don't dislike Shuu. Yeah, all my brothers are bastards and I can do without them, but he was never too bad. He only gets annoying when he's upset. Believe me, that's the only outcome if you keep this up. Playing around with a man’s heart isn't nice, Whore-chan. And after last time, I don't think Shuu can deal with another heartbreak.”  
  
“What do you me-”  
  
“Just listen to me, you little slut,” he says cutting me off, his tone turns menacing yet stern. His emerald eyes stare hard and unforgiving at me. “We all know you're nothing but a cocklover. If you want to fuck around, just ask. But don't you mess with that bastard or we’ll all have to pay for your screw up.”  


* * *

  
Shuu’s POV  
  
I pull the bottles off the shelf one by one, searching for something that will meet my standards. This bastard can have all these poisons and drugs, but where are the fun ones? Honestly, what good is this stuff that makes a human roll on the floor in agony? Suffrage like that isn’t even enjoyable. I sigh, closing the cabinet door and opening a new one.  
  
“What are you doing in here?” I hear the all too annoying voice behind me.  
  
“Nothing the concerns you,” I reply to my brother, taking out another small vile.  
  
“It most certainly does, you’re messing in my belongings,” he snaps behind me.  
  
I groan and turn around, staring hard at Reiji. “Where are the fun drugs?”  
  
“Fun drugs?” he echoes with narrowed eyes. “Shuu, what the hell are you speaking about?”  
  
“I thought you were smart. The ones you always gave to Ayato and Laito that basically made people drunk.”  
  
“I never gave my stuff to those dimwits, they stole them. Furthermore, what do you need it for?”  
  
“Never mind,” I say. I hold up a small vial. “Found it.”  
  
“Sh-”  
  
“Just shut up and stop trying to ruin my fun,” I snap at my younger brother. “What wrong am I doing if you do the same?”  
  
He narrows his red eyes at me, but they never intimidated me. “I can care less about whatever you do with that girl. But believe me, when I tell you that I will not break any of the rules that were set long ago from this one bride. She is livestock the rest, they come and go, that is the cycle. If I have to certain measures, don’t think for a second I will hesitate just because you haven’t learned from your past mistake.”  
  
I pocket the small bottle and walk towards my brother. “I know the only reason you try to shove the rules in our face is because you were the first person who tried to break them,” I say before walking past my brother and out his lab. I swear, sometimes I just want to punch the hypocrisy out of him because it is so damn annoying.  
  
I make my way down the halls, deciding how exactly going to go through with my plan. The first step is to get the victim. I smile to myself as I head towards Hikari’s room. Once I get to the room, I take the knob in my hand and open the door. “I’m coming in,” I announce as I open the door.  
  
I enter the room looking around for the brunette. I hear the CD player playing the disc that has Chopin’s Nocturne in Eb. Hikari isn’t in the room, but the bathroom door is open and I hear the faucet running. I take a step in closing the door behind me.  
  
“Yui?” I hear a voice ask from inside the bathroom. A second later Hikari steps out of the bathroom, a cup of water in her hand. She is wearing a lavender shirt and a pair of black jeans. Her hair is in a bun, bangs still covering some of her foreheads. We lock eyes and she quickly looks away. “Oh, Shuu, I didn’t know you were in here.”  
  
“I said I was coming in,” I counter.  
  
“I didn’t hear you, sorry,” she says walking over to her bed. She places the cup of water by a bottle of pills. I guess she was about to take her medication. “What’s up?”  
  
“I came to ask if you want to brush up on Chopin’s Nocturne in Eb. After today, it seems like you still need some reviewing.”  
  
She gives me a pissed expression as I smirk at her. “You really are something,” she huffs. “Sure, I’ll be in the room in a bit, I need to finish some stuff up first.”  
  
I nod my head and leave the girl to her work. I then head to the kitchen searching for a familiar. Where do those things always go? It is so aggravating searching for the things. “Tanaka,” I call out. A moment later, the humanoid familiar comes. I pass the butler and instruct him on what I want to be done. He nods and disappears with a bow.  
  
I smile, trusting that the familiar can make do with the simple commands. I go to the room with the piano. It is becoming easier and easier to come in here. It no longer feels like a taboo to enter the room. I thought that entering coming in here was like betraying my feeling for Sakura, but it is no longer like that. I don’t know how she truly felt about me. I like to tell myself that she loved me and that she was a bit conflicted, even though I’m not sure it’s the truth. I just know that she would want me to be happy, regardless of the internal battle she may have been fighting in.  
  
I lay down on the couch, waiting for Hikari to come in. I close my eyes thinking about what exactly I'm doing. I never really thought it was a good to drug a person especially since I never found it much fun, unlike my brothers. But when I was at school today with Hikari, I started thinking of my past experiences with her. The day she yelled at us all and I found her drunk on the kitchen floor came into mind almost immediately. Although she was an emotional blob, it was a bit amusing seeing her yell at a bottle and look so helpless. Aside from the tears, I found the whole situation a bit funny.  
  
So why not reenact it? I doubt that Hikari would come ever come next to a cup of wine again, so I have to play around it.  
  
The door to the room creaks up and Hikari comes in as if summoned by thought. She catches my gaze and gives me a small smile before looking behind her. “You should really put a knob back on that door,” she says casually. She makes her way towards the shelf that has the music sheets. “You have a copy of Chopin’s Nocturne in Eb, right?” she asks as she searches the shelf.  
  
I get off the couch and walk over to the shelf. I take the paper off the top shelf and hand them to the girl. She thanks me and walks over to the piano, placing the sheets on the display. I stand behind her as she sits down on the seat. She begins the piece, playing perfectly at first. I instruct her on where she’s messing up, making her review the specific areas multiple times.  
  
After about forty-five minutes, the door open. Hikari and I both turn around to see Tanaka coming into the room with a tray. It has a bowl of soup and bread on it. He places it on the small table next to the sofa. He bows and leaves the room without a word.  
  
“What is James bring?” Hikari asks softly.  
  
“James?” I question her with a raised brow.  
  
“Oh, I didn’t know his name, so I named him after a butler in a book I read.”  
  
“Huh, well, he’s Tanaka, and he brought you some food.” She gives me a questioning look. “You can take a break and eat.”  
  
She gets off the bench and walks over to the food. She takes the bowl of soup and begins to eat it little by little. She soon finishes her meal and places the bowl back on the tray. She rises from the sofa and make her way about over to the piano.  
  
“Okay,” she says, clapping her hands together. “We are going to go through this a few more times and then I’m going to head to bed.”  
  
“Sure,” I say with a shrug and go over to lay down on the sofa. She plays through the piece a twice. One her third go, though, her rhythm is gone. I look over and notice she is swaying more than usual and her fingers and running over each other.  
  
I smile inwardly as her movements become more sluggish. I ready myself for what may soon come. I just hope she doesn’t start crying again or this whole thing will become annoying.  
  
“Shuu~” the girl says in a sing-song tone. “Shuu, that is just a funny name,” she laughs and I raise a brow at the drugged girl. “It’s the same way you say footwear in English. Your parents most have really hated you.”  
  
“I don’t know about that,” I say with a shrug.  
  
“Shh,” she says putting her finger on her lip. “Shh, shh, hush I'm talking...I'm talk. I have this theory; if I get pixie dust, and wish really hard, I can fly. I think we should try it out.”  
  
“Hikari, we do-”  
  
“Shut up,” she slurs. “I'm not Hikari, my name is Komori, got it right. You can either call me ‘my beloved’ or ‘Aphrodite', one and the other. Now, where's the pixie dust, because this motherfucker is going to fly.”  
  
I chuckle at the girl’s looney actions. I don't know which is more amusing that she is asking me to call her the goddess of love or she is trying to find fairies.  
  
She stands up on the piano bench with wobbly knees. I'm about to get up and make sure she doesn't fall but she puts a handout. “Don't you move you monster, you'll scare away the pixies,” she snaps. “Pixies!” she screams. “Where are you guys?!”  
  
“Hik-”  
  
“That's not me name.”  
  
I sigh. “My darling Aphrodite, please stop screaming. You will make all the fairies wet themselves and never come back.”  
  
She narrows her eyes at me. “How do you now that, Sakamaki?”  
  
“Because I'm an expert,” I say slyly.  
  
Her face lightens up at the lie. “Can you fly?”  
  
“Yeah, but I will do that another day.”  
  
She nods and lowers herself back on the seat. I sigh a breath of relief, letting out the bit of panic I held. She reclines on the bench, staring up to the ceiling.  
  
“If I'm Aphrodite, who are you?”  
  
“I'm not really good at mythology.”  
  
“I think you're Apollo.”  
  
“Why is that?”  
  
“You like music. And Laito is Zeus.”  
  
“I doubt Laito is an all-powerful ruler.”  
  
“Nah,” she says, letting her hand fall off the side of the bench. “It's because he fucks around and doesn't know how to keep it in his toga.”  
  
“Interesting.”  
  
“You're not interested in anything, you're a lazy-ass.”  
  
“I thought I was Apollo,” I counter, continuing with the nonsensical game she's playing.  
  
“Do you know what you are?” In a very sluggish manner, Hikari gets off of the piano bench. She moves over to me, staggering a little. She sways back and forth as if on an unsteady boat. By the time she closes to space between us, she seems like she can’t take another step. She falls onto my lap like a rag doll. She smiles up at me, her cheeks tinted pink.  
  
“You, my lovely lazy-ass, are sexy as fudge, you know that?” she slurs. I chuckle at her comment. “I’m not playing.” She rubs her hands against me, her butt swaying in the air. She looks like some kind of cat, stalking their prey. She slides her hands up my chest, not breaking eye contact. She leans into my ear and whispers, “And chocolate is pretty damn sexy.” She moves her hands to the hem of my shirt and tugs it off with a smile.  
  
“I’m stealing your shirt, Shuu,” she tease with a smile. She moves off of me and waves the sweater in the air like a flag. “I have your shirt, I have your shirt.” She then looks at me and notices my button up undershirt. She pouts at me and falls to her knees in one swift motion. “You’re wearing two shirts? Shuu~ that’s no fun,” she whines at me.  
  
She then stares into nothingness. Her silence makes me a bit worried. “Hikari?”  
  
“How are you wearing two shirts?” she questions again shaking her head. “It’s...it’s so hot.” She begins to peel off her lavender top, revealing her olive skin and red bra with black trimming. I smirk, approving her choice in underwear.  
  
On her hands and knees, she makes her way back over to me. She still sways her ass as she comes closer and closer to me. She then straddles me and pushes me so I’m laying down. She climbs onto the end of the couch and over to me. Seductively, she smiles down at me, lust notably flaring in her eyes.  
  
“Aren’t you hot, too?” she asked, practically purring. She begins to unbutton my shirt one by one. Once open, she spreads the fabric away from my toned stomach. She slides her soft hands over my stomach. Her palms and fingers smoothing over me.  
  
She leans down and plants a kiss on my abs. She trails her kiss up my torso and up my neck. Each on soft like the touch of a feather. Her actions bewilder me. The only person I ever had this kind of interaction with was Sakura, and she wasn’t even this controlling our last night.  
  
I’m taken from my thoughts as she snatched my lips with hers. She cups my cheeks, intensifying the kiss. I wrap my arm around her waist and let my fingers tangle in her hair with my free hand. I tug at it, making her gasp. I take the opportunity to snake my tongue into her mouth, letting my tongue explore. She moans into the kiss, also allowing her fingers to travel in my hair.  
  
She pulls away from the kiss, breathing heavily. She begins to grind her hips on me, making me groan. She smirks down at me wickedly. In a skillful manner, she slides moves her hips over my groin. Even with the layers between us, the friction against my crotch causes my member to harden. She moves her hands from my abdomen to her own body. She moves her hands over her body, bottom lip between her teeth. She lets out a moan as she cups her breast and begins to massage them in a lewd way.  
  
“Enjoying the view, Shuu?” she muses at me.  
  
I won't lie to the girl, it feels pretty damn amazing. “I am,” I say. “But,” I grip her hips and sit up. This cause her to fall onto the couch, no longer on top of me. “I prefer to be the one in control,” I say, pressing my covered erection against her.  
  
She moans lustfully. She grips my arms that are now on either side of her. She looks up at me, her large, pink eyes not losing their flare. “Shuu,” she breathes out, “I want you.”  
  
The words are like a prayer to my ears. And I happily accept them. I pick up the girl bridal style. In an instant, we are in my room. I put her down and take her lips in mine. We kiss passionately as if we are one another's lifeline. We are soon on my bed, hands in each other’s hair. We break the kiss only to breathe.  
  
I flip us over so she is no longer on me. She lays with her back on the bed, flushed face staring up me. I move so one of my legs are between hers and my hands are above her shoulders. Her stomach rises and falls as she tries to regain her breath. I trail my fingers over her smooth stomach. The tips of my fingers brush over the hard skin of her scars. Not wanting to pay attention to the reminders of the past, I move my hands over to her side. She gasp and flinches, so I know this area is sensitive.  
  
I teasingly move my fingers up to her bra. I hook the strap with my finger and pull at it. I let it go, letting it snap back down on the girl and she lets out a soft groan. I don’t know if she was planning anything like this, but I noticed that her bra unhooks from the front. Doesn’t matter, makes my life easier. I unhook the undergarment, revealing her breast.  
  
I smirk as I take on in my hand and she lets out a moan. I massage the mound, feeling the soft skin under my hands. “I’m surprised, Hikari,” I say. “I knew you weren’t lacking in the upper region, but these are quite impressive.”  
  
I take the tip between my fingers, pinching the small flesh. She gasp, the lewd sound going straight to my already throbbing groin. I twist at the flesh of one mound as I take the other between my teeth. She moans, arching her back in pleasure. I smirk and release the soon to be swollen flesh. I kiss over them, allowing my lips to barely touch her skin before moving them away.  
  
“Sh-ah-uu,” she moans, stilling breathing heavily as if the air is escaping her. I smirk and trail my fingers back down her sides. I stop when my finger gets to the hem of her pants. I grab the fabric and beginning to peel it off her body. I uncover her matching half of her underwear, a highly noticeable wet spot in the center.  
  
“Wh-Why are you stealing my clothes?” she pants, making me chuckles lowly.  
  
“Because you look better without them,” I say in a low voice.  
  
“I bet you would, too,” she says. I take this as the hint she also wants me to remove my clothing. I shrug my shirt off my shoulder and reach to do the same with my pants. I then feel a pair of hands over mine. I look up into Hikari dark pink eyes.  
  
“I want to,” she says. I give her a look, but her eyes won't avert mine. I move my hands, allowing her to do as she please. I don’t feel like arguing with her, especially when she’s drugged and horny. As if she’s done it a million times, she unbuckles my belt and tosses it to the side. She pushes me down, making it easier for her to divest me. She tugs my pants off with ease, leaving us both in our underwear.  
  
She eyes my hidden erection. “That looks painful,” she states with a smirk. She strokes the bulge in my underwear, and I let out a soft groan. She slides a finger under the fabric hem and pulls at it. “I’ll help relieve the pain.” She nearly tears the fabric as she frees my hardened member.  
  
“And you thought my breast were impressive,” she says. She forcefully grabs my shaft and lowers herself to the region. “I didn’t know you were so needy, Shuu.” Her thumb slides over the tips, coating her finger in the pre-cum that was drooling out. She moves her finger over my slit a few times, making me groan a bit each time. She begins to pump my shaft, the friction causing waves of pleasure to flow throughout my body.  
  
After a few merciless strokes, I feel her tongue lick my sip. The wet muscles, travels down my length, leaving a wet trail. She works back up, sucking hard on the head. Without an ounce of hesitation, she takes my full length in her mouth. I let a moan leave my lips and unconsciously thrust upwards. I never felt this much pleasure before and we haven't even finished yet. She does everything so skillfully and with such confidence.  
  
I moan as I feel myself reach the back of her throat. She slowly raises her head to the top of my erection. She swirls her tongue over the head before taking it back into my mouth. She bobs her head up and down, almost taking me to the base each time. I see one over her hands travel down to her panties. She lets out a moan, the vibration only intensifying the euphoria I’m feeling.  
  
She released my member from her mouth, grabbing it once again with her hand. “How is it Shuu?” she ask with a wicked grin. “You look like you’re going to blow any second. Are you really not going to be able to..ah...go all the way? That’s a very sad thought...mha.”  
  
I smirk as I sit up, causing her to do the same. I push her down so I’m now the one on top. “I let you had your fun,” I with a smirk. “But I’m far from down.” I take one of her breast in my mouth, biting the nipple once more. She lets out an erotic gasp and I can even feel her goosebumps, yet she's burning up. I let my hand makes its way down to her remaining clothing. I slide my hand under the fabric, my fingers immediately feeling the wetness of the region.  
  
“Ngh...Sh-ah-uu,” Hikari moans.  
  
“Who is the needy one now?” I question, sliding two fingers over sensitive area. She lets out a loud moans, her back arching in pleasure. “Not only that, but your underwear is completely drenched.” I remove said article of clothing, leaving her completely naked.  
  
I easily slide two fingers in her and she lets out another lewd noise. I feel her walls clench down on my digits as I easily slide them in and out of her. With every thrust of my fingers, a moan or gasp would leave her lips. I add another finger, causing her to squirm.  
  
“Mmh..Sh..ngh...Shuu please st-ah-op playing with me, I’m...ngh...not a da-ah-mn piano,” she says between her moans and pants of pleasure.  
  
“Oh, but I love the sounds you make,” I say with a sly grin. “It's like music to my ears.” I give another deep thrust of my fingers, make her cry out in pleasure.  
  
“Shuu pl-ah-please, I....I need it, please,” she begs which only makes the situation more erotic.  
  
“What do you want, Hikari?” I ask, stopping the movement of my fingers. She lets out a whine and thrusts her hips, yearning for the motion to continue.  
  
“Shuu, please, I want you.”  
  
“But I’m right here I,” I tease with a smirk.  
  
“Please, Shuu, I want you in me.”  
  
“I already am.” I give a small, teasing thrust into her. “If you want something Hikari, you have to tell me exactly what you want.”  
  
“Shuu just fuck me already!” she demands, breath still coming out hard.  
  
“Hmm, I don’t like your tone; try again,” I say as I remove my fingers from her.  
  
“Please, Shuu, just fuck me. I need your hard cock inside of me. Please, Shuu, I’m begging you, please, I need something inside me. I want you to fuck me so hard I can’t even leave the room. I want to feel you hot dick in me, if I don’t I will die. Please, Shuu, don’t make me wait, I need something inside me. Bang me into the fucking mattress, goddammit. I want to be able to feel you even after we're done. I just need you inside me, please.”  
  
I’m left speechless by Hikari’s pleads, but they feel me with a pleasure I can’t ignore. I smirk at the panting girl under me. I widen the space between her legs, allowing me more room. I position myself in front of her entrance. I slide my member in her, feeling her walls immediately clench down on me.  
  
I groan once I get to my base. She lets out another loud, lustful cry, back arching in pleasure. I feel my member being squeezed inside her, making me let out my own lewd moan. It has been months since I’ve been inside a person, making the pleasure more intense than ever.  
  
I lean over, capturing Hikari’s lips in mine. She moans into the kiss as we kiss intensely. I break away from the kiss to gaze into her beautiful eyes. I begin to thrust into her slowly, getting into the motion. My partner gasps under, arms wrapping around me. I begin to quicken my movement, thrusting my hips more forcefully into her.  
  
Soon, the room is filled with the sound of our moans and cries of pleasure and the sound of flesh hitting flesh. Hikari’s arms never leave me, as if holding to make sure I won't leave.  
  
“Ngh...Shuu,” she cries, my name coming out as a gasp for air. “Hah..harder,” she pleads through her erotic pants. I eagerly apply, quickening my pace, yet getting deeper with each thrust.  
  
The brunette moans shamelessly, breath coming out in hard, hot breaths. “Shuu, pah-please, I'm...I'm,” she is unable to finish her sentence, the pleasure cutting her off. There is no need for her to continue because I'm also near my end.  
  
I can feel her hot walls tightening around me, making me groan loudly. She snaps her head back, back raising off the mattress as she calls out my name. “Shuu~” she cries out as she reaches her limits.  
  
I give a few more thrust as I too reach my climax. I pull out just as I feel myself release. A tremor seems to run through me as I shoot my seeds out onto the panting girl. For a moment, I only see white and everything seems muted. I soon come down from my high, breath and energy seemingly disappearing.  
  
I look down at Hikari who seems to still be having trouble catching her breath. I find one of my shirts and wipe her clean.  
  
I pull the sheets from under Hikari from under her and lay them over her. Too tired to even find my discarded underwear, I climb under the sheets also. I close my eyes, but soon feel a body against mine.  
  
I open my eyes and look down to see Hikari cuddling against me, reminding me of the last time we shared a bed together. I wrap my arm around her, pulling her in closer. I kiss the top of her head when I hear her softly breathing against my chest.  
  
“Sleep soundly, my beloved,” I muse as I close my eyes and drift off into sleep.

 


	35. Touble

 

**Hikari’s POV**

I’ve been woken up by many things. By someone shaking me, yelling, and beating. By the sound of thunder, footsteps, and laughter. I was taken from my sleep by things such as the smell of food or sudden pain.

But never have I been woken up my music. Even with sleepiness still fogging my senses, I can detect one of Beethoven's works playing near me.  _ Fur Elise, _ far too iconic to forget. Slowly, I open my eyes, yawning in the process. I sit up in my bed and look around.

I rub my eyes in disbelief when I survey the room. I’m not in my bedroom, but the familiar green themed one that belongs to Shuu. I look down and notice that I have an emerald green sheet over me instead of my usual purple. I also lack any clothing on my upper half, so I quickly pull the covers up to my chin.  Why am I in here?

I’m taken from my thoughts when I hear a groan by my side. There's a movement beside me and I turn to see Shuu sluggishly rising from under the covers. He reaches over and smacks his bedside table a few times before his palm lands on the clock near him. I stare at his bare back, noting how defined it is. His lower half is still under the covers, although they seem to be falling down.

Slowly, his head turns in my direction. We lock eyes, neither one of us speaking for what seems like an eternity. “Mornin’,” he says with a yawn.

“It’s not morning,” I reply. “You already did this to me once before.”

“Yeah, just seeing if you were going to fall for it again.” He seems to stare off into space for some time. As is shot, he falls right back on the bed with another groan.

“Shuu?” I question. “Aren’t you going to get up?”

“The first part of me waking up is spent wishing I was still sleeping,” he says. “I think I still am because I doubt this is real.”

“What?”

“You being in here,” he says.

“You expected me to leave?”

He doesn’t answer, he only closes his eyes. I sigh myself, not knowing what to do. Little by little, hazy memories of yesterday drift into my mind. I was playing the piano with Shuu, ate, then, then what? All I can come up with that that is that we...did it. The thought makes me feel queasy. After what Laito said, it makes me feel so slutty. Why, how, what even happen to make me go that far? It hasn’t even been a week since I said anything about my feelings, now I’m having sex.

“Hikari?” Shuu says with no emotion in his voice.

“Hmm,” I hum, not looking to the vampire.

“Are you okay?” I hear the hint of worry in his words.

I wish I knew the answer to the question. Am I really okay? I don’t think I’ve ever been. So I do what I‘ve been doing for some time now, I cover my emotions I don’t want people to see. To put on the mask I wear so well and so often it feels more like a second skin. “Yeah, I’m good. What time is it?”

“6:28,” the vampire answers.

“Why do you wake up so early?”

“I...do not...know,” he says eerily like he isn't sure of his words. He covers his eyes with his arm like he is going back to sleep. I’m about to slide out of bed, but then I notice I’m completely naked. I feel my face flush at the thought. Oh god, it has been forever since I had to go through the post-sex stages.

“Um, Shuu,” I say.

“Hm?”

“Uh...where are my...clothes?” I ask slowly. I look around the room and on the floor, searching for my own clothing.

“I don’t think you need them,” he says slyly and I see a smile working on his face.

I find an article of clothing on the floor near me. I lean over and pick it up, and it turns out to be Shuu’s underwear. I roll my eyes and look back at the vampire. My face flushes more when I come to the realization that he’s probably also naked.

“Shuu, put on some clothes!” I snap, hitting him with his own underwear repeatedly. He groans and rolls over, grabbing a pillow to shield himself from my attack.

“I can say the same thing, but I’m not complaining,” he groans once I finally throw the clothing at him.

“I would, but I don’t know where they are. And I refuse to leave this bed naked.”

“Mm, why not?” he teases.

“SHUU!” I shout, my face red with embarrassment.

I see his smile grow slightly as he lets out a sigh. He sits up and grabs the underwear I was using as a weapon not too long ago. He moves so he is sitting on the edge of the bed, feet on the floor. He slides on his underwear to his thigh. When he stands to pull them up to his waist, I catch a glimpse of his butt. I snicker softly and look away.

“What?” he questions, turning to look at me.

“Nothing,” I muse with a smile.

“If you don't say it, you're not getting your clothes.”

I narrow my eyes at him and raise his brow, challenging me. “Well…” I say, “you have a nice ass.”

He looks taken back by the comment. He makes a what-the-fuck face and shakes his head slowly. He then rolls his eyes and begins to travel the room, collecting clothing. The first thing he picks up are my panties and I try not to blush more than I already am. He makes a remark that I probably don’t want to put them on and I don’t argue. He then tosses me my black jeans and I mouthed a thank you. I shift in the bed and put the pants on. I keep the covers over my breast, still not comfortable exposing them.

I watch him as he collects the clothes, studying his mostly exposed body. He doesn't have too large of a frame, but his muscles are noticeable. His legs, like his upper body, look strong in structure, yet lean in size. But I can't stop staring at his nearly perfect butt. Why the hell does he have such a round, yet firm, ass?

“Hey!” Shuu shouts, gaining my attention. “Stop ogling me like I'm eye candy.”

“More like man candy,” I mutter under my breath.

The words don't go unheard because the vampire gives me a hard stare. He bends over and when he straights, I see he has picked up my bra. “I would love to see something myself,” he saws, holding up the undergarment with a smile playing on his lips.

“Shuu, give me my bra,” I say sternly.

“Nah, I will hang onto it until you come and get it. I do think you have a tasteful sense for underwear, I may just keep them”

“I’m not playing, I want my clothes. Just give them to me,” I say in annoyance, unamused with his antics.

“Gotta beg for it.”

“Beg!” I echo in shock.

He sighs and shakes his head. “You were much better at this earlier.”

“I’m not begging for my clothes, I’m not a dog.”

“You can be my bitch,” he says slyly.

“That’s it!” I shout. I throw off the sheets and hurry over to the vampire, my arm over my exposed chest. He smirks and takes a few steps back as I rush towards him. I reach out with my free arm to get the article of clothing, but he keeps raising it higher.

“Shuu, please give me the bra,” I say in frustration. He only shakes his head, raising said clothing high so it is out of my reach.

“Gotta jump,” he teases.

“Like hell, I would!”

“You should try, it could prove effective.”

“I’m not! You’re such a perv. My boobs aren’t for toying with.”

“I can object.”

“FUCK YOU!”

“I don’t know about that, but I have no problem on fucking you again.”

“ASSHOLE!”

“I never tried anal.”

His perverted statements bring a whole new wave of embarrassment over me. I open and close my mouth, incapable of forming words. I press my lips together and lower myself to the ground. I lift my knees up to my head and rest my head on them.

“Hikari?” he says softly.

“I...just...can’t with you,” I say slowly. The redness of my face has traveled to the tips of my ears and I know I can no longer even look at Shuu. It’s like I overheated and can no longer function. I soon feel something graze my side. It tickles me, making me flinch and let out a laugh. It comes again, tickling my side a bit more. A giggle escapes my lips and I look up at the culprit.

Shuu smiles down at me and I roll my eyes at the vampire. “I don’t like being tickled.”

“We all have to step out of our comfort zones,” he replies. With his guard down, I’m able to snatch my bra from his hand at last. I stick my tongue out at him like a child and put on the undergarment, which makes me feel much more comfortable.

Shuu gets up and walks to his dresser, retrieving a white, button-up shirt. As he does this, I look around for my own top. “Uh, Shuu, where’s my shirt?”

For a moment, it looks like he is thinking over the question like the answer is just out of reach. “I believe it’s still in the music room.”

“I’m not even going to ask why it’s in there,” I say with a sigh as I raise from the floor. I jump back onto the vampire’s plush bed, allowing the soft bedding to consume me. I let out a soft sigh as I nuzzle into the covers.

“What are you doing?” Shuu questions, his footsteps coming close.

“There’s no reason for me to be up this early, so I’m going about to sleep,” I answer, trying to go back to a restful state. I know sleep as long left me and it won't return until later, but I don't want to do anything at the moment. The area next to me sinks in and the now familiar feeling of fingers combing my hair joins soon after.

“Hikari, is something actually bothering you?”

“No,” I lie once more to Shuu. Not only am I still trying to accept that we did have sex, but my thoughts are also plagued with what Liato said yesterday. What did he mean when he said that Shuu can’t deal with another heartbreak? Did he already like someone, was it recent? When Laito said ‘last time’, does he mean there was more than one heartbreak for Shuu?

“What are you thinking about?” Shuu ask.

“Nothing.”

“Don’t lie to me. You’re too quiet to be thinking about nothing.” The combing fingers stop and I can feel his hard eyes staring into me. Dammit, he knows I’m lying and he isn’t going to take another one.

“Why do you like me?” The question is voiced before I even think about it. A wave of uneasiness soon washes over me and I’m soon in a sea of regret. I don’t breathe or move a limb, the only things in motion are my racing mind and pounding heart.

“You’ve interested me since I first saw you,” Shuu says after a long moment of silence. “Isn’t that how it all starts, by finding interest in something or someone? I can’t explain when down the line it became more than that, but I somehow come to the realization that what I felt wasn't just deep interest.”

I’m taken back by his words. I didn’t think he would give me an answer of any sort.

“But that doesn’t really answer your question of why I feel what I feel. There are many things about you that I like, can’t you see them?”

I remain silent, not wanting to answer the question. I feel like I can’t lie to him after his touching words like would be the worst thing I could possibly do. I’m too hesitant to speak the truth that eats me away at times. The question my therapist ask me so many times it burns like acid when I hear it. Not uttering a word my only resort.

“Hikari?”

“It’s not like you to be so sentimental,” I say, my voice void of emotion. I raise my face from the covers it was buried in and look at Shuu. He face shows a bit of suspicion as if he knows that I’m trying to cover something. His sapphire blue eyes gaze at me with a look of sympathy, a look I was given far too many times for my liking. I give him the same false smile I gave the nurses and therapist, hoping it is enough to remove the apprehension from the situation.

“Can you braid?” I ask randomly.

The vampire raises a brow, question my attempt to change the subject. He seems to let it slide as he nods his head.

“You do?” I gawk, stunned by the answer.

“You don’t?” he counters.

“I know how, it’s just hard. My hair was much longer not too long ago, and I’m not used to braiding short hair.”

“Sit up,” he says with a sigh. I do as he says and rise from my laying position. I cross my legs and sit with my bare back towards him. I feel him take my hair in his hand and begin to twist it in a braid. His fingers are quick and diligent like they’ve been performing the task since birth.

“How come you know how to braid hair?” I question.

“Do you not see this mess of hair I have to work with?” he questions like it is the most obvious thing in the world. I giggle at his joke, but I don’t bother to ask for the real reason. “Do you have a hair tie?” I nod and fish one out of my pocket. I hand him the requested object. “So you just carry around hair ties?”

“Yeah,” I answer with no further explanation. He knots the braidd at the end of the bread to keep it secure.

“Are you going to your room now?” the vampire as once he’s done.

“Are you trying to kick me out now?”

“I’m just asking a question,” Shuu says in his usual annoyed voice. The tone actually makes me feel better, knowing he’s being his normal self.

“I need to get my shirt from the music room, but I rather not leave you room like this.” I gesture towards my exposed upper body.

He nods and gets off of the bed, making the journey to his dresser once again. He fishes something out and return back to the bedside. He tosses me the white garment and I catch it. I open it and realize it is a white t-shirt. I give a smile to the vampire and slip on the shirt. It is a bit large for me, but it is only temporary.

“Thanks,” I say, standing up from the bed. I look in his eyes, hoping mine don’t show the discomfort I’m feeling. I do love Shuu, but I know there are many things that trouble the both of us, making our feeling difficult to convey. But no matter how much trouble I have, I want him to know that I do have these feeling for him. I step closer, so I step right in front of the vampire. Standing on the tips of my toes, my hands on his shoulders, I’m able to press my lips against Shuu’s. He kisses back, lightly forces his lips against mine. It’s not a heated one, but surely one formed from passion.

I’m the first to break away from the kiss, allowing the muscles in my toes a rest. I don’t look the vampire in the eyes after breaking away. Instead, I remove my arms from his shoulders and wrap them around his body. I lean into his front, inhaling his scent. It's still foreign to me, but it's comforting. Like him.

“I’m going now,” I say, although my arms remain snaked around him. “I’m going outside for a bit before we go to school.” I feel him tense the moment I utter the words. “I’m telling you that because I know you’d probably get upset if I left and you didn’t know where I was. I promise I’m not trying to leave, I just want to clear my head before going to school. Besides,” I look up at the vampire, meeting his gaze, “I have no reason to leave you.”

My words are like a spell, causing his body to loosen in an instant. He nods his head and I unravel my arms from him. With a smile and a short wave, I head towards the stairs the lead to the door. I exit Shuu’s room and head down the hall to find my own. It doesn’t take me too long to realize I have no idea where I’m going. I’ve only been to his room once, and that time I went there and didn't leave on my accord, so the way back is blank to me.

I groan and walk the seemingly ends halls of the manor, trying to find one that looks familiar. I open a door that leads to a balcony. I take a step into the cold, late evening air. It chills me to the bone and goosebumps dot my arms. There is something about the cold that I love. The way it seems to cool everything, making it fresh. I stare at the setting sun, watching it slowly dip into the horizon. The last rays of the day slowly dying from now.

Another shiver runs through me, telling me I should change and put on my jacket before coming back outside. When I open the door to enter the manor, there’s a figure in the way. I look up to see Reiji staring down at me, eyes hard as always.

“Oh, hello, Reiji, I didn’t know you were here,” I say.

“I need to have a word with you,” he replies, not even giving a greeting of his own. He starts to walk down the hall, so I guess I'm supposed to follow him. The second eldest vampire leads me to his lab-like room. I enter, closing the door behind me. This will be the third time I was in here to talk to the vampire, I hope I didn’t do anything bad again.

He picks a clipboard up from the coffee table and scans over it. Without giving an explanation, has me do random things. He asks me to walk in a straight line, do some reading, and task that seem very familiar in general.

“Rei-” I begin.

“Silence yourself,” he snaps as he scribbles some more thing onto the paper before him. “I swear, I’m always going to be going behind my brothers and their stupid games,” he murmurs under his breath. He sighs as he places the clipboard back down on the coffee table. “You may sit now.” He gestures to the seat in front of him, and I take it.

“We received a letter today,” he begins. “It was a notice saying a doctor from the hospital you were emitted to will be coming here sometime next week. They said that is has been about three months since you've been discharged and two since your last check up, correct?”

“Yes,” I say with a nod.

“Whoever they pick to check up on you will arrive later next week like I previously mentioned. I was asked to do a pre-appoint to make sure things are in check before the actual session.” He hands me the clipboard and pen. “Go over this. Fill in anything I left blank and correct any errors.”

I nod once more and take the survey from his hands. I've done these multiple times before, so I'm used to them. Maybe that's why the task he wanted me to perform were familiar, they were standard things to check. I scan over the document, reading over what was already filled in. Most things Reiji did, such as my name, age and birthday, and I wonder how he knows them. Things such as my last menstruation cycle are left blank of course. I fill out the few things left empty. An answer to a particular question leaves me puzzled.

“Why did you check ‘yes’ for number twenty-seven?” I question.

“Which is that?”

“Patient has taken nonprescription medication/drugs’. Wine isn't considered drugs, its alcohol, which has its own question.”

“Do you really think I'm dumb enough to mistake wine for a drug?” he questions, his words sharp, challenging.

“Uh...no,” I say.

“Shuu didn't inform you about it I presume. That good for nothing always doing everything half-ass. I don't know what happened between the two, but to tell you simply, he drugged you sometime last night.”

“He what?” I gasp, not knowing if I could trust Reiji, the one who I can tell has the most trouble with Shuu.

“He took one of my drugs last morning and said he wanted to have fun. Whatever happens, between the two of you is your business, which I've been told not to intervene in.”

Did Shuu really drug me? What purpose would he have to do so? I don't want to believe Reiji, but it doesn’t seem like a lie. It would give a logical explanation of my vague memories.

I try to shake the thoughts from my head, thinking about it now won't do me any good. I finish going over the survey and hand it back to Reiji. He dismisses me and I gladly take the invitation to leave. I head to my room, my mind overrun with troubling thoughts.

* * *

 

My pencil repeatedly taps at my notebook, beating far faster than the second hand on the clock. I won't let my eyes leave the ticking hand as if my stare alone will make it move quicker. It ticks by at the usual pace, but it seems to be slowing, mocking me even.

I’ve been staring at the clock all of History, wanting the period to be over as soon as humanly possible. I just want to leave this class and go somewhere. But this somewhere can't be the music room. Not only did I feel uneasy with Shuu this earlier, but Reiji came along and made everything a million times worse than it originally was.

I don’t know how to approach Shuu about this. In the past, facing Shuu head on about things give me a result I was satisfied with. But I don’t know if the tactic will work this time. I don’t want to accuse him of something I’m not totally sure about, that would cause a whole new problem. I’m thinking the best thing to do is to let it sit for some time and it will soon be brushed under the rug.

The sounding of the chimes brings me back to reality. I don’t even collect my stuff before I’m out of my seat. Ayato gives me a weird look as I walk by him, but I don't give him a second glance. I head straight over to Haru and Keita.

“Hi, Haru, Keita,” I say once I approach the duo.

Haru is the first to greet me. “Hey, Hikari. What’s up?”

“Nothing really,” I say with a small smile. “Hey, would it be too much to ask if I can have lunch with you two today?”

“No, that would be great,” Keita says, turning towards his friend. He nods his head, agreeing the plan is a good one.

I sigh in relief, thankful I now have a reason to skip over the music room today. I do feel guilt twist in my stomach, but I try not to think of it. I walk back to my desk and collect my stuff. I return to Haru’s desk and the three of us head to the cafeteria. I’ve actually never been there, which is odd, I have been coming to this school for a bit more than two months now.

Haru and Keita head to a certain table as soon as we enter the large area, making me think that it's their usual table. We settle down and take out our food. The two of them take out properly boxed lunches, and I simply take out a container of fruit and a bag of cookies.

“So, Hikari, did you finish your piano lessons?” Keita asks me.

“More or less,” I say with a shrug. “I didn’t master the piece, and I mess up here and there, but I’m almost done.”

“Shouldn’t you keep working on it then?”

“Nah, I can’t go in there with Shuu for the time being. Lucky me, I lost another bet.”

This makes Haru laugh out loud. He chokes on whatever was in his mouth, making him cough furiously. After calming down, he clears his throat. “Excuse me,” he says, the smile never leaving his face. “It’s just, you’re really bad at bets. First with Ayato and now with the other. You really need to stop gambling. Did you lose anything this time?”

“Nothing but a bit of my dignity,” I say sarcastically.

The conversation throughout the period is void of anything weird. We talk casually about grades and life. Well, when it came to personal lives, I let the boys do most of the talking. I make a few comments here and there, keeping up with the others. My thoughts continue to drift to Shuu, wondering what he may be doing at the moment. Is he playing like he was last time I wasn’t there? Could he be waiting for me? Does he even care if I come or not?

“Hikari?” a voice says, snapping me out of my thoughts.

“Hm?” I hum, focusing on the two in front of me.

“I said, how is Yui?” Keita repeats.

“Oh, Yui. She’s good, nothing different with her.”

“That’s good,” he says with a nod.

“Why so curious about my sister?” I tease, wiggling my eyebrows.

The glasses wearing boy’s cheeks color a bit. “No reason, just wondering.”

“Besides, Keita over here is taken,” Haru says.

“Really?” I say. “That sucks, my plans are ruined.”

Keita’s face only reddens, causing both Haru and me to laugh.

“I feel bad for the two of you,” Haru says. “Chained down by the shackles of a relationship. I, on the other hand, can do whatever I want, whenever I want.”

“Who said I was in a relationship?” I ask.

“Aren’t you and Shuu something?”

“Uh, it’s a bit complicated at the moment,” I say, tapping the side of my water bottle.

“Oh, sorry,” Haru says.

The chimes ring again, telling us that we need to head to our next class. I put on a smile before leaving the two, thanking them for letting me join them. We part ways, and I head to Home Ed. I try to focus in class, but Shuu seems to be in my every thought.

* * *

I scribble down the answers to my math homework, trying to finish it before I fall asleep. All I want to do at the moment is drop everything and sleep, but I know I would only regret not finishing my work. I’m already dressed in my plaid purple, pajama pants, and black tank top. My hair is already brushed and in a ponytail.

I notice I need my protractor for the next few problems, so I search for the tool. I search my bag and under my bed. I open the drawers of my nightstand, only to see the back of a frame. Forgetting about my work, I pick up the object of my past.

I hold the framed photo in my hand, staring at the younger me. The she doesn’t look the slightest scared or uncomfortable next to Natsume. She smiles like that is where she belonged and no matter how hard it could be at times, nothing truly bad would ever take place in that household. Her fingers laced with Natsume as if she’s saying, “This is the person I love, the person I want to be with.” How wrong that girl was.

The creaking of the door opening snaps me out of my thought. “I’m coming in,” a voice says, not giving much time to react. I quickly hide the photo under my pillow, like it is a forbidden artifact that shouldn’t be in my possession. The instant I saw my pillow down, the door is fully open, revealing Shuu.

“Wow, thanks for the warning,” I joke with a role of my eyes.

“No problem,” he says with a shrug as he makes his way towards me. He sits on the chair close to my bed. He looks me straight in the eyes, his expression serious. “Hikari, we need to talk.”

“Uh oh, Shuu is getting serious,” I say in a joking manner although I feel anything but happy. HIs words make my stomach turn and palms sweat. I wanted to let this die down, to leave it alone and forget about it.

“I’m not playing,” he says sternly.

“Did I not just say you were serious?”

“Stop fooling around, this isn’t a game!” he snaps, making me stop my smile. He inhales deeply, calming himself for both our sakes. “Why didn’t you come to the music room today?”

“Because I still can’t master the piece and the ghost of music past regret me,” I reply.

The vampire is unamused. “Hikari, I’m serious. You were acting weird earlier and it is bothering me.”

“It's nothing, I swear. There’s no need to worry about me.” I press my lips together and look away from Shuu. I have to fight my hand to stay away from my hair.

“Is it because yesterday?” the vampire questions, causing me to stiffen. “I hit right on the nail, didn’t I? Hey, if I made you upset, I’m sorry. I’m sure that Reiji already told you about the drug. I know that was stupid and I honestly did it for my own amusement. I didn’t know things would escalate like they did. If they went in a way you aren’t comfortable with, I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine,” I murmur under my breath.

“Hikari, I’m serious. If it mad-”

“I said it’s fine!” I snap at the vampire, glaring at him. He is shocked by my outburst and looks at me with a mixture of surprise and confusion. I shake my head at myself and lower it into my hands.

“Sorry,” I say after some silence. “Honestly, I’m fine with it, it wouldn’t have been the first. I have just been having troubling thoughts about what you asked me earlier. You asked if I could see the things about myself that you like. Well, I can’t,” the two words leave my mouth with a bitter taste. I’ve said them repeatedly, and it seem like I will be once more. “I don’t like myself, Shuu, I don’t. I think I’m a burden, problematic, and a nuisance. I’ve little shame and just overall a disgusting person. I do not love myself and I can't find a single thing about me that you would find appealing.”

The hours of therapy never changed my view on myself. I don’t think I’m beneficial in any way. And I constantly come between people and cause problems. I’m my hassle, from my tantrums to my medication. And when I first got here and had sex with both Ayato and Laito. There is nothing about me that’s likable or respectable.

“You have extremely amusing reactions to things,” Shuu says, making me look up at him. His head is back and his eyes are close, but I can tell he is thinking. “You always say when you’re annoyed. You possess a variety of skills in multiple areas. You realize when you make mistakes and you try your best to fix them. Even if it seems nosy at times, you try to help others. You have a nice sense of humor and your dramaticness and sarcasm is fresh and enjoyable. And like I said from the very beginning,” he opens his lovely blue eyes, looking into my pink ones, “you’re very interesting.” He leaves his chair and comes closer to me. “And as a bonus, you’re very attractive.”

I'm left speechless by his words. No one has ever said anything like that to me. Each word spoken was filled with extreme sincerity. His body language made it like he was saying nothing, but his words were everything. He leans in close to me, a small smile present on his lips. He brushes away an unshed tear and moves my hair from my face so it's behind my ear.

“There are many things I like about you, and I want you to be able to see them. You are your greatest critic, so don't judge too hard. Because if you see what I see, you’d be a much happier person, and I’d love that. You have flaws, that’s what makes you human. I, on the other hand, well, am neither perfect nor human.” The comment makes me laugh softly.

Shuu reaches down and takes my hand in his. He rubs circles on it as he says, “Allow me to love someone that loves herself.” He raises my hand towards his face, placing a kiss on it. He looks up at me, our eyes locking once again.

Still unable to speak, I nod my head meekly. He does the same, confirming he understands my acknowledgment. I feel as if I have to say something, but the words seem to want to come out at onces, backfiring on themselves. There’s nothing I can possibly say that would even reflect half the feelings and emotion in my heart at the moment. “Can I have a hug?” is all I’m able to say.

The vampire smiles and chuckles at the childish request. He nods and let’s go of my hand. He leans over so he is able to snake his arms around me and hold me close. This is what I love, feeling someone else’s embrace and warmth. Having them hold onto me and determined to make sure I stay with them.

“Thank you, Shuu,” I whisper into his ear. “Thank you for caring for me, for changing me.”

“I can say the same,” he says into my ear. “Hikari, my biggest regrets in life are not knowing how people around me felt and hurting them. So, please, tell me when something troubles you or you feel uncomfortable, I want to know stuff like that.” His embrace tightens around me. “I can’t lose you, I refuse to.”

“I will, I promise,” I say. He release me from his warm embrace and looks down at me.

“You better not start crying,” he teases.

“Why do you always say that?” I ask with a laugh.

“People crying is annoying,” he says rolling his eyes, but I know he just doesn’t want to see me sad.

“You’re a jerk,” I say with a roll of my eyes.

“Really?”

“Yeah, but you can be my jerk.”

“I can live with that,” he says. He leans in, placing his lips on my own. I kiss back, letting him know how much he means to me. He slides his arm around my waist bringing me closer to him. It is similar to the kiss we shared earlier, but this one is different. It is like a wordless promise between the two of us.

He is the first to break away from the kiss. He looks relaxed, his smile still present on his face. “Do you want me to stay with you today?”

“I would love that,” I reply, happy he suggested it.

“You need anything?”

“Like I would take anything you’d give me,” I say, giving him a playful punch. “I’m not going to be drugged again.”

“And here I thought I would be able to see your looney side again.”

“Doubt it.”

He shrugs his shoulders. “I can hope.” He says he needs to go to his room for a moment and leaves. Once he’s gone, I retrieve the photograph from under the pillow. I stare at the photo like I did not too long ago. I need to tell Shuu. If I’m going to truly move on, I have to let go. I’ve long accepted what happened, I just need to remember that the past should hold me in chains. I but the framed photo back into the drawer until I figure out what I’m going to get rid of it.

I clear the notebooks and school supplies off my bed and return them to my school bag. The moment I zip it close, Shuu is back in my room. He doesn’t say anything about what he did, but I have no reason to ask.

He kills the lights and we both find ourselves under the covers of my bed. I cuddle up into his bare chest, his arm draped over me. His warmth fills my body, making me feel protected and cared for. I inhale deeply, taking in his scent that is becoming more and more comforting.

“Shuu?” I whisper.

“Hm?”

“No funny business.”

“Sure.”

“Shuu.”

“Hm?”

“Are you comfortable?”

“Mm-hmm.”

“Shuu?”

“ _ Hm _ ?”

“I love you.”

“Do you love yourself yet?”

“I'm getting there.”

“Good.”

There is a long pause in the conversation. Right before I fall asleep, I hear, “I love you, too, Hikari.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GOD I LOVE SHUU. I have basically fallen in love with my interpretation of a character fml. Oh well, hope you guys liked it. Comment your thoughts, didn’t get many on my last real chapter. Also, don’t forget to vote or comment if you want a prequel or not. Thank you all for reading, publish soon my lovelies.


	36. Comfort

I roll back and forth across my bed with no clear purpose. I have nothing to do and I’m so bored. I have a few hours until the doctor comes. Reiji told his brothers not to bite be for the time being because of the appointment being so close.  
  
I sit up with a groan. I should go bake a cake or something, anything to occupy my time. I have been with Shuu in my free time for the past week, and I’m beginning to think I’m becoming bothersome. I don't want to annoy him or anything, so I think today will be best spent giving him his space.  
  
I roll off of my bed and onto the floor. I walk to my wardrobe to change out of my pajamas. I don’t know when the doctor will come, so I should get dressed for it now I guess. I learned that it is best to wear flowy clothes such as dresses and skirts during an appointment because it isn't a guarantee that they'll need me to change. I find my black and white skirt and a blue blouse. I go to the bathroom to brush my hair and I gaze at myself in the mirror. I quickly open one of the drawers and take out my white headband. I put it in my hair and look back at my reflection. I actually look...cute. I smile at myself and leave the bathroom to head to the kitchen.  
  
I make it to the kitchen, debating on what to make. I made a cake last time, so that doesn’t seem so fun. I guess cookies are sufficient, I haven’t made any in awhile. I quickly mix the ingredients and put the batch of twenty in the oven. Knowing I have time before taking them out, I leave the kitchen and race back to my room. I find my book, Things We Know by Heart, and head back downstairs.  
  
“Whore-chan,” I hear a voice coos behind me as I make my way down the stairs. “Where are you going?”  
  
“Am I required to answer?” I ask, turning around to give the vampire an icy look.  
  
“Why are you so cold?” Laito says, holding his arms like he’s freezing. He is behind me in an instant, making me flinch from surprise. I turn around, a second from continuing my descent of the stairs. He snakes his arms over my shoulders and down my torso. He leans into my ear and whisper. “How come you know longer want to have fun with me?”  
  
“Laito, stop,” I say, looking away from him. I feel his weight pushing me, knowing he is mostly leaning on me. He moves his hands down my stomach and under my shirt. “Stop!” I shout at him. I turn around to push him off. I lose my footing, stepping off the stair, causing me to fall. I close my eyes and tense my body, preparing for the impact. Instead, I feel two arms catch me. I open my eyes to Laito, a brow raised.  
  
“You rather protect that book than yourself?” he says. I notice that I clench my gift from Shuu tightly to my chest. “Where did you even get that from?”  
  
“It was from Shuu, please put me down,” I say. He does so and I thank him.  
  
“So you're his exclusive whore now or something?”  
  
“No,” I say harshly, giving him a glare. “And about what you said last week, I am not toying with his heart or anything of the sort. I love him, and I don’t know why you feel entitled to know this.”  
  
“Hmmm,” he hums and says under his breath, “I guess I don’t have a chance.” He turns around and continues up the stairs. “Just to see if he really his ready for this, ask him to tell you about Sakura. I believe the outcome will be fun.”  
  
“Sakura?” I question, but the vampire is already gone. I shake my head not, not bothering to think about it. I race to the kitchen, hoping my cookies aren’t overdone. To my relief, they actually still have some time. This leaves me time to think about what Laito said. Why does it seem like he is always infected my mind with bothersome things? He said to ask about Sakura, who is that? Could she be Shuu’s ‘last heartbreak’?” Is she important in some way?  
  
Get a grip, Hikari, Laito is just messing with your head. Stop pondering about it and ask Shuu like he said. But if Laito told me to do something, then I bet little good can come from it. I sigh and try to focus on the task at hand. I remove the cookies from the oven and place them on the cooling tray. I repeat this with the second batch. I stare down at the three dozen cookies I made. Did I make too many? I shrug it off and put them on a dessert display. I leave them on the counter and clean the small mess I made. After I remove my apron, I leave the kitchen.  
  
Trying to figure out who Shuu’s past lover only makes me think of mine. I still have the picture, even though I told myself I have to get rid of it. I go to my room as I try to make a plan in my head. I open the door to my room and go straight to the nightstand. I open it and pick up the frame, look back down at the picture. I remove the photo from the frame and slide it into my skirt pocket. I think I should talk to Yui about this. It will help since I can’t really bring this up with Shuu at the moment. I head to my sister’s room, hopeful she can help.  
  
“Hey, Yui,” I say, knocking on the door to her bedroom. I hear a sound from the other side of the door. I twist the door and open it. “Umm, Yui, I ne-” I stop mid-sentence when I look at my sister. She is turned towards Subaru his arm around her waist. Her hands are on his shoulders her face flushed. All of our jaws seems to drop in unison. By the redness of her face and her breath a bit harder than usual, I make a guess of what I walked in on.  
  
I take a step back slowly. “Never mind, it can wait.” Right before I close the door all the way, I say, “Have fun you two love birds,” and shut the door completely.  
  
I smile as I hear murmuring from the other side of the door. I can’t believe I walked in on that, I wonder how they feel. Trying to contain my laughter at their discomfort, I head down the hall. I think I will just go to the music room for the time being.  
  
I open the door to the music room, wondering if it will help me. I enter the empty room, the calmness of it already soothing me. I walk to the shelf with the music sheets on it. Mines and Shuu’s violins lean against the shelf in their cases. I pick up and open mines, smiling at the wooden instrument. I take it from the case and hold it in my hand. The feel of the instrument gives me a sense of joy.  
  
I place the violin under my chin and raise my bow. I play a slow and calming piece. I give every note it's due and allow my body to relax as I play. The melody sounds throughout the room, echoing back to me. I finish the piece, lowering my bow and instrument. My nerves and mind seemed to have calmed, no longer raging messes.  
  
“Johann Bach’s Partita,” a voice says. I open my eyes to see Shuu leaning against the frame. “No sheet needed and played perfectly,” he praises me.  
  
“Thank you,” I say with a smile. “Care to join me?”  
  
“If you’ll allow it,” he jokes.  
  
“I shall,” I respond, gesturing him to come in. He finds the moment as funny as I do and walks into the room with me.  
  
He stops and studies me up and down. “You look nice today,” he compliments.  
  
“Thanks.” I try not to let my cheeks color too much at the compliment. “You look good every day, though.”  
  
“I’m going to pretend I believe that.”  
  
“I’m serious. You always look nice. Your style of sweaters and collared shirts is very nice.” A roll of his eyes is his only response. “Want to play a duet?” I suggest.  
  
“Sure,” he says.  
  
“You can take over the violin, I’ll take the piano.” He nods. I pass him my instrument so he can put it away as he retrieves his own. I take my place at the piano bench, adjusting the seat from the last time Shuu played.  
  
“Who do you want to play?” the vampire question from the shelf.  
  
“Beethoven.”  
  
“Picking favorites now? I can tell you like his work a lot.”  
  
“Coming from the person whose alarm is Fur Elise.”  
  
“I change it ever so often. If the same thing wakes me up repeatedly, I will grow to hate it.”  
  
I nod my head, understand his logic. He picks today's piece and hand me the sheet. He stands by me and we look at each other. After giving a knowing look, we begin to play. One thing I love more than playing is doing it with another person. There is a joy that comes with sharing the love of music with someone you care for. It is like when our tunes are sync, so are our souls. We have this kind of connection with is created by our music.  
  
We finish the melody and we both let out a sigh. I look up at Shuu, a smile plastered on my face. He smiles softly down at me.  
  
“Have you finished that book yet?” Shuu asks.  
  
“No,” I answer. “It is getting really good, though.”  
  
“It’s the one out the heartbroken stalker girl, right?”  
  
“Yeah,” I say. Heartbroken. The word reminds me of what Laito said earlier. I look back at Shuu. Is it really the best to ask him about it directly? No, that will be bad.  
  
“Shuu?” I question.  
  
“Yeah?” he replies, lowering his violin.  
  
“You said if something every bothers me, I should tell you, right?”  
  
“Yeah, what’s wrong?”  
  
“Well, um, was there someone before me?” I say hesitantly.  
  
“What do you mean by that?”  
  
I being to idly twirl my hair around my finger. “Like, someone you loved,” I explain. I look over at him and he is giving me a questioning look. “It’s just, Laito said something about you having another heartbreak and something about a ‘last time’. I was just wondering about it. If you don’t want to talk about it, it's perfectly understandable.” I know it is a bit unfair to ask him about his own past love when I haven't told him about mine, but I doubt he’s as troubled as I am.  
  
“That idiot, always yapping his mouth,” Shuu says with a shake of his head. He sits down on the sofa and leans his head back, a sign that he’s thinking. “There was a girl that I loved before I met you. Her name was Sakura and she was one of the brides. She was the first person I loved.”  
  
So Sakura was his lover. The way he says it kind of hurts me. I know he is allowed to love someone else, but hearing him speak so sincerely about someone else makes me feel a little jealous. But there is also a hint of sadness in his words.  
  
“She died not too long ago, and it really messed me up. Do you remember that time at school when you were saying you killed someone you loved?”  
  
I nod, feeling my heart sink when I think of Kaname.  
  
“Well, I also carry the guilt ending so someone’s life. I didn’t try and comfort her and understand her wants. She tried to run away, which isn’t even possible here. I was unable to protect her and I ultimately lost her.”  
  
“I’m sorry to hear that,” I say, looking down at the floor. So he knows how a feel, but a hundred time worse. He lost his lover.  
  
“That’s why I’m so protective of you at times,” he continues. “I don’t want to lose someone I care for ever again. It is a pain we share, so you understand how I feel. That day you were saying how you wanted to leave, it just reminded me too much of what Sakura said. I didn’t want the past to repeat itself, so I acted in a way I thought would change the situation.”  
  
So that’s why Shuu acts the way he does. He never talks about things like this, so the information is beneficial. He doesn’t want to relive his fears, so he tries to prevent them, which may cause him to express more emotion than usual.  
  
“I have long forgiven you for that day in the game room,” I finally say. “Even if you want to hide them, emotions seem to surface, especially when triggered by a memory.”  
  
I walk over to Shuu and accompany him on the couch. I lean my head on his shoulder, assuring him I’m here for him. “We’ve had both loved and lost,” I say the words and the picture in my pocket seems to become heavier. “But the experiences change us, and we have to move on.”  
  
He moves his arms around me, holding me closer. “True,” he says. We stay like that for some time, silently comforting each other.  
  
“I’m going out soon,” Shuu says, finally filling the void of silence.  
  
“Can I go?” I ask, excited at the thought of going on another outing.  
  
“Not this time, you have you check up thing soon.”  
  
“That sucks, I wanna go,” I whine. I sprawl out onto his lap my hand on my forehead. “Why must you abandon me in my most dire time,” I say dramatically. “Leaving me to go have fun with Izayoi and Yuzuki.”  
  
“Stop acting like that,” he says with a smile grin.  
  
“I thought you liked my dramaticness.”  
  
“I do.”  
  
“Good, because you’re going to get a lot of it.” I get off his lap to stretch. “Don’t have too much fun without me, you big doofus.”  
  
“I wanted to bring you this time, but by the time you finish whatever, they’d be closed. I really want you to meet Yuzuki, you two will get together nicely.” He stands up and stretches also. “Go get your jacket,” he says.  
  
“So you are taking me?” I say with a smile.  
  
“You wish,” he counters with a smug smile and I pout in response. “We are going somewhere on the property, I think it should be satisfying for now.”  
  
Skeptical yet curious, I nod and leave to fetch my jacket from my room. When I arrive at my bedroom, I grab my gray coat and put on a pair of leggings to defend my legs from the cold air. I head back down the stairs and see Shuu by the front door.  
  
He opens the door allowing the cold air of the night hit my body. I shiver runs through me, but a smile is present on my face. I just love the cold feeling of late fall. I follow Shuu down the stays and onto one of the many marble walkways. The moon and stars illuminate the sky, shining down on the two of us.  
  
“Where are we going?” I question the vampire as I walk beside him.  
  
“Somewhere,” he says simply.  
  
“Why do you never give me a legit answer?” I whine, swaying my body like I’m going to fall.  
  
“It is legit.”  
  
“Ugh,” I let out an irritated groan although my smile only grows. “If you don’t tell me, I’m not going.”  
  
“Why are you acting like this?” he question, although I can see he is slightly amused by me.  
  
“If you’re going to be complicated, so am I,” I say. I stop walking and sit down on the walkways. The thin layer of the leggings does little to prevent the icy cold touch of the marble from freezing my butt and thighs. I try not to reveal my discomfort.  
  
“Why do you want to ruin the surprise?” Shuu questions. “I’m trying to be nice and spend some time with you before I leave.”  
  
I guess I am being a bit rude. He wants to be with me a bit longer before he leaves. Besides, his surprises are usually very nice. I nod and get off the ground. I rub my butt, trying to unfreeze my nerves. “Let’s go then.”  
  
We continue to follow the walkway until it makes a turn away from the wooded area. Instead of staying on the path, Shuu continues forward, into the trees. I follow close behind him, not wanting to be separated. I push branches to the side as I walk, wondering where he’s taking me.  
  
After what feels like forever, we come into a clearing. I gasp in awe at the view. It is like a small, yet beautiful meadow. There are flowers growing; spotted all over the clearing. The moonlight seems to make the petals glow, like shining silk.  
  
“It's a shame you missed firefly season,” Shuu says. “It looks even better in the spring. There are far more flowers and you may even see a rabbit or two.”  
  
“It’s beautiful, though,” I say. “How did you find this place? I don’t see you as the person to just wander around the property in your free time.”  
  
“I was much different when I was younger,” Shuu says. He begins to walk into the clearing and I trail behind him. He sits down on the ground and reclines, facing the sky. I do the same, staring up into the night sky. The stars shine down on us, twinkling in beauty.  
  
“Tell me about when you were younger,” I say to Shuu.  
  
“Hmm, I don’t know. After you were being childish and everything, I don’t think you deserve a back story,” he says and I don’t have to look at him to know he is wearing his teasing smile.  
  
“Please.”  
  
“You tell me some of yours first.”  
  
“I don’t know whether or not you will tell yours, so I’m not.”  
  
There is a pause, then Shuu says, “I’m using one of my ‘do anything’ passes. Now, tell me.”  
  
I roll my eyes at him, although I smile at his decision. “I born in June, a summer baby. I don’t remember my biological father or mother. All I know is that Yui and I share our biological father. We were then adopted by Seiji, who we call Father. I don’t like him anymore, though. Yui and I grew up around the Church, it being like a home to us. Of course, we didn’t live there or anything, but Father was the head priest at the time, so we were there a lot. Yui and I were always close. Other kids messed with Yui because she was very timid and didn’t much like Father; none of the kids knew we were adopted. I defended Yui, not liking other people messing with her. I was her big sister, it was my responsibility. I had anger issues.”  
  
“Had?” Shuu questions.  
  
“Okay, I still have them. Yui and I were happy with our lives. Then one day, I was taken away from her and Father. It was for my protection or whatever.” I take in a breath, I guess now is a good time to talk to him about living with the Keis. I haven’t told him yet, but I think it's time, especially after he informed me about Sakura. “I lived with these brothers, Kaname and Natsume Kei. I stayed there for three and a half years. I was fine there at first, but then one of the brothers, Kaname, died. It really messed up Natsume. After that, well….I didn’t best eighteen months of my life. It landed me in the hospital for a few months. But I survived and that counts for something.”  
  
“I guess it does,” Shuu says. “Like I told you before, I was pressured to be the best I could be. I was a fairly happy child, to be honest. Even with the constant pressure, I enjoyed things to the fullest. I left to see my friends when I was upset and even had a dog for some time. Shigure, the dog, was the one the lead me to this area. I used to play with him here a lot when I was supposed to be doing my lessons. With Izayoi, Yuzuki, and Edgar, another of my friends, I didn’t care about my responsibilities and I lived carefree. Things changed after I caused pain to all of them. I told myself that being with them wasn’t good for any of us, so I tried to close myself off for some time.” He lets out a short, forced laugh. “It didn’t last long. I saw Izayoi or Yuzuki every time I went to get new music. I couldn’t live without them, in a way.”  
  
“What about Edgar?” I question.  
  
“He moved on,” Shuu says grimly  
  
“I see,” I say. I get up and walk around the area. Shuu props himself up on his elbows to watch me. I begin picking flowers, collecting the beautiful plants. Once I have a fair amount, I return to Shuu. “These are nice flowers,” I say.  
  
“They are,” Shuu says, looking at me with a bit of confusion.  
  
“Mums and pansies, I believe,” I say. “They bloom this time of the year. I guess they like the cold season like me.” I begin to twist their stems together and Shuu watches with curiosity. I hum a song as I perform my task.  
  
“What are you doing?” the vampire questions.  
  
“Something,” I reply with a smile. How do you like vague answers now, Shuu?  
  
“What are you humming, then?”  
  
“A song.”  
  
“May you sing it?”  
  
The request takes me by surprise, but I comply and sing my song to him. “You're alone, you're on your own, so what? Have you gone blind? Have you forgotten what you have and what is yours? Glass half empty, glass half full. Well either way you won't be going thirsty. Count your blessings not your flaws.” I sway slightly as I sing the song to the vampire. I look at him and my words seem to relax him. “There's method in my madness. There's no logic in your sadness. You don't gain a single thing from misery. Take it from me,” I sing softly into the night sky. I believe the song is beautiful and it reminds me of Shuu in a way. I continue to work the flowers together. I take my time, careful not to snap any of the thin stems. I smile when I complete the project. “You can reclaim your crown, you're in control.” I place the flower crown on Shuu’s head, smiling at my lover. “Rid of the monsters inside your head. Put all your faults to bed.” I kiss him lightly on his forehead. “You can be king again.”  
  
He sighs and closes his eyes. I sit with my legs to the side and prompt his head on my lap. I stroke his head softly, letting my fingers intertwine with his sea of silky, orange hair. I begin to decorate his locks with my remaining flowers.  
  
It seems as if you relationship is filled silent moments like this, but I don't mind them too much. They're peaceful and calming, yet comforting.  
  
After some time, I let out a sneeze, causing Shuu to open his eyes. “I think that's a sign that it's time to go inside,” he says, rising from my lap. He pats his head with a questioning look. “Am I a garden person or something?”  
  
I giggle at his comment. “Sure, the king of the garden.”  
  
He raise a brow and picks a white flower from his collection. He tucks it behind my ear with a soft smile. “Then you can be my queen.”  
  
I smile at him as he takes my hand in his. He leads me away from the secret meadow and back to the manor. My smile remains on my face for the whole trip, his hand still gripping mine’s. He walks me to my room and I feel a bit upset.  
  
“I will see you later then?” I say, looking up at Shuu.  
  
“Yeah,” he says, slowly letting go of my hand. We say our farewells and he leaves. I enter my room and collapse on my bed, letting out a sigh. Living here isn't as bad as I originally thought. Being with Yui and Shuu is wonderful.  
  
I stay in my room for about an hour doing work before Reiji comes. He says that the doctor is here. I feel uneasiness in my gut, a bit nervous guess. I nod and follow him to the greeting area.  
  
“Wait here until I get you,” Reiji says, gesturing to the seat. I nod and take the seat. He gives me a stern glance before heading to the meeting room. I sigh, hoping it doesn’t take long for the two to talk. I’ve had my fair share of waiting for appointments, but I just hope I’m not here for the next two years. I don’t know whether this is going to be like ones I usually go through, or different because it's been a while?  
  
I look around the welcoming area, thinking about my first time here. Shuu was laying in this exact seat when I first saw him. I remember that short stare down we had when we first saw each other. I wonder what he was thinking about at the time. I hope he gets back soon, I want to talk to him once the session is over.  
  
After about ten or fifteen minutes, I hear footsteps coming my way. I sit up as Reiji comes by. “You may go now,” he says.  
  
I nod, getting out of the chair. We walk toward the door and he lectures me to behave like I’m a foolish child. We stop at the door and he looks me in the eyes. “Don’t give me a reason to have to go in there.”  
  
I nod and in an instant, he’s gone. I inhale deeply as I take the knob in my hand. I hope it is Dr.Midori, that will make everything much more enjoyable. I open the door stepping into the room. I get a glance of the person, before, turning to close the door.  
  
“Hello,” I say, facing the doctor. Our eyes meet and I instantly freeze. My nervousness turn to fear and my heart begin to thud loudly in my chest. The air in my lungs escape and I find it impossible to breathe. My palms sweat and I feel as if I want to die like I’m going to die.  
  
This can’t be real.  
  
His brown-orange hair I used to play with has grown much longer, passing his shoulder. He has gotten taller and a bit older. But the same cold, blue eyes stare down at me. The sadistic smile that has haunted my nightmares playing on his lips.  
  
“It’s been too long, Hikari,” Natsume says.

 


	37. Natsume

“It’s been too long,” Natsume says, his words chilling me to the bone.

 

I want to shout, to call out to Reiji, but I’m incapable of breathing steadily. How did he get here, why didn’t anyone say anything to him? He isn’t supposed to be here, I’m not supposed to see him again. They all told me he was gone, that he wasn’t coming back. That he was out of my life and he can no longer hurt me. Those unkeepable promises shatter like glass. 

 

I feel the foundation of ‘his not coming back’ break, making the new structure of my life crumble away.

 

“You haven’t seen me in months, and you’re not even going to greet me properly? How despicable,” he spits, eyes hardening on me.

 

“H-H-Hello, Ma-aster,” I stutter, my hands shaking uncontrollably. It's like the months between our separation were mere seconds. I’m no longer a free person, but a defenseless girl that can only obey the one in front of her.

 

“That’s much better,” he says with a smirk. “Come sit over here you little bitch.” 

 

The muscles in my neck allow me to nod, but I quickly fix the mistake I’ve made dozens of times. “Y-Y-Yes, Master,” I reply, looking down at the floor. I can’t look him in the eye, I must address him as he tells me to, I must answer verbally, the rules run in my head as if they were always there. My legs slowly move me to the chair across from him.

 

I don’t look up at him, instead I clench my hands together and keep them in my lap.

 

“You’ve cut your hair,” he says in a tone that sounds like disappointment. “What a shame, I really like it when it was longer.”

 

_ Because you enjoyed yanking it around _ . I don’t reply to the comment. For once, I wish for Ayato or Laito to interrupt what I’m doing, it will give me an opportunity to leave and inform them that the man is surely no doctor and shouldn’t be in here.

 

“Do you nothing to say to me?” he says like we are old friends reuniting for the first time. 

 

I don’t want to speak, but I’m fearful of the consequence if I remain silent and ignore his question. “Y-You grew o-o-out your own ha-air, Master,” I report, my eye remain glued to the floor.

 

“I have,” he says solemnly. “So how has it been living here with a house that has six brothers? How many have them have you done it with you disgusting slut?”

 

I bite my lip, remaining silent.

 

“So now you're not going to answer me? How disrespectful. It seems as if you’ve forgotten everything I’ve taught you. How sad, it took you so damn long to learn the simplest of things. You have always been such a pain in the ass. Making everyone’s life a million times more difficult.”

 

“I’m s-s-sorry, Master,” I say, his words feeling me with dread.

 

“Well that doesn’t quite fix anything, now does it? God, you fuck everything up and can never fix it. Pest like you will always be the same.”

 

I bite my lip even harder, almost daring blood. I rather be any where doing anything other than to be here with him. I don’t want to fall this low again, controlled by someone that should no longer me in my life. I can’t let him waltz in and turn me back to the person I once was. “I-I’ve cha-anged,” I declare softly.

 

“Is that so?” he says like it was a joke. He lets out the chuckle I once fell in love with, but now the sound symbolizes terror. “I don’t think trash like you is capable of change. You’re nothing but a problematic bitch that fucks everyone and their lives. You deserve nothing from the world you only take from.”

 

I try to block out the words, telling myself that they aren’t true. I’m no longer who I used to be. Shuu told me that I’m not those things, that I’m worthy of care and love. “Th-that’s not true.”

 

“So you’re talking back now,” he says, voice cold and threatening. “I swear, I wish I would have gotten rid of you when I had the chance.”

 

_ Why do you get to decide whether I live or die? _

 

“I wonder why Father ever decide to shelter scum like you.”

 

_ He was trying to be a good man. _

 

“It seems like you’ve forgotten what you’ve done, that you’re not only the reason people have gone through pain but was the cause of my brother’s death!"

 

_ I never meant for that to happen. _

 

“And to think I actually cared about you. I stupid I was.”

 

_ I used to love you too. So why can’t you remember the days when we were happy? Neither one of us knew anything would happen that night, so why can’t we accept it.  _

 

“Like anyone could love a pathetic creature like you. The bastard that sees something in you is a blind idiot who needs a damn eye opener.”

 

Something inside me seems to change when he says the words. He may not know it, but the person he speaks about is Shuu. I feel the fear turn to rage. How dare he says that about Shuu? “You can’t say that,” I say, my stutter seemingly vanishing. I look up at the man I have feared for so long. “Shuu is a kind, loving person, a far man better than you. And about Kaname, I never meant any of that to happen. Why can’t you see that? I loved him also!” I yell at Natsume for the first time in years. 

 

My words are met with a sharp pain in my face. His strike is harder than I remember and I stumble to the floor. I hold my cheek where the nerves are flaring, hissing at the pain. I look up at Natsume, his expression still calm, but eye narrowed in anger at me. 

 

“You seem to always forget where your place is,” he snaps. He moves away from the chair, face void of any expression. He comes towards me and I try to get up and move before he comes even closer. By the time I’m on my feet, I feel him pull at my shirt. I’m about to yell, but a hand is placed over my mouth. 

 

“Don’t you make a fucking peep,” he hisses into my ear. “If I end up leaving before I accomplish my goal, I will only come back. Maybe I may even tire of you and go after your sister instead. Yui I believe her name is. Yes, the blonde one may just safice.” The threat causes me to stiffen instantly. I would never forgive myself if Yui got dragged into my own problems.

 

My prior tormenter snakes his fingers in my hair, a gesture Shuu does, but it doesn’t feel similar in the slightest. He clenches a handful of my hair, pulling at it hard. I let out a whine, falling back down onto the floor.

 

“I don’t know why you try to defy me,” he says. “Did you not tell me that you wanted me in your pathetic life?”

 

I bite my lip, trying to force his hold to ease. This only makes him grab it harder, yanking it in every direction.

 

“Answer me you good for nothing whore.”

 

“I did,” I cry out. “But-”

 

“But what?” he challenges, pulling me up so we are facing each other.

 

“But things have changed,” I say.

 

“You keep saying that, but I bet you're still the same despicable pile of shit that you were months ago,” he says, throwing me to the ground. My head throbs painfully and I taste blood in my mouth. The man kicks me in the stomach, forcing the air out of me. I groan in pain, clenching my gut. His foot then strikes my head, making my ears ring. My already pounding head seems to be on the brink of exploding. The pain travels throughout my body, making me want to pass out. 

 

I look up at Natsume, trying to get my eyes to focus. For some time, I only hear ringing and my vision is blurred. My vision is hazy and I begin to see double men in front of me instead of the one tormenter. I then notice that there is no way there are two Natsumes because they look far too different. One’s hair is shorter and isn’t in the same clothing. 

 

This one also lands a punch across the other’s face. It comes towards me. making me flinch. He grabs either side of me, shaking me slightly. Through my unfocused vision, I see his lips moving, but the ringing continues. Sapphire blue eyes stare wide at me. My ears soon pop and sound slowly come back.

 

“Hikari!?” the voice says, shaking me once again. This voice doesn’t belong to Natsume, but Shuu. My vision begins to clear and I see the vampire much more clearly. “Hikari, answer me!” he seems to plea.

 

“Shuu…” I say, trying to focus on him.

 

“Thank goodness,” he says with a sigh.

 

“Well, here he is, Shuu Sakamaki,” Natsume calls from the other side of the room. I see him wipe the blood from his cut lip, no doubt caused by the vampire’s punch. “It’s like a reunion.”

 

“What the hell are you doing here, Natsume!?” Shuu shouts, standing up. I look at Shuu and then back at Natsume, do they know each other?

 

“I just wanted to come by for a visit,” Natsume says. “Why wouldn’t I want to see the two people that completely fucked over my life.”

 

“How the fuck did you get here?” Shuu growls to the other. 

 

“It was honestly quite simple. I was in town the other day when I ran into some old friends. They happily told me that Hikari was staying with the Sakamakis. It didn't take much from there to contact the Church and screw up some scheduling.”

 

“Are you really that pathetic in life that you spend your free time trying to find a girl you've done nothing but torment?” Shuu says, sending the other a glare that could kill. 

 

“I could care less about that atrocious being although I feel as if she needs to be punished,” he says giving me a disgusted look. “I mainly came to see you again, Shuu.”

 

“You know him, Shuu?” I question the vampire, trying to wrap my head around the situation. 

 

“Not now, Hikari,” Shuu replies. 

 

“So the bitch doesn't remember, very surprising. So you never told her,” Natsume says slyly. “A secretive one you are.”

 

“That night has nothing to do with now,” the vampire grumbles to the other. 

 

“But that is the reason I'm here,” the other says. “I want to know why you felt entitled to interfere with my life. Not only did you screw it up before I even met you, but you continued to do so even when it wasn’t related to you in any way.”

 

“So you pissed that I helped someone that need saving? You sound more like a despicable one.”

 

“So that’s how it is, trying to redeem yourself and play hero after you failed with Sakura.”

 

The mention of her girl brings a whole new level of anger to Shuu. His fists clench even tighter and jaw does also.  “What do you know about her?”

 

“Plenty,” Natsume says with a shrug. “I knew her much longer than you did for one thing. I even fancied her after Nanami was no longer an option. But one day, puff, she vanishes without an explanation. Three months later, you show up and Hikari also leaves me. After that, I did some research and found out that Sakura wounded up here also. Most girls that come here are never heard from again. I don’t know what happens here, but if Hikari's faith is going to be the same as Sakura, is it any different from her staying with me?”

 

Everything is so confusing at the moment. What does he mean after Shuu showed up? When and how did these two meet? How the hell does he even know who Sakura is?

 

“Shut the fuck up!” Shuu shouts. “I know you did nothing but hurt Hikari, which she did not deserve!”

 

“I had the right to decide what happened to her in my care. You had no right to come into my life and try to control it. She had nothing to do with you, so you should have just left her the hell alone. Maybe that’s why you two seem to attract to each other. You both have the urge to fuck everything over. Have you ever heard the saying an eye for an eye? While she took my brother's life and I was unable to take hers. So I made her life hell, exactly where she would have been regardless if I killed her or not. That thing you are trying to protect is nothing but a shitty little slut, I hope you know that. She is a burden, lacks common sense, and is an overall repolsiv-”

 

Natsume is unable to finish his sentence because Shuu shoves him against the wall. The vampire gives a monstrous glare, baring his fangs. He holds Natsume against the wall by his neck, the intruder trying his best to claw the hands away from his neck. 

 

“Do let another word leave that shitty pie hole of yours,” Shuu says, trying his hand around Natsume’s neck, almost enough to crush his windpipe. “I will not allow you to say such things about Hikari!” He moves his neck from Natsume’s neck and to her shirt. He throws the other onto the floor with a loud thud. Shuu then tops to the injured man, mercilessly punching him.

 

I stare wide eyes at the sight before me. The punches hit Natsume one after another. I hear his groans of pain and his arms try to block the relentless attacks to no avail. Shuu’s expression is, for a lack of better words, the definition of rage and hatred. His once calm blue eyes have a fire in them I’ve never seen so instantly.

 

I look back at Natsume. He is finally being given a small taste of the pain I went through. He has the slightest understanding of what it feels like it be on the receiving end of the torment. He will know how it feels to be powerless and at someone else’s mercy.

 

So why doesn’t it feel just?

 

The sight in front of me actually sickens me. Not only does seeing Natsume like this completely baffling, but Shuu’s intense rage is frightening. This isn’t how thing are supposed to be handled, even if they were like this in the past.

 

“Stop it...Shuu,” I murmur meekly. “This isn’t right.” I stand up and walk over to the two men. “Shuu, stop!” I shout to the vampire.

 

My command seems to reach the Shuu. He looks over his shoulder at me. His eyes are narrowed. “What are you saying?” he says in confusion.

 

“This, this isn’t right,” I say with a shake of my head.

 

“What has this thing done that's right?” snaps at me.

 

“What you are doing isn’t any better,” I counter. “I know he has done horrible things, I’ve experienced them. But going about it in this way isn’t any good.”

 

“Hik-”

 

“Shuu,” I cut him off. “I know you’re trying to help, thank you for that, but may I have a moment with him. I don’t know you guys’ relationship, but I need to tell him something.” He doesn’t drop his confused look. He seems to be questioning my sanity, but I know what has to be said and done. “Shuu, please, I need this.”

 

Shuu looks away from me and at the beaten man under him. The vampire gets off and takes the man by the collar and drags him over to the chairs. As if he was a rag doll, the vampire throws the other in a chair with his inhuman strength. He leans in close to the Natsume, eyes cold. “Sit here, if you make a move, I swear I will fucking kill you.”

 

Shuu then gives me his attention. “Make it quick, I want this bastard out of my sight.” Shuu remains next to Natsume, probably to make sure the human doesn’t try anything.

 

I walk over to Natsume. His face is bloody and swollen. He stares hard at me but remains silent.

 

“Natsume,” I say, my voice as strong as I can make it. “For two years and one month, I lived with you and Kaname. Even though it was very different from how I lived before and was a bit hard to get used to, I enjoyed it. It was fun living with the two of you. Things were new and I learned many different and beneficial things. Natsume, I loved you,” I say, feeling my heart arch a bit at the words. I see Shuu’s frown deepened, but he move or speak. “Even though it was a strange relationship from the very beginning, I felt the love in whatever it was, and I’m sure you did, too. You were my world, my savior. The time we spent happily together is forever etched into my heart and mind. But the night Kaname died, you changed. I do feel partly responsible for the death of your brother. I did love him very, very much, it was like he was my own brother. My life did become a living hell after that, though.” I press my lips together, trying to hold back my tears. I don’t want to cry in front of him again. “I know you were in pain, but what happen, it just wasn’t right and we both know that. Even after I was taken from you, I couldn’t stop thinking of you. Reminders of you were everywhere, my dreams, my hobbies, my body. Everyone told me that you weren’t good for me, but I couldn’t easily let go of someone that effected be in both a good and bad way. But the thing is, that I have changed. I don’t know what you’re doing with your life, but whatever it is, it shouldn’t cause you to cross paths with me again.”

 

I reach into my skirt pocket and take out the folded picture I was planning on getting rid of today. I stare at the picture, the one thing that linked me to Natsume for so long. The single possession that constantly reminded me of my past and the events of it. I’m parting with Natsume, with the events that shackled, because I never truly free when he still came into my mind. I place the photograph on his lap and look him in the eyes. His are void of emotion and my own are glassy, tears threatening to escape. “Natsume, I no longer love you nor do I want you in my life.”

 

Saying what I have I wanted to say for so long, I walk towards the door. I turn around one last time. I was never given the opportunity to say this, so I will do it now. “Goodbye for good, Natsume.”

 

With my final words spoken I leave the room along with Natsume.

 

__________

 

Shuu’s POV 

 

I watch Hikari leave the room, and I can tell she is on the brink of crying. I look down at the bloody man next to me. I want to continue my assault on this man, take break every bone in his body, to bring him to the point of no return. To cripple him and make it so he could never harm another person. I want to disform him so badly he can never smile his smug smile again.

 

But I hold myself back. it isn’t worth it. If Hikari told me not to, I can’t. I glare down at him once more. 

 

“There is so much I want to say and do to you at the moment,” I snap at the disgusting excuse for a human. “But you aren’t worth either my time or effort. But there is one of the thing you're going to tell me.” I narrow my eyes at the pathetic human. “How the hell do you know Sakura?”

 

Not looking at me, Natsume says, “She was one of Kaname’s friends. They met online and then in person. I then met each other dates for some time.”

 

The confession does nothing to make me feel better. Knowing a beautiful and pure girl associated with a thing like him sickens me.

 

“She's dead, isn't she?” he questions and I hear a bit of sadness in his tone. I look down at him with a confused expression. 

 

“I have no reason to give you any sort of closure,” I say. 

 

“I guess not. I can tell by your reaction that she's gone, though.” He sigh, letting his body relax. “It's like everyone close to leaves me in some way.”

 

“I don't even pity you at this point,” I say. “Having people taken from you is painful, but you had someone to support you after your brother. Instead of coping with Hikari and helping each other through it, you made her the target of your anger. You just pinned all the blame on her because you couldn't escape that things just happened. You don't know how badly  _ you _ messed up  _ her _ life.  _ She _ has nightmares of  _ you _ that kept her from sleeping.  _ She _ is the one taking piles to help her body function properly because  _ you _ messed it up.  _ She _ has panic attacks that make her think that every is  _ you _ and is trying to hurt her.  _ She _ is the one scarred physically, mentally, and emotionally, because of  _ you _ .”

 

“I doubt you know how it feels t-”

 

“I do!” I shout at him, my fist clenching even harder. It takes all my strength not to continue punching him. “Let me tell you something. I also like Sakura, hell, I'm slept with her, and she dead right in front of me. Because of me!” Natsume’s beaten face taken on a slight angered and confused expression. “But I didn't spend my time trying to kill my brother because of what he did. Instead I moved on.”

 

“But how can you just act as if she was nothing?”

 

“I don't, because she was something. I will never forget her nor the good time we spent together. But you can't let yourself cling to the past forever. You're irrational hate for Hikari is stupid. She might have ruined you're life but she saved mine.”

 

He gives me a glare and looks away. 

 

“People change, Natsume. It doesn't seem like you have, but Hikari did. And I don't need you to try and knock her back down to who she used to be. Just know that if I see that disgusting face of yours again, I won't hesitant to end your pathetic life. And if you so much as utter Hikari’s name, tan I will personally put you through hell.”

 

“Reiji!” I shout my brother’s name. The desire to kill my brother is at an all time high, but I can’t waste my time with either of these bastards. “Reiji, get your ass over here.”

 

“I’m not a familiar, I don’t come when called like an animal,” I hear his voice say from behind me.

 

I look over at him cold eyes. “Get rid of this faggot, I don’t want it near me,” I command, grabbing a fist full of his shirt and throwing him to the ground. “I’m sure you already heard everything.”

 

Reiji gives me a nod, not daring to say a word when I’m in this state. I leave the room, not wanting to be in there any longer. My first thought is to go straight to Hikari. After everything that went down, she needs someone. But does she really need me? I don’t know whether she’s angered with me or anything like that. She is probably confused about Natsume and me also. I look down at myself. My hands and shirt have traces of the man’s blood. I wrinkle my nose in disgust. Normally, blood is nothing I would frown upon, but know it's his makes me want to puke.

 

I quickly head to my room. I peel off the shirt and throw it onto the floor. I head to the bathroom to clean the drying liquid from my hands. The cold water turns a faded red when it mixes with the blood. 

 

I look down at my hand and clench it. Never have I felt such rage towards someone before. I have hated Reiji all my life but never have I gone as far as physically fighting him. He harmed two of the most important people in my life, killing one of them, but this rage is different. It wasn’t mixed with sadness like before, but pure, unadulterated hate. It was like I blacked out when he started saying despicable things about Hikari. Would I have actually killed him if Hikari didn’t stop me? I wasn’t even using half my strength, if I was, I could have easily dented his skull. I probably would without a second thought or regret. 

 

No, no! Listen to yourself, Shuu. You are sounding like a soulless monster. I remember the look on Hikari’s face when she stopped me. She looked traumatized when I first went into the room, but she look she gave me then was different. Like she was scared of me.

 

I turn off the still running water and head back into my room. I put on a clean shirt travel to Hikari’s room. I actually walk there, using the time to clear my head. I don’t want to be bottling up any kind of negative emotion near Hikari, she has been through enough torment already.

 

I reached her room and knock on the door. There is no answer from the other side. “Hikari?” I question, calling out to the girl I so desperately need to talk to. “Hikari, I know you’re scared and shaken up, but we need to talk.” I want to do more than talk. I want to hold her in my arms and tell her that the situation is taken care of. I want to give her my protection, assuring her that I’m here and I’m not going to mess up this time. I want to give her all the support I know she needs.

 

There still no answer. I become a bit worried. I knock one more time and state that I’m coming in. I open the door to see an empty room. I feel panic course through my body. Where is she, what is she doing, is she okay? The rapid fire questions take over my thoughts, not allowing me to think straight.

 

“Hey, Shuu,” a voice says. I turn to see my youngest brother Subaru coming my way. “Ya lookin’ for Hikari?”

 

“You know where she is?” I question as calmly as I can.

 

“Yeah, she’s with Yui. Hey, what the hell is going on? I heard yelling and it smelt blood.”

 

“Not right now, Subaru,” I say trying to pass my brother.

 

“No, we aren’t starting this shit again,” Subaru say aggressively. “Don’t say ‘it’s nothing important’ like you always do. She wouldn’t look like she was about to cry a river if it was fucking nothing.”

 

“Subaru, I’m not screwing around. I promise I will tell you later, but now is not the fuckin time!”

 

He gives me a hard stare and says, “I’m going to kick your ass if you don’t tell me later.” He slides his hands into his pockets and head down the hall. I quickly get to Yui’s room, not wanting to be apart from Hikari for another second.

 

I knock on the door like I did with Hikari's. “Yui?” I call out.

 

“Come in,” I hear her soft voice reply. I open the door, relieved by the answer. I see Yui sitting on her bed with her legs tucked under her. On her lap is a sleeping Hikari. Her face is in an uneasy state and she has a few tears staining her cheeks.

 

“Shuu, what happened?” the blonde questions with a concerned look. 

 

“What did she say?” I ask, ignoring her question. 

 

“She just came in through the door, I believe she was running here. She was shaking and murmuring stuff. I told her to come sit with me and I just held her. She ended up falling asleep.”

 

I nod my head. I walk over to the two and pick up the older one. I hold her tightly, letting her head rest against my shoulder. 

 

“Shuu, I don't understand, what's going on?” Yui ask. 

 

“I will explain later,” I say, walking out the room without looking back. I carry the sleeping girl to her room. 

 

Once I enter the room, I lay her on the bed. I look down at her uneasy face, wishing it didn't look too unhappy. I gently shake the girl, trying to wake her. I don’t know whether it is selfish or not, but I can not just leave things like this until she wakes up. Her eyelids soon open, revealing tired pink eyes. She sits up with a groan and scratches her head. He looks at me for a long second and then around the room, her movements sluggish.

 

“Was it a nightmare?”  she asks in groggy voice She winces is sudden and has a hurt expression. She lifts her shirt to see a forming bruise on her abdomen The sign of inflicted pain test my ability to remain calm.

 

“I guess it wasn’t”, she deadpans. She stares off into the distance for some time, the room remaining silent. Then, as if trying to find the correct words, she says, “What...even happened?”

 

“Shit,” I say. “Are you hurt anywhere else besides your stomach?” I question her, concerned for her physical well-being at the moment.

 

“My head is pounding and I feel like I need to puke,” she says, sliding off of the bed. She is uneasy on her own feet and look as if she is going to fall. I aid her as she travels to the bathroom. I stare at her and her blank expression. My expectation of her reaction wasn’t very clear, but this certainly wasn’t it. She isn’t exactly calm, more like she can’t quite process the events. She quickens her pace to the toilet and falls onto her knees before it. She hurls the little in her stomach out,  her body jerking violently. I try my best to do what I can and rub her back. I have no idea how I’m supposed to react to this situation. 

 

When she’s done, she lays the side of her face on the seat. She doesn’t seem the slightest bit fazed that she is resting on a high unsanitary surface. She still has the blank express, vomit smeared on the side of her mouth.

 

“Hikari, how do you feel?” I ask.

 

“Like shit,” she answers. “I don’t know what just happened and,” he voice cracks and I see tears swell in her eyes, “I’m scared. I’m scared and shocked and in pain and, and, and…” she doesn’t finish her sentence. She lets the tears silently run down her face. “Shuu,” she croaks, “can you hold me?’

 

I nod, wanting nothing more to do that. I take the emotionally and mentally abused girl in my arms. She grips my shirt tightly, hand shaking as the clench around the fabric. She quietly sobs into my shirt.

 

“It’s fine, Hikari,” I say.

 

“It isn’t!” she sobs. “They always said it was fine, that everything will be okay. That Natsume wasn’t going to come back, that I no longer had to worry about him. That everything would be peachy, but it's not! This is not good, this is not ‘okay’, this is...is...”

 

I can only imagine how she feels. This man was both her happiest and terror. She was probably promised a million times that he was forever gone. She needed to be assured that to be able to move on, so for it to be a nothing but an empty promise can only make her feel crushed. 

 

“I know what happened was pretty scary,” I say, knowing that it is a drastic understatement. “Having him come back shocked the both of us, and I’m sorry you had to go through that. But please believe me when I say that I won't let him touch you  ever again. I know you’ve heard this a lot, but this one is different. Hikari, I promise that I will protect you and you’ll never have to see him again.” I have made unkept promises before, but this isn’t going to be one of them. Having her trembling in my arms makes me all the more determined to make sure she stays away from the monster. I brought her out of her hell on earth once, and I will do it as many times as it takes to keep her from it. 

 

She raise her face from my shirt and looks up at me. “Shuu, please don’t let me go back,” she pleas.

 

“Never again,” I answer, wiping the vomit from the side of her face with the end if my sleeve. “Let's go sit in your room, we need to talk.” She nods and allows me to stand. As soon as I am up she latches onto my arm. I don’t mind, she probably just doesn’t want to lose me like the sense of security. We sit on her bed once more.

 

“Shuu, how do you know Natsume?” she says the inevitable question.

 

I take a deep breath, knowing that it is finally time to say what I’ve been holding back for so long. “Hikari, the truth is; I’ve known you far longer than what you think.”

____

 

It was a little over a month after I lost Sakura. I was in a very unpleasant state and it wasn’t the best part of my life. I ignored my school work, brothers, and playing music in general. One day, I believe it was in late March, I was assigned a task from my father. He said that there was a girl that could possibly be very important and useful for him. At the time, we didn’t know which of the Komori girls were the one he wanted; Yui was the true goal. But at the time, the girl Father was interested in was staying with a family called the Keis. Because my father preferred to stay in the shadows of things, I was sent out to see her. Like most of my responsibilities, I try to lay it off and give it to Reiji, but Father wouldn’t allow it. He thought it will help get me out of the slump I was in and I needed to learn to take responsible for situations.

 

I don’t know the exact details, but I ended up going to the Kei house to see the environment she was living in and whether or not I could tell if she was the one we needed; even though I didn’t know what we needed her for. I was sent to the house right as the sun was setting. Although I knew the house was protected by guards, it made me uncomfortable having so many people around, staring at me. I rolled my eyes and continued into the house. I was lead down the hall into a social area.

 

“Welcome, Shuu Sakamaki,” a main greeted me as I entered the room. The man looked about nineteen and with dark orange hair, which was a bit longer than my own. He was dressed in a maroon, dress shirt with a black necktie and pants. “I’m Natsume Kei. Most address me as Mr.Kei, but Natsume will do.”

 

“It’s nice to meet you,” I said dryly, my voice was not caring the emotion my spoke of. He gestured for me to sit down on a plush chair, which I did. We had small talk for a few minutes. I didn’t bother to ask many questions and only half listened to him talk on and on about his family business.

 

“That’s enough of that,” Natsume said, finally sparing me of the torment. “I bet I’m boring you.” 

 

“No, not really.” You have no idea. 

 

“You are here to see Hikari, correct?” For a split second, his face had a disgusted expression, but it was gone in an instant.

 

“Oh, the girl, yeah,” I said. I didn’t even remember her name up until that point. I heard footsteps approaching from down the hall. A second later, the door opened. A maid stepped in and bowed and was soon followed by a girl. For a moment, my heart seems to stop. I stared at the girl with wide eyes. Her long hair and frame can only remind me of the love I lost not long ago. But she opened her eyes and the feeling is gone. A pair of seemingly lifeless, pink eyes stared blankly into the distance, nothing like the sky blue ones I remember so vividly. Get a hold of yourself, Shuu. Whoever the person is, they aren’t Sakura, so calm down.

 

“There she is,” Natsume said, standing up from his seat. He walked over to the girl and I see her tensed. He placed his hand on her shoulder. “Hikari, this is Shuu Sakamaki, he is here to talk with you.” 

 

“Yes, Mas-” the girl began and cuts off. I saw Natsume tighten his grip on her shoulder and her wince. “Yes, Mr.Kei.”

 

“Wonderful. Be a good girl now and don’t cause any problems,” he said, speaking to her like she was a small child.

 

“Yes, Mr.Kei,” she said quietly. He patted her on the shoulder, which made her flinch and him and the maid exited the room. The girl, Hikari, walked to the chair Natsume was sitting in. I studied the girl. She was wearing a light blue, long-sleeved high low dress with black leggings. Her long, brown hair was kept out and has a light blue burette near her bangs. She looked about sixteen, although I could tell she was a bit small for her again. Even with the scent lotion and perfume she had on, I was able to smell a hint of blood and filth from the girl.

 

“H-Hello, I’m Hikari, it's n-nice to meet you,” she stuttered quietly, not looking up at me.

 

“I’m Shuu,” I said slowly. There was a long pause. I expected her to say something, which is how most conversations care on. “Do you not have anything to say?”

 

It took her some time to say, “I c-can’t speak unless sp-spoken to or asked a question.”

 

“Who told you to do that?” I questioned.

 

“Mast-uh, Mr.Kei,” she said. 

 

The answer instantly captured my attention. From her stutter and flinch to almost saying ‘master’ and smell blood, I could tell that there was something wrong there. But there was no way I could say that without getting more clues.

 

“What do you do here?” I asked a fairly usual question, just in case someone was listening and was trying to see if I was acting suspiciously.

 

“Um…” she said, thinking very hard. It was like she couldn't remember things she did on normal bases. “I b-bake and read,” she said.

 

“Do you like it here?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“How does Natsume treat you?”

 

“Kindly and care,” she said, keeping her answers short and simple. 

 

I cocked my head to the side, trying to get a good look at human’s face. “Hikari,” I said, and I saw her body tighten. “Raise your head and look at me,” I commanded.

 

She seemed hesitant to perform the task. I noticed her hand reach for her hair and tug at it. She then raised her head and looks at me. Her eyes, like earlier, seemed lifeless and looked in my direction but not at me. 

 

We didn't talk much after that, there wasn't much to say. I asked simple questions, which she would give an equally simplistic answer. She would look away for me every so often, but would then jolt and gaze back in my directions; almost like she was afraid to go against my command. 

 

After some time, Natsume returned. “Sorry to interrupt,” he said. “Dinner is ready in the dining room.” I nodded and rose from my seat. I was only a few steps from the door when I noticed that Hikari had yet to leave her chair. 

 

Natsume seemed to have caught my gaze. “Oh, her. Come now, Hikari.”

 

She was on high alert when he said her name. She out of the chair and behind us in an instant. We head down the halls to the dining area. 

 

“She wasn't a problem, was she?” Natsume said, and it took me a moment to realize he was speaking to me.

 

“No,” I said, giving him a glance for the side. 

 

“Good, she can be so troubling sometimes it's annoying.”

 

I looked at said girl. She followed about two paces behind us, her eyes in our direction, but it seemed like she was looking right through us. She looked up for a moment and our eyes met. Her eyes seem to focus on my for a split second before she stares out the ground. I look over to see Natsume staring down harshly at her. He drops the expression immediately.

 

“Don't pay her too much attention,” he said. “She quiet...shy.”

 

So that's you're going to call it, shyness. “Understood,” I say as we approach the dining area. The door is already open, revealing a not so large yet exquisite room. There were three spots already set, inviting us to sit. Natsume takes the seat at the head of the table and Hikari and I sat on either side of him. The second we settled in, the food was brought out by three different maids. I started down at the stake, rare just how I like it and steamed vegetables. 

 

I thank the maid and give Natsume nod before consuming my food. I looked up at Hikari, who stared at her food in confusion. She dared to look up at Natsume, but her gaze quickly went back to the plate in front of her.

 

“Hikari, eat your food,” Natsume said coldly. I noticed her faced  was a bit shocked at the command, but she muttered a ‘yes, Mr.Kei’, and began to eat her food. She hesitantly picked up her fork and began to slowly eat her food. 

 

“Shuu, would you like some wine?” Natsume asked me.

 

“You look a bit young for some,” I challenged, trying to get my mind off the girl’s strange behavior.

 

“I will be twenty by November,” he said with a smug smile. “But let’s not sweat the details. Enjoy yourself.” A main in a suit brings out a bottle of alcohol, filling both Natsume and my wine glasses. “Let’s keep this a secret, okay? Whether you're a minor or not, you should be able to have good wine.”

 

I’m actually several centuries year old, but, yeah, let’s not sweat the details. “I’m up for that,” I said, taking a sip from my cup. 

 

“I know you’re here to converse with Hikari,” Natsume said after drinking some wine, “but I would love to know about you.”

 

“I’m not a very interesting person,” I said. I just didn’t feel like talking to this extremely suspicious guy. His behavior is oddly skeptical and makes me feel uneasy. 

 

“No need to be modest. So, do you have hobbies of any sort, you seem like the kind of man to enjoy a very calming pastime.”

 

“I play a bit of the piano and violin,” I said with a shrug.

 

“Interesting. I only know a small bit of it.”

 

Hikari mumbled something softly and she quickly went wide eyed once the words left her mouth, like she realized she slipped up. Badly.

 

“What was that Hikari?” Natsume made with gritted teeth. I wonder why he’s so mad, but then I remembered what she said. ‘I c-can’t speak unless sp-spoken to or asked a question.’

 

“S-Sorry, Mr.Kei,” she said, a bit louder. “I shouldn’t have spoken.”

 

“Well you might as well repeat yourself,” he snapped.

 

“I-I said that I als-so like playing,” she said, looking as if she wanted to melt into the chair.

 

“Do you play often?” I question the girl.

 

“I haven’t f-for a while.”

 

“Why is that?”

 

“Unfortunately, our instruments have been damaged,” Natsume said without a bit of sadness in his voice. Hikari hesitantly nodded, idly moving her food around her plate

 

“One of my brothers broke my violin before,” I said out of the blue, surprising myself I never shared random bits of information of my past like that. 

 

“One of you brothers?” Natsume says with a forced smile. “You have more than one.”

 

“Five,” I said with a sigh. “Five, annoying, brothers brothers that I wish I didn’t have,” I said with a groan. Both Natsume and Hikari expressions changed like they are trying to hide something from me. They look like they are in pain, but try to mimic a happy expression; well, Natsume was the only one giving a readable emotion.

 

“May I be excused, Mr.Ki?” Hikari asked. 

 

He gives her a hard glare before nodding. The burette rises from her seat and is walked out of the room by a guard. Natsume soon downs his wines and requests for a refill. I try not to mind the uncomfortable atmosphere and finish my food. I excuse myself and head to the room where I was originally. 

 

She was staring out the window, side turned towards me. I notice that her right hand is up the left sleeve of her dress. I the faint smell of blood grew and I stared a the girl.

 

“Hikari?” I questioned.

 

She quickly turned my way, her eyes wide. She pulls her hand from under her sleeve and I notice blood under her fingernails.The blood fingers go to her hair and she begins to twirl it around. “H-Hello,” she said.

 

“Hikari, are you really okay here?” I said, not thinking of my words before they left my mouth.

 

“W-Why would you ask that? I said I did,” she countered, looking back out the window. “I-I just want…” She started but trailed off. “Shuu, I ask you something?”

 

“Yes,” I said, hoping she would tell me something that can help me confirm or dismiss my thoughts that this place isn’t what it seems.

 

“What...what is it like out there?” she questioned. “Has it changed?”

 

I follow her gaze to the window that allows us to see the garden and gate in the distance. “It’s always the same, yet always changing,” I said. “But you have to go out there yourself to know what it's really like.”

 

“Hm,” she hums, not looking at me.

 

“If you could have anything right now, what would it be?” I asked the girl. I thought it would be to go outside, but her answer surprised me.

 

“I want to see my sister one last time,” she said, tears swelling in her eyes.

 

“What do you mean ‘one last time’?” I questioned.

 

“I want to see her before I die.”

 

The statement alarmed me. I made sure no one is around, if she was caught say something they don’t want her to, she might have gotten in real big trouble. “Is Natsume hur-”

 

The door opens before I can finish my sentence. A pissed off looking Natsume is in the doorway. “Shuu, it is time for you to depart,” he says.

 

I want to question the man about the doing at the house, but I don’t know how this will end. I can tell that the girl has been through something pretty traumatic, and I don’t want anything else like that to happen to her. I kept my suspension under wraps and-and nodded. I walk over to Natsume and out the doorway. 

 

“I hope you have a good night,” Natsume says. I turn around to shake his hand. When I do, I don’t look at him. Just where I left her, Hikari looked at me. A bit of emotion is present on her face. A single tear escapes her watery, pink eyes which were filled with sadness. She mouthed something that still haunts me. Everything after that was a blur. I left the house and went home. 

 

As I laid in my bed, I couldn’t stop thinking of Hikari. Her similarities to Sakura did shock me, but there was more to that. He constant flinching and stutter. All of her skin was covered, almost hiding something and how she was scratching herself until she bled. She was hesitant of everything like she was scared to make a mistake and had to be commanded to do simple task. The lifelessness of her eyes and her face void of expression until the very end. 

 

It flashed in my head again. Her sad eyes and unshed tears. And what she mouthed to me. I didn’t have to hear the words for it to pain me. What was happening for her to say something like that?

 

“I just want to die.”

 


	38. Protect Her

“I just want to die.” The words gave me a wave of shock. I knew something at that house wasn’t right, but for the girl to wish to end her life, it just didn’t sit well with me. Death is something that should be avoided at all cost, yet she looked as if she was pleading for it to come. Once someone left, they can't come back, just like Sakura.

I didn't know the girl, but I felt like I was obligated to help her. I have turned my back on people and haven’t done the right thing multiple times, but I couldn’t do that to the girl. And to think that she was probably being abused or something of the sort and her final wish was to see her sister.

I got out of my bed and grab a paper and pen. I wrote to the Church for the first time. I usually avoided any contact with them. When I was given the files with information about the brides that would eventually arrive here, I always gave them to Reiji. This was the first time I took action on my own accord. I wrote to the head priest, informing him of my suspension. I had to help this girl, or at least tried. I mailed the later that day, not wanting to wait.

I never knew what happened to her. I was never given a reply in any way. I thought about her from time to time, wondering if she was okay and if her desire to end her life vanished. After seeing her that night, I decided to fix myself. I stopped dwelling on the past and Sakura’s death. I don’t know what exactly happened to me, but the change was for the best.

Then Yui came. The moment I was given Yui’s file, I instantly remembered Hikari. I flipped through it, but it didn’t give me a clue about her sister. Soon after Yui arrived at the manor, I took a trip to the Church. I talked to the head priest, who told me he did receive my letter but was unable to reply. He confirmed my suspicion of the girl’s unhealthy living environment. He then told me that she was being hospitalized at the moment.

I remembered the words she told me all those months ago, that all she wanted was to see her sister. That day, without even bothering to discuss it with Reiji or my father, I told the priest I wanted Hikari sent to the manor. He gave me a confused look and tried to get an explanation from me, but I didn’t give one. I just repeated my request and left.

The next week I was sent a letter and Hikari’s file. It told me that she wouldn’t be arriving until late October, but it satisfied me. I wondered why I was feeling like she was my responsibility like I was forced to make sure this human was fine. Maybe I was being given another chance to care for someone, maybe I just took her because she reminded me of the lover I lost. Whatever drove me to take this girl was strong enough to make me go as far as making her a bride.

I was surprised when I was told that she was going to arrive month or so early, but I was ready to see her again. I waited in the greeting area that night, waiting for the girl I thought so much about to enter the manor.

I heard the door open and a soft hello. I thought it was Yui at the time, which frustrated me. I opened my eyes to see Hikari standing not too far away from me. She was wearing a pink top and black slacks. Her once long hair was cut to just past her shoulders. I looked into her eyes, which were different from last time. They were neither filled with sadness nor seemingly lifeless. I secretly wishing she would recognize me, but I didn’t seem that she did. I wanted to say something about our past encounter, but I thought it would be best not to. Maybe she did remember but was hesitant. She still had a stutter, but I thought that was from me frightening her.

I lead her to the room with my brothers. The whole time the idiots were discussing things, I looked at the girl. She did look better than last time. She didn’t hesitate to look at any of us, but she did look nervous. One thing that really surprised me was when she yelled at my brothers. I didn’t know that the timid looking human was capable of raising her voice at all. This was the first of many reasons that caused me to stop thinking of her as a possible replacement for Sakura but as her own person. I never had intentions of becoming intimate with the girl.

I knew she didn’t spend too long out of the hospital, so it didn’t surprise me when she fainted after seeing her sister. The mixture of nervousness, anger, shock, and probably fright wasn’t the best for her heart. I removed her from the room to take her to her own. I picked up her dropped duffle bag on the way also.

Once we arrived at the room, I laid her on the bed. I looked at her once again, trying to find a sign of her past life. Her shirt folder up slightly, revealing a small portion of her stomach. I noticed a red mark on her skin and, without an ounce of hesitation, pull up her shirt. My eyes grew wide at the girls marked stomach. Varying in size and colors were several scars crossing her olive screen. Most of them look like inflected ones, a few looked like they were from surgery. So he was hurting her, but why? Was he just an abusive prick or did he have a motive. Maybe he was a drunk, he openly drank wine in front of me.

I continued my search of the girl. I moved her so she was on her side, and sure enough, there were some on her back. Although I was a bit skeptical at first, I decided to check her entire body. I removed her pants, inspecting her legs. I was more shocked to see a tattoo than the scars themselves. It was Natsume’s name along with a cherry blossom.

I then find opened her bag, found some clothes, dressed her, and left. I didn’t think it was necessary for me to pay her too much mind. All I needed to do was to make sure she stayed alive and silently hoped that she would remember me. 

___

I was heading to the music room like I did every day. There wasn't anything for me to do at this school and I refuse to surround myself with annoying people. I rarely played the instruments at the time, just rested on the couch in the back because it was the most comfortable spot in the building. I was surprised when I made my way down the hall and heard the sound of the violin coming from the room. None of the other students ever entered the room anymore, so who in the world would go in there.

I wasn’t sure what I was expecting, but seeing Hikari playing the violin wasn’t a possibility in my head. Her eyes were closed and she was playing a somewhat dreary piece. I watched as she glided the bow over the wooden instrument with incredible skill. I remembered that she told me she played the both the piano and violin, which I guess wasn’t a lie. I small smile tugged at my lips as I thought of the songs she could play.

Slowly her eyes open and landed on me. She paused mid-note, her whole body went stiff. She stared at me like she was waiting for me to say or do something.

“Finished,” was all I said to the girl. She gave a meek nod and continued her piece. She stared at me with the pink eyes as he played, and it seemed like she never even blinked. She completely the piece and began to put away the instrument.

“What are you doing?" I asked the girl.

"Putting it away. Isn't this your music room?" she said, trying to return the instrument quickly so she could.

For some odd reason, I didn't want to her to leave. I wanted her to stay, but I didn't know how to ask without sounding needed or command her without sounding threatening.

"Not necessarily," I finally said with a shrug of my shoulders. I made my way past her and to the sofa in the back. "Continue playing," I requested as I laid down. Without getting any sheets, she began to play piece after piece. Hearing the sound calmed me and made me a bit happy inside. I had been months since someone played for me and it was a good feeling.

After about twenty minutes, she stopped playing. A few minutes later, I felt her brushing my hair away from my face. Her surprisingly soft hand was warm and I had the strange desire to lean into her touch. I stopped myself before I did and she ended up leaving in a stuttering mess. I tried to call out to her, but she was already rushing down the hall.

After that, I found myself making a deal with her the next day. The need to have her near me was still present, so it was inevitable that I would find a way to keep her with me. I thought it was the captivating feeling of having her play for me. I even spent my lunch period organizing the remainder of the shelf for her.

But with each session day in that room with her, I felt like I was growing closer to her. She spoke to me occasionally and we had minimum conversation. I felt like I was walking down the same path that lead me to heartbreak and sadness, but in some way, the one with Hikari was different.

When those boys from her class were trying to do who know what, I felt entitled to protect her. To intervene and help her at all cost.

The need to protect her was like a double edge sword because it caused me to hurt her. I soon began feeling weaker and weaker as time crawled by. I knew it was foolish for me to try to resist the source of my survival, but taking Hikari’s blood was out of the question. I knew it sounded ridiculous, but I felt like it was a horrible thought to think of taking her blood and inflicting physical pain on her in any way. Even taken Yui made me think that Hikari would dislike.

I struggled for days trying to overcome my need for blood. Hikari was able to see my ill state and acted upon it. That day I laid in my bed, trying to calm my flaring nerves. I felt like a starving man, but I knew I could only blame myself. I didn’t know whether I was supposed to be happy or concerned when Hikari came into my room. I never took the initiative to see her outside of the music room, so seeing her walk over to my bed filled me with an indescribable joy. She came over to me, yet she didn’t look me in the eyes.

“Do you need something?” I questioned her as I sat up. I felt a stabbing like pain from the movement, but I tried my best not to let Hikari see my struggle. She was agonizingly nervous, so I tried to speak to her to calm her some. It seemed to work because she was soon speaking with less hesitation. I then closed my eye and leaned my head against the headboard of my bed. I was waiting for her to address the reason she came to my room. I honestly didn’t mind her being in my room, I just hated being in that agonizing state in front of her.

“Shuu,” she said softly. I opened my eyes and looked at her. My heart pound harshly and my eyes grew exponentially. Hikari's hair was tied in a ponytail, her shirt unbuttoned to reveal her neck and collarbone. I felt my mouth water at the sight and my instinct told me to bite that second. To mark her all over and drink every lost drop of blood in her body. I tried to fight the urge, to tell Hikari to leave and not care about me, but she was too stubborn. I ended up blacking out and latched my fangs into her skin. All I could see was the redness of blood, my nose filled with it irony scent, it sweet taste making me want more and more. I was lost in my own world as the pain that consumed me for days left. I only snapped out of it once I felt her hands in my hair. She pulled me from my bloodlust and back to reality.

I was shocked when my eyes focused on Hikari. There were several pairs of piercing wounds on her neck. The most frightening part were the four gaping wounds near her collarbone and shoulder, each one spilling blood. I stared wide eyes at her as she smiled back. She then went limp in my arms. I stared at the girl in her unconscious state and at the damage I’d done. I couldn’t wrap my head around what I just did.

“You’re a mess,” a voice said, snapping me out of my shocked state. I looked up to see Reiji staring down at Hikari. “You really know how to screw thing up,” he said and I wasn’t sure if he was talking to me or Hikari. I said nothing as he picked up the limp girl and left my room. What did I do? I placed my hands over my head and stare into nothing. I hurt her and made her pass out for fuck’s sake. I shouldn’t have let it come to this, why was I so stubborn?

I let out a frustrated yell. I slam my fist against the mattress in anger. I got off my bed and tore off the sheets that are spotted with Hikari’s blood. I rip the fabric to shreds, but it can’t have possibly calmed my anger. I stripped the curtains from the window and kicked over the coffee table. I stomped over to my desk and the chair from under it. I was seconds away from smashing it into the wall, but I stop. I drop the furniture onto the floor and stared at the open drawer of the desk. The jeweled flower hair piece that belonged to Sakura was visible. The shiny stones seemed to sparkle at me, making me think of the girl.

I quickly made my way out of me room and outside. On my way out, I informed Tanaka, the butler like familiar, about the conditions of my room and that I wanted it fixed by the time I got back. The soon to rise sun didn’t bother me as I head over to the area Sakura and I constantly hung around when we were in the manor. I walked into the meadow, heading to the very far corner of it. In the corner is a sakura tree, currently bare. I stared at the spot where I bared my past lover. The knight replied in my head as fresh and vivid as ever, I sat down and leaned against the trunk of the tree.

“Hey, Sakura, it been a while,” I said lowly. “I’m so sorry for what happened that day. But, I said I would move on and let the past stay in the past and won't let it control me. I’ve been doing well so far, but this girl has come by. I met her before and I thought, hey why not help her? She reminds me so much of you, caring, loves music, she even looks a bit like you. But she is her own person, she isn’t as soft-spoken as you, she is actually quite bold and voices her thoughts. She is very interesting and I find myself being drawn to her. I want to protect her, but I hurt her real bad today. It took me some time to realize why,” I said, allowing as single tear leave my eye. “I think I’ve fallen for her.”

I looked down at the flowers growing around me. “Hey, am I allowed to love again? Can I tell her that I feel this way when I’m hiding so much from her? I didn’t say anything about you and she hasn’t recognized me yet, but I feel as if I rather have her stay like this. I don’t know if I want her to remember me, to know that I’ve seen her old self. Maybe she just wants to forget about it and leave it all in the past, and me talking about it would upset her. I try to care about the feelings of the people I care about, I already lost Edgar and you, and I was close to losing Izayoi and Yuzuki also. I don’t want to show my feelings just to be hurt and hurt others. I can’t continue to live this way, feeling the pain and guilt weigh me down day after day.”

I let out a dry, forced laugh. “Sorry, I should watch my words. Life is a precious gift, right? ‘Pain is part of living, whether you live forever or die today, you have to keep your head up and walk forward, go where you are happy and stay’, that’s what you said when we talked about that book. Tch, you were so philosophical at times it sickened me.” Even with the sad feeling in my heart, I manage to small. “But you were right. But would you be mad at me if the place where I am happy is with someone else?”

Of course, no one verbally answered my question. A breeze blew, making the leaves in the tree and flower sway. A pink and blue flowers then landed on my lap. I picked up the two flowers, inspecting them. The blue was soft, like the color of a cloudless sky, the pink was more vibrant. Another gust of wind carried the blue one out of my palm, the pink one remained. A smiled down at my hand and fist the flower in it.

I stood up and placed my hands in my pocket. I took a few steps and then turned back “Just remember, you will always be my first love. You’re not being replaced, I’m just going to live by what you told me, so please understand.”

____

I didn’t know how I was supposed to take control of the situation. I wanted to apologize for my actions, but I couldn’t seem to get a hold of my own emotions. Her unknown feelings made me feel unsure of my next action. I went to the music room, wishing that Hikari was already there waiting for me. It was a foolish wish, yet I felt so perturbed when the room was empty. I waited and waited, but the door never opened.

I wasn’t going to start a fit again, especially not in this room. I turned to the piano in the room, wondering if it could cure my aching heart. I sat on the bench and adjusted the seat. It only took me a moment to figure out what I wanted to play. I began to play the instrument with all my heart. I let the song reflect the pain I held inside me. Every note cared a bit of the negative emotion away. After playing the second song, the door to the room opened. I looked over to see Hikari staring at me.

“Hi, Shuu,” she said after a long pause. I was baffled to see her, I doubted she would come to me first, but there she was, standing in the doorway. I felt my heart skip a beat and I looked into her eyes.

“Hey,” I said. She gave me a half smile and started to ramble. I wasn’t even focused on her words, all I could think was how grateful I was and the weight seemed to be lifted off of me. She walked over and sat by me. He nonsensical babbling stopped and she smiled up at me.

“You’re back,” was all I could say to her. I felt as if it was too good to be true.

“Hmm, yeah. Oh, I’m sorry I wasn’t here for the past few days, I had detention. I was supposed to have it for the rest of the week, but I was cut short. Lucky me, eh?”

Yeah, I know, I’m the one who arranged it. I thought it wasn’t far for you to have to have detention because of my selfishness. “Why did you come back?” I asked. I was happy she was with me, but I needed to know why. Was she here to give me a piece of her mind or did she come just because this is where she’s always at during lunch.

“Wha-what do you mean ‘why did I come back’?” She muttered, her eyes going down to the keys of the piano. “I...I came back because..because... ” she trailed off and then looked me in the eyes. “Because I wanted to be here..with  you.”

The answer made me want to wrap my arms around her and promise not to let go. It had been so long since I felt that about of ecstasy. Knowing she was here for me made all my uneasiness evaporate. Although I was still unsure about showing my love and happiness, I was still able to stay in the room with her much like the days prior.

Day after day I felt need turn to interest and interest to love, but I refused to act upon my feelings. The day we played our first duet and shed silent tears, all I wanted to do was to hold her; to assure her that everything was fine. I just couldn't bring myself to do it. I didn't know how Hikari felt about me. I didn't know if she disgusted me if I was just one of the people restricting her from her freedom. I actually feared that she loathed me, that I was nothing but a substitute for Natsume. But the little hope I had that she liked me as a person was enough for me to try and give her some comfort. That little hope that she thought I was decent allowed me to hold on to my feelings and not try to extinguish them.

I knew she was scared was emotionally and mentally than physically. The day I threatened her showed me that perfectly. It took me some time to compose myself after she left for me to plan my action. I wasn’t going to let it go and let her make the first move like when I bit her. I left the game room in search of her. I heard a shout from the music room which I knew could only be Hikari’s. I rushed to the room, panicked coursing through my body.

I open the door to the room to see Hikari, knees to her chest and hands over her head, and Reiji, who was staring at the girl. The still fresh memories of Sakura raced through my head.  _ You aren’t harming her, not this time. _

“What did you do!?” I shouted at my brother.

“Believe me, I’ve done nothing,” he snapped. “She was al-”

“Just leave!” I shouted. Reiji gave me a disgusted look before disappearing. I made my way over to Hikari. She was curled up in a ball, pleading for forgiveness in a very low tone. It pained me to see her like this, because of me. I placed my hand on her arms, trying to calm her. She tensed at the touch. I rubbed her arm, trying to soothe her, but she didn’t react in a positive way.

“Hikari,” I said in the softest voice I could speak in. “Move your arms, Hikari.” Hesitantly, she lowered her arms from her face and I felt a bit relieved that we were making some progress. She wouldn't look me in the eye.

“Hikari, please open your eyes,” I pleaded. I tried to say her name as much as possible because I knew she liked it and it gave her some kind of comfort.

Her teary pink eyes looked at me with tremendous fear and sadness. “M-Master, I-I’m sorry,” she said in a hiccupping sob. Having her call me thought made my heart drop. Did I hurt her so much that she saw just like the man the tormented her?

“No, Hikari,” I said with the shake of my head. “It’s Shuu.”

Realization washed over her. I saw a meek smile begin to form on her lips but it was soon replaced by a frown and a worried expression. She began to ramble about not leaving and begging for me to forgive her. I couldn’t listen to her words and knew I had to do something. Without a second thought, I place my lips on hers.

When I broke away, I looked at her. She stared at me with a shocked expression. I smiled at her, showing her it everything was fine. I wiped the tears from her cheek and pulled her into a hug. Although she couldn’t see it, a smile was plastered on my face. Finally telling her how I felt made me feel better than ever. I then felt her wrap her hand around me, holding me.

“I love you, Hikari,” I said. “And I  _ will  _ protect you.”

 


	39. Recovery

**Hikari's POV**   
  


I don’t interrupt Shuu as he tells me everything. I nod my head every so often, but a verbal word never leaves my mouth. I don’t know what to say, I’m still trying to get everything in my head. He actually knew me, he’s met me. How could I not know any of this? He finishes his story and I just stare at him, unable to speak. He doesn’t look my eyes, his eyes remain on the floor. All the information seems to make my aching headache grow at a painful rate. 

 

“Are you going to say anything?” he asked, finally breaking the silence in the room. I’ve gotten used to the silence between us over time, but I can’t remember the last time it was so thick and unbearable. 

 

“I...just give me a second,” I say calmly.

 

“Should I go?” Before I can even answer, he begins to rise from the bed. 

 

Panic rushes through me in that small window of time. I can’t be alone now, I can’t. “No!” I shout, grabbing onto the back of his shirt. My own voice makes my head throb painfully and I wince at it. Shuu turns around, gives me a look that I can only describe as pity, and sits back down. 

 

“You...I..” I say, trying to find a coherent thought. “Don’t leave me,” I finally say meekly. My hands move to his upper arm near his shoulder and I clench the fabric tightly, my hands trembling slightly. I lean my head on his shoulders and try to fight the sob I feel beginning to form. “Just stay with me, please, please don’t leave me.” I don’t want to be left, he can come back and I will be completely defenseless. I’ve been alone for too long and I hate the feeling.

 

“I won't leave you,” he says, moving his arm and pulling me into a hug. I allow his body warmth to surround me, warming my body. His arms feel so protective and his scent is no longer foreign to me. I can remember his protection, how he held me that day when I had a panic attack. Shuu has been there for me ever since day one and I understand why. He was the one that watched me after my ‘disturbance’, he was the one that brushed away my tears when I thought of the past, he was the one that made sure Keita and Haru didn’t harm me. 

 

“Hikari, do you really not remember anything from when I met you?” he asks softly.

 

I shake my head, my forehead rubbing against his chest. “I can’t remember a thing, even after you told me. Why is that?”

 

“I’m not quite sure. Maybe you acquired some sort of amnesia or you were mentally at your limit and you just didn’t register it all.”

 

I pull out of his warm embrace and look him in the eyes. “Why didn’t you tell me, though?”

 

“I didn't know if you wanted to remember,” he says. “I thought you rather forget about the past and if I just suddenly reminded you of it, I thought you’d be upset.”

 

I nod, understanding his reasoning, but I don’t say anything to it.

 

“Are you mad at me?” he ask in a voice that actually sounds the slight bit sorrowful.

 

“No,” I say, leaning into his chest. “I don’t know how I feel about it actually, but know I’m not mad. I feel a bit uneasy knowing that you see me in that state. Just by your story, I can tell I was a complete mess. It is a time in my life that I rather not have people know about, I barely even told Yui any of the details. But, even if it wasn’t real, I love the feeling that I had a blank slate, that I could start a new without anyone knowing who I was or what happened to me. The thought itself gave me enough courage to try and move on, but I really couldn’t go very far.” I let out a dry laugh that doesn’t ease the tension in the slightest. “I guess what went down tonight kind of helped me move on.”

 

“I’m sorry,” I hear him say barely above a whisper.

 

“Shuu?” I say his name hesitantly. He tightens his embrace around me, his body seemingly crushing me. 

 

“I’m so sorry, Hikari,” he says much lower. “I said I would protect you, that I wouldn’t let you get hurt again. I didn’t want anything to happen, this time, I wanted to be able to protect the person I love. I just couldn’t repeat that damn cycle of opening up just to harm other and myself. I wanted, this time, to be different, for nothing to happen. But, I failed.”

 

It seems at times like this I can never say anything. Any time he starts to speak of his past or problems, I just can’t say anything that seems right. But I know that I can't stay silent. I tighten my own grip around him, showing him that I’m also here for him. “I’m fine now, Shuu, you didn’t fail at anything.”

 

“But I have,” he say in a harsh whisper. “I wasn’t here when everything was happening. I left you knowing a complete stranger was walking through those doors. I don’t know what happened but when I walked into that room after smelling him and blood, I knew I messed up big time. You don’t know how much it hurt me seeing you on the floor in agony. I’m always such an idiot, I’m so blind the obvious and I hate it.

 

“Hikari, you make me feel emotions that rarely ever surface. I feel unadulterated hate towards people at times. You can make me feel genuinely happy. You make me notice how dumb and unintelligent I am. When it comes to you, I can actually be scared. I’m frightened that I’m not suited to protect you and I’m scared I will lose someone again.”

 

I feel something wet land on my upper back. Shocked, I pull away from Shuu and look at him. A tear has escaped his glassy eyes and I feel my stomach sink. Shuu was crying over me. 

 

“Shuu,” I say, causing him to look at me. I stare into his sapphire blue eyes, allowing myself to get lost in them for a moment. The eyes that usually show boredness, actually show sadness for once. I lean over and plant a small kiss on his lips. “I don’t want you to leave and you don’t want to lose me,” I say as I wipe away his tears. I give him a meek, and probably sad looking, smile. “I think we can find a compromise between the two.”

 

He gives me a small smile and nods his head. He kisses me on my forehead as he runs his fingers through my hair. “Do you want to rest?”

 

“Is it even late?” I ask as I turn my head to look at the digital clock on my nightstand. I’m going to tell him it's only three when my eyes travel to the date. I hitch a breath as realization floods over me. 

 

“Is something wrong?” I hear Shuu say. 

 

I shake my head. “It's nothing.”

 

“Hikari, please talk to be about things,” Shuu says. I know he's right and I shouldn't make him worry. 

 

“It's the tenth November,” I say, trying not to let my sadness surface. “The anniversary of Kaname’s death.”

 

There's a moment of silence before Shuu says, “His brother?” I only nod my head. 

 

I can only think that Natsume came today on purpose. Maybe he wanted to intentionally see me today because of the history of the date. The thought makes my gut twist in an uncomfortable way. 

 

“Hey,” Shuu says, getting my attention. “It's okay if you don’t want to forget about him, but don’t beat yourself up over it.”

 

I nod my head, knowing if I dwell on it I will just upset myself further. 

 

“Are you hungry?” he murmur into my head hair.

 

“I don’t know if I will be able to keep anything down,” I reply. “But I think some tea would help.”

 

“Sure, I will tell Tanaka to make some.” I look up at him and give him a raised brow. “Don’t worry, there won't be anything in it this time.”

 

I let out a tired laugh and nod my head. I cuddle further into his chest, letting out a sigh. Throughout my life, I’ve been so vulnerable, but now he gives me a sense of protection. “Can we stay like this a for just a bit longer?” he lets out a low sigh, although I know he doesn’t mind. 

 

“Shuu, I feel the safest with you, so don’t worry about it.”

 

“Don't even think about me leaving you because I never want to go anywhere when I’m with you.”

 

* * *

 

 

Things soon fell back into place after the unfortunate events. Laito and Ayato were curious, and by that, I mean extremely noisy, about what happened the day Natsume came. Anytime they tried to bring it up, either Reiji or Shuu would shut it down immediately.

 

Like usually, I went to school when Monday came. When I say Keita and Haru Monday, they told me that they saw Natsume earlier that week. The man did say that he met an old friend who told them about me, so I guess it was them. I never told them what happened when I saw him and kindly asked them not to bring him up. 

 

The only thing that was different was when I went to the music room. Anytime I tried to play, I would fall short or completely draw a blank. Shuu never tried to push me and would tell to take a break even if I didn't play a single line. I didn't like that block as it's been bothersome to deal with. 

 

The week soon ended with nothing life changing happening. Things have been normal for the rest, yet I still feel like Natsume is going to come back. Shuu assures me that he is gone for good every time I feel uneasy. 

 

I lay in bed with Shuu, sleep seeming like a force that has long abandoned me. I don't want to move, fearing I will wake him, but I feel uncomfortably warm under his thick sheets. 

 

I slide out of the bed and walk over to his bathroom. I turn on the facets and splash water onto my face, letting the cool liquid calm me. I look in the mirror at my reflection. The dark circles that were under my eyes are no longer there. The girl in the glass looks like me, but I feel as if I lost a piece of myself and I have no idea on how to get it back. I sigh and turn off the water. 

 

“Something wrong?” I hear a voice says. I look over to see Shuu leaning against the doorframe in his boxers. I’m also in my underwear, but neither of us are fazed by the lack of clothes.

 

“I’m not quite sure,” I say honestly. I try to answer his questions as truthful as I can. He says he needs to know how I feel about things. ”I just can’t sleep at the moment.”

 

He walks over to me and slides his arms over my shoulders. Shuu’s places his head on my shoulder and says, “Are you sick?”

 

“No,” I say. “I’ve just been feeling off these past few days.”

 

He lets out a hum, kisses right under my ear, and raises himself from my shoulder. “How about we go out again?”

 

I look over at him, feeling excitement slowly fill me. “Really?”

 

He nods and tells me to go to my room and get dressed to leave. I throw on my pajamas I wore into the room earlier and head to my room. I quickly strip once I’m in there and put on a purple, red, black, and gray patterned shirt and black pants. I brush my hair and put it in a high ponytail. I grab my boots from the corner of my room and head to the greeting area. 

 

When I arrive I see Shuu on the phone.

 

“Yeah,” he says. “We’ll be there in about twenty.” he nods his head and then turns to me. “She’s coming, ‘kay.” he places the phone in its holder. “Ready?” he asks me. I nod my head and head for the door. We step into the limo and pull out of the property. 

 

“Are we going to the plaza place again?” I ask.

 

“Yeah,” he says. It takes just over twenty minutes for us to get to our destination. I look around the familiar outdoor plaza, but this time, it's different. Since we left earlier than last time, there are far more people. Groups are friends chatting and mothers trying to collect crazy kids. Everything is so lives and it fills me with a sense of happiness to see so much life in one area. I know I’m smiling like an idiot, but I can’t help it. I squeeze Shuu’s hand tighter as we make our way down the path.

 

“Scared?” he questions, looking down at me. 

 

I give him a shove and a light laugh. “No,” I say with a sigh. We continue to walk, passing other shoppers and stores. We eventually arrive at the music shop, that looks abandoned. The sign has a frowning face with the word ‘closed’ on it and there are only a few lights on.

 

“Are they not opened today?” I question.

 

Shuu smirks and digs something out of his pocket. He then reveals a key and says, “Oh, it's never closed for me.”

 

I don’t know how to feel about that. Did he come here, knowing no one would be here, just to have the shop to ourselves. That isn’t right, but he has the key which gives me the impression that he is allowed to come at will. He inserts the key and unlocks the door. He enters the store and I follow. I look around the store. It is the same as last time just with a lack of light.

 

Shuu lets out a sigh of annoyances. “I know you guys are in here, just come out.” There is no reply, which causes Shuu to let out another sigh. “Stay here, they’re probably in the back.”

 

I nod and he walks off to the other end of the area. I look around once more. I don’t want to move and there isn’t much light so I may end up tripping on something if I begin to wander. I decide to sit on the counter of the register desk as I wait for Shuu. I sway my feet as I think of what he might have done with the two. He told me he would come and see them every so often when he was sick of his school work. I guess they just played the instruments in here a lot. I can’t really see him as the kind that would go out and actually do things like go to the park, but he did say he was different when he was younger. 

 

I feel something touch, bring me out of my thoughts. Suddenly I feel something snake under my arms and grab a hold of my breast. Shock and frightened, I let out a horrid scream. Panic arises in me and I mind begins to race. 

 

A second later, I hear footsteps and the lights turn on. I turn to see the face of my attacker. I expect to see a creepy man with a sick, perverted look on his face, instead, it is one of a young woman. She smiles, her purple eyes seemingly popping out of her head.

 

“What are these?” she questioned, her hands squeezing my breast slightly.

 

“Yuzuki,” a voice says. We look over to see Shuu staring daggers into the girl next to me. I notice Izayoi just behind the vampire, the blue haired male trying his best to contain a laugh.

 

“Shuu,” the girl says to the vampire, “how did you get a girl with such a perfect rack?”

 

“Uh..” I say as I feel my face drain from its color. I look over at the girl and then back at Shuu. I let out an uncomfortable whimper, a sign that I’m not liking the situation in the slightest.

 

“Sis, please stop sexually harassing Shuu’s friend,” Izayoi says with a contradicting smile.

 

“No way,” she says. “Not only is she fine up there,” she removes her grip and takes a step back, “but this butt down here is looking quite good.”

 

I quickly jump off the counter as soon as I’m granted the liberty. I cross my arms over my chest and stare at the lady, Yuzuki. She has a devilish smile on her face, which gives me a weird chill. She looks like she is in her early twenties, with navy blue hair that is styled in a bob. Her purple eyes look straight at me.

 

“There is no way that thing is Shuu’s friend,” she says as she hops over the counter.

 

“You’re not going to have the title if you touch her again,” Shuu says, coming over to us.

 

She pouts and throws herself onto Shuu. I feel a ping of anger seeing her on Shuu like that, but I’m too confused to give it too much thought.

 

“Shuu~, don’t be so mean.” she elongates her words like a child. “If you leave then I’m not going to be able to look at your handsome face. I won't hurt her, I swear.”

 

“That’s not what I’m concerned about.”

 

She gives him a confused look and then realization washes over her. “Oh, I get it, you're jealous of what I said about her. Don’t worry, love, you have the best ass.” She reaches over and cups the vampire’s rear. He immediately jolts at the touch and his once composed face twist in a bit of discomfort and surprise. The expression makes the situation a bit funnier and I let out a laugh.

 

“I can agree with you,” I say. “I think his ass is the best, but I would prefer if you don’t touch it.”

 

“Ooh, so you guys are possessive,” she says with a wiggle of her brows. “I like it. Here I was thinking you two were merely friends with benefits and would care if I had some fun with the other. Now I can see that there is actual concern here.”

 

“Shut up,” Shuu says, pushing that girl away. “You’re just trying to justify a reason for you to touch us.”

 

“She is the mother of bullshit,” Izayoi says.

 

“I’m neither going to confirm nor deny that,” she said with a wink. She walks over to me and thrust out her hand. “I’m Yuzuki, age twenty-one, sexuality; lesbian, relationship; fre-”

 

“An unloyal bitch who can’t keep up a steady relationship,” Shuu says, cutting her off. She lets out a laugh as if she knows the statement is true. 

 

The atmosphere seems to ease and I allow myself to laugh along with the others. I take her hand and shake it. “I”m Hikari,” I say, and, following her example, follow with, “sixteen years of age, straight, and in a relationship with that lovely jerk over there.”

 

“Hah,” she says. “I like you already.”

 

“I thought you would like each other,” Shuu says. “But a grope attack wasn’t my idea of first impression.”

 

“Sorry about that, love,” she says towards me. I then notice that, even at the age of twenty, she is lacking in the upper area. 

 

“It’s fine, I think. You just startled me.”

 

“I just wanted to surprise Shuu’s lovely mate. I was so excited when he told us that you'd be visiting. I missed you last time because I got off early. But that doesn’t matter in the slightest because I’m here now.”

 

“Thanks for staying this time,” I say with a smile. 

 

Yuzuki lets out a squeal and squishes her cheeks with her hands. “You’re so cuuuute!” she exclaims and throws herself onto me. Instead of jumping like last time, I let out another laugh. She is unlike anyone I’ve ever seen for sure. She pulls me into a hug and says, “I’m going to eat you up ‘cause you're so adorable.”

 

“Please let go of her,” Shuu says with a sigh.

 

“No,” Yuzuki says glaring in his direction. “I’m stealing her from you and there’s nothing you can do about it. She is going to become mine.”

 

“Did she takes shots or something?” the vampire asks the other male. “She is more enthusiastic than usual.”

 

“I think she may have,” Izayoi says. “She was pretty nervous about meeting Hikari.”

 

“No way,” Shuu says with the shake of his head.

 

“Well I didn’t know who you’d bring through that door,” she said, letting go of me. “You’re basically my little brother and I was scared you're found a girl in your life to replace me.” she masks a hurt look and places a hand over her heart. “It would just tear me up if your girlfriend was some twit with freaking melons the size of beach balls. How do you think you're Onee-chan would feel?”

 

Shuu just stared at the blue haired female for some time, trying to comprehend the words coming out of her mouth. “Hikari, I think we should go, my friend here is obviously on something and it can be dangerous.”

 

“I thought you liked when people were looney,” I say, giving the vampire my own devils look.

 

“Oh, what do you mean by that?” Yuzuki says.

 

“Yes, do tell,” her brother adds.

 

“Well, this guy one day thought it would be funny to see me drunk. So he drugged me or his own enjoyment.”

 

Yuzuki lets out an astonished gasp. “He didn’t”

 

“He did.”

 

“Shuu, you are a horrible person,” she says to him. She places a hand on my head and stroked my hair. “See, an angel like Hikari shouldn’t be in the care of you. She shall be my waifu.”

 

“Keep you waifus to your anime characters,” Shuu say. “But she didn’t tell you the part when she was trying to find fairies in our music room.”

 

“I what?” I ask. I actually don't remember much from that night and this was the first time he said anything about it.

 

“You said you wanted to find fairies so you could fly. Then you began to ramble about Greek gods and said that I was Apollo and you're my Aphrodites.”

 

“Speaking of the God of music, I would love to hear you play,” Yuzuki says with a smile and clap of her hands. Before leaving my side, she says, “you can totally be my love goddess.”

 

We walk to the back of the shop where there is a piano in the corner. 

 

“How about you play something, Hikari?” Izayoi ask. “I haven’t heard you play yet.”

 

“Um,” I say, looking over to Shuu. He gives me a slightly concerned look.

 

“Don’t tell me you bragged about her and brought her over here without the intention she’d,” Yuzuki says with a teasing smile.

 

“Yeah, that would be silly,” I say with a laugh. I sit down on the bench and adjust the seat so it's to my comfort. I haven’t played since the night Natsume came. Even though I love playing, it just never felt right or I just couldn’t muster up enough. But there is something about the atmosphere that gives me the motive to play. I place my hands on the keys and take in a breath.

 

“Do you need a sheet?” Yuzuki asks.

 

“Nope,” I say and begin to piece. Shuu raises his eyes in surprise when I begin to play Nocturne in Eb. I play the whole piece with confidence, positive I won't mess up. Besides, what kind of student would I be if I didn’t give it all for my teacher and his friends? I finish the piece with what I hope to be no mistakes. I look up at Shuu and he smiles down at me.

 

“Good for you, flawless,” he says. 

 

I put on a wide grin, joy and confidence streaming through me. I then look at Izayoi and Yuzuki. “How about something more lively?” I say, a begin another.

 

And, or what seemed like hours, we played in the shop. Yuzuki and Shuu have a contest, the three of us play in a mini symphony, and Izayoi even pulls out a guitar and plays and amazing song. 

 

“Yo, Shuu,” Yuzuki says once her brother is done with his second guitar solo. “Why don’t go by one of the food stands and go get us something to eat?”

 

“Why me?” he questions, sitting up on the sofa I wasn’t surprised they had. 

 

“Do you expect for me or Hikari to go?” she says in a surprised voice.

 

“Yeah, Shuu,” I join in, my eyes wide with fake innocence. “You want one of us defenseless girls to go out into the night by ourselves? Well, I understand,” I say, placing my hand on my heart and the other on my forehead. “Let's go, Yuzuki. Maybe the creeps of the night would take pity on us.” The lady smiles and drapes an arm over my shoulder.

 

Shuu lets out a groan and shoots us a dirty look. “Why can’t Izayoi go?”

 

“I’m the shopkeeper, I can’t leave,” he argues half-heartedly.

 

“Fine,” the vampire says, getting up from his spot. Izayoi holds out some money and Shuu snatchs sit from his hands and leaves the shop. 

 

“That..was perfect,” Yuzuki says, high-fiving me. “I’ve been thinking of a reason for him to leave all night.”

 

“Why is that?” I ask.

 

“Okay, serious talk now,” she says, her smile disappearing. “How has Shuu been lately, and be honest.”

 

“He's been okay, I guess,” I say. “Something came up the last night, he came here which shook us both, but we’re both good now.”

 

“Hmmm, I see,” she says. “What about before that?”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Um, well,” she says, trying to find the right words.

 

“Yuzuki and I have known Shuu for some years now,” Izayoi begins. “He has always been distant from others. When he came into our lives about three years ago, he had these walls up. He was interested in the shop, which used to be my dad’s music shop where he gave lessons, and came around from time to time. He was skeptical about Sis and me when we tried to befriend him. It took some time, but we eventually created a bond. Around January of this year, he seemed happier, like something wonderful happened in his life.”

 

This must have been when Sakura came along. 

 

“But, when February came around,” Yuzuki continued. “He stopped coming. We didn't really know why. Shuu never told us where he lived or his school because he wasn't comfortable with it, which we respected. Then, after almost a month he came back saying he didn't want to see us anymore. I don't understand why, and he never explained. I called bullshit and, after a lot of yelling, he shut up and was back the next week. The thing is, Shuu is like a brother to me and I love the dude. Then, just a month ago, he seemed to turn back into that old, happier self. We knew something happened.”

 

“That was you, wasn't it?” Izayoi asks.

 

“I think it would be a bit narcissistic if I said I was the only reason or his sudden change,” I say with a small smile. “Shuu fell into a kind of depression around March after the loss of someone close to him. I know Shuu never really tells much, but you guys seem close enough to be entitled to the information at least. I met Shuu in September of this year, and that Shuu is a bit different from the Shuu of today. Things between the two of us have been complicated from the very beginning. The thing is, I think that we have changed and helped each other.”

 

So much has happened these past months. Everything with Yui, Shuu, and all the brothers is like nothing I’ve experienced before. Yeah, we’ve hurt each other down the road, but the journey to where we are now is one I can’t forget.

 

“I wish Shuu would just tell us this kind of stuff,” Yuzuki says with a huff.

 

“It is hard for him to show how he feels, you must have figured that out by now,” I say. “He is caring though and is very fond of the people he finds joy in.” I look up at the siblings. “Shuu is really paranoid he will lose you guys and the thought really tears him up. So make sure you stay by that jerk’s side.”

 

They both give me a smile. “Of course, we will,” Izayoi says. “Yuzuki won't let the bastard slip through her fingers.”

 

“Damn right I won’t,” she says. “Besides, I have yet to get him in bed.”

 

“Hey!” I shout with a smile and she cracks up in laughter.

 

“I’m joking, I’m joking,” she says with a dismissive wave.

 

“I thought you weren’t into guys.”

 

“There are some exceptions.” 

 

“If he’s like a brother, then that’s basically incest,” Izayoi says.

 

“Bro, if you weren’t my blood, I would have taken you by now.”

 

“I’m going to drop this here,” he says with a shake of his head.

 

“Hey, Hikari, have you guys boned yet?”

 

“Uh…” I say, my face flushing.

 

“You have, you have.” she basically jumps in her chair like a child.

 

“Only once, and that’s if you count half drugged sex,” I say softly.

 

“What!?” she exclaims, her joy gone. “You were half focus for your first time with him?”

 

“Please don’t remind me,” I say. I do remember some of that, but I rather not bring it up.

 

“I’m going to have to have a talk with that good for another, lazy-ass, mother fucker,” she says in frustration. 

 

“I fucked no one’s mother,” a voice says, making us all look in it direction. Shuu comes in with two paper boxes and raised brows.

 

“I could argue, but I’m starving, so let’s eat,” the bluenette says, ushering Shuu to sit down. Like requested he bought to takoyaki and also, sort of surprise, cake. 

 

“Holy shit you bought a cake,” Yuzuki says. “Bro, get the shot glasses and vodka, we’re going in.”

 

“NO!” Izayoi and I shout in unison.

 

“I don’t object to the suggestion,” the vampire says. I lightly punched him in the arm and murmur ‘sick bastard’.

 

“I’ll just get some juice,” Yuzuki says, getting up.

 

“I will,” her brother says “You’ll probably spike it or something.”

 

“Yeah, I don’t think I can trust her,” I say.

 

“Fuck you,” she replies.

 

“Hey, you don’t touch her,” Shuu says.

 

“Yeah, Yuzuki, fucking Hikari is Shuu’s job,” Izayoi says before leaving the area.

 

There is a mix of reaction to the comment, including my cheeks coloring once more. We spend some more time in there talking, laughing, and eating. The atmosphere is light and it is honestly one of the best things that happened in my life. Being surrounded by laughter and joy makes me feel like my problems are so far away. I look over at Shuu, who sports a small smile from time to time. I can tell he like it here, also.

 

Everything feels right, and I want to stay in this joy for as long as possible. 


	40. 40. Change

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi........
> 
> Okay, so I have absolutely no idea why this wasn't up a year ago, that is crazy. I'm soooo sorry for just up and leaving this. It has been done for some time now. The chapter before this was okay and could have been the ending chapter, but i wanted something a bit more to close. Again, so sorry and please enjoy

"Hey," Shuu says as he enters the room.

I don't answer.

"When did you get here?"

I don't reply.

"Are ignoring me?" Shuu comes over b me and sits on the couch.

I try to answer him, but I'm unable to speak.

"You're going to damage the book."

"Silence," I snap, not looking at the vampire.

"Hikari?"

I hear my name leave my lover's lips, making me become aware of my surrounding. I realise that I am clenching to book and that my knuckles are white. I blink a few times, trying to return back to reality. I look over at Shuu with a sheepish grin. "Sorry," I say.

"Gosh, what is happening in that story?" he questions, nodding at the book. "You were staring wide eyed at it and looked ready to destroy it."

"Oh, that," I say with a nervous laugh. "Shit just hit the fan. The girl finally confessed she was the one who wrote the letter to the guy, and his super mad at her and they haven't talked in forever and something has happened to him, and, just…." I let out a joyous sigh, limbs seemingly melting over the couch.

"I can tell that you're really enjoying it," he says with a half smile playing on his lips.

"I am, thanks again for it." I smile gleefully at him and give him a peck on the cheek. "Are we going to play today or it just a relaxing day?"

The vampire let out a scuff. "You haven't played here in days. If anything, you have broken our deal and you should have long been kicked out."

I hurt look plays on my face. "Ouch, that hurts. To think that you would kick me out of my sanctuary. You really are the cruelest of the cruel."

"Sanctuary?" Shuu questions, giving me a confused look.

I didn't notice I said it until he mentioned it. I bite my lip and look away from him. "Nothing," I say with a squeak.

"Tell me," he demands flatly.

"No."

"I'm not playing with you."

I focus back on the pages of the novel, hoping he will drop it. A second later the book is pulled from my grasp. I look up in surprise to see Shuu holding the book.

"I'm not going to give it back until you tell me what you mean," he says.

"Fine, keep the book," I saw with a smirk. He knows I'm the kind that is determine to get what I want, but if I don't act on my urge to retrieve the book, he has nothing on me. He raises a brow at me and I smile in triumph.

He then flips to the back of the book and begins to read out loud. "A few hours later he was having trouble breathing, and he lo-"

"Stop, stop, stop," I cry out, placing my hands over my ears. "Don't spoil it for me, no spoilers please."

"Are you going to explain?" he questions, looking up from from the page.

"Yes, I will, just don't tell me what happens," I plea. He smiles a smug grin and closes the book, handing it back to me.

"So, tell me about this sanctuary," he says, sitting on the arm of the couch.

"Uh, well," I say. "You can't laugh."

"I won't."

"So, ever since I first, you know, moved in, I felt overwhelmed. Seeing my sister for the first time in years, living with you six guys, going to school; it was a lot on me. But when I came in here, I just felt better. Like all my troubles and problem were somewhere else. Ayato and Laito didn't know about it and I had the comfort of music. So, since it was a place of sanity in my new, chaotic life, it sort of was a sanctuary."

"Why do you say 'was'?" Shuu questions.

"Well, I no longer need it to feel safe. It's nice and all, and I'm happy it's always the two of us with no one to disturb us. And even when we leave, there's the room in the house."

"Yeah, that room," he says with a deep exhale. I look at him with a curious glance. There's been a question on my mind ever since he first took me there.

"Shuu, why was that room locked?" I ask hesitantly. "Did...did something happen in there?"

"No," he says, closing his eyes and leaning against the wall. "I just had it locked because the piano was in there. That piano, it used to be in my room and Sakura used to always play it. After she died, well, it was too painful to keep it around, but I didn't want to get rid of it. I just wanted to lock it away."

'Along with your heart,' I think. Only after Shuu bops me on the head and mutters 'don't act all philosophical' do I realize I spoke the words aloud.

* * *

 

I take out the chicken breast from its place in the fridge earlier. I season the meat and prepare to cook it in the pan. The flame set on medium, I place the meat on the pan.

"Making me dinner?" a voice says, causing me to jump in surprise. I look over to see Shuu sitting on one of the stools of the island.

"Stop doing that," I say, placing my hand over my heart, feeling it beat with fearful surprise. You're going to give a heart attack."

"I can give you much more than that," he says with a sly smile. "Beside, I much rather you stay alive for now."

"Nah, if I die, I get to see where you're from."

"Monsters like me don't come from heaven," he says in a bored tone.

I send him a smirk before turning my back to him. "You think too good of me," I say with a lightness in my voice. I look down at the chicken in the pan. "Should I add something to this?" I ask myself.

"I'm not quite good I'm the kitchen, so I can't help you," Shuu says with a yawn, resting his read on the counter.

"I don't believe you, that oatmeal you made me that day belongs in a five store restaurant," I say, only half paying attention. I decide I need something from of the higher cabinets. Not wanting to ask the vampire infamous for his laziness for help, I climb on top of the counter.

"Hikari?" I hear Shuu ask, worry just barely audible in his voice.

"I'm good," I assure him. "I've done this many times; it happens when your short and like to cook. I've never fallen, so I'm go-" as I step over, I accidentally kick over one of the bottles on the counter. It lands right next to my pan, it's condiments spilling out. In a heartbeat, the whole pan is consumed by flames.

"Fuck!" I scream, jumping down from the counter. "Shit, shit, shitshitshitshit," I curse in my panic. I look over at Shuu, about the ask what to do, when I see his face. His eyes are wide in terror and his mouth slightly agape. His eyes are locked on the flames, watching them dance their dangerous dance.

I look back at the fire and then back at Shuu, but he's gone. My body moves before I can think. I place the bottle back up, turn off the eye, put the lid on the pan and move it. The flames soon die, just leaving the lingering smoke.

I stare at the burnt chicken, frowning at it like it is the reason for the fire. Where did Shuu go, and what was up with that look on his face? He looked completely terrified, like he just saw his death.

"What happened?" Reiji says as he enters the kitchen, a deep frown on his face.

"There was an accident," I say with a sheepish grin, my eyes landing on the pan. "Sorry."

The vampire rolls his eyes and rubs his temples like he is getting a headache. "I can't deal with this at the moment," he says more to myself. He looks up and me and asks, "was Shuu in here?"

"Yes," I say with a bit of hesitation. "Is there something wrong?" I question, concern filling my words. "He looked horrified when he saw the flames and just left."

He looks as if he is contemplating something for a moment. "How about you go to his room and ask him."

I look curiously at him; why would he say something like that? Did something actually happen to him? I lock eyes with Reiji for a moment. He's gaze is unwavering and he looks as if he is changalling me. Does he want me to see Shuu for a reason, or is he just pushing this chore onto me? Either way, I am worried sad I should see what is happening.

"Okay," I say, "I will."

Reiji tells me to take care of my mess first and I do that exactly. A cloud of smoke escape from the pan once I left the lid and I have to fan it out of my face. I throw out the meat and head to Shuu's room to see what is up.

"Shuu?" I question one I get to the door, hoping he's okay. There's no response and I slowly open the door. I peer into the dark room and see the silhouette of the vampire on the bed. I walk down the stairs and over towards him. Once I near him I notice that his knees are to his chest and that his hand is over his head. I'm unable to say a word at first, far too shocked to register the sight infront of me. Never have I seen him look so scared, like a child trying to shield himself from the storm.

"Shuu?" I say again, placing my hand on his shoulder, but he doesn't react. Biting my lip, I take his hand from his head and hold it in. I try to think of what he did when I had a panic attack. He held me and assured me that everything was alright, so I take that as my lead. I climb onto the bed next to him, never letting go of his hand. I take the other hand in my smaller one, rubbing circles on the back of it. For once, his hands are cold to the touch.

"Hey, Shuu, snap out of it," I say a bit louder. His eyes are still wide, looking in the direction of his lap, but weren't looking at anything. I lift up his head, making him look me in the eyes. His sapphire blue eyes are unfocused and look hazy. I shake his head some, but nothing work.

"Goddammit, Shuu, fucking answer me," I say with a mix of anger and worry. I shake him violently, not knowing any other tactic to try and help him out of whatever he is stuck in. Reiji told me to talk to him, but he seems to be stuck in his own world of terror. I never been on this side, trying to calm someone or ease them away from their trauma. I let go of him and give him one more sad look, hoping that he would meet my gaze. With a sigh, I lean against his side, hoping to give him some kind of comfort.

What feels like a century later, I hear labored breath from Shuu. I feel a rush of relief fill me. I move so I am sitting in front of him.

"Hey, Shuu, calm down, 'kay?" I say, putting my hands up. His eyes scan frantically around the room, searching for something.

"Where's Edgar?" he questions.

"Huh?" I ask, the name sounding familiar.

"Where is he? The fire, Edgar, where is he?" he tries to get off the bed, but I put my hands on him. My attempt is nothing compared to his vampire strength, and he easily gets off the bed. He is on his feet, frantically searching the room for the person he calls Edgar. I think heard about the name, he mentioned him before.

"Shuu, you and Edgar aren't friends anymore," I say, trying to remember what the vampire told me about him.

The vampire looks at me with bewildered eyes, as if I'm lying to him. He shakes his head slowly in denial.

"No, he didn't," Shuu said a bit hesitantly. "I still see him, the fire…"

"I don't know what you're talking about Shuu, but there is no fire." I don't know what to tell Shuu, I don't even have a good grip on the situation. "You said Edgar moved on, he's safe but he's not with you any more. The fire is gone and everything is alright."

I stand up and walk over to my stunned lover. He put my hands on the side of his face and kiss his slack jaw. I have to stand on the tips of the toes to be able to run my fingers through his hair. "But I'm here, okay? So let's sit down, take a breather, and see what is the matter."

With wide eyes, he nods his head and sits on the bed again. I feel my heart twist when I see his shaking hands. I've seen Shuu upset, bored, infuriated and been happy enough to laugh, but I have yet to see him so distressed. Is this how I am when I have panic attack, this shaken and uneasy?

"Hikari, where is Reiji?" Shuu ask.

"He's in the kitchen I believe," I say.

"Why did he do it?" Shuu questions with a hurt voice. "Why did he hurt Edgar and all of those innocent people? Is it because of me, I'm the one that hurt edgar and the people?"

I narrow my eyes in confusion at him. "Reiji had nothing to do with this. It was my fault that this happened, but nothing bad resulted."

I then remember how it is to grip reality when in this state of mind. It is normal to merge memories, fear, and events with whatever triggered the attack. I try to collect everything that he's said, trying to piece together an event that he might have mentioned with similar aspects. None come to mind, so I have try rely on my own words.

"You have to think of the now, Shuu," I say holding his head so we are looking into each other's yes. "Today, we were in the kitchen, talking. Edgar and Reiji were not there and the fire didn't hurt anyone. Do you understand?"

He nods his head, but still looks lost. I give him a pitying look and pull him close to me. I try to mimic his comforting gestures as best as I can. He doesn't react, just leans as stiff as a board against me. He doesn't make a noise nor does a muscle in his body relax. I'm lost on what to do, so I pat his back.

"I'm sorry," I hear him mumble, but it sounds so dead and void of emotion. "Edgar, I'm sorry."

He suddenly goes limp in my arms. I almost drop him and have to use most of my strength to move his body onto his bed. I feel a surge of panic when I notice that his eye are still wide open, but it seems as if he's sleeping. Not going to lie, it freaks me out, but I don't do a thing. My mind is torn on whether I should leave him and give him his space or remain in the room until he wakes and has a better mind set. I go with the latter.

I choose to sleep on the couch instead of the bed. I don't know how exactly Shuu will do when he wakes, and it could honestly be anything. I remember I once woke up feeling panicked and acted the first nurse I saw. It seems a bit harsh thinking that Shuu would try to do that to me, but I know if either one of us get hurt, the other would feel extremely guilty.

I lay on the sofa, the uneasiness in my gut never leaving. I look at my lover and he at me, but his eyes hold no emotion or life.

* * *

 

I wake from a dreamless sleep for reason unknown to me. I sit up from the couch I went to sleep on and looked around the room. My mind immediately when to Shuu and I stood from the couch and went over to him. He was sleeping soundly, eyes closed, and under the covers. He must have woken up at one point and went back to sleep. Even though he seems more peaceful now, the thoughts from earlier plague my mind and refuse to leave. I peek out the curtains and see that the sun is still in the sky, but low, so it's probably around four in the afternoon.

I brush the hair from his face behind his ear and kiss his forehead. Reluctantly, I leave his side to go to the bathroom. I look at myself in the mirror and realize that I have tear tracks on my face; I must have been crying in my sleep. I wash my face and run my fingers through my knotted hair a few times. My neck aches a bit, but nothing too bad.

As I walk out of the bathroom, my eyes go to Shuu's bed. My heart skips a beat when I see the vampire sitting up in the bed. I quickly rush over to him and throw myself on him before he can say word. I nuzzled my face into his neck, tears of joy and relief stinging my eyes.

"Woah, Hikari," he says, no doubt trying to figure out the situation.

"Jerk," I sniffle. I raise my head to look him in his eyes, and for once the confusion they held made me feel so happy. I place my hands on his cheeks and pull him into a kiss. Although he is completely lost, his lips fall into sync with mines. I kiss him with need and longing, indulging in the love filled affection. Shuu places his hands on my cheeks and slowly parts our lips. With a small whine, I tighten my arms around him, pressing my lips back on his. His hands travel up and entangled in the roots of my hair on the top of my neck. I gasp and he snakes his tongue into my mouth. His taste fills my mouth and I can't help but sigh a bit. A single tear rolls down my cheek as he overpowers me with ease and pushes me down onto the bed. With my back on the bed, he parts again.

"As much as I love kissing your beautiful lips," he says, his thumb skimming it, "I need to know why you're crying."

I stare up at him, wanting to get lost in his eyes like I have done countless times before, but this is not the situation for such needs to be played out. "You frightened me yesterday," I say softly.

My words seem to hurt him, and a guilt stricken looks plays on his face. He leans down and pecks my collarbone and travels upwards, leaving a trail of kiss. Each one is soft, like a feather's touch. He whispers into my ear, "I'm sorry, love."

"You're fine now, so it's okay," I say, patting his head and kissing his forehead. "It looked as if you had a panic attack or something of the sort."

He raised his head from my neck and gave me a questioning look with a raised brow. "Panic attack?"

"Y-Yeah," I say. He sits up fully and I follow his action.

"Over what, what happened?" He looks as confused as me, as if searching his memory for anything that would frighten him into a hectic state.

"There was a small fire in the kitchen and you looked frightened. The next second you're in your room questioning me about Edgar." Shuu immediately stiffen and his eyes grow wide. I place my hand on his lap, hoping it will help prevent him from freaking out too much. He's silent, but it looks as if he's fighting something inside himself.

"Shuu," I say, trying to get his attention. "What happened to your friend Edgar?"

The vampire blink a few times and inhales a deep breath. As he lets it out he rubs his face a bit, as if upset or contemplating on what to say. "I've told you before the Edgar was my friend, right?"

I nod my head, not speaking a word to allow the other to say what needs to be said.

"He wasn't just a friend, he was my first one. I was pretty young, and it was long before I met Izumi and his sister. Edgar and I always used to hang out. Whenever I was upset with my parents or brothers, I ran into the forest and, more than likely, he was there. I shared many memories with him, heck, I even invited him over before. And then, one day, his village burned."

I feel my heart sink at the words. I stare at Shuu, and I can tell that he is hurt by merely telling the tale of his past. I want to say something to comfort him, but nothing will leave my mouth, I rub circles on his hand with my thumb, I rest my head on his shoulder, assuring him that I'm here for him. He looks down at him and nods, as if he understand what I'm trying to convey.

"Anything else?" he says a bit reluctantly.

I try not to hesitate when I shake my head, but I notice that he catches the briefest pause I made in my movement.

"It's fine, just tell me what else I said or what happened. Better now than later."

Looking down I say, "where does Reiji play in?"

Shuu's hand immediately tightened on mine and his face hardens. He looks away, as if not wanting me to see his expression. "He's the one who set it on fire."

My jaw drops and I have to hold myself from pressing on. Shuu didn't have to looks back to tell that I was trying to hold back the question in my mind.

"He did it on his own accord to impress my parents and teach me a lesson of messing with humans." He sucks his teeth and mutters, "fucking bastard."

"That's not right," I find myself saying, "How could he do something like that? Just to please his parents he kills a whole ton of people. Innocent people die because of his pride and his need for attention, how disgusting. Edgar, his family and village, all gone."

"Hikari," Shuu says, placing a hand on my cheek which has turn a bit pink like the rest of my face, flushed with anger. "There's no need to talk about it, what's done is done."

He looks at me with sadden, blue eyes and I can almost feel the sadness he has. My heart throbs with pain, as if I'm sharing the emotion with him. His face shows hurt and a bit of guilt. Before I can stop myself, I whisper, "you blame yourself for his death, don't you?"

"It is my fault that the villagers died," Shuu said with a breath. "I'm the one that lead Reiji there."

"Shuu, it-" I try to speak, but I'm cut off.

"Hikari, I'm fine," he says. "Well, I'm going to be. Let's, let's just not press the matter."

"Okay," I say, looking down. My chin is lifted so I look at Shuu.

"I will tell you one thing to make you feel better, maybe. Edgar is still alive."

"Really?" I exclaim, surprise and maybe hope feels me. "Then why do you act as if he isn't? Do you still see him? Why aren't you friend-"

"He doesn't remember me."

I shut my mouth abruptly. I narrow my eyes in confusion at him.

"He goes by the name of Yuma now and he goes to the same school as us. He doesn't remember me." He lets a breath out through his nose, almost like a hidden laugh. "Quite frankly, he may even despise me now."

"Why haven't you told him?" I ask.

"I rather not try to knock him off his feet with that information. It would just mess him up in the head and I wouldn't want to make his life confusing by talk to him." Shuu puts his arms behind him and leans on them. "To me, he's Yuma and my friend Edgar has been gone for years at this point. Besides, sometimes the only thing you want is to see them one more time."

I jerk my head up to look at him in shock. The corner of his mouth is turned the slightest bit upwards. His small smile is contagious, because I find my own lips inching into a tiny and slightly wary smile.

"Seems like you like keeping secrets from people," I tease. "Anything else that you know that I may not remember?"

"Hmm, I'm not sure. Well there was that one thing," he says laying back down onto his bed.

"Hey, what is it?" I question, craning my neck so I can see him.

"Don't think you want to hear it."

"Come on, tell me."

"That night you were drunk, yo-"

"Which one?"

The vampire let out a soft chuckle. "It's actually a bit sad that you have to ask. It was the first. You wouldn't let me leave you and I had to stay in the room with you until you fell asleep."

I cheeks color a bit, knowing I was so needed for him even before I realized my affection for him. "We-well, don't act like you didn't want to stay with me," I counter, trying to play off my embarrassment.

"Oh really?" he asked with a curious yet smug look. "Why'd you say that?"

"Uuuh," I say, trying to come up with a reason. "Because, um.." a memory then enters my mind. "That night I had a nightmare, you were there." I look over to the vampire and sure enough, his smirk was gone he looked a bit surprised.

"Yeah," I continue. "I saw you in my doorway and then you left once you saw that Yui was there."

"You got me," he says.

"Oh," I deadpan and start pulling at my hair. "I wasn't even sure of that, to be honest. I actually just remembered it…" I trail off when I feel his hand over mine. I look over at him, a little shocked. He's face is relaxed and he smiles a little at me.

"You know it's kind of cute when you mess with your hair," he says. A blush immediately consumes my face. I jolt off the bed and stand there a bit awkwardly.

"I'm a bit hungry," I softly report. "I'm going to the kitchen."

"Okay," he says calmly.

I stand there for a second, not moving. "I, uh, thanks," I always myself to stumble out. Shuu doesn't usually say with like that, especially not as kind and sincere of a tone. "I like when you smile, you should do it more." With that I walk the distance to his door. As I open it I say, "you can join me if you like, I promise nothing with catch fire this time."

* * *

 

I walk the halls with the third year classrooms. I don't know which class Shuu was in last or where he goes after break, but he should be around here if he does attend his classes. I've never been to this part because there was never a reason to.

As I wander, a few students give me glances, but say nothing to me and let me do as I please. I look around as I go, trying to spot the orange haired vampire. Not fully paying attention to my surroundings, I bump into someone. I stumble back a little but catch myself before I fall. I look up to see a guy with brown hair, which is fashioned in a sloppy ponytail.

"Sorry," I say sincerely.

"Yeah, you better watch where you're going," he retorts. "Shrimps like you should watch it before you get trampled."

I turn and mumble, "sheesh, I said sorry."

"What did you say?" I hear the guy say, making me freeze in my tracks. I feel a wave of panic wash over me. I immediately regret my words, fearing that he will physically take his annoyance out on me.

"Yuma," a firm voice says from behind him. The guy turns and I look over his shoulder. A male student, about as tall as Reiji, stands there. He has blue hair and his just as blue eyes stare coldly towards us. "We need to go, there's no reason to be fooling around."

"Fooling around with this shrimp," the guy, Yum, counters spitefully. "Tsk, like hell I would."

Yuma, I've heard that name. My eyes instantly widen in realisation. "You're Yuma?" I ask in disbelief.

He stares back at with a scowl. "What's it to you?"

I have to keep myself from gasping. Its Edgar. "You...S-" I can't find what to say, but I'm able to catch myself from saying something I shouldn't. Shuu said that he was leaving it and it's not my place to say a word. "You should go."

He scuffs. "I would would have if you weren't holding me up," he turns around and puts his hands in the pocket of his pants and walks away. I linger in the hall, staring in the direction he went in.

Even though I have so many thoughts in my head of what I could have asked or said, I wouldn't dare. It all comes down to one simple notion; Shuu doesn't want want him to know. I can't go against my lover's wishes. I lace my fingers together behind my back and walk on down the hall, filing the event away in my memory.

I soon find Shuu resting on one of the staircases, head leaning against the railing wall. I sigh with a smile on my face as I lower myself so we are eye level with each other. "Sleepyhead, wake up," I say, poking his cheek.

He opens one eye to look at me. "Oh, it's just you," he murmurs before closing his.

"What does that mean?" I question, faking a pained expression.

"It mean that it's no one I need to punch in the face for bothering me."

"You wouldn't punch someone for that reason."

"How would you know?" He opens his eyes and gives me a challenging look.

"It would take too much effort," I explain with a smirk. Shuu got up from the stairs and started descending down the stars. I stared up at him with a questioning look.

"Aren't you coming?"

With light steps, I follow him down that stairs and halls. His steps are lazy but are bigger than mine so I have take walk quickly behind him. Just being with him always made me feel fuzzy inside, a joyous feeling. If I brought things up about the past or did anything he wouldn't like, it would destroy this very aroma.

I slide my arm around his, linking them together. He looks at me with a raised brow and I only smile back up at him. He scoffs and looks away but I see his lip curling up ever so slightly. Yeah, I would hate to mess this it, it's good how it is now.

* * *

 

The house is quiet, a very rare state for it. Usually, there is some sort of activity going on that involves chatter or sound, but not now. Everyone is asleep or should at least be in their room. I'm not though. I stand in front of Shuu's bedroom door, my shaking fist raised to knock but I don't. I feel pathetic, like a child going too their parents after having a bad dream. Well, it's not that much different, except I'm sixteen and bad is an enormous understatement. I was paralyzed with fear and sweat running down my brow. I hurried too Shuu's room, but now I feel selfish and rude for trying to burden him with my problem.

I sit down on the floor and lean my back against the door. I need to calm down and stop over reacting. I look around the dark hallway, trying to get my mind off the hellish dream. But it only reminds me of the darkness that engulfed me when I woke up.

At the edge of sanity, I turn around and knock on the door. Within a heartbeat the door open and I'm greeted by Shuu's shimmering blue eyes.

"Took you long enough," he comments with a solemn expression. I gaze up at him with wide eyes, not saying a word. He gives me a sympathizing look and wraps his arms around me in a hug. I allowed him to hold me as I sniffle into his shoulder. He runs his fingers through my messy head of hair as he tightens his other hand around my waist. "It's okay, I gottcha."

I nod my head, my forehead rubbing against his bare chest. The warm the radiates off of him soothes me and I find my raging heart calming down by simply listening to his. Having him hold me so close assured me that I was protected, that nothing can get past him to harm me.

He steps back for just a second so we can go too his bed. I cling to him the during the small duration of time it takes too get too the other side of the room. He doesn't mind and holds my hand with a determined expression, his body saying he won't let go.

He sat me on the bed and I lean into him. He rubs my shoulder and whispers words of comfort into my ear.

"It must be annoying dealing with this," I say softly.

"I'm fine with it," he answers. "I want to be here for you when you need someone. Isn't that what everyone needs from time to time, a person that can support them?"

I raise my head to I can look into Shuu's eyes. They stare back down at me, and gives me a small smile. His orange hair is a mess and looks like mines when I wake up. I feel his sturdy arms that hold me so close.

"I love you, Shuu," I whisper before pressing my lips to his. He seemed shocked for a moment, but he doesn't let it faze him. He moves his lips with mine, tightening his hold on me. The kiss deepens, making me let out a soft moan.

Shuu pulls back and looks at me. His face is serious when he asks, "Do you want this?"

"I do," I say so softly I'm surprised he even heard me.

He lays me down own the bed and trails his hands down my side. Looking me in the eyes he grabs the bottom of my shirt and pulls it off of me, exposing my torso. I want to move my hands to cover my scars, the reminders of my past, but he grabs my hand.

"It's fine," he says, raising my hand and kissing it. "I love you for you, all of you." He plants a kiss on one of my larger marks. With feather like kisses, he makes his way up my torso. He stops once he gets to my bra, giving me another look. I make quick work of removing the undergarment as I give me a pink cheeked smile.

"And I really like these," he says with a smirk as he grabs a hold of my right breast. I let out a sigh at the contact. He kisses one as he massages the other. I run my fingers through his knotted hair as he lightly bites my nipple. A moans leave my throat at the action and I push his head down further.

I cans see the mischievous look in eye as he pinches my other niplpe as he sucks harshly on the side of my neck. He removes his mouth to kiss mine. Our tongues intertwined as we kiss, heating it even more. I thrust my hips against his hardening crotching, the layers of clothes getting in our way.

We break from the kiss and Shuu sits on his knees to allow me to sit up right. I shake off my pants and begin to get him out of his. I try to hide my smile when I realize that he doesn't have underwear on under his pants. Without a second thought, I reach out my hand a wrap my fingers around his shaft that is already half hard. I don't make eye contact with him through the process, knowing my cheeks are a flaming pink.

I move my hand up and down his member, stoking it until it's at it's full length. He gives groans of pleasure, which only excites me even more.

"Hmm, you're so good," he groans, his low voice sending a shiver down my spine.

I blush with a smirk, finally allowing myself to look up at him. "I'm happy it pleases you."

"You know what's even better?" Shuu asks as he removes my hand, lowering me down with a soft push. I let out a shaking gasp as I feel his hand touch my thigh. He runs his hand up and down it, strokes soothing and warm. I can feel myself tremble with arousal as his hand got higher and higher.

"Shuu, please," I moan with a gasp, looking down at him with a begging look.

"Of course," he cooed, a smirk forming on his lips. His hand moved over my private, two fingers slipping into my wet entrance. I gasp with a smile, feeling him inside of me. I know it isn't want I want, but just knowing it is him makes the experience all the more pleasurable.

"You like that, don't you?" Shuu asked as he thrusted his fingers into me, teasing me as he stretched me.

"I-I do," I stutter. "But, I, ah, I don't want you to play. I want that big cock of yours in me, please." Need starts to cloud my mind and all I want is to be one with him, to feel him take me all.

He chuckles, making me tremble in anticipation. "I can't deny you when you ask like that."

He moves up closer, and I can feel his member touching my entrance. Shuu's eyes meet mine, the same with our lips as he kisses me passionately. Slowly, he eases his way into me, causing me to moan in euphoria.

"Ngh, Shu-ah-u," I moan out as I feel him fill me. It feels so good, having him inside me. The pleasure radiates through my whole body.

Shuu looks at me with lust filled eyes. "Don't you dare stop saying my name," he growls as he begins to thrust into me.

I let out a howl of pleasure as he moves in and out of him, his shaft hit the right spot each time. I let out his name as if it's the only word I know, it's the only thing I want to know.

"Ah, Hikari," he groans as he pulls out only to slam right back in with a hard thrust. "You feel so good."

I feel tears of pleasure well in my eyes, enjoying every moment of this bliss, of Shuu. I wrap one of my arms around his shoulders, my hand finding his hair and threading my fingers through it.

He leaves marks all down my neck and collarbone, making me groan with pleasure. I can feel his shaft pulsing inside me, knowing his close to his limit as well.

"Sh-ah-uu, please, ngh, inside," I pant to the vampire.

"No, mhm, I can't, Hi-"

"Pl-ah-ease," I plead breathlessly. "Its, ah, ah, fine, nga, trust me, ah." I wrap my legs around the male, trapping him. I know he can easily break away, but he doesn't. He changes our position so I am on top. I feel him reach even deeper into me, making me moan even louder. I thrust my hurst continually as he does the same, making me cry out fervidly. I feel like I'm on fire, the pleasure bringing overwhelming heat. He looks me and the eyes, his sapphire blue eyes staring at me. He leans down and takes my lips with his. We kiss as he continues to thrust into me and I wrap my arms around his neck. I break away as I pull him closer to me.

"Shuuuu!" I cry in euphoria as I feel my walls tighten around him. A second later I feel his hot seeds spill into me. Everything goes white for a second and I hear nothing. All I can do is feel the heat and pleasure throughout my body. I soon come down from my high, my surroundings becoming clear. I notice that I'm laying on a breathless Shuu, who stares up at the ceiling and then at me.

"Hikari, why d-"

I silence him with a peck on the lips. "Shhh, give me a second," I say between breaths. We stay still, collecting ourselves. "Can we go shower?" I ask after a long minute.

"Sure, you can g-"

"Together," I say quickly. "May we go together?"

"Yeah," he say, kissing the top of my head. We leave the bedroom and head for bathroom, and by we I mean Shuu walking and caring me. We enter his bathroom and he quickly starts the shower. I step in, allowing the warm water to flow over my body. I sigh at the feel of the water drenching my sweaty hair. Shuu soon joins me, cloth in hand.

"May I?" he questions will a small smile.

"You may," I say. He then proceeds on washing me. He glides the soapy cloth over my body gentle, treating my body with unworldly care. I melt at his touch, whether direct or indirect. He cakes my body is soap suds, cleaning every inch of me. I then hear the cloth drop with a squishy splat and feel Shuu draping his arms over my shoulders. He kiss and nibbles on my ear.

"Why did you want me to do that?" he questions lowly, barely audible because of the falling water. I don't need to question him to know what 'that' means.

"Because I wanted all of you," I reply. "Although it feels funny leaving."

"Do you even know what could happen?"

"If you know the possible outcome, why did you agree?" I question, turning so I can face the vampire.

"Because you told me to trust you, which I do."

I smile softly at the vampire. "Then don't worry," I tell the vampire although I know it isn't a realistic request. We finish up in the shower, which includes Shuu washing my hair, and go to his bed. He lets me wear one of his t-shirts. I sit on his bed and he lays on my lap. I comb through in damp hair, twisting his strands.

I can tell he is still thinking about that happened. I don't want him to be so uneasy, leaving him like this would be cruel of me. It is about time I tell him anyways. "Female sterilization," I say.

"Huh?" Shuu questions, opening his eyes and raising his head from my lap to look at me.

"I'm sterilized," I say quietly. "I wasn't treated the best during my final months with Natsume. He did do awful things and, well, the last thing he wanted to happen was for me to get pregnant. Since his father dealt with human trafican before and it was a common practice to perform surgery on the women, Natsume already had the connections to do as he pleased. And he didn't hesitate to add me to the list of surgical patients." I placed my hand on my lower abdomen, tracing my finger over the covered scar that was left from the surgery. "I don't know if it can be undone or not, but, whether its because I'm still young or the lack of money, the doctors at the hospital never fixed it. I honestly don't have much detail. All I know is that I live with it now."

"So, that time in the music room…" Shuu says and I nod my head.

"It was because of my surgery. There usually isn't any side effects, but the surgery could have been done sloppily or it could just be because I'm young and my body wasn't ready for it. So any time I'm about to hit my cycle, I start getting these excruciating cramps." I let out a dry, forced laugh. "I guess the sex didn't help with that either. My cycle only lasts like, three or four days because of it, so I guess there's a plus.

I look up to see the vampire's expression a mix of pity and anger, no doubt furious of the man that left me scarred in far too many ways. I hate talking about him, especially since it makes Shuu so angry.

"It's fine, though," I say, although I know I'm lying to the both of us. "It's not that big of a deal, it's no-"

"But it is!" Shut snapped. "He did so many horrible things to you then, and now it still affects you. You go through monthly torture now, and what if you wanted kids? He took that all away from you. He made your life a living hell."

"And you saved me from that," I counter, placing a hand on his. "And I can never repay you for that." I look at him with soft eyes. "Come on, you need a relaxer."

The vampire gave a raised brow. "Round two already?"

My face colored with embarrassment. "No, stupid." I stood up, taking his hand in mine and leading him out the door. I didn't have to guide him, he already knew where we were going.

We play for at least an hour in our private music room. I opt for the violin at first, but switch to the piano for the last song. Shuu allows me to pick what I want to play and we spend our time together, listening to the sound of fingers tapping keys and bows gliding over strings.

After some time, Shuu insists we go to bed, but I him to go before me. He does and I'm left in the room for a good while by myself, not wanting to go back yet. It doesn't surprise me when he shows back up.

"What are you still doing in here?" Shuu ask with a sigh.

"Thinking about things that should be left alone."

"Such as?"

"What my life would have been like if I declined to go to the Keis house. What would have happened if we stayed inside the night Kaname died. How long I would have lived if you didn't come that day. If I would still be hanging around the Church. How different my life here would have played out if I didn't go to that music room the first day of school. You know, the major things that seem to change my life."

"Are you regretting any of them?"

"I'm not sure. Of course, there I thing I wish didn't happen, but I think they're all contributed to where I am now. They lead up to now. Me being here with you and Yui. These events brought us together, as odd as it is."

Shuu nods and sits on the bench. "'You can't pick out the piece you like and leave the rest. Being part of the whole thing, that's the blessing'. That's how it goes, right?" Shuu ask. It takes me a moment to realize he is quoting Tuck Everlasting.

"Yeah, I guess that's true," I say with a sigh as I push against him with my shoulder. "You're so cheesy."

"Do you think of that stuff often? Y'know, if things played out differently."

I shrug my shoulders. "Ever so often. I try not to dwell on it. It can't be changed."

"Right," he says with a nod. "It took me some time to get that in my head. The other night I was thinking the same thing, what would have happened if I just stayed away from Sakura like I did with the rest? Would she have just ended up as another forgotten girl? How long would she have been with me if I figured she was feeling so isolated. But then I thought, if that was the case, I would have probably never met you. A simple change to either one of our past could have made things so much different."

"Like playing song," I say. "Pressing a different key or gliding the bow over one more string can begin a new piece from what you started."

"But which do you like more; the one you started with or ended with?"

"Well, I don't know," I say with a shrug. "You just have to keep playing."

"It's like all those months ago," I say

"Why do you say that?" Shuu says, looking over at me.

"I'm in the music room, my favorite room in the house, playing the piano, my favorite hobby, with my favorite person." Like when I was in that house, playing in the music room with Natsume. "But, it's all different. A different room, different pieces, a different person." I look over at Shuu with a smile. "A different me."

"Not exactly," Shuu says. "You are the same girl that went to that Church so often, who lived in the house with the Keis, who went through inhuman thing, who helped me fix my life. That is the same, she just changed."

I place my hands on the keys. Shuu peers down at me and I gaze up into the sapphire blue eyes I fell in love with.

"Mind showing her something new?" I ask with smile.

"Why not?" he answers. "Maybe this will be easier than the last one, you sure did struggle a lot with that one."

"It's been forever since I did something new," I admit nudging him. "Besides, you're not the best teacher."

"I can teach you many things," he says with a suggestive wink and a sly smile.

"Jerk."

"Didn't you say I was your jerk?"

I smile and place my hand over his. "Yeah, you are. Now shut up and play."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, that's it. I want to say thank you from the very bottom of my heart to everyone who has ever read my story. This was my first serious fanfiction and I am so happy I decided to write it. I never knew it would become so popular and all I expected was a few hundred reads, a single comment, and three chapters of complete shit. I made a story that I am proud of and I am so happy for everyone's support. Now, I can officially say that I have completed my first full fanfiction. Yay, thank you all again so much, it means the world to me.


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